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https://youtu.be/7jSBHbvgrZY

Ethel Cain - Chapel Hill

Fast As You Can (Live)

lyrics: 

Perfumed cream linen sheets, and your worn denim jeans in a pile on my floor
You smell like sweet milk and old marijuana, i say baby do you wanna get to know me some more

So we make love in the back of your 65' cadillac
On the way upstate to my parents' for the holidays
You're the best thing for me and the worst for my body
I'm sorry but i can't love you more
Cause you're such a good boy, and you know it

Sit across from my dad at the table
Do you work with your hands, son?
For as long as i'm able
He loves you, he approves
He doesn't know what you do
To his daughter, now that you've got her
Jesus christ, i love you

When we fuck in my childhood bed
I go all shades of red, babe, i love you the best
Watching you get undressed, in the light of the window
I cry when you leave but i love watching you go

You're such a good boy
And you know it

good boy - ethel cain

I know you better now than I ever have before
I know you better now that our clothes are on the floor
And I had started shaking when you walked in through the door
But I’m not scared anymore, I’m not scared anymore
And I’ve never felt more alone with your arms around my shoulders
But I know if you left i’d cry myself to sleep praying that you’d hold me closer
But I see your face in the lamplight
And suddenly I don’t wanna die, I don’t wanna die
And I don’t need to be happy anymore
I just need to know that I’m yours
So will you tell me that I’m yours
You sleep so deeply cause you hope you won’t wakе up
But I tread so lightly cause i’m scared you’ll sеlf destruct
And I know that we’d go up in flames but I can’t help myself
Cause I'd die if I knew you found safety in the arms of someone else
And I, don’t need, to be happy anymore
I just need to know that I’m yours
Oh will you tell me I’m yours
That i’m yours

White Silas ~ Room 209

lyrics:

I've been sleeping in the dead body
Of a dead deer out by I-40
I dragged it there as a bed
And consummated my love
In a purple stitch
Like a scratched out itch
I am ugly, I fear
I believe what I hear
And now the push has come to shove 

I wanna waste myself
And go take a drive
Take too sharp a corner
And probably take a life

In the end of it all
When you can hardly move
And they say you’ve still got the world to go
Stay strong
It’s a long, unfortunate while til curtain call, call

I’ve been poking at the dead body
Of the man that I oncе loved in my garden
He was good to mе and I went and I soiled his love
I will not see heaven
Surrendered to the fauna
Am I a bad person
For not knowing what I wanted

I couldn’t face myself
So I avert my eyes
Take two shots in warning
And then take the dive
And I dive

Into the end of it all
When you can hardly move
And they say you’ve still got the world to go
Stay strong
It’s a long, unfortunate while til curtain call, call
So I call
Dreading the one
That one good morning
Will destroy me
When you’re gone
We’ve been young
Immortal, even
But now we turn and wait for kingdom come

You can leave the windows open
Here in our forever home
Bite down on your shoulder
And if you bleed, then I’ll know

a long, unfortunate while - ethel cain

prepare to meet thy god
for he regrets giving you up
you have evaded her thus far
for 20 long years
but she has put the poison in your cup
your mother cries for you
she lies awake at night in tears
your father left a week right after you did
he still doesn’t know why you disappeared
i ran away into the woods to find you
and in the mouths of vultures I
found where you had been
i ran into the woods to find
a man who never loved me
and I came out a woman born again
i found you in the mouth of vultures
and I found you in the grip of cain
a found you in the mouth of vultures
and I found you in the grip of cain

Vultures | Ethel Cain

Highway Horses - Ethel Cain

ethel cain - knuckle velvet early demo

(i think this was made under ethel cain but idk)

six weeks we’ve been taught
six weeks the phone’s been ringing 
and now the sheriff’s at the door
at two weeks my insides screamed
i was coughing up blood by three
by four my father couldn’t take it 
and hung himself in the yard from the oak tree
my mother said be patient
it’s what god said to her
get down on your knees and pray with me 
you won’t get blessings you don’t deserve
see how long 
see how far
a little will go
jesus christ, he loves me
this i know
the bedsheets stained with my sister’s waste
my brother’s eyes crusted shut
the dogs stopped crying weeks ago
with my hands digging deep inside their guts
i ache all over
i can’t get clean
my bones start to bend inside of me 
but god forbid i question what he asks me to do
i just hope he gets here soon
see how long 
see how far
a little will go
jesus christ, he loves me
this i know
i hold my mother she won’t hold me back
they cut down my father and his broken neck
they found the baby in a dirty cloth upstairs
while my brother and my sister just rot 
one takes me in his arms and then he runs outside
but they are too late now, i’m already in the light
i’m the only one jesus comes to take
as he takes my hand and i waste away