To the Beach
(c) J. Murdock McInnes Vasey

[instrumental]

Seven stupid kids, riding on a train
Riding in the rain, going to the beach
Travelling at night, doing it for fun
Planning to come back, on the empty run

Waiting by the track, laying on the grass
Soon the train would slow, coming round the turn
Waiting for the car, run and climb the sides
Flat down on the load, we would try to hide

Heading out of town, we could now relax
We could sit on top, there would be no stops
Riding all the way, next stop at the coast
The train would slow way down, 

coming into town

[instrumental]

We would walk down to the beach, about half a mile
We would joke and laugh, everyone would smile
It was way too cold, but we did not care
We would all get wet, all on just a dare

The train went back at noon, rode all afternoon
The cars were now all empty, we sat down on the floor
Just fooling around, Dave hung out the side
We came to a tunnel, then we heard the cry

There was nothing we could do, there was no way to stop
Two hours before the town, sitting facing down
We all sat and stared, we were so damn scared
Got back into town, 

raced and scrambled down

[instrumental]

We ran to the man, sitting at the office
We told him our sad story, he said not to worry
Dave was back at home, he had got a ride
He walked to the road, jumping off the side

Seven stupid kids, riding on train
Riding in the rain, going to the beach
Travelling at night, doing it for fun
Planning to come back, on the empty run

Seven stupid kids, 
Seven stupid kids, 
riding on train
Riding in the rain

[instrumental]


To the Beach (B side)

What Is Life
(c) J. Murdock McInnes Vasey

[intro]

What Is Life?
Yeah, What Is Life?
Don't ask me
I don't know, ask my wife

If I knew, would it matter
In an ocean of water
I'm a drop with no name
We all are the same

[instrumental]

Life is debt left unpaid
full of words left unsaid
It is hopes spent on dreams,
vague thoughts never seen

Lived on lands never been,
all our plans only schemes
Wild desires never shown,
burning fires all alone

What Is Life?
I don't know, ask my wife

[instrumental]

Things like that
I don't know
Thoughts like that
I don't show

I keep them inside
Only place I can hide
I go to work when it's nice
I don't tell the guys

They don't ask about that
They don't care anyway
You can walk up to them
and ask plain as day

What Is Life?
But you know what they'll say
I don't know, ask my wife
Ask my wife

Ask my wife

[outro]

What is Life (very retro)

At Three in the Morning
(c) J. Murdock McInnes Vasey


[intro]

It is three in the morning
And here I am, one more time
At three in morning
I can write, I have time

At three in the morning
A time you think is night
Everything is so much clearer
Everything just comes out right

I can think, I can dream
Ponder stuff, and make up schemes
I can worry, with no hurry
And some things, well, I can bury

[instrumental]

When I get up way too late
With voices all around me
With dogs that want attention
I can't worry 'bout redemption

You cannot have the deep thoughts
Too many things will get forgot
They come up in your mind
Among barks, they're left behind

[bridge]

But, at three in the morning
At three in the morning
Before the day is dawning
I can write, I can write

[instrumental]

At three in the morning
A time you think is night
Everything is so much clearer
Everything just comes out right

I can think, I can dream
Ponder stuff, and make up schemes
I can worry, with no hurry
And some things, well, I can bury

[bridge]

But, at three in the morning
At three in the morning
Before the day is dawning
I can write, I can write

[outro]

At Three in the Morning (clear squeaky)

Coming Clean (v4)
(c) J. Murdock McInnes Vasey

[intro]

I am sorry in advance
I know that I can't sing
Can't recognize a tone
Can't play a god damned thing

[verse]

I cannot keep a beat
I just keep tapping on the floor
I don't know what I'm doing
And I know nothin' more

I don't claim to write the music
Or play an instrument
I can't do this on my own
I can't hold the microphone

All I do is write the words
I make them sound like what I've heard
All the rest is the machine
You see, I'm coming clean

[instrumental]

I wish that I was better
Don't think that I don't try
I wish that I knew more
All I've got is this A.I.

Some may say that it's not fair
Why do they play my songs?
It may be I don't belong
So, I am, a little scared

No one wants to work with me
All I have is an A.I.
I may be pissing up a tree
But I thought that I would try

[instrumental]

You can take all that I have done
You can use a little bit
Or gut the whole damned thing
And tell me that it's shit
Or you can use it in your song
It cannot be all wrong
Don't tell me to go home
It cannot be all wrong

It would be nice to work with people
It would be nice to have a friend
I could be the Bernie
But I need Elton in the end

I could be the Bernie
But I need Elton in the end

I need Elton in the end

[outro]

Coming Clean

I Am an Old Man in a Room
(c) J. Murdock McInnes Vasey

[intro]

I am an old man in a room
And the room is pretty nice
It is quiet and a bit gloomy
But I have plenty of lamps
It is warm enough in winter
And cool in summer too
But I have a real nice sweater
And I always wear blue

It has a bathroom round the corner
and a mattress on the floor
A closet for my stuff
I don't need very much more

I keep it pretty clean
Cleaner than my jeans
I have my little broom
and a vacuum with a battery
I will use it real soon

[instrumental]

There are bugs stuck in my ceiling
I sometimes see them while I'm writing
and I wonder what they're thinking
I think that they are laughing

At night I hear mice
They scratch inside the walls
I have seen them, they look nice
But they poop and eat my rice

[bridge]

But I'm an old man in a room
And though the room is pretty nice
Just sitting here alone
It's bound to have a price

I have time to write some songs
But I don't have very long
Maybe I should go out
But I always act all wrong


But I'm an old man in a room
And though the room is pretty nice
Just sitting here alone
It's bound to have a price

It's bound to have a price

It's bound to have a price


[outro]

I Am an Old Man in a Room

It's a Woman's World
(c) J. Murdock McInnes Vasey

[intro]

Women run the world
and they talk a real good game
They say that it's the men
That it's the men who are to blame

I don't really believe it
It is not like that at home
I do all that she says
But she won't leave me alone

[bridge]

I don't really want to work
I want to stay at home
But she says she has a job
And to stop being a slob

I want to just eat junk
I don't want for her to bother
But she cooks just what she wishes
I have to do the dishes

[instrumental]

When her birthday comes around
She says I should remember
I know it's on a day
I just don't know the number

I get tired of the same story
They say it's us that they adore
It is men who have to worry
When they see purses at a store

She remembers when we married
I have tried to forget
I was drunk when I proposed
and to the judge she had me carried

[instrumental]

My life is all like that
I don't think men run a thing
I just get told we need to chat
and I find out just where I'm at

Women run the world
and they talk a real good game
They say that it's the men
That it's the men who are to blame

[instrumental]

My life is all like that
I don't think men run a thing
I just get told we need to chat
and I find out just where I'm at

Women run the world
and they talk a real good game
They say that it's the men
That it's the men who are to blame

it's the men 

it's the men 

it's the men who are to blame


[outro]


It's a Woman's World (cool)

Too Many Things (1b - blues)
(c) J. Murdock McInnes Vasey


[intro]

[verse]
That was a place to start
Soon before things fell apart
But not now, no such luck
We all seem to be stuck

The big things
They cost too much, 
We can't decide
We try to hide
But little things, 
they cost far more
We've lost control, 
don't know the score

[pre-chorus]
Everywhere you look
Something else is going away
Another thing we took
It won't last another day

[chorus]
Too many things, 
Too many things
Can't fix them all
Can't even start
Can't think about it
Breaks your heart

[instrumental]

[verse]
Every hope lands on the rocks
Every ship's going nowhere
You'd like to care, 
but you don't dare

While some pretend it isn't true
It doesn't end for me and you
While some think they'll get away
You and I, 
no place to stay

[pre-chorus]
Everywhere you look
Something else is going away
Another thing we took
It won't last another day

[chorus]
Too many things, 
Too many things
Can't fix them all
Can't even start
Can't think about it
Breaks your heart

We have all, run out of luck

[verse]
Too many things, 
Too many things
Can't fix them all
Can't even start
Can't think about it
Breaks your heart

Too many things, 
Too many things

[outro]

Too Many Things

Coming Clean (v4 roadhouse blues)
(c) J. Murdock McInnes Vasey

[intro]

I am sorry in advance
I know that I can't sing
Can't recognize a tone
Can't play a god damned thing

[verse]

I cannot keep a beat
I just keep tapping on the floor
I don't know what I'm doing
And I know nothin' more

I don't claim to write the music
Or play an instrument
I can't do this on my own
I can't hold the microphone

All I do is write the words
I make them sound like what I've heard
All the rest is the machine
You see, I'm coming clean

[instrumental]

I wish that I was better
Don't think that I don't try
I wish that I knew more
All I've got is this A.I.

Some may say that it's not fair
Why do they play my songs?
It may be I don't belong
So, I am, a little scared

No one wants to work with me
All I have is an A.I.
I may be pissing up a tree
But I thought that I would try

[instrumental]

You can take all that I have done
You can use a little bit
Or gut the whole damned thing
And tell me that it's shit
Or you can use it in your song
It cannot be all wrong
Don't tell me to go home
It cannot be all wrong

It would be nice to work with people
It would be nice to have a friend
I could be the Bernie
But I need Elton in the end

I could be the Bernie
But I need Elton in the end

I need Elton in the end

[outro]

Coming Clean (pissing up a tree)

Culting
(c) J. Murdock McInnes Vasey

[00:00] [intro]

Are you feeling stupid
Are you feeling like an idiot
Do you remember anything
Did you remember what to bring

We told you when you started
We told you how it was
If you are not prepared
It's because you are an ass

This is the place you wanted
This is the life you asked for
Well now, you should enjoy it
It's the only one you paid for

[00:55] [instrumental]

You now wear funny robes
And a ridiculous hair style
You dance around like chickens
Then bang your head and smile

You stand out in the rain
And walk around for miles
You sing like a baboon
Then bang your head and smile

Yes, you are an idiot
And getting worse with each new day
Take off your underwear
Cut off all of your hair

Come here and lay beside me
I am all that you desire
You will do all that I tell you
You will jump into the fire

[02:08] [instrumental]

If you wanted something else
You should have tried a little harder
But you are so god damned lazy
And you know your thinking's hazy

If you did not have a problem
You would not have signed up
Just the fact that you are here
Proves that you screwed up

You can't go back to mommy
Your daddy cannot save you
You now belong to me
And this is all you'll ever be

From now on you are my toy
You see, you've joined a cult
That is what you did
And this is the result

[03:17] [instrumental]

If you did not have a problem
You would not have signed up
Just the fact that you are here
Proves that you screwed up

You can't go back to mommy
Your daddy cannot save you
You now belong to me
And that is all you'll ever be

From now on you are my toy
You see, you've joined a cult
That is what you did
And this is the result

You see, you've joined a cult
That is what you did
And this is the result

Yes, this is the result

[05:18] [outro]

Culting

I Wanna Big Banana
(c) J. Murdock McInnes Vasey


[intro]

I went to the store
I went to get bananas
They had the little ones
and the great big wanna wannas

wanna wanna wanna
I want a big banana
wanna wanna wanna
A honking big banana

I met a fellow there
He said that he had a banana
He had a big banana
A honking big banana

wanna wanna wanna
I want a big banana
wanna wanna wanna
A honking big banana

I asked him to come home
To come and meet my momma
wanna wanna wanna
Come and meet my momma

She said she liked bananas
The honking big banana
Returning to the store
I want my own banana

wanna wanna wanna
I want a big banana
wanna wanna wanna
A honking big banana

[instrumental]

wanna wanna wanna
I want a big banana
wanna wanna wanna
A honking big banana

You would not believe it
The price of the bananas
I don't know what to do
I need a big banana

Oh oh oh oh oh oh
I need a big banana
Oh oh oh oh oh oh
I need a big banana

I won't tell my momma
I need a big banana
wanna wanna wanna
I want a big banana

wanna wanna wanna
I want a big banana
wanna wanna wanna
A honking big banana

[outro]

I Wanna Big Banana (squeakier)

I write the lyrics; Mr. Alfonso Suno composes the music.  Working with the lovely Ms. Ai Ongaku, they create the arrangements.  Ms. Ongaku and her crowd are responsible for the performances.  My part in creating these tracks is very small. Nonetheless, I am to blame.  Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa.

To the Beach (B side)

I and Ai

Related tracks