i was too scared 
to fall in love 
to feel someone else’s touch 

all i heard 
wasn’t enough 
for you i fell so hard 

and that is why you’re so amazing
and that is why i feel frustrated 
and after all is set stone we’ll 
go on and regret nothing more

here i go now on my own
feeling lost and so alone it’s
what it is and was before 
nothings changed it’s you i’m leaning on

now it’s too late
to conjure up
the courage i felt so tough

i’m right there 
when you’re not
i shouldn’t have fell so hard
 
and that is why you’re so amazing
and that is why i feel frustrated 
and after all is set stone we’ll 
go on and regret nothing more

here i go now on my own
feeling lost and so alone it’s
what it is and was before 
nothings changed it’s you i’m leaning on

Nothings Changed

A song for the girl you can never quite reach but still can't forget

Ever On My Mind

An extended metaphor 

PC: Kat Vlasova  http://katvlasova.tumblr.com/

Darling

let’s pretend this sounds cool

an open letter to the ones who made me feel less, the ones who couldn't love me, and the ones who stepped on me in 2017. i am full of hope that 2018 will be filled with better human beings.

written, performed, and produced by holyveins

LYRICS:
maybe i should stay in bed all day
and hide away from the sun
it’s not like anyone wanted me anyway
although i wanted anyone

oh i thrive off your attention
but i know i’m just an extension
take me bit by bit, i’ll be a part of you
take me whole, i’ll try to be better for you

maybe i should stay down on the floor
and only come up when they call
i’ve only ever wanted to be more
i only wanted to grow tall

maybe i should stop putting myself down
for all of your stupid mistakes 
i’m tired of letting myself drown
cause i’m not the one to blame

oh i thrive off your attention
but i know i’m just an extension
you took me bit by bit, i’m not a part of you
you took me whole, i’m still not better for you

oh fuck you for making me feel so small
oh fuck you for making me feel so warm
i’m exhausted, exhausted of it all

oh fuck you for hanging me on the wall
fuck you for telling me i was wrong
i’m exhausted, exhausted of it all

Exhausted - Single

Exhausted

What Keeps Me Up

thanks to uma - @https://soundcloud.com/user-998191564 <3 
& to maiya suckling for cover art! <3

(verse)
Put your mouth away,
because your eyes they tell me more than your words ever could say,
and it's already breaking my heart,
just seeing you this way.
(chorus)
How can I be sure of my feelings when you're not around,
how can I know I'm doing it right I have so much self doubt,
how can we watch the leaves fall without the fear of time running out,
how did we learn to hold back our tears,
won't our insides drown?
(verse)
In the water when you look at yourself, 
who's reflection do you see?
I've been searching for answers in your eyes for so long,
I can't find them,
maybe it's just me.
(chorus)
How can I be sure of my feelings when you're not around,
how can I know I'm doing it right I have so much self doubt,
how can we watch the leaves fall without the fear of time running out,
how did we learn to hold back our tears,
won't our insides drown?
(bridge)
My knees are weak I feel I might fall down,
(My tears stain the bedsheets,)
I'm suffocating standing in this crowd,
(your blood it stains my rosy cheeks,) 
my knees are weak I feel I might fall down,
(how can I trust you when you're not true to yourself,)
I'm suffocating, I'm going to drown. 
(where have you gone?)
(outro)
When I woke up this morning I nearly forget your face,
when I woke up this morning I wanted to forget your face,
when I wake up tomorrow I hope I'm in a new headspace,
tie my shoelaces real tight and walk to a new place.

SELF DOUBT - feat. (the lovely)UMA

will you still love me tomorrow

Take Me

bubble gum (clairo cover)

Hello my dearest Soundcloud friends, 
Here is a song that I wrote and recorded in my Voice memos on the floor of a shower. I was in London, feeling vulnerable and lonely. I sent the song to one of my dearest friends Tahnee. It was only intended to be a draft but I told her that in the future I'd like to sing something like this with her.
She got back to me recently with a copy of the song that she had recorded harmonies, banjo and violin on. It made me cry with happiness and I wanted to share this with you. 
You can find Tahnee's Soundcloud and Spotify name under
 ~ Tahnee Ollerton ~
So please check her out if you haven't already. 
If you would like a copy of the lyrics let me know. 
All my love, 
Isabella X

What Keeps Me Up

Jakob Akira

Recent comments

kitty☆kai

lara

Related tracks