Plight of the Frankentweens (2025 Remaster)

"This is kind of a thematic sequel to a song from my album before this (Hot Take Fight to the Death!!) called 'You Think You're a Good Guy'. It's about people who consider themselves good and righteous and aren't self-aware enough to see their hypocrisy. The truth is that we're all capable of being good AND bad. None of us are above it, even if it's nice to think we are. People aren't black and white, we're gray. Which is more interesting anyway."

Lyrics:

He's racist but he thinks he's sensible
A white hood masked as amenable 
He's fighting an army of demons
Who can't drive

He's in the front row at the church house
He's handing a twenty to his kid now
He's taking the family to lunch
Where he won't tip

From the first time to the last
His aim true but his view is cracked
He faithful, he's a light
But he thinks he's always right
When gray, gray is in our blood
Can't be clean dragging in the mud
Gray, gray is in our blood
Gray is in our blood...

He loves her but it takes a lot of work
They put in the time but they can't learn
They give up and hit up Braum's
Order and pray, burgers and shakes

Used to get down to rock and roll 
Now it's ibuprofen and Lansoprazole
A good night ends at 9:45

(repeat chorus)

Gray Is In Our Blood

"This is a sci-fi song about alien abduction. It has some gruesome imagery that was fun to write but I never know if it's disturbing to listen to. I wrote this in either 2017 or 2018 during a strange time in America where it felt like evil aliens were infiltrating everything and I'm sure that feeling was part of the inspiration. That feeling that you've been taken over by an enemy and there's nothing you can do about it. It's sad and defeating but you hope others can find their way to something better."


Lyrics:

Orbiting the coast
The rockets are firing
Cruising in low
The view is inspiring

Oh! Oh no!
I'm choking on smoke!

A drill in my head
An alien dizziness
Are we all dead?
Adaptive existences...

Did I digest?!
I'm caught in a nest!

I've been pulled into
Automatic doom
They got to you
But how'd they make it through?
"We're as true as separated glue"
Pulled into automatic doom...

I bust out my pod
I'm covered in mucus juice
Crawl on the floor
I zoom like a crippled goose

LOUD ALARM
What am I gonna do...

The doors slide up
A vacuum-sealing sound
Footsteps rush in
The butts of blasters pound

BAM BAM BAM
I've been subdued...

(repeat chorus)

If this is it
Don't tell my family I died in spit
If this is all there is
I hope good wins in the end

I hope the others find their way back
I hope the others find their way back
I hope the others find their way back
I hope the others find their way back

Automatic Doom

"One of my most frequent song topics is songwriting itself. I'm fascinated with the relationship between an artist and a listener. It can be friendly but there's a distance. If you're the person singing you're playing a role in the listener's imagination in a way. You aren't you, you're a character, if you're doing your job right. In other circumstances you wouldn't want people to project their feelings and thoughts onto you but in this one that's almost point. They think you're someone else and that has meaning to them and it's not accurate but that's not your problem. Being a blank slate for them is good in a way. Not that you'd have the same relationship with your actual friends and family.

It's just strange to think about songs and what they mean. They're this short bit of words and chords and melodies and they become the way you connect with some people. They're a conduit and you can't control how the listener will interpret them and you kind of have to just make peace with whatever they hear in the songs, even if it's far from what it means to you. It's just a weird place to be in in my opinion. I've been doing this for around twenty-five years and I still don't understand the magic of it. Yeah. I bet that's the kind of headspace I was in when I wrote this."

Lyrics:

Song after song
Chord after chord
topic to topic
Floored to bored
I wanna shake it up
This muse-y luck
Take it to the limit
For your pickup truck

Scratching the record
Flipping the single
Ordering thoughts
Just to give 'em a tingle
It shouldn't work
So why do they twerk?
I'm no dancer
I'm just here to lurk (but)

Let's go outside
Where we've been, right?
Let's blow right by
The strange pain inside
Don't wanna dwell on
all the hell or
Kiss and tell on
Where Heaven fell more

Poem on fire
Performance on wire
Singing to strings
Pull 'em out with a plier
Give 'em a kick
Use the heaviest pick
Play it for some chick
Try to make her sick

Or I'm a good guy!
... sometimes
I'm a full-time
Daytime nightlight 
I'm a party
In your house
I'm your greatest
Dream guy spouse (or)

(repeat chorus)

You know what you want from me
So take it so I'll feel right please
You know what you want from me
So take it so I'll feel right please

(repeat chorus)

Poem on Fire

"One day when I was trying to write a song a friend texted me a picture of his angry-looking son and my immediate thought was, 'That kid's pissed'. Then my songwriter brain took over and ran with the title. It's nice to have sweet, sentimental songs about how much you love a kid but I thought it was more interesting to explore the other side, when they're being a brat and a little tyrant but you know you love them anyway. 

I didn't write this song about my nephew but I think of him when I sing or hear it. To be clear, he is NOT an angry problem child like the one in the song but he did used to laugh and punch me in the... Uh, nevermind."

Lyrics:

Plastic guys flyin'
High-pitched cryin'
Didn't get a nap in
Now the boy is slappin'
Laughin' at your pain
Drivin' in the rain
Now he fell asleep
Wigglin' his baby teeth

Kid's pissed
He's throwing fits
Other day, man, I swear I heard him hiss
Never thankful
Never grateful
Kinda wish he'd never left his baby cradle

Angel boy zonked out
Don't you make a sound
Little heart's tender
My man plan ender
Hungry as a ferret
Spittin' out a carrot
Better get my bib on
Otherwise I'm gonna wear it!

(repeat chorus)

I love this tiny psycho
But I'm still scared
He punched me in the stomach
But I still care
He's screaming like a banshee
He don't know what he means to me
Of all the kids under the sun
He is my wildest one

(repeat chorus)

Kid's Pissed

"My main memory of writing this song was literally finding my Harry Potter books in an old box and flipping through them and being reminded of how magical they were to read. This is a song about being introverted and wanting to shut the door and do your own thing. I probably put it first on the album because that's what I have to do to make albums. They require so so so much alone time. Maybe I was setting the scene in a way."

Lyrics:

Pulled some books out of an old box
Pages were yellow but they still talk
Brought some memories back, I must say
Of sneaking away to let my mind play

I'm in love with the written word
Nothing's better than going full nerd
I'm obsessed with the other lands
I'm all notecards and rubber bands

I'm a fake plane
I'm on holiday
Do not disturb
I cannot verb
I'm no good
I'd put down my foot
But I can't move
And it can't improve

That's the gist of my paralysis
That's the runaway my friends miss
I'm just starring at my paper drug
Like a werewolf but instead a slug

I'm a human but the still type
If they time-lapsed from day to night
I'd be frozen in my easy chair
Some things in life are not fair

(repeat chorus)

I'm a statue just here to inhale
I don't output, I just suck and set sail
I'm a body preparing for the slab
Doing 80 to do 0 to live fab

(repeat chorus)

Do Not Disturb

Frankentweens 2025 Remaster Intro

Honesty

I'm a songwriter/attempting screenwriter living in Fort Worth, Texas. I wanted to do a podcast but figure it out as I go. Hope you enjoy!   - Jeff

Kid's Pissed

Jeff Grant

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