(Is this real life? or am I on theme again?)

Artwork by @ nyctophiliacmb ❤️

Lyrics:

I remember your voice.
I was young, 24.
Saw my heart on the floor
and I layed there in case you'd pick it up.
Passing time,
had to say my goodbyes
and all my alibis
cause I knew that you would show up.

Don't you just hate it?
It's like we never left and I just can't help it.
And I can't explain it,
after all this time, I'd still say it.

Cause I've gotten so much more
from standing outside your door
than staying on my own
and I'll pay for it, cause you'll be moving on.
I'll go home,
hit the lights, I was wrong
cause I knew all along
that I loved you like never before.

I remember your smile,
TV shows around 9,
think 'bout you day and night,
my forever tied to your aftermath.
Fast forward,
feeling like going nowhere
and I'll see you somewhere, 
always running down your path.

Don't you just hate it?
It's like we never left and I just can't help it.
And I can't explain it,
after all this time, I'm right here saying it.

Cause I've gotten so much more
from standing outside your door
than staying on my own
and I'll pay for it, cause you'll be moving on.
I'll go home,
hit the lights, I was wrong
cause I knew all along
that I loved you like never before.

So go on and just say it,
everything changed and I'll get it.
I'll bury these words, I'll try to escape it,
don't you just hate it?

Cause I've gotten so much more
from standing outside your door
than staying on my own
and I hate it, cause you'll be moving on.
I'll go home,
hit the lights, I was wrong
cause I knew all along
that I loved you like never before.

And I hate it...
And I hate it... like never before.

don't you just hate it?

"Hit The Lights" (#370, 200703)

I can't wait much longer out here on my own
'Til my hands surrender and feet bring me back home
Swore that I could take it I was never givin' up
Didn't take too long to see that I'm all outta' luck

Hit the lights and cue the water works
Watch the world go by like no one knows it hurts
There's freedom somewhere out there but I'm stayin' in tonight
So before you shut the door on me go on hit the lights

To love you drove me crazy to leave you broke my heart
Guess I thought you'd save me but I made it pretty hard
Last words you spoke to me still ringin' in my mind
Never stay so long that you can't leave it all behind

Hit the lights and cue the water works
Watch the world go by like no one knows it hurts
There's freedom somewhere out there but I'm stayin' in tonight
So before you shut the door on me go on hit the lights

Maybe you'll regret it but I kinda' think you won't
You don't seem to miss me and I probably shoulda' known
That I'd stay stuck this way I don't know what else to do
But that ain't you

Week 27 - Hit The Lights (200703)

I don't think we're gonna make it
Think the billionaires will take us 
off the precipice
We're sliding off the edge of it
And though I'd love to change it
How's an ant derail a train
I'm insignificant
Or is that what I'm meant to think?
So

No need for conflict now 
cause no-one’s gonna make it
No safer spaces now that 
no-one’s getting out this alive
Stare in your loved ones’ eyes cause  
every moment’s sacred
Squeeze every hand so tight and 
wait while the aPOCalypse arrives
Cause no-one’s getting out of this alive

I don't think we're gonna make it
I’ve been trying not to face it for the longest time
Always at the back of my mind
Bitter is taste
It’s all so pointless, such a waste
It’s so avoidable - 
if human life was just affordable
But

No need for conflict now 
cause no-one’s gonna make it
No safer spaces now that 
no-one’s getting out this alive
Tears in your loved ones’ eyes and 
every moment’s sacred
Squeeze all their hands so tight and 
wait until the after-life arrives
Cause no-one’s getting out of this alive

How could I lead you to this place
Only to leave without a trace 
of hope, without a call to arms?
Baby, I just need you to be strong 
and carry on
Or come despair with me and feel the eerie calm

I don’t think we’re gonna make it,
I think the billionaires will break it
Fuck the future up
For a little more of way too much
So WRONG it's almost funny
Cause the little extra money's insignificant,
to them, 
Still they SNUFF out every chance again

No need for conflict now 
cause no-one’s gonna make it
No safer spaces now that 
no-one’s getting out this alive
Stare in your loved ones’ eyes cause  
every moment’s sacred
Squeeze every hand so tight and 
wait while the apocalypse arrives
Cause no-one’s getting out of here alive

I Dont Think Were Gonna Make It

Copyright 2020
All Rights Reserved

Lyrics & Music: Erin Wolf
Guitar & Vocals: Erin Wolf
Photo credit: Jennifer Groth 
(Photo description: James, Erin, and Ryan back in the day, sometime between '06-'07, ready to rock out at some event we made the music at in Oconomowoc, WI)

james
i know you probably don't remember
how we met in the summer of '03
we met in the woods
in the middle of wisconsin
a far cry from your roots in boston

you didn't say much
lest music was involved
then you jumped right in 
and you evolved
strumming your guitar
or beating the drums
clearly this is what you loved

we were outside
a small town called wautoma
used to be known as webb
now it's called camp lakotah
singing by the campfire
swimming in the lake
that's the story
of how i met james

james
look how far we've come
after all the years and all you've done
you started song-a-week
you welcomed people in
i'm so proud of you
my friend

and to think
we were outside
a small town called wautoma
used to be known as webb
now it's called camp lakotah
singing by the campfire
swimming in the lake
that's the story
of how i met james

we were outside a small town
little place called wautoma
used to be known as webb
now it's called camp lakotah
singing by the campfire
swimming in the lake
that's the story
of how i met james

James

I wrote Departures [https://soundcloud.com/kent-aitken-386794022/departures-song-a-week-2020-week-4] when I was setting up to move; I'm book-ending it with this the day before I head home for the summer. Erin [https://soundcloud.com/erinwolf] was right; I think I have travel on my mind.

*****

When we are tired
And need to lay down
Count time to the tide
Come back to this place

When we are older
Bring me to the water
Set time all aside
Back where I was born

Bring me home, to tie it together
When memory is worn

At the end of the evening
At the end of the warm night
Bright with my brothers
And the families they made

Where our mother is buried
We water the flowers
Somehow they grow
When we're far away

I like to think they need our attention
Even when we only make it home rarely

Bring me home, to tie it together
When memory is worn

With a sigh
For the seasons and lives that pass by

When I am ready
Bring me to the water

The Water - Song a Week 2020, Week 29

"With A Sigh" (#374, 200717)

Not every story can sound like a fairy tale
Sometimes the lovers don't love in the end
Not every promise lasts but I believe anyway
Somehow someday that I'll see you again

We couldn't have guessed
But nevertheless
I sing to the wind
As the raindrops roll off my skin

With a sigh and a kiss as the train leaves the station
I know I'm gonna' miss you it's hard to be patient
While the hands on the clock and the seasons are changin'
But me and my kiss we will be right here waitin' with a sigh

Maybe it's early a little too soon to tell
Or maybe I'm late how would I know
Pick me a rose and I'll pick you a daffodil
Before they all freeze under the snow

You brought me to life
Totally opened my eyes
Left hours ago
But I'm never letting you go

Week 29b - With A Sigh (200717)

"Longest Road You'll Ever Walk" (#355-375, 200505-200717)

Co-written with Chris Wyatt.

Artwork by "beguima", two sisters and a brother from Barcelona: www.society6.com/guillemvillaro

She swore she would never leave you
But here you are all alone
Nothin' more than a memory
And no strength to carry on

You moved mountains to have her
Damn near 1500 miles
That all crumbled when she left you
In the middle of the night

After seven years together it finally fell apart
Coulda' seen it comin' you weren't listenin' at all
It's a lonely highway from your head to your heart
The longest road you'll ever walk

If you knew that it was over
Could have kissed her one last time
Begged for one more sunrise
Tried to change her mind

Here you are with all the pieces
Scattered all around the room
Trying hard to find a reason
God I hope you find it soon

Lookin' back now it's clear I couldn't tell
Ain't no sense to sit here talkin' to myself
Need to face it I'm losin' my best friend
And I'd do it all again

Week 29a - Longest Road You’ll Ever Walk (200717)

"Don't Threaten Me" (#378, 200719)

Seems like today everything's a competition
From money and careers to huntin' and fishin'
If you're comin' after me I got a warning for you
When my back's against the wall I know exactly what to do

So don't threaten me because I'll kill you with kindness
Tell dad jokes 'til you're laughin', hug you 'til you're cryin'
As soon as you think I'm about to let up
I'll say somethin' sweet and you'll feel like a million bucks

Everybody wants to be a big deal
Top dog big cheese king of the hill
Doesn't seem to last though when we step on each other
So check it out if you come at me you'll see my true colors

Oh don't threaten me man I'll kill you with kindness
Tell dad jokes 'til you're laughin', hug you 'til you're cryin'
As soon as you think I'm about to let up
I'll say somethin' sweet and you'll feel like a million bucks

Here's an idea what if we work together
And rise above the rest in any kinda' weather
Show 'em how it's done they might learn a thing or two
But if not I'm gonna' tell 'em the same thing I told you

Week 30b - Don’t Threaten Me (200719)

Copyright 2020
All Rights Reserved

Lyrics & Music: Erin Wolf
Guitar & Vocals: Erin Wolf

This is a follow-up of sorts from my 2019 offering, "Hold Her for You" (https://soundcloud.com/erinwolf/hold-her-for-you), which was written following the death of my friend, Nick, in October 2019. Grief is a weird and complex companion. 

nine months you've been gone
somehow life keeps moving on
thunder and sun
i can hear one

5-4-3-2-1
that refrains still goes on
i kept my word and i still do
holding her for you
holding her for you

tonight tears run down my face
i can feel your spirit in this place
you don't threaten me
if anything, with you, i find peace
if anything, i find peace

i know that you 
are beyond the veil
that i'm not yet meant to cross

i know that you
you are home

Nine Months In...

I took a couple of weeks because I was kinda losing my mind but this is what came out of it, anyways PART II

Lyrics:

I woke up without you by my side,
I tried to fill the echo in my mind.
I couldn't make sense of feeling alright,
so I didn't for a while.

I spent the days on my own
talking to all these people I don't know.
Grasping the fact that maybe I was gone,
but I'm not anymore.

(I need to)
Stop lying to my face,
nobody died from a heartbreak.
You said I'd be ok,
it took me a while but now I understand.
I don't need to love you or hurt you to feel alive,
so now I just feel alright.

I drank a little too much wine last night,
and for the first time you didn't come to my mind.
Couldn't make sense of moving on,
but I did it, just so you know.

Now I don't need to run from your ghost
or from your favorite song of mine on the phone.
I almost forgot the sound of your voice,
and I will after all.

(I'm glad you)
Stopped lying to my face,
nobody died from a heartbreak.
You said I'd be ok,
it took me some scars but now I understand.
I don't need to love you or hurt you to feel alive,
so now I just...

I almost forgot the sound of your voice,
nobody died from letting you go.

You said I'd be ok,
it took all in me but now I understand.
I don't need to love or hurt you to feel alive,
so now I just feel alright.

Feel Alright

Don't look away
Forget all the fire

Hold me on the way home
The cross won't count for nothing

I didn't want to be one
Laying all the way down
Keeping all the words in
Letting all the ghosts out

Don't walk away
Every time you're tired

Forget all the phone calls
Let's make it count for something

I didn't want to be one
Laying all the way down
Keeping all the words in
Letting all the ghosts out

So forget what I said
About leaving it behind

I didn't want to be one
I didn't want to be the one

There's a million singing that
And there's a million shouting back
It's either none
Or a million and one

I didn't want to be one
Laying all the way down
Keeping all the words in
Letting all the ghosts out

So forget what I said
About leaving it behind

I didn't want to be one
I didn't want to be the one

I didn't want to be one
I didn't want to say yes
I didn't want to be one
I couldn't let there be less

(then Kiwi barks softly)

Million and One - Song a Week 2020, Week 30

Nashville songwriter and multi-instrumentalist, Godin Guitars Official Artist and Founder of www.songaweek.org.

His catalog of 500+ titles includes collaborations with hit writers Mark Narmore, Elliott Park, Steve Dean, and Pete & Pat Luboff, among others internationally from England to Australia.

Redding's music has landed cuts by numerous recording artists including Dan Whitehouse, Emma Gale, and David Easterling.

Week 27 - Hit The Lights (200703)

James Tristan Redding