this might b my best one :)
prod/mix: me
+ https://soundcloud.com/770asd

incantation +d9mir (jons)

brighter days

du du deedee dee du
prod my slime https://soundcloud.com/d9mir

do you think youre better off alone
do you think youre better on your own
do you think its better if i go
do you ever think of me at all
now im bitter, she fucking left me for him
dont fucking get her, and now i see her saying
oh my god look at what he got 
this is so fucked up 
but im still in love
hate flares as i stare at reflections
dont care bout whatever this mess is
i guess that its funny to test me
she says she loves me but she doesnt text me

oh i
you look better when you cry
youll look better when you die
in the middle of the night
now youre with some other guy
and im still here wondering why
im defeated and i sigh
and i ask one question

do you think youre better off alone
do you think youre better on your own
do you think its better if i go
do you ever think of me at all

jonsgov moment

better off alone

comatose

:(((
https://open.spotify.com/track/6Wduv5auHRILXlCcyCbBMS?si=0cbce93bb94041dc
prod https://soundcloud.com/shishyshishy <3

guess you were the mean girl
type to leave me on seen girl
i don’t care what you say
we were only sixteen girl
i don’t know why i feel hurt
never liked me anyway
you just take me for a bad kid
such a bore, such a sad kid
rot away in your acid
you would always test me
still i wonder why you left me
im here melting away, hey
guess you are the mean girl

still you’re living in a dream world

guess you are the mean girl
all the damage you deal girl
now my heart’s needing crutches and i’m turning seethrough
as a ghost i wont leave you
you’re awful i love you, awful i love you
and i don’t believe you
when you say that you feel too
cause you don’t need to
i bathe in your evil
im melting away, hey
guess you are the mean girl

still you’re living in your mean world

guess you are the mean girl

still you’re living in a dream world

mean girl (shishy)

like comment subscribe
prod https://soundcloud.com/shishy77 + https://soundcloud.com/prodsoulsss

she's just an apparition
i'll play the cards i'm given,
skin still itching.
(uh) keep living,
how come when im still kicking,
im the villain?
evil, woah, villain
she don't know, villain

and i look in her eyes
and i just see a lie,
see the ghost of a smile
while i'm watching her cry, wondering why
nothing to live for, nowhere to die
look at the sky, stars in a flight
i just want love, guess it isn't my time

she's just an apparition
i'll play the cards i'm given,
skin still itching.
(uh) keep living,
how come when im still kicking,
im the villain?
evil, woah, villain
she don't know, villain

i guess im the villain
gotta build my resistance
its a haunting existence
cause im the villain

evil, woah, villain
she don't know, villain

villain

villain (shishy/souls)

+ https://soundcloud.com/caponeti
prod: https://soundcloud.com/diligencexs
cool song :)

call when u want to
look at the contacts cause i want u
its all i want, that u come through
love makes a comeback when u call soon
take the zoloft so it wont come crashing down
make it harder when u call not happy now
see u coming and i still cant stand my ground
passing out

phone call w/ caponeti (diligence)

prod https://soundcloud.com/diligencexs + https://soundcloud.com/ev333

lyrics:
all the other boys yeah they want you
never hear your voice but i want to
guess i better poise but i walk through 
trying to avoid you, trying to avoid you, try to avoid you
 
hide my face in the hallways
i dont mind that im not really doing great
i avoid you always
i dont mind cause i do it to keep me safe
i dont like when you call me
try to hide but its not really working great
i avoid you always
i dont mind being patient i can wait

i feel like a ghost
though i love you the most
dont know how to get close though
i hide in my phone
unapproachable girl
but her number i know
and its saved under my love
but it never shows
but i just wanna hold her till the morning
and every time my soul hurts when her phone rings
i just wanna know her but i dont think
she will ever show, girl, that you want me

all the other boys yeah they want you
never hear your voice but i want to
guess i better poise but i walk through 
trying to avoid you, trying to avoid you, try to avoid you
 
hide my face in the hallways
i dont mind that im not really doing great
i avoid you always
i dont mind cause i do it to keep me safe
i dont like when you call me
try to hide but its not really working great
i avoid you always
i dont mind being patient i can wait

avoid you (diligence/ev333)

my most painful song
+ https://soundcloud.com/hiseph
prod: https://soundcloud.com/kyur0 + https://soundcloud.com/troiner

we share a lot on the rooftops
thinking that you care a lot but you do not
guess it isnt fair but whats in the toolbox
i just wanna bare my arm put a knife in a new spot
scare myself when im near her
i just wanna paint her face in my blood on the mirror
there, i guess, put it clearer
i just wanna cut my arms feel it gush and i shiver

i stare a lot from the rooftop
blow my fucking roof off
grinning at my double barrel shotgun
tear at all of the cuts on
skin im drawing blood from
scratching off my scabs like im rotten

cuts w/ seph (kyuro/troiner)

youre not the hero
+ https://soundcloud.com/pos3r
prod: https://soundcloud.com/kyur0 + https://soundcloud.com/prodsoma + https://soundcloud.com/inno1k

(and your face is fake, anyway, not a thing i can say, its a give and take, everyday, who do you think youll save?)
you really think youre a hero
when youre just stuck in the middle?
and you tell me that im brittle
when your affection is fickle.
youre not the hero
youre not the hero
its pretty simple
its pretty simple
look in the mirror
look in the mirror
thats not a hero, youre not a hero

https://soundcloud.com/pos3r
youre not that special
dont know who told you you were
told me that we couldnt work
i thought it couldnt get worse, my heads spinning in a circle
you can call me what you want but you cannot call me a liar
im so sick of being sick and im so tired of being tired
once you stare right at the sun and make your body catch on fire
i just couldnt take anymore, need to retire
(my head spinning in a circle, dont know who told you you were)

you really think youre a hero
when youre just stuck in the middle?
and you tell me that im brittle
when your affection is fickle.
youre not the hero
youre not the hero
its pretty simple
its pretty simple
look in the mirror
look in the mirror
thats not a hero, youre not a hero
can you save me though 
when im lost on the way, please woah
counting the days to go
i been starting to fade alone
nothings okay
im not the same
im out here dancing alone in the rain
always to blame
guess its the case
im not the person i was yesterday

hero w/ loveyouparadise (kyuro/soma/inno)

true to my feelings, true to life
prod: https://soundcloud.com/ev333

lyrics:
im nervous
youre nervous too
had a taste of the love when i fell for you
im hurting 
youre hurting too
its okay but its not but i play it cool
we met in march and we went till september
played all my cards couldnt hold it together
maybe the part that i want to remember
just aint the heartbreak i have in december
cold in december
snow in december
yeah im alone but i guess its whatever
wrote you a letter
ties that i sever
yeah im alone on my own in december

and when the cold comes
(and youre not there)
i just feel woeful
(what do you care)
tears turn to snowfall
(and you just stare)
cause i know that you wont call
crying to snowfall
never been hopeful
honestly dont call
dont know me at all
this the last straw
stone cold you laugh hard
think of the past ill
do it to myself

im nervous
youre nervous too
had a taste of the love when i fell for you
im hurting 
youre hurting too
its okay but its not but i play it cool
we met in march and we went till september
played all my cards couldnt hold it together
maybe the part that i want to remember
just aint the heartbreak i have in december
cold in december
snow in december
yeah im alone but i guess its whatever
wrote you a letter
ties that i sever
yeah im alone on my own in december

snowfall (ev333)

it was you for so long
prod https://soundcloud.com/shishy77 + https://soundcloud.com/diligencexs

my face, your face, home screen
youre a bitch, think you do
you dont know me
i wait, insane, slowly
i dont care you dont care cause im lonely

part of december
i learned a valuable lesson
dont get attached to the person 
you think will help you progress and
i cannot handle the messages 
guess ill pass never settle this
guess ill stop with the texting 
and guess ill stop with the begging
cry , watch the tears fall down
why do i cry cause its over now
hide, we were falling out
why do i hide when it all goes down

my face, your face, home screen
youre a bitch, think you do
you dont know me
i wait, insane, slowly
i dont care you dont care cause im lonely
(x2)

you dont care at all
wannna watch you fall
was i not enough
my face, your face, my home screen

home screen (shishy/diligence)

click click picture
prod https://soundcloud.com/3xogmel + https://soundcloud.com/ev333

ive been looking through the camera
show the best of you
you been burning on my retina
im an afterthought
i been trying not to mess it up
going after you
i been thinking that im better off
with a shattered heart
(x2)
 
(click click) thats a headshot, photograph
keep taking pictures cause i know thisll never last
you were the better half 
i didnt stand a chance
you were the one who stole the show, made me shatter fast
i look at my own reflection
no wonder shes never texted
i see what keeps me from getting
all of the love that i need
im in the dark keep me guessing
im never one for the lessons
cause i just keep on forgetting
how theyre applying to me
 
ive been looking through the camera
show the best of ya
you been burning on my retina
im an afterthought
i been trying not to mess it up
going after ya
i been thinking that im better off
with a shattered heart
(x2)

camera (3x/ev333)

https://soundcloud.com/kuriositylol
prod https://soundcloud.com/benjithemachine

it was back in high school
i wanted to ask you
if i played my cards right
do i get to text you?
didnt have the time to 
tell you that i want you
problem is my heart might
shut off and reject you

fuck off, i dont miss you
my love is an issue
all i want is to kiss you
fuck me up, cutting right through the tissue
fuck off, i dont miss you
enough, i wont listen
the scars on my skin hurt
the blood, cutting right through the tissue

tissue w/ kuriosity (benjithemachine)

trying my very hardest but it's never enough
@vertigoth
prod @shishy77

you took it all away
this can never be what it was, its not the same
still but a call away
never said that i didnt love you, every day

you did me wrong and ill take the blame
now every drop of the rain's the same
now i know you took it all away
and i hope that you know
know i only wanted to make you stay

never wanted to go so bad, oh no
just leave the past in the past and please dont go
its so hard to approach, so far to go,
youre always fast, and im so slow

and i know its hard, i dont blame you
you know you are what i pertain to
i will stay, guess its something about you
i cant say if ill settle without you
---
and my blood still stained on the keyboard
I'll never peek so just check at the backdoor
and with all that I can and I please
so please don't tell me that u wish it were different cuz I'll be down on my knees

say you'd be down for the winter
I couldn't think of the past
u slid beneath my skin
fragments they splinter in half
and the leaves still fall, give life when stuck to my sweater
once just a schoolboy's crush, and now I picture forever :')

Love, as we let it be
I can't lose touch, ur apart of me
I sing these songs from my chest
checking the screen for the weather
you float upwards of my flaws
my blaze as light as a feather

I know that it hurts when in motion
when confusion evokes from emotion
when I struggle to look u in ur eyes
and I can't cope with the thought of goodbyes :(

goodbyes w/ verti (shishy)

here come the tears in my eyes, you defeat me.

show some love to my friend and producer of dis song :) https://soundcloud.com/shishy77

(again and again and again x2)
again and again and again
a summer love turning autumn friend
again and again and again
the sun's been up but i'm still in bed
getting used to the pain isn't easy
so i weep with my mattress beneath me
this has happened to me and it won't be the end
cause it happens again and again and again

(i know you, you know me
i hope you, you dont lea-)
but i know it all too well,
i can see the pain in your eyes when you see me
nothing that i can't tell
so here come the tears in my eyes, you defeat me
i can't make you stay but you promised
guessing its too late but i called it
i thought this was love but it wasn't
guessing its my fault i am nauseous

again and again and again
a summer love turning autumn friend
again and again and again
the sun's been up but i'm still in bed
getting used to the pain isn't easy
so i weep with my mattress beneath me
this has happened to me and it wont be the end
cause it happens again and again and again

again (shishy)

nothing becomes easier, that much is clear.

https://soundcloud.com/hiseph
prod https://soundcloud.com/diligencexs + https://soundcloud.com/sprr00w

i just want you to know
i don't love you no more
how many calls on the phone
what'll it take for you to go
how many calls, how many talks, how many more now?
how many weeks, how many months, when do you run out?
baby i always regret letting you go now
and i keep coming back, i don't know how

how many more
i dont know if it's over
what do you want?
i don't know but
i just want you to go, love

[ https://soundcloud.com/hiseph ]
shit really ain't what it seems
i got too much on my shoulders
i swear you're invested in me
but you got me pushing these boulders
got money all up in my jeans
pick up the phone
i want this to be over
i'm tryna turn over a leaf
shawty got four sides like a clover

i think you talk alot
she gon grab my heart 
and tear it all apart
don't know what you want from me
leave me out to rot
i try, alot
but i can't talk it out

how many calls, how many talks, how many more now?
how many weeks, how many months, when do you run out?
baby i always regret letting you go now
and i keep coming back, i don't know how

how many more
i dont know if it's over
what do you want?
i don't know but
i just want you to go, love

go, love w/ seph (diligence/sparr00w)

prod by the best: https://soundcloud.com/newgarasu + https://soundcloud.com/recyclexbin
extension + additional production: me

take a picture, its a thousand different words
hundred kisses i dont miss her but it hurts
if she wants it then i got it
if she wants it then i got it
if she wants it then i got it
i dont miss her but it hurts
and the distance is a blessing and a curse
dont know how i wouldve pictured this whole thing to ever work
and now ive got bigger problems
and now its a different process
and now ive shown bigger progress
i dont miss her and it hurts
i dont miss her and it hurts

im moving on to another girl
hey, hi, hello to another girl
im on the phone to another girl
its another world, for the better, girl
and i buy her the things that she wants, i dont care what the cost is
and i buy her the ring that she wants, i dont care when its loving
and i cry on my own, when i am alone
so i hide in the phone, i type in the code, i write in the notes

take a picture, its a thousand different words
hundred kisses i dont miss her but it hurts
if she wants it then i got it
if she wants it then i got it
if she wants it then i got it
i dont miss her but it hurts
and the distance is a blessing and a curse
dont know how i wouldve pictured this whole thing to ever work
and now ive got bigger problems
and now its a different process
and now ive shown bigger progress
i dont miss her and it hurts
i dont miss her and it hurts

picture

you put the colour into my skin, now i'll take it away once and for all
https://soundcloud.com/jonsve
https://soundcloud.com/owtiss
prod. https://soundcloud.com/lovefelt + https://soundcloud.com/y4ndere

and i cry in the mirror, hide in the rain
dry my eyes, see it clearer, mind is a pain
and i talk to the image, talk to my brain
and i walk 'til i'm with her, walk to my grave

look me in the eyes, i don't wanna see you crying!
used to fantasize, thought about how i'd be dying
it's this flaw of mine, don't think it was worthless trying
i don't have the time, never had it, nevermind it [x2]

[ https://soundcloud.com/owtiss ]
i'm a liar, suicider
i go through this all the time
her eyes locked to mine
wish you were a little kinder
this fight isn't mine so why should i fight her?
look me in the eye, i don't wanna be a liar
it's ok, i know that i'll be fine
i go through this all the time
please don't ever cry
try my best to read between the lines
am i the one you like?
i can't help sate your desires

look me in the eyes, i don't wanna see you crying!
used to fantasize, thought about how i'd be dying
it's this flaw of mine, don't think it was worthless trying
i don't have the time, never had it, nevermind it [x2]

eyes w/ owtiss (lovefelt/yandere)

back to it
prod me

i can see the pain in your eyes
promise i can feel it too
i don't have a way to describe
everything you put me through
washing all the blood to the gutter
i still love her
after everything you're still you
and the guts of a lover
i'm a cutter
cause i never seen a way past you

you'd think i'd know much better
looks like i knew nothing at all
here's all of me, eight letters
i love you, i love you
cause i'm right back at the start
playing with the same set of cards
you know them all, 
my heart, you own it all
it never ends, 'too close to call'
i know how this one ends, cause i've seen it
you don't ever feel the need to apologize
and i fall into pieces
let you through to deceive this heart of mine

i can see the pain in your eyes
promise i can feel it too
i don't have a way to describe
everything you put me through
washing all the blood to the gutter
i still love her
after everything you're still you
and the guts of a lover
i'm a cutter
cause i never seen a way past you
x2

gutter

produced by @pw4prez + @makemeapromise
featuring @hiseph

lyrics
@jonsve
watch me miss her through every winter
it's never ending and i'm finished 
every december i get to penning
and i'm writing letters i'm never sending
i try but it's a rite of passage
i'm always telling but never acting

walking out the door, and of course
it is haunting to the core, because i'm yours
set the stage and the decor, take the floor
fake the face to hide the pages of my heart
the blood that gushes, love that rushes, it's all for you
the flaw in loving is wanting nothing if not for you
this good-for-nothing that i'm becoming, can't pay my dues
the rush of cutting because it's crushing the pain of you

@hiseph
i do what i can now, you had it planned out
the way you talk about me it's like you dont understand now
i knew you from 2 decembers, you changed the weather, ripped my heart out
can't be together, everything you say, i throw it all out
you call me tryna say "what's up?", you know i call your bluff
everything's just not enough, you're onto better stuff
can't change the weather, my heart gon tear up til it falls out
wrote you a letter, you not gon read it til we fall out

[chorus]

all for you w/ seph (surgeon/sochi)

prod me. lyrics below.

isnt it my fault, that i said what i said when
you don't wanna call, give your side of the past ten days
and i'm all ears baby, just a last chance
really wanna make it right, this is not okay
and i'm all yours baby, there's a place in my heart
and i'm always drawn to the worst set of cards
cause i'm always trying to become what i'm not
cause i'm always trying to become what you want

i'll be the scapegoat for everything
baby put the blame on me, every bit
and i'll change what i need to become what you need now
in a cage and i bleed, you're the one with the keys now
there's a place in my dreams we can meet when you reach out
will you take what you need, cause i see that i need you
i need you bad, more than that, i need you back,
i've been a mess, you knew that, and still you left
do you think about me, way i'm thinking about you?
do you sink without me, way i'm sinking without you?
do you talk about me, way i'm running my mouth too, 
cause you're all i amount to, am i out for the count too?

isnt it my fault, that i said what i said when
you don't wanna call, give your side of the past ten days
and i'm all ears baby, just a last chance
really wanna make it right, this is not okay
and i'm all yours baby, there's a place in my heart
and i'm always drawn to the worst set of cards
cause i'm always trying to become what i'm not
cause i'm always trying to become what you want
[x2]

jons

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