A small musical play within the length of a song, sung with my son and daughter

It's Ok Dad I've Got This One

"Child In Me" (written by Kiyomi)

I found myself in a place away from now, it was when
I was driving, guess I was crying for the first time in a while
I was but a child when I knew fear, so I clung to your hand
But when I turned back, you'd vanished and the next time we were strangers
I guess there's still a child in me
And the child in me still remembers
I'd only ever known to breathe, just enough to be ok
The emptiness keeps coming back
Just when I'd thought I'd chased it all,
My fears away, my tears away

So I ask why this comfort, I feel in tears?
I'd try to run to you, cuz loneliness I'd known for all these years
I am but a child in a world with much yet to be revealed
With my heart out and in comfort, I will be filled with the years
So did i run to you? yes I did
Seems there's always a child in me
And it may be that I can ease,
My fears away, my tears away

So did i run to you? yes I did
Seems there's always a child in me
And it may be that I can ease,
My fears away, my tears away


Child In Me

"Blue Eyes" (written by Kiyomi)

At times when I'm sitting by myself like now
I start to feel a little scared, a little teary-eyed, unsure
My mind starts to run in circles and I start to wonder why
Why so suddenly my fears my tears my dear, what is the reason?

But then I find I have to question a contemplating mind
What would a world be without some fears, some tears, and my dear
A dusty heart trying to keep beating in a gray world, it'd be
All of this going on inside me's got me going kinda crazy

Chorus:
But there's something in your blues eyes, something in your blue eyes
I couldn't run away if I tried, somehow I know that it's alright
Cuz there's something in your blue eyes, in your blue eyes

So when I'm sitting here by myself like now
And I start to feel a little scared, a little teary-eyed, unsure
I know it in my heart I feel this all because I care
Now in this world with no reason can you stop a heart from feeling?

Chorus

Blue Eyes

"Why" (written by Kiyomi)

Why do I stand there smiling, like I'm afraid you'll see me otherwise
Why do I stand there smiling, when what I really want is tears to relieve me

Why do I sit here waiting, like it'll all fall into place
Why do I sit here waiting, is it I'm waiting or a fear of living out my heart

Chorus:
Why wait like I'm afraid to go ahead
Just live life a little, would it help to know we're all the same

Why am I always chasing, a goal that never seems to appear
Why am I always chasing, when I can really say is today I'm living out my dreams

Chorus:
Why can't I see my dreams when they come my way
Just live life a little, would it help to know we're all the same

Verse + chorus (instrumental)

Chorus:
Why the smile when I'm feeling otherwise
Just live life a little, would it help to know we're all the same

"Little Girl Smiling" (written by Kiyomi)

She checks her reflection, to put her smile in place
For this she must do, to greet the world

She's calm and she's cool and there's never a trace
Of what might be going on inside
So set is she with that veil on her face
That her heart's never been released

Chorus:
She's a little girl smiling, but with hidden tears streaming
Cuz inside she's screaming and no one can even tell
She's a little girl laughing, but she's surely faking
Cuz inside she's shaking, from the grief she can't seem to display

She checks her reflection, and her smile is still in place
For this is the way she greets the world

But when she looks a little closer she can't ignore
The helpless cry in her eyes
But this is choked back and replaced
With a smile that could destroy

Chorus

She checks her reflection, to put her smile in place,
for this she must do, to greet the world

Little Girl Smiling

"Flustered" (written by Kiyomi)

Sometimes you fool me
Sometimes I even fool myself
But when my heart's being pulled like this
I start to feel a little flustered

What the hell am I feeling?
Won't someone please answer that for me
It's when your eyes flinch like that, search like that,
and try to pry me open like that oh
That's when I feel, a little flustered

Chorus:
It's all mysterious, this can't be serious, I'm being delirious, now
Now it's ridiculous cuz it's always been inconspicuous
Why do you have to tickle me this way, baffle me this way
Why do I find myself in a haze over you?

And sometimes you fool me
Sometimes I find that I'm the one fooling myself
I can hear my heart saying it's a mere illusion
But I can't help but feel a little flustered

Sometimes you fool me. Sometimes I even fool myself
And when my heart's being pulled like this
I start to feel a little flustered
Oh I'm just feeling a little flustered

Flustered

"My Place" (written by Kiyomi)

I can only sit and wonder, why I didn't let you in
My heart felt like it was floating, seeing the spark still in you eyes
Your smile is so real it feels like a serenading
Strange how that smile seems to cause me to back away

I can only sit appalled, at why I never let you in
When my heart just keeps on screaming, but to you I appear unshaken
My disguise causes pain to pierce through your eyes
Funny how that pain bounces right on back to me

Chorus:
It's like my life just dances on by but somehow my heart's still stuck
I try, to find my place
Though I resist can I find the calm to ease my way out there
Into my place

I can only sit and hope, that I'll follow what I've known
But my heart feels a little frantic, clinging to a hope that's drifting away
The truth is that my fear, is what keeps me here stranded, astray
Can I let my fear fade you to a mere memory?

Chorus

Can I let my fear fade you to a mere memory?

My Place

"And One Day You'll Know" (written by Kiyomi)

Did you know, I was crying when you came into our world
I was crying, when I first held you in my arms
And one day you'll know that life can be dark sometimes
So dark you just don't know where to turn

Did you know, when tears would fall
I'd have to run over to see you
And one day you'll know that only you could make me smile
Through my tears I did in fact smile

Chorus:
Ooh my darling
Ooh my sunshine

Now it's come to where I can feel the world, once again
All I needed was time and someone like you
And one day you'll know someone who'll make you smile inside
And my dear I know you'll always make me smile

Chorus

And my dear I know you'll always make me smile

And One Day You'll Know

"Mysterious You" (written by Kiyomi)

I know I haven't known you for very long
But something in your eyes reminds me of how I used to be
And I guess that was enough for chance to place you
Into a part of my heart

There's a way you walk around in this world
With your unbreakable air and your cool disposition
But I know there's something more, that you carry inside you
Like you're afraid for your heart

Chorus:
You know I think we all have a little pain, inside
Believe me I'd be one to understand
And I'm pretty sure that's what drew you to me
Now I have this little song
Which through your mysteries, I want to thank you for
Your uneasy eyes, they don't hide your heart

Even now you still remain a mystery to me
But the way you watched my face while I was asleep
Got me scared, got you scared and left us fumbling for words
Still you're a little place in my heart

Chorus

(doo)

Mysterious You

What Do You Do? (written by Kiyomi)

I woke up, early this morning
Just to find life leering at me
What do you do, when you find your frustrations
Stare you in the face, what do you do?

I think of the times of pure exhilaration
The times when my heart sings through me
Sharing the stories of life paired with a melody
I start to feel at ease, so I sing a song, so I sing a song

Chorus:
Sometimes life's trials complicate, so I just have to throw them all away
And I feel it turn around, and I see it's only in me
Cuz you can always find a smile and if not then time will allow
Always, always, always, always

I woke up early this morning
Just to find life leering at me
What do you do when you find your frustrations
Stare you in the face, what do you do?

I think of my love, and his kind blue eyes
And the way that everything I am, is now beautiful
So I turn around and dance into a calm blue sea
I start to feel at ease when I swim in your eyes, swim in your eyes

(repeat chorus) 

What Do You Do

Kiyomi Hawley is a singer/songwriter that was born into a very musical family and music has always been her main love. She was born and raised in a cult which was, at times, challenging, and often left her feeling confined and alienated. However, there were positive aspects as well, as she was always surrounded by music and had many performance and travel opportunities. Because of the difficulties that she experienced, she was able to learn, grow, and cultivate the ability to find beauty in most situations. Perhaps these experiences were needed in order for her to become the person she needed to be.

Music and writing have always been her constant sources of comfort. She has been recording her life in journals since she was 12. Her life stories and her musical background make up the songs she writes and records.

Kiyomi studied Classical and Theatre Voice and Studio Composition, but likes to mostly rely on her ear and inspirations when creating and performing. She has had the opportunity to tour the US, Japan, and Korea. She’s also performed for foreign ambassadors and members of the UN. She’s appeared on local TV shows, has been written about in local magazines and websites, and is or has been played on radio stations such as Pandora, WVCR-FM, RPI’s Local Riot, SUNY Stonybrook WUSB, and Women of Substance Radio. She’s performed all over Westchester County and in NYC in venues such as The Bitter End, Sidewalk Café, and Alphabet Lounge.

In 2011, she released her first album titled “Child In Me”, and will be releasing a brand new EP in late September 2018. The title track “Meet You There”, is about wanting to be loved and accepted for who you are. It was produced by the amazing Kevin Bents.

Today, Kiyomi’s main love is still music, she still keeps a journal, and she has been long removed from the cult. Currently, along with being a singer/songwriter, she is a private voice and piano coach and has been blogging since 2011. She is a lover of life, and in Japanese, her first name means Pure Beauty.

Why

Kiyomi Hawley

Related tracks