if I say truth, other ignore it because it hurts...

spotify :)

liminary

https://tidecruz.bandcamp.com/album/nothing-is-real-part-xvi
for those who download, there is 6 bonus tracks hidden in the zip, and a photo of my scar across my chest.
as i stare death in the eyes again, i will instead share the story of my birth.
when i was born i was crushed in half. my chest was completely sunken in and i was to die.
i grew up deformed and as soon as i was old enough i went under the blade. a gifted surgeon saved my life by cutting my chest all the way across, using a saw and cut every single one of my ribs and sternum in half and straightened my chest. because of my birth, i am to avoid things like weight lifting, as i can bend in half at my mid chest , not just my waist. this made me an adequate skateboarder, but always being the camera man hunched over only made things worse. ultimately i found music and it saved my life from the drug culture, bad friends, and helped me have the time i needed to discover who i was and the reason why i didn’t die at birth. i was always meant to be the one who couldn’t kick the kickball far, get invited to the school dance, or called a druggy for being a skateboarder. all these things left immense emotional damage that i only today see were the building blocks to what i consider to be the last bastion of emotional music, from the deepest depths of depression, hopelessness, physical and emotional agony, self injury, and grief. sometimes at night i lay in bed rubbing my finger across my scar, and i speak to the ceeling at my best friend Jake. He was shot in the head and left dead for 3 days in a pool of his own blood by a man who broke in to steal his weed. I lay here touching this scar telling jake, “I’m going to do all the things we said we were going to do.” The final song on the album, because my hands were not working. I called apon him. i said, “Jake, be my hands when my body has failed me. I want you to make a song like the old style. Like nothing is real part 1.” and my hands began to move on their own. i wasn’t thinking or feeling my body’s pain anymore. in just 4 hours jakes soul inhabited my body and completed this song. And when he was done, i snapped out of it and hit play. Thank you jake, for helping me on this album. You did great friend. One day again i will call fourth your name to carry me when my feet begin to drag.

download

there is nothing i can do.

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alive

my new song «if i tell you, it might hurt» is available worldwide

released through @dreamscapeee 💜

Listen here:
https://lnk.to/ifitellyouitmighthhurt

leapyear:
leapyear.carrd.co
Spotify: spoti.fi/3X2Hr0q
IG: www.instagram.com/leap.yr
SC: @leap_yr

thank you for listening. i hope you enjoy 💙

leapyear - if i tell you, it might hurt

eternal

Stream / Download:
https://oneheart.lnk.to/tales

Follow me:
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open.spotify.com/artist/6ovctVkv7d2fBdilDRYfDW
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released by dreamscape

solitude

Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/album/3Pb21vmCyKEjjZAgfLLJ1l?si=JWLCktANRYuuFxWbf_g0gg

fade away

stream: lnk.to/luminance

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luminance

Øneheart, my head is empty - departure

“sometimes i wonder why i can’t let go” is an ambient track by Chad Nathan

sometimes i wonder why i can’t let go

When You're Still There

ambient music 

thanks for listening. i hope you enjoy 🌀

leapyear - if i tell you, it might hurt

leapyear

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