🫶🏻

My Jams

lyrics:

why do i keep coming back to this?
it's like a book I can't quite figure out
so I read it in pieces
sometimes it hurts
gotta set it down for a bit
but I always come back to this

why do I keep running into this?
every time I make a wrong turn
I end up on your doorstep
sometimes it hurts
gotta step away for a bit
but I always come back to this

I always come back to this

and maybe I'm stupid
for thinking the world might end
and maybe I'm stupid
for thinking you'd be with me when it did
and maybe you'd be better off
if you never saw me again
again

but god damn I keep coming back to this
I've tried to understand
but I can't make it make sense
maybe its time to just
kind of go with it

cause even if it's not now
I will end up here somehow
it's physics or it's fate and I can't stop it
I always come back to this
I always come back to this

physics or fate (voice memo)

lyrics:

it's not a competition
but maybe it is
and I think I'll win when you least expect it
slip off your socks and then
take her to bed
I will show up when you least expect it

I always do

but I think I found someone to buffer the pain
I think I found what you have in your veins
so I'll never lose
and it's never true
I lie every day
but I will always hate losing to you

it's not a competition
but I moved on first
and you must have something to say about it
tell all your friends that I hurt you worse
cause you know I'll have something to say about it

I always do

but I think I found someone to buffer the pain
I think I found what you have in your veins
so I'll never lose
and it's never true
I lie every day
but I will always hate losing to you

I thought I found someone to buffer the pain
but it didn't last and it wasn't the same
still I'll never lose
but he's never you
I lie every day

I thought I found someone, or that's just what I say
to help keep the devil and his dogs away
it's an ego thing, true
but it's time you knew
I die every day
cause I will always wait for you

it's not a competition (voice memo)

random tik tok demo i made, about the beauty of letting go.
pro 3:5-6

hold you down (demo from tik tok)

it's been a long long time - matthew ifield

Christian Leave - Please Notice (Slowed + Reverb)

pluto projector - rex orange county (cover)

lyrics:

my brain feels heavy
like too much tv
it's weighing on me like a pound of concrete
i know he wants me
and that makes me happy
so why do i feel so weird?

it's foggy in my head
like clouds in a storm
the winds picking up
i'm bolting my shit to the floor
but when i'm with him
my shit gets ignored
is that why i feel so weird?

i'm alone almost every night and
i don't know if i'm processing right
but my therapist says to just let light be light
so i'm letting him stay around
i think that he's good for me
this boy that i've found

i don't like
getting attached
it makes me feel like i've
done something bad
cause i'm not dependent
and i know that
so why am i scared i'm
reliving that part of my past?

cause i'm alone almost every night and
i don't know if i'm processing right
but my therapist says to just let light be light
so i'm letting him stay around
i think that he's good for me
this boy that i've found

i think that he's good for me
this boy that i've found

is this what it's supposed to feel like?

i'm alone almost every night and
i don't know if i'm processing right
but my therapist says to just let light be light
so i'm letting him stay around
i think that he's good for me
this boy that i've found

let light be light (voice memo)

covered one of my all time favorite songs ever... hope u like it :)

lua - bright eyes (cover)

enjoy this little christmas cover :)
strings by my bff @laufeylin

christmas makes me cry - kacey musgraves (cover)

lyrics:

i've been falling in love with you from the moment we met
it's been consistent, a constant persistence and it hasn't stopped yet
it's cold but the window is open, and we sit on the ledge
breathing in smoke
breathing in all of this moment
so i don't forget

i've been falling in love with you since september 13th
i didn't know why you were on my mind so frequently
and when you kissed me for the first time i didn't want you to leave
holding you close
holding in those three words
that could change everything

on my couch, watching tv
then you paused it, turned to see me
and you told me that you loved me
nothing was ever the same
there has never been a moment
when i wish you hadn't paused it
on my couch as we watched the office
nothing was ever the same

i've been falling in love with you since the moment we met
and i haven't stopped yet

physics or fate (voice memo)

Lizzy McAlpine