In summer of 1978 Michael Coleman and Kevin Parrott had a number one single with "Matchstalk Men and Matchstalk Cats and Dogs". It sold 750,000 copies and was there only hit. The name of the song is kinda odd and i found it intriguing and wanted to research online to find out what it was actually about. My findings were that it was, boringly, a tribute to the artist L. S. Lowry, not what i was expecting. I had previously thought that it was to do with some mad hellish LSD trip. As i'd thought this i decided to remix it in a psychedelic manner, taking influence from previous trips i have had. 

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Brian & Michael - Matchstalk Men And Matchstalk Cats And Dogs (8/4/1978 )


Jellied cats and dogs

This song apply's to this guy, maybe if he smoked a bong or two he'd stop being such a dick.

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Beatles - All You Need Is Love (19/7/1967)
Verve - The Drugs Don't Work (13/9/1997)



All you need is drugs

Chaotic dubby noise piece made using the MASH HITS Max4live plugin
Get it free here - www.shitmat.co.uk/software

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Michael Jackson - Blood On The Dance Floor (3/5/1997)
Usher - Burn (10/7/2004)
Baz Luhrmann - Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen) (12/6/1999)
Beach Boys - Good Vibrations (4/2/1978)
The Temperance Seven: You're Driving Me Crazy (25/5/1961)
Althia & Donna 'Up Town Top Ranking (4/2/1978)

You're Driving Me Crazy

Eery music I created for All Hallows' Evening from Midge ure's old band Silk (voted best band of the year in 1976) The Sun newspaper), Enigma's Gregorian chants and 'It Ain't Half Hot Mum' actors Windsor Davies & Don Estelle's slow oldie. 

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Enigma - Sadness Part 1 (19/1/1991)
Slik - Forever And Ever (14/2/1976)
Windsor Davies & Don Estelle - Whispering Grass (7/6/1975)

Theo Promomethias

I have about 30 weird audio experiments to upload in the next 10 days but as it's been so long since i've uploaded a mash hit (due to my laptop dying, moving house and having no internet) i wanted to warm the cockles with a megamix jive bunny would approve of. So go grab a can of rio from spar .. it's time to get tropical!!

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Tamperer Featuring Maya - Feel It (30/5/1998)
New Kids On The Block - Hangin' Tough (16/1/1990)
Sak Noel - Loca People (8/10/2011)
Los Lobos - La Bamba  (1/8/1987)
Irene Cara - Fame (17/7/1982)
Flying Pickets - Only You (10/12/1983)
B Bumble And The Stingers - Nut Rocker (17/5/1962)
Craig David - 7 Days (5/8/2000)

La new loca megamix

This is an unlikely combination of something old and something new. Korean pop star PSY's 'Gangnam Style' got to the number one spot last month, quite deservedly, after a going completely viral worldwide, with the music video getting over 660 million plays on youtube (and becoming the most "liked" video in YouTube history) and even the major of London, Boris Johnson, saying he and David Cameron did the gangnam style dance at the 2012 conservative conference. The other element to this mini-mash is the wonderful 1950's ragtime pianist Winifred atwell. Who was the first black person to get a number one single in Britain and the still the only female instrumentalist to do so. 

I have a lot of time for Winifred, she has a beautiful smile and even used a musical saw on the recording i used for 'Ye old Gangam Style'

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Winifred Atwell - Poor People Of Paris (13/4/1956)
PSY - Gangnam Style (6/10/2012)


Ye old gangnam style

Defiantly the most raunchy song to ever reach number one. At 2.30 in it sounds like an actual recording of Jane and Serge making love,  or serge having a wank....

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Jane Birkin & Serge Gainsbourg - Je T'Aime... Moi Non Plus (11/10/1969)

Je vous déteste et vous avez aisselles malodorantes

This track is simply built around a choral part of David Whitfield's 'Cara Mia'. It also has a slowed down and folded section of of Vera Lynn's 'My Son, My Son' in it to.

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
David Whitfield - Cara Mia (2/7/1954)
Vera Lynn - My Son, My Son (5/11/1954)

1954

Another Juke inspired mash hit. This time i sampled various parts from Paul Young's  'Wherever I Lay My Hat'  and vocals from Run Da Silva's & Cassandra's 'Touch Me'

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Paul Young 'Wherever I Lay My Hat' (23/7/1983)
Rui Da Silva  featuring Cassandra - Touch Me (13/1/2001)

Coming home early in the morning

Inspired by Planet mu release 'Da Mind Of Traxman' and memories of being 18 living in Norwich doing lot's of buckets.

Note : After making this track i realised had also used Rita Ora 'How We Do (Party)' in Mash Hits # 200 .. This has happened 4 times before when i forget to delete or cross off a track off the list. Basically i try and always avoid using the same track twice although there is no rule that i made that states this.

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles...
Rita Ora - How We Do (Party) (25/8/2012)
Eminem.. Lose Yourself (14/12/2002)
Afroman - Because I Got High (27/10/2001)
Typically Tropical - Barbados (9/8/1975)

Buckets in Norwich

The deadline for this project to end is today and i'm shitting it i won't get finished in time. This piece is created from Charles Aznavour's 'She' which reminds me of my grandma for some unknown reason.

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Charles Aznavour - She (29/6/1974)

Running out of time

Police vs The Beatles ..

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Beatles - Eleanor Rigby' (18/8/1966)
Police - Walking On The Moon (8/12/1979)

Eleanor Marley

Captain sensible remixed in the theme of Happy Hardcore. Sounds a bit like shitmat circa 2003

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Captain Sensible - Happy Talk (3/7/1982)
Fragma Toca's Miracle (22/4/2000)
Girls Aloud.. Sound Of The Underground (28/12/2002)

Hardcore Talk

This is not a track. It is a answer, a sound and a solution to a problem. I had a bad case of David over population in my 'Every Uk no 1 single ever' folder. 9 tracks to be accurate. Firstly i made a pie chart to know what i was dealing with. As you'll see David Cassidy is the biggest issue with 3 number one songs to deal with, Bowie and Soul have 2 each and Sneddon and Essex just one. But what to do with them all?

Firstly i took all the songs and layered them on top of each other. This sounded like a mess so i rendered the mess out, imported it back in and sped it up as fast as i could go. this made a 4 second noise. I then took that noise and made 22 variations of it imported it into S-LAYER in NI Reaktor. Messed around with it until i was happy then recorded that out and started to design the sound. This took a lot longer than i thought and in conclusion it was a complete waste of time. What i'm left with is a even bigger problem. Lack of hours to finish this project in time. Bahhhhh... 

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
David Cassidy - Daydreamer / The Puppy Song' (27/10/1973)
David Cassidy - How Can I Be Sure' (30/9/1972)
David Essex - Gonna Make You A Star' (16/11/1974)
David Soul - Don't Give Up On Us (15/1/1977)
David Soul - Silver Lady (8/10/1977)
David Bowie - Ashes To Ashes' (23/8/1980)
David Bowie - Let's Dance' (9/4/1983)
David Sneddon - Stop Living The Lie (25/1/2003)


How to solve a problem like David

Slade's 'Cum on feel the Noize' has the most misleading track title in chart history. It's not the least bit noisy and the song should have been named after another line of line in the lyrics. Perhaps "Girls rock your boys" "Ah, ah, ah (wooooo)" or "So you think my singing's out of time, it makes me money" would have made more sence. But as the KLF said in the manuel "calling your soon to be hit single by the first line of chorus wil get your a few thousand more record sales" ..  

Well anyhow let's just say i used Slades track name to inspire the direction of this one!
Listenable? Nah ... Noizy? yup

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Slade - Cum On Feel The Noize' (3/3/1973)


Cum on feel the noize

Distant ambient piece made from 3 hits of the sixties. 

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Moody Blues 'Go Now!' (28/1/1965)
Manfred Mann - 'The Mighty Quinn' (14/2/1968)
Jet Harris & Tony Meehan 'Diamonds' (31/1/1963)

I wish i could crawl into the space between the notes

Some serious bullshit goes on in the government, we get screwed in every hole. Thought i'd make a short soundtrack for that trail of thought.

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Paul McCartney - Pipes Of Peace (14/1/1984)
Lonnie Donegan - Gamblin' Man (28/6/1957)
Manic Street Preachers - If You Tolerate This Your Children Will Be Next (5/9/1998)




Fuck the Goverment

This is Nonsensical garbling audio manipulation. 

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Suzi Quatro - Can The Can' (16/6/1973)
Erasure - Voulez-Vous (from Abba-esque EP ) (13/6/1992)
Aaliyah - More Than A Woman (19/1/2002)

Bruno Brookes Psilocybin Shower

What a phenomenal uk number one this was. Jimmy's track Voodoo chille was number one week on xmas 1970 and was and stil is the most freak out music reach the top spot. it's pungent guitar sound, free spirit and a killer riff it's hard not to dig and stepped out of the musical 'Safe zone' that most chart toppers stuck to. I decided to not use the riff i liked so much as it was too obvious and chose to use the dampened fret noodling that opens the song as a sound source instead. Once i sampled the parts i wanted to i loaded them into a live set up i use for improvising and mildly freaked out with my fingers twisting the pitch knob etc. Hopefully i have made something Hendrix would appreciate if he was stil alive now

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Jimi Hendrix - Voodoo Chile' (21/11/1970)

Voodoo onion

An difficult improvised plunderphonic piece in which i freed up a selection of number ones including an awful trance one by urban nugget NE-YO. 

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Tams 'Hey Girl Don't Bother Me' (18/9/1971)
All Saints -  lady marmalade (9/5/1998)
Bruno Mars - The Lazy Song.. (21/5/2011)
Ne-Yo - Let Me Love You (Until You Learn To Love Yourself)  (15/9/2012)

Turning maltesers into kites

A insane hurricane of melted and reformed chart hit's served on a bed of Kajagoogoo.

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Olly Murs - Dance With Me Tonight .. w/e Dec 17 (1)
will.i.am ft. Eva Simons - This Is Love w/e July 7 (1) in@No.1
Suzi Quatro 'Devil Gate Drive' 23/2/1974
Five and Queen - We Will Rock You 29/7/2000
Union Gap featuring Gary Puckett -'Young Girl' 22/5/1968
Kajagoogoo 'Too Shy' 19/2/1983
One Direction - What Makes You Beautiful.. w/e 24 Sept (1) in@ No.1.
Tony Di Bart - The Real Thing 7/5/1994
Shakira Ft Wyclef Jean - Hips Don't Lie .. 8/7/06 (1)
Leona Lewis - Bleeding Love .. 03/11/2007 (7) in@ No.1 ..
Zager & Evans 'In The Year 2525' (Exorium & Terminus) 30/8/1969
Bucks Fizz 'Making Your Mind Up' 18/4/1981
Wanted - All Time Low.. w/e 07 Aug (1) in@ NIt Wasn't Me
Cheryl - Call My Name .. w/e June 23 (1) in@No.1
Sweet 'Blockbuster' 27/1/1973

The Dregs

Doing this project has been like a gigantic sonic jigsaw. Trying to find the right thing to do to the right song and making the dessions at a very fast pace. Along the way i have found numbers one singles which sound great through a ring modulator effect. Others times sampling various number ones have provided me with sounds for a  drum kit. Sometimes what the song sounds like or what it contains are irrelevant and they get used in the name of plain and simple experimental music making.  There's ones that are made to make a social statement like 'Demon Guetta' and 'Music for Simon Cowell's funeral' and 'Fuck the goverment' .. But one of the most popular styles that i have done is infact the most obvious and simple. The pairing of two well known tracks togther. Belive me when i say that i have tried hundreds of combinations. Rage Against the machine & When the going gets tough, the tough get going, Vengaboys & Beetles, So solid crew & engelbert humperdinck, Captain sensible & doris day. These are ones did not work but many did work and they a lot of the time they bring out the best in each other, just like a good couple.

I was really worried that by the end of this project i would be left with the worst stuff to work with, the dregs (see mash hit #285 - The dregs) and i was. This was in fact the last true mashup track/megamix i did. It used up all the best track for mashup music i'd saved to use near the end. I felt like a greedy bastard who goes to the fridge and cupboards and gobbles all the nice food and leaves just the celery, oxo cubes and tinned sweetcorn. Some nice pairings on this one, my favourite being Bobby Darin's 'Mack the Knife' with Sonique's 'It Feels So Go' .. Ps. some tracks just go well with anything so if you wanna try your hand at doing some mash ups a good starting point is trying GHOSTBUSTERS THEME SONG, UPTOWN GIRL, SWEET DREAMS or GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE FUN. Give it a go you could help a song find the perfect match and they'd live happily ever after as tiny Mp3 file!! i did and i feel great about myself :-)

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
The Firm 'Star Trekkin' 20/6/1987
Jive Bunny & The Mastermixers - That's What I Like 21/10/1989
Spacedust - Gym & Tonic 24/10/1998
M/A/R/R/S ''Pump Up The Volume /
Sam and The Womp - Bom Bom .. w/e Sept 01 (1) in@No.1 
Lonnie Donegan.. Puttin' On The Style /  28/6/1957
Kay Starr : Comes A-Long A-Love - 23/1/1953.
Bobby Darin 'Mack The Knife' 16/10/1959
Smokey Robinson & The Miracles 'Tears Of A Clown' 12/9/1970
Black Legend - You See The Trouble With Me 24/6/2000
Erasure  - Take a Chance on Me" (B. Andersson / B. Ulvaeus) - 3:43
Pet Shop Boys - Heart.mp3
Shaggy featuring Rikrok.. It Wasn't Me 10/3/2001
Mint Royale - Singin' In The Rain .. 14/06/2008 (2) in@ No.1 ..
Desmond Dekker & The Aces 'Israelites' 16/4/1969
Destiny's Child.. Survivor 28/4/2001
Creedence Clearwater Revival 'Bad Moon Rising' 20/9/1969
Sonique - It Feels So Go.mp3
Bob The Builder - Can We Fix It.mp3
Ne-Yo - Beautiful Monster.. w/e 14 Aug (1) in@ No.1 ..
S Club 7.. Don't Stop Movin' 5/5/2001
Katy Perry ft.Snoop Dogg - California Gurls.. w/e 03 July (2) in@ No.1 ..
Pet Shop Boys 'Heart 9/4/1988
Dawn featuring Tony Orlando 'Tie A Yellow Ribbon Round The Old Oak Tree' (21/4/1973)
Wizzard 'See My Baby Jive' 19/5/1973
Melanie C- I Turn To You 19/8/2000 
Madonna 'La Isla Bonita 25/4/1987

Chart Trek

Here is an example of a perfect pairing of two songs. If these two tracks were on the TV show 'Take me out' i just know 'The Power' would pick 'Double barrel'.

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Dave & Ansil Collins - 'Double Barrel' (1/5/1971)
Snap - The Power (31/3/1990)

Double Power

A delightful folded piano work and my last one of this style in mash hits.

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Michael Andrews feat. Gary Jules - Mad World (27/12/2003)

Untitled

For this one i reapropriated the songs bellow to make a cover version of the cheeky girls song 'The Cheeky Song' (touch my bum)'. I had this idea a long way back and pleased that i followed through with doing it. The original is such a meaningful song and it really says so much about life. it was a pleasure covering it, Thanks Gabriela and Monica!

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Engelbert Humperdink - The Last Waltz' (6/9/1967)
Blur - Beetlebum (1/2/1997)
Soul II Soul featuring Caron Wheeler - Back To Life (24/6/1989)
Petula Clark - This Is My Song (16/2/1967)
Ruby Murray: Softly, Softly (18/2/1955 )

The last waltz

So here are at the final mashup or the final woop as i call it! This one was made about 4 years ago. One of the oldest mash hits and i made it i just after i first thought of the initial Idea.  A truly believe it is a excellent pairing of two tracks and one of the catchiest  additions to the project. Not to say i won 't do anymore mashups or bootlegs but i have plans to work on a totally new project (unrelated to remixing pop music) from tomorrow so this will be the last mashups i upload anytime soon.  

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Busted: Thunderbirds (7/8/2004)
Europe 'The Final Countdown (6/12/1986)
DJ Pied Piper Do You Really Like It (2/6/2001)

The Final Woop

The penultimate mash hits entry.

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Chuck Berry - My Ding-A-Ling' (25/11/1972)
Beats International - Dub Be Good To Me (3/3/1990)
Take That - Never Forget (5/8/1995)
Roy Orbison - It's Over (25/6/1964)



The concluding bit

This is the end of Mash Hits. It has been a epic journey for me and now i need some days for it to sink in that it is actually over. As far as i know  have used every single UK number one single since 1952, i have checked my list numerous times but please let me know if i missed any out!

This mash hit is a subtly altered version of the tender song "Oh Mein Papa" by Eddie Calvert. To make it i bought a 78rpm shellac copy of the record, recorded it from a gramophone. 78rpm records have such a warm dusty sound to them unlike the super crisp, compressed hits of nowadays. This Eddie Calvert track in particular i found very beautiful so that's why i saved it until the end. 

I'd quite like to press some stuff onto shellac. Would be fantastic to hear DJ RED ALERT & MIKE SLAMMER's killer EP's on a gramophone.  ... True Old School!!!

Over the course of the last 319 days i have reworked, re-imagined, remade and mashed up 1213 number one singles into 293 tracks. I have analyzed and dismembered the most popular music of six decades. I have made an aural illusion by turning Gary Barlow into Kurt Cobain, Stretched Brian Adam's 'Everything i do i do it for you' to last 16 weeks, Turned chart trance into mood music, tuned elvis into freakout guitar music, tuned elvis into electronica, turned elvis into music concrete. Defragmented Peter Andre, Wrote a Requiem for Whitney Houston, got justice for Bobby Vinton, Killed Phil, Insulted David Guetta, found out that the proclaimers mix exceedingly well with rage against the machine and Invented a new plunderphonic sub called 'faux rock', but most of all ..... mashed hits. 

Hope you have enjoyed it. Thanks for your support for the the year.

Over and out.

Henry

Made entirely from samples and/or parts of the following British No 1 singles... 
Eddie Calvert - Oh Mein Papa (8/1/1954)


The End

For the past 10 months I have been reworking and re-imagining every UK number one single since the charts began in 1952. Using solely the 1200+ songs with no other samples i have created a huge portfolio of plunderphonic works, varying dramatically from the the absurd to the sublime, from hilarious to profound, recycling the songs that defined the generations with infinite imagination.

The project is evolving and exciting as new works are uploaded daily
online for the world to hear and download. One day you may hear bucks
fizz turned into ambient mood music, the next 100 number ones are
chopped up into fragments and made into a frenzied sound collage and
by friday it's rage against the machine vs the proclaimers vs
vengaboys.

On November 14th 2012 it will exactly 60 years since the first ever
number one, and on that day the project ends.

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