this mp3 file has been sitting on my computer for over a year

i'll post here more now :)


I'm missing you so much, I'll see you die tonight
Just so I can get to you before the sun will rise
I know the signs are on and I feel this too
None of that ever seems to matter when I'm holding you
And I'm wasting away, away from you
And I'm wasting away, away from you
What have I gotten into this time around
I know that I had sworn I'd never trust anyone again but I didn't have to
You had me at hello
I've never seen a smile that can light the room like yours
It's simply radiant, I feel more with everyday that goes by
I watch the clock so I can make my timing just right
Would it be okay?
Would it be okay if I took your breath away?
And I'm wasting away, away from you
And I'm wasting away, away from you

you had me @ hello

prod @1luvpurp & @friendly

https://open.spotify.com/track/3saB6JiQAhTlPmISzHoJ96?si=a0be6f4b2f454be5

Lyrics :

trynna keep my head down
i just wanna keep my eyes closed
my life like a shit show
I'll see you at the front row

baby i just want you here
chalice filled with bloody tears
just drink it up girl don't be scared
you're not going anywhere

promise that you care about it
i hope you know i care about it
i don't wanna say goodbye to you
you're not just anybody
baby put your love on me
i can feel my flesh rotting
tomorrow I'll be dead prolly
she'll be laying with my dead body

i don't wanna wake up 
i don't wanna wake-
for you i don't wanna wait
there's blood splattered on my face
let me bite through you
tell me how you feel
cuz I'm feeling you
if you go i don't want to wait
for you I'll do anything

Spotify

Die with me (friendly & luvpurp)

It's my bday :) thank you to all my friends, bros and fam

suffering - Sedate & Danikiyoko (prod.Lino+Pr37+Soma)

back it up w/jaanay (andrey + augury)

ch2rms - 6am (soma + dose)

I LOVE YALL SO MUCH FOR THE SUPPORT IT MEANS THE WORLD <3
prod @prodandrey @fucktwintails 

LYRICS!!:
feeling like a pirate
up on this island
you know its required
next i hear the sirens
she said im a liar
said im a tyrant
all this cash on me
but i could reach higher

she call my phone up
she need a bat man
we blow his cap back
bullets knock his cap off
we had a fall out
i had to call out
i had to call you
cus thought i had it thought out
why you acting like its somethin if its nothin
fuck it 
she said she trust me but she make assumptions 
fuck it
you talking all that shit we leave you folded
scolded 
she said that she needs me and its urgent
like a surgeon
she open up my heart yes
nobody is perfect
i guess were all angels 
when  writting in cursive

feeling like a pirate
up on this island
you know its required
next i hear the sirens
she said im a liar
said im a tyrant
all this cash on me
but i could reach higher

fuck you i dont need you
like i could bleed you
girl your so see thru
your so transparent to me
like a lieutenant to these
i might inherit a scene
your so dam careless to me
is what shes yelling at me

i been holding it in for too long [prod andrey & twintails]

https://soundcloud.com/loveismisery

legs wrapped around my waist i miss the rhythm 
going chest 2 chest our heart raced like a polyrhythm
fuckin hate going asleep cuz im always getting visions 
she said she loved me while we were changing positions

i'll wither away can you call the mortician?
they act like morrissey in '92
we were up in some hotels i miss the old you
my room feels just like a cell im just tryna keep my cool

i feel like im ian curtis at the end
got attachment issues i think i'll lose all my friends
hate how i treat my life like a long bender
i can hear the void calling i wanna surrender
burn me down like ember

wish it all didn't ring a bell
i don't wanna be conscious please let me fucking go
i feel just like im dante i took a trip thru hell
the only thing that it did 2 me was strip away my hope

okay i got these fucking issues i wish that i could cope 
i've been beaten down but ima give it all until i croak
sometimes i think of u but i feel better when i smoke
i don't know if i miss u or it's just the emotions that you provoke

legs wrapped around my waist i miss the rhythm 
going chest 2 chest our heart raced like a polyrhythm
fuckin hate going asleep cuz im always getting visions 
she said she loved me while we were changing positions

i'll wither away can you call the mortician?
they act like morrissey in '92
we were up in some hotels i miss the old you
my room feels just like a cell im just tryna keep my cool

rhythm (kyoa)

@lilsadboiiudig @friendly

https://open.spotify.com/track/0UkmN9Q8yDxgpuNwADVEVL?si=468c5f80b8c948d8

don't run away

i wish U would say sum
i don't wanna wake up
pink pills crushed up
baby do u wanna take some
i took smth last night
now i'm dying in the morning
..baby don't tell me that ur going
zombie grl ya i rly want u to be mine
ur my world bite thrU me girl just do it tonight xo
everything u do Yk i'll be right behind
i want u, i want u

to take it away
r u feeling the rush ?
girl i'll handle the pain cuz it's never enough
before u start to fade
i need U nxt to me <3

don't run away

don't run away (1sadboii & friendly)

https://soundcloud.com/chewy

my psychosis been getting worse I've been trapped up in my room
I've been fighting daily battles hope I make it to June 
ion wanna wake up I've been sleeping past noon
hope there's someone out there for me wanna give someone the moon

till then I'm scraping all this dirt up off my shoe 
they say you gotta love yourself before anyone can love you
but I'm walking thru my life I've learned that ts isn't true 
cuz I've loved and I've lost but every time I still grew 

still some ppl left me with rage and it makes me feel ill
sometimes i want to take it out act like jennifer hills
this trauma has me up in loops I just wish i could heal
I've been tortured by my thoughts i can't even tell what's real 

I woke up vomiting I just feel so awful
I'm a slave to vices wish I didn't love the bottle 
I keep getting older I'll turn into a fossil 
I fucking hate my own body I feel like a model 

need unconditional love I need it in my life 
I need someone to hold me and say it will be alright 
wanna look into your eyes and have it wash away my spite 
till then I'm crying in my pillow just to feel better at night

my psychosis been getting worse I've been trapped up in my room
I've been fighting daily battles hope I make it to June 
ion wanna wake up I've been sleeping past noon
hope there's someone out there for me wanna give someone the moon

till then I'm scraping all this dirt up off my shoe 
they say you gotta love yourself before anyone can love you
but I'm walking thru my life I've learned that ts isn't true 
cuz I've loved and I've lost but every time I still grew

wanna make it 2 june (heroine)

mental overload
throw my mental over board
i'm not one seeking for help
i don't want you to wish me well
dug in secrets you can't find
my mind's racing all the time
trying to look for answers
but the questions slip my mind
hard enough as is
trying to think the opposite
but i'm pinned down in all directions
head down into submission
trying to find a way out
before the walls are closing in
ooo yeah
before the walls are closing in

all my life's been hard
feel the constant change
new life breathe it in
brand new constant pain
no reason i could trust in
anyone around me
people turn their heads up
just to look down on me
it's harder to go
with everything i know
so hard to trust the process
when treated like an object
ooo hoo
stonewalled into silence
don't trust people around me 
so i don't close my eyelids

mental overload
throw my mental over board
i'm not one seeking for help
i don't want you to wish me well
dug in secrets you can't find
my mind's racing all the time
trying to look for answers
but the questions slip my mind
hard enough as is
trying to think the opposite
but i'm pinned down in all directions
head down into submission
trying to find a way out
before the walls are closing in
ooo yeah
before the walls are closing in

rhythm (kyoa)

mercyyy

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