Crazy how even in a cameo role, my "rivalry" with Carrick continues lmao

Battles I'm In

Jeffree Star Voiced By Jenni No Mercy
Tom Savini Voiced By Raichous
Written By Jenni No Mercy
Mixed By Raichous
Thumbnail By Oofie
Beat Prod. by Frankie Vibes  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C5NbTwBZMMI

Jeffree:
I’m sorry, but why do you wanna face this?
Looking like Ted White after a Jason face lift!
Gotta be a prank. Did the Dobres tape this?
Call you a powder foundation, ya basic!
Now I’ve been used to drama, but this has-been as my rival kinda lowers the bar
I’m fuck-proof on the mic, we’re worlds apart, Hitting you so hard, call me Jeffree WorldStar!
I’ll shatter through that haphazard slash man
A fashion disaster, with a flasher ‘stache, damn!
You career’s gone stagnant, The computer’s your replacement
Only fans are the pale nerds locked in their basements!
This Maniac thinks his blood fests are some hot shit
Boils down to gore porn made by a misogynist!
I’ve been told I was prodigy, a god to be, it’s odd to me
To see the Godfather of Gore is trying offing me!
Face it Tommy Boy! You looking Tubby, boy!
Maybe use your make up magic on that tummy, boy!
One watch of your “Wet Dreams” makes me sick!
Of course you like fencing. You’re just a little prick!
Now you get your chance, old man! Don’t have a heart attack grabbing the mic!
Although that would be a fitting end, to “Screaming Mad” George Lite

Tom:
(Heh) Thank god you stopped, think my hearing went dead
That rap made me envy my fake rubber head
Your damn squeaky voice is a spike to the brain
No wonder your music career’s in the drain
Sorry, princess. You’re shilling it, I make my Blood Money from spilling it
So you can try to make me seem villainous. Of course the Sultan of Splatter is killing it!
You’re used to cheap bars, it’s where you got your start in!
I cut my teeth, cutting wrists in Martin!
In that Hollywood circle, your boy was putting in work
You really wanna measure with your Youtube circle jerk?
I know documentaries, got two about Jason
That Shane Daws shlock was just bad product placement!
You only got lies spilling out your painted kisser
But your silver tongue couldn’t protect you from the sisters!
Cashing in on Controversy, it seems like a crapshoot!
So try to run the track. You can’t handle a tracksuit!
Think it’s time for the living Bratz doll to behave
You can watch me Sundance on top of your channel’s grave!
Hope you’re ready to burn out Jeff, ‘cause that’s all that Stars do
I’m spitting, committed to splitting you. You won’t be around for part 2!

Jeffree:
Watch it hun! I’m an internet icon, this bygone is nothing!
You really can’t throw shade at the shine coming off my Diamond button!
Got millions of followers, your demographic is teeny!
With the way you treat female fans, the real “Creepshow”’s Savini!
Enough Smoke and Mirror, your whole life is bomb
This fake vet was only shooting pics in Vietnam 
Everything you do misfires, it seems to be your lot
Maybe you could ask your daughter how to shoot a better shot

Tom:
Again you go for the cheapest hits, the easy shit, you freaking ditz!
This racist kid, and tasteless twit. Your talents being wasted, bitch!
Wanna question my honor? Your love life is a goner
Only fit in at my school as a model for the monster!
Keep calling me old? Well you’re goddamn right!
Was making movies violent when you were back at Prom Night!
Film is a magical medium, but even I couldn’t make your bars stand out
With that crap performance, even your fans are thinking….What Now?

Jeffree Star Vs. Tom Savini(Prod. by Frankie vibes)

Beat: http://www.shadowville.com/audio//Shadowville.com%20-%20High%20Stakes.mp3
Written By: Jenni No Mercy
Mixed By Raichous
Raichous as Shaggy
RaccoonBroVA As Brock
Additional Help By Raichous


Shaggy:

Scoob! Go grab the snacks! Like, this’ll be fast!
When Shaggy is starting a rap, Like, you’ll lose to him faster than Ash!
I’ve gone against werewolves, and zombies, and ghosts! Like, I’ll leave a tagalong pounded
I find it ironic, your ace was an Onix, but you’re the one that’s getting Ground-ed!
You claim you have rock hard defenses, but don't have the stones to offend
Gave your last badge to a kid who cheated you in a fight when he was ten
And how did your story end? Replaced by a cilantro copy
With your chances of landing the cop or the nurse, in the nicest of  terms, being “Rocky”
While my series ain’t stopping. Like, I paved the way in animation!
The only thing your show’s leading in, is kid’s hospitalization
Over the years, portrayals were racey. Maybe I should be battling Tracy
You’ll need more than pebbles to faze me. There’s no dodging when you face me!

Brock:

Sorry Shaggy, but your tactics really had no effect
As a gym leader, I’m in charge of putting newbies in check
Think that you’re tough? Stop lying, man. You spend the whole mystery crying, man
So if flooding with flow’s your entire plan? Too bad I’ll be safe with my drying pan!
The OG rolling from Kanto! Your solo shows never finish.
If only you could Get a Clue. Your fanbase has quickly diminished.
You’re running from rubber masks. I throw myself into danger
I met with Dittos and mimes, but Denver’s clone’s still stranger!
And I bide my time, you’re rushing for cover to hide
Try as you might, you’ll end up greener than Hyde!
Can’t burn me, I’ve got Guts. I’m taking every attack
Think that you’ll earn my badge? You’ll have to be Boulder than that

Shaggy:

Your raps are ghost types, man. Completely see through
The way this Creeper acts, man, he’s on the verge of a “me too!”
So take defeat dude! Your traveling partners don’t need you!
Especially when it would take only like one percent of my power to beat you!
The sleuthing student moving though straight from the 60s
This dumb fiend may be 15, but ends up looking 50!
So try and hit, your disses miss me, listen to my voice
Like, I’m so amazing, I could beat you with one Zoinks!

Brock:

Your spitting is weak, no surprise though. I could beat this freak with my eyes closed.
Your WB’s Super High joke. I’m Bulldozing you with these tight flows!
His peers and his parents can’t stand him. Constant emotional damages.
I’m helping conquer gods while Rogers is conquering sandwiches!
You gluttonous Munchlax, you’d chomp through anything to get your fill
I studied Pokemon medicine, I’m an expert at things that are ill
From Lillard to West, your films are a mess, so testing me is a poor play
Hide behind the Blue Falcon, 'cause rapping isn't your Forte

Shaggy Vs. Brock

Beat: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4kBndlkZgME

Holt Voiced By JordoMIB
Swanson Voiced By Matt Raichous
Peralta Voiced By Stark Media
Written By Jenni No Mercy
Mixed By Matt Raichous
Thumbnail By Oofie

Holt:

Peralta! Who’s this hairy woodsman in my office?
That pine smell is noxious! He looks so obnoxious!

Jake:

Umm, sir? It’s a rap battle. You’re fighting with disses?

Holt:

Ridiculous! He should know a Captain’s shot never misses!

Ron:

I don’t like you, but I respect the effort
Maybe you should sit this out, don’t think you really wanna get hurt
I’m an expert as a wrecker, or protector, you’ll be busted.
And I hope you’re ready for some Really Good verse Construction

Holt:

I’m the leader of a team, cleaning the streets with precision
While this pigeon isn’t a smidge interested in decisions!
So just listen, all initiative you get goes to waste
So put down the sax, Duke. Silver’s always second place!
Just face it, I’m the greatest in the B99
You’re complacent,  work and laziness walking a fine line
Built up a sense of greatness, but you winning only relates
When you’re ripping through dozens of eggs, like it’s practice for Ann’s place!
And honestly? You’re trying too hard to be anonymous
You’re not some big shot hero: You’re just a common bitch!
No chance that Raymond’s bombing this, I’m obviously better
If I wanted to deal with an old dog, I’d call Cheddar!

Ron:

They gave your cop comedy a spot, but it was wasted
It’s like Mike took his best show and copied and pasted!
Got the lovable dumb lead, the overachieving partner
Sassy and badass women, and the losers, just for starters!
When it comes to spitting harder, I’m blunt with no jokes
Think of this as betting on the ponies, Raymond, ‘cause you’re going broke.
Holt is starting to choke, Velvet Thunder’s a Wet Blanket
Only time you run a track is with your childhood train set

Holt:

Crushing the competition. Is this Jimmie Jabby too?
Try accusing me of cheating, but I’m not Tammy 2!
Not too shabby of a poet, I’m a master with my tone
If you try to spit another verse, you’ll end up BOOOONED

Ron:

Those raps dragged on like your time in uniform did.
I’m so iconic, my stache is always era appropriate
The key to dealing with your bars, is just not listening
To flow so robotic, Twitter thinks a bot’s dissing me
In competition Ron is a General like his namesake
The only time you tried solving a case is when you played Jake!
I’m calling you the Government, you’re crazy and useless
Get your doctor hubby to take a look at your bruises

Raymond Holt Vs. Ron Swanson - Jenni's Jammin' Battles

So, as my way of saying thankyou for all the views and support, I decided to post a second battle this month! A battle about family. And love. And......kicking ass? I don't know. Either way, thank you for everything that you've done. You guys make this possible.


Hank Voiced By Raichous
Red Voiced By Raichous
Thumbnail By SPM1000

BEAT: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lzu_95-l6DY


Red:(Spoken) My foot is about to write a rap for your ass

Red: The US vet against redneck Ted Cruz
With the can-do of the Red White and Blue, I can’t lose
Maybe get Boomhauser to help ya spit fast
You sell grill fuel because you’re full of hot gas!
Now I won’t sugar coat how I feel about Bobby
The way you raise your son, he’ll turn out to be a commie!
Your animation’s sloppy, you can’t draw out a diss
Judging by your rifle skills, all your shots are gonna miss
I was pulling in laughs, as the grumpy pop
You dragged behind Macfarlene then Fox let you drop!
But I’ll give you a shot, even though I’ll still beat ya
Chance of you winning is as narrow as your urethra
Your problems with Cotton? They're clearly in view
But this is not the first time a Dad’s had issues with you!
You must be on “fish bait” if you think you’ll last
So let’s see you try and rap back, dumbass!

Hank:

God dammit Bobby! What is that racket?
I’m not really thinking Egghead is gonna crack it.
Attacking the mack daddy from Heimlich? Insane!
I’m an expert at ass-kicking. Call that pro pain
Judging how I’m gonna raise my kid ain’t smart
Your boy’s gonna grow up with Venom in his heart
You’re a tasteless racist caricature with a complex
Looks like the Navy man swabbed off his “Top Deck”
You wanna lay a hand on your son? You’re a coward
Having to bully teens just to feel a little power
Anybody coming to you for tips must be crazy.
Maybe you should take advice on how to treat your lady!
What amazes me, despite how you love competing
The cast from your reboot has a better chance at beating me!
You call yourself a man? Can’t fool me in a fight
Red needs to get checked, that boy ain’t right

Red:

Saying I’m not right? Don’t make me laugh!
I’ll give you an adult sized boot in the ass!
This sheepish weak fisted wimp ain’t raw
When the only reaction he has is “Bwaah”!
Still can’t poop? Because you’re so full of crap
So dull on the track, you need your grill for hot raps!
Try to fix your verse, but it’s all in vain
You dropped the ball even harder than your wife off a plane!

Hank:

I think Dale would’ve made more sense with rhymes
You must've sat in  "The Circle" ‘fore spitting a line!
You never really think before going off with hasty words.
Red’s such a dog, he should face Ladybird!
And try to talk shop about my kin? Just can it.
You’re picking favorites in the family dynamic!
I’ve had it with this asshole, you need to shut up.
Did the King of the Hill keep his crown? Yup.

Red Forman Vs. Hank Hill - Jenni's Jammin' Battles

Sheldon Voiced By Matt Raichous
Spencer Voiced By  RaccoonBroVA
Thumbnail By Oofie
Mixed By Matt Raichous
Written By Jenni No Mercy
Additional Help By Cri and Anthony Rigatanthoni


BEAT: Old School Slim Shady Type Beat / Weird Funny Hip Hop Rap Beat "Kiss My Ass" Prod. ILL Fortune





Sheldon:

Leonard! Did you call the FBI?
Looks like Quantico sent the OCD P.I.
I would be impressed by your skills on the street
But they won’t help you find how I kill the beat(Bazinga)
I got lyrical theory, scientifically I’m superior
Check the Emmys I got, your show is just inferior
You were growing up delirious, a schizophrenic time bomb
Show was such a bygone, it’s being preached by my mom
You use science as a gimmick
For the magic that you use to fail to pick up women
And It should be a given, getting the fans adoring
But somehow you can make chasing criminals boring
You think I’m jealous, you captured tons of felons?
While I’m still here pulling crowds as Young Sheldon
But I should probably tell him in this match, I got this
My raps are so addicting, you can call them dilaudid.

Spencer:

Hotch? Rossi? This doesn’t seem right.
The MO of our guy says he doesn’t like to fight
But he’s actually here. Trying to get me riled
You wanna play games? Let’s start the profile
A wordy nerd pushing up into his 30s
Ego makes him think he’s worthy, but in truth he’s undeserving
Of a flurry of appraisal his fans just overused
Like the laugh track you abuse to tell them they’re amused!
For us geeks, friends are hard to find.
Which is why it’s baffling you insult yours all the time
I was tortured and shot, needing a cane to walk
But that wasn’t as painful as listening to you talk
Thinking you’re the Apex human is confusing
I drop bombs like Garner, you got twice his delusions!
I push passed my fears, you run away when you’re frightened
You’re Friends with Flags? Time to throw up the white one

Sheldon:

Sorry Reid, I’m disproving your theory
Think you make an impact, let’s look back at our series
(Heh heh) In less time I was made into an icon
Comedy even tighter than the sweater vests you try on
Tried proving your tough, but not effective
When your whole crew treats you like the junior detective
You strive to find happiness just to watch it all end
Left a hole in your heart and your dead girlfriend

Spencer:

You can claim that my life is a tragedy
But really if you ask me, the only thing that’s sad to see
Is you actually convince some lonely girl to marry you
Surprised you didn’t flee, Smarter guys are always scaring you!
And you’ll need more than catchphrases to faze me
It’s crazy they let your show’s writing be lazy
So as you fame fades, there’s no point in faking it
This win isn’t your spot, ‘cause I’m the one taking it

Sheldon Cooper Vs. Spencer Reid - Jenni's Jammin' Battles

Azia as Lofi Girl 
RaccoonBroVA as Kousei Arima
Written by Special Inquisitor Rayyan
Mixed by Light
Beat by Epistra
Cover art by M!CAH
Art in Cover Art by Charles Draws

Lofi Girl (0:13)
Uh, could you quiet down please? I'm trying to revise
At least so I can put my mind to writing lines to fight this guy
I'd turn my headphones up a little to drown out your music
But it's useless when you'd do it to yourself, all 'cause your trauma's ruthless! 
(Hit it)
You really just don't know when to quit it
With living in the past like a haunted spirit
As a child, your skill built you a positive image
But you tore it apart in your music exhibit
It took a dying girl to push your limits
But you didn't wanna pay her visit
When she fought for her life with her failing condition
Just 'cause you were jealous of her friend, what a dimwit
My pen game’s divine, man, check my assignments 
A's all around, you fall flat in the C (sea) that you're trapped in
Your whole life, you've come across violence/violins
Both from the love and the mom which you're lacking 
Face the facts, kid, your existence is tragic, you get beaten up everywhere you go  
And gave your fans a sour taste in their mouths, like you just played them one of your notes

Kousei (0:54):
I often feel trapped, yes, but you're no exception 
Forced to listen to the same songs on repeat 24/7
I can sense the torment in you, your soul’s gradually decaying
Even I don't suffer that much from the music I've been playing (Uh)
You're counterproductive, waving a pen back and forth will not get you the grades that you strive for
None of the tests you've prepared and revised for could compare to all the demons that I've fought
Sleep, you're deprived of, while I am simply unrivaled if we talk musical style
The pianist idol, you just sit idle slaving away with your notes in a cycle
Took over ChilledCow’s channel but you ain't got any beef
You're telling me this Miyazaki reject is my enemy?
Quit selling me your vinyls with recycled compositions
Jade, don't mess with me - in song I'm known to crush my opposition! (Ohhh!)

Lofi Girl (1:36):
I'm taking notes, you can't hear ‘em; to Ryota, you're an interference 
Between him and the girl that you're missing, lied to up until her disappearance 
Feared you couldn't play like you once did; fell from the pedestal that people put you on
No wonder you kept beating yourself up with such an abusive mom 
Don't you get it, Kousei? It's your fate 
Everyone that you love’s being taken away
Couldn't find time with Tsubaki to play
‘Cause you were too busy getting slapped in the face (Ay!)
I can see why you and Kaori match
You're the brains to her brawn ‘cause a brain’s what she lacks
Nothing measures up to the scale of your strife;
All the joy that you’ve felt were short-lived like her life

Kousei (2:02):
I've been taught by the best to not do my worst
And I've caught the attention of all to my work
Jade, you've fought to impress them and leave them immersed
But you brought only dread like you sold them your merch
And I ought to address the barren way that you look
I'd bring more emotion to a keyboard than you could
Face it, you will never top me in fights
When I redesign that face like a copyright strike 
I’ve been moving people with my music since I was a kid
You’re stuck in the same spot for schoolwork, hoping you don’t fail at it
No family in sight to shed any shred of remorse
Just a Whisper to our Hearts, and it's time I finally silenced yours (Shhhh)

Lofi Girl vs Kousei Arima. SIR Rap Battles Season 2 (ft. Azia & RaccoonBroVA)

ENNWAY! as The Slender Man
Vladimyr P. as SCP-173

The Slender Man:
I can’t believe they put a shmuck in the stone age to face this
My Arrival will be brutal if you think you can resist
Dressed with the slickest outfit- you’re just a game design gimmick
While I’m already primed and ready to rid 91 of inanimate mimics (HA)
The stakes are high, go find my pages; brace to die
Haters break in Slender’s Wake so go back to your place and cry
When I’m a bit further away then you can try hard to escape
But your status is as good as static cuz your bars are half-baked

SCP-173:
I thought I was the statue but that flow was dried out
But why bother trying to spit when you don't even have a mouth?
Fuck the D class, your rapping's worth an F, when I am generous
I roll with well made anomalies, your fanbase are degenerates!
I raise hairs on people's heads, because they know their neck is fucked
While you've got people raising voices thinking their machine's defunct!
You cause death upon sight? I guess your movie fits a little then
But I leave belittled kid's tales brittle, right down to their bitter end

The Slender Man:
Try that mouth line again, and since you're talking out your ass-
When I'm done with you there'll be a second time you've bit the grass
Spitting slendersick, so you could only win by proxy
And even as a statue, you lack stone-cold bars to rock beats
Teleport into your cell simply to leave this Peanut cracked
Although your lyrics are such trash it’s barely worth it to [REDACT]
Not even worth a Euclid class, photosensitive to bars
That make it clear that you’re forever stuck exactly where you are!

SCP-173:
You tried to snap back with wack raps, but flinched and broke your lines
So now I’m spitting with such illness; call me 049
Got the bars inside the chamber; you’re shooting blank like your face is
No matter what the case is you’ll be trapped in my containment
You’ll be seen cut in this cutscene no static screen could rattle me
Tried to battle me but it’s so obscene that you’re a Grosse Mann grooming pre-teens
You’re poorly proportionate with the purpose left unknown
For your childish games, so BEN’s not the only thing you’ve blown.

Written and Mixed by Vlad and ENNWAY!
Beat Produced by Dansonn
Cover Art Made by Vlad

The Slender Man vs SCP-173. Sinister Rap Battles

Welcome back everyone to the New Year! To kick off this (hopefully) busy year of GRB, we bring you Professor Oak vs John Madden, the Super Bowl special! This was written back in 2020 so not only is it written in a fairly old style, it was also written before the death of Madden. We mean no disrespect to him even though there is quite a lot of insults thrown his way. I hope you all enjoy!

CAST:
Swizkii as John Madden
Zawesome as Professor Oak

LYRICS:
JOHN MADDEN:
Alright, break, line up, we’ve only got four quarters
To take down an old man, too scared to be a real explorer
You’ve got a lot to learn before you step to the pros
It’s as much in the heart as it is the X’s and O’s
So here’s a guy who’s studied pocket freaks all his life
Who sends a kid away so he can bang a widowed wife
Your best invention’s an index and you still miss some info
Like don’t stick your head out a moving car window
I’ve thought of thousands of plays and plans for each game
You’ve learned 150 critters, but not your grandson’s name
Now it’s the end of my verse, let me give you the rundown
I’ve scored first on your ass, an opening drive touchdown

PROFESSOR OAK:
Hello there, welcome to the world of battle rap
I’m Professor Oak, fly enough to dish out wing attacks
When I rhyme, you decide between getting flamed, drowned, or vine whipped
You only touchdown when you drop your bag of chips
Oh, that’s new, my Pokédex just tracked an intrusion
An overweight, lazy, bastard; a Snorlax evolution
You’ll feel the Wrath when you’re spinning like a Poliwhirl
With those boobs I can’t tell if you’re a boy or you’re a girl

JOHN MADDEN:
I’ve got the cutting edge to chop Oak down to size
You can’t win a rap battle if you don’t flow on the mic
I’ll knock you on your ass like WHAM! BANG! BOOM!
I’m rocking more bootlegs than you got in kids’ bedrooms
Your studies get put to shame when a child claimed your fame
So get your head out of your ass and get your head in the game

PROFESSOR OAK:
Hey You, Drinkachu, you’re about to get zapped
When I pic my opponent, me and my Pokémon Snap
I already said I’m fly so you must have had enough of me
If not, I’ll be flipping this square like it’s Puzzle League
For a color commentator, you seem pretty pale
And when EA's in the game, that's an automatic fail
Now your fame was Raided before you knew what was happening
Even got kicked off the box art, it must be Madden-ing
I roll like a Voltorb; sparking tracks with my rhymes
You’ve been Super Bowled over, the box score never lies

Cover Art by Commander Jacob
Mixed and Mastered by Freshy Kanal

Professor Oak vs John Madden | GridLine Rap Battles Season 3

Lyrics/Beat: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1oRqEeEbJ6oVLUtx_xc6Ty9FjCOzXYKQOMhJWQeV--5g/edit
Alex M. as Junkrat
garbageGothic as Misato Tachibana
Matt Raichous as Roadhog
RaccoonBroVA as Koujirou Sasahara
Written by Legengo and MetaMachine
Mixing by Special Inquisitor Rayyan
Beat arrangement by Raisu Battles
Thumbnail by JK03
Beat by Anywaywell
Hint for next OVvA: "Running Tracks at Record Speed"

Junkrat vs. Misato Tachibana - Overwatch vs. Anything #1

Written by Grasman
Funtime foxy: RaccoonBroVA 
Mettaton: Quizzique 
Mixed by Dani
Edited and animated by Grasman 


Mettaton:
Lights! Camera! Action! It’s time for my debut 
Can't believe it’s gotta be against one of Afton’s fursuits
I appreciate you tuning in, but let’s get something straight 
You gotta built in kiddie lure-er but still can’t attract a mate
Got my face on a billion screens, fan scream when I enter the stage 
While your gender got your fanbase more split than your face plates 
I was made to entertain, wishing I’ll be seen by the human race! 
But I’m having second thoughts based on Scott’s constant Furry bait..
Mettaton EX:
Oh yes! This hunk a’ junk is lackin’ glamor, darling.
I doubt even Alphis could fix this clown’s demonic stare (Oh yes)
I suppose you do a decent job at scaring 
But the real horror here is how this was aloud to be on air 

Funtime Foxy:
It’s time I deliver! A performance was demanded of me!
I heard I was fighting a singer, then who the hell is this freak?
It’s shocking, I thought I was the once with interesting design choices 
But who the hell decided where to place your self-destruct button!
Show no more your show, you’re plaguing my TV
I ain’t seen a singing robot this cheesy sense Chuck E.
I’m bringing joy and happiness to little kiddies 
You’re bringing another reason to hate reality TV
Fursuit? Really? Now that’s just a wrong diss
And least my creator doesn't look like he got jaundice 
There’s only one space on the stage, and you’re trying to rap on it?
I take away the mic, go ask Mike, and then I drop it 

Mettaton EX:
You’re just another lazy recolor, made from other robots smelted 
Guess this’ll be the third time you’ve been burnt so bad you melted
I admit, you’ve been built high tech, hell you gotta voice changer
So why not try to mimic the speech of a decent rapper!

Funtime Foxy:
I know a thing or two about kids in stripes
And i'm still in shock how you lost that fight
I don't fail to deliver, fans have demanded an Encore!
I expected heat from someone coming from the core

Funtime Foxy VS Mettaton- Bonus Battle! (Fr. RaccoonBroVA & Quizzique) [2023]

Two titans of the cards industry deck it out in the series debut of TableTop Rap Battles!

Freeced as Poker
Quizzique as Uno

Written by Quizzique, Alchemyking, Freeced
Mixed and Arranged by GlitchDude
Art by 3ple
Thumbnail by Quiz
Beat prod. by Anywaywell

Poker (0:11)
IT’S POKER NIGHT!
From diamonds to hearts, I’m the poster child
Your fans are like Texas, hold ‘em tight
But for this loner it’s hopeless, I’mma
Blow jokers out like your open mics
Servers must have overheated from Markiplier’s exposures
Now I’m stirring up the flames cause I’m fire with pokers

You couldn’t compare to the stacks that I’m dishin’
Gambling is my mission, my game needs precision for every decision
You’ll need some ambition for this competition
What your fans are missin’ is brains, they envision the colors because it’s
Appealing to the mindless children that flock in your fanbase like pigeons
And flooding the market with SPECIAL EDITIONS

You rode on waves of hype and managed to keep your fame, right
But I’ve got blackjack, while you’re the black sheep of Game Night
You split friendships and families apart more than I cut the deck
Don’t care you lose the heart of the cards, long as you cut a cheque

Uno (0:48)
That whole play was awful, so now I’m jumpin in
Leave a hole punched in you cus you’re out of commission
You say I’m cutting cheques, I’m saying check your cuts
Casinos taking thousands out of players, now they bet the dust

Forget the Jack of Spades, I’m the jack of trades
Your cheatin’ players jacking trades, try my rules and they won’t last a game
You’re past your fame, your only audience is rich kids with depression
I’m the superior game of luck cus I’m dealin in 7s

You’re boring me more than the boardwalks that you’re shoring
Put the chalk up to the scoreboard and you’ll see who’s really scoring
I’d think you were a poker chip the way you’ve been dispensed, dude
Like my +2s, I’d say the odds are stacked against you

Poker (1:24)
Check my legacy, millions of users playing on desktops
You only spawned a couple of losers screaming on Xbox
I’m going coast to coast, you go Uno and Dos
I go big or go home, while your hands only go for broke

My game is so dope, it’s making people draw in Westerns
While all of your draw cards couldn’t even draw investors
I’m one of a kind, you’re crazy eights straight out the bargain bin
But enter the casino gates, you know the house will always win

Uno (1:48)
I got a deuce with my verses, royally flush this gaming turd
Got players’ blood pumping, looks like you hit a Vegas nerve
You’re getting skipped, at such a loss you’ll need to be reimbursed
Now I’m Flippin this battle, let’s send this track in reverse

Chop it up, like drawing a card I’m going off the top
Only bitches play poker, and I ain’t just talking dogs
I shed your insults off like they’re fleas, you’re nothing but a disease
Winning this gamble with ease, cus I’ve got tricks up my sleeves

Once respectable crime, it is such a pity
You’re getting forgotten in time - Atlantis City
Such a snore, you should’ve chosen War to play a waiting game
If you wanna win so bad, all you gotta do is say my name

Poker vs Uno - TableTop Rap Battles #1 (ft. Freeced)

Written by: CreeperPasta 
Beat produced by: Rajaste
Mixed by: CreeperPasta
Thumbnail by: LimJJ
Flowtest by: Theme Park Avenue
Mr Pickles: Dr.Dee
Binky: Kamren
Presentator: Quizzique 
Arthur: CreeperPasta
Arthur's Dad: JustGamer
Francine: CreeperPasta
Muffy: DerpiesGamingBlast


Presentator: 
You Gotta Be Kidding Me: A game for kids and grown ups. What's the problem, Arthur?

Arthur: 
Binky is still fucking my mother, and ever since he came to my house, DW has been missing. What should I do?

Arthur's Dad: 
Here's a tip, Arthur. Get me out of here.

Francine: 
It's ok, Binky is fucking my mother too. You'll get used to it.

Muffy: 
You should mind your business. You'll live longer that way.

Binky: 
Nobody said you couldn't join us, Arthur.

Mr Pickles: 
I know exactly how to deal with your mother, Arthur.

First made her giggle no tickle (uh)
Then made her tickle my pickle (uh)
Killing them all like a sicko (uh)
Make holes in your mind with no prickles (uh)
Do you wanna fight? You're bark and no bite
Don't fuck around with Mr Pickles (uh)
If these bitches bite, oh yes, these bitches bite
Like Tommy, I react with giggles, uh
I'm a different beast from a different breed. I love the taste of minced meat (ruff!)
You're P-BS for an ARG, and as shitpost, you just piss me off
At least I'm loyal to my human. You see your friends as your enemies
You need discipline, so serve me or I serve you to my pet Steve.

Binky:
I took a bath with Arthur's mom, but you're the one who's washed up
Lesser Lassie's trapped in a well. Let's see you get out with more trash talk.
A beast, a threat? To whom, may I ask? It's time you face the facts
You died soulless, and Sheriff replaced you in time as Grandpa gave you the ax 
No more secrets, Mr Pickles. You don't scare me in the least
You may lay down deep on your lair, but you can't hide from this beast
I solve problems. I help people. I seek to achieve perfection
You're a vermin, son of a witch. I hope you like vivisections

Mr Pickles:
Trash talk? I speak the language that makes my bidding get done
From now on, anyone who repeats your verses is speaking in a dead tongue 
So don't threaten me with a good time. Now it's time to say goodbye 
As I rip your limbs, break your ribs and I eat your flesh under the moonlight 

Binky:
Try that on me, your balls come off. Keep this horny beast locked up.
Animals, corpses, your verses, your series. All of those things, you fucked up.
Another problem solved, you knew how this ended deep down.
But cheer up, Mr Pickles. Your corpse will look nice in my treehouse.

Mr Pickles vs Binky (You Gotta Be Kidding Me) - Rap Off

(0:14) Weirdcore:
Are you alone? (*knock knock*) Do you hear the knocking?
Seems I’ve found the house of the Insane Clown Posse
Who waste their time and money to embody circus freaks
And I'll strike down like Nintendo for using Pikmin OSTs

How you fools maintain a smile’s truly a puzzlement
Got too many mental issues for a single clown to juggle it
Balloons are the only blowing up from this Tik-Tok trend
While we have our eyes everywhere… except for on your content

(0:41) Clowncore:
Oh goodness, how tragic is this sad fabric fad’s rapping,
But with that mushroom fixation, makes sense that you’d be capping!
I’m the fungi here, you’re shrouded in darkness like your filters
You only stole the show because you popped the ‘pill’ in ‘pilfer’! (Hoho!)

I exist to bring smiles, but can't tell if you're chucklin'
When you cover that mug like your parents do when you're in public!
Your mind is stuck in empty fields ‘cause you only grow sad
But I could just find the remote and shut you up, tally-hoes mad!

(1:08) Weirdcore:
Caking your unsightly face in paint layers so thick
Yet with all those cosmetics you still couldn’t make-up a diss
You prey on kids, can't evade this when you can't dodge accusations
Tack on a seizure warning for the police lights that are chasin'

I’ll cut out some (paper dolls!) after you’re skinned alive,
How ironic (Ronald McDonald!)’s the one who’s getting fried
But here’s a solution for all the (Trouble!) you’ve been feeling:
Make like a (Worm on a String!) and hang yourself from the ceiling

(1:36) Clowncore:
Audiences stay invested with my discography so splendid! 
And while I rock suspenders, your fans’ accounts get suspended! (Hohoho!)
Clowncore’s the IT factor, spend pennies wise to stay jolly
Fitting these surrealist tick-tockers are addicted to buying dollies (Dalis)!

Thanks for visiting our fun house, but now your luck has run out
Call me Geiru Tornado with how fast I’ve brought this bum down
You should have teamed with Dreamcore, ‘cause it’s nightmares I’m supplying
Now it’s bedtime for this Gremlin, so go to your room and cry, bitch!

Alex M. and Azia as Weirdcore
BirdJormungandr as Clowncore
Written by Nugget, Raisu Battle, Awesome Ayden, BirdJormungandr, ForgottenSon
Additional Writing by Jacobrl99
Beat by Call me Brian 
Mixed by Trakked
Edited by Raisu Battle


Everyone subscribe to Raisu. He is the goat!

Thumbnail by Grasman

clowncore vs weirdcore 2 (Ft Alex M, BirdJormungandr, and Azia)

Snakebite126 / Dudz as Daniel LaRusso (Audio / Visual)
Vladimyr P. as Spider-Man

Lyrics: 
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1mAEnYANe1Pi3f_mn-vTn84bQ2NLX9BIfV_CmXT7bLVY/edit?usp=sharing

Written by: Vlad, King Can Productions, and Froggy
Beat Producer: Hollywood Legend
Audio Mixer / Effects: Vlad
Beat Mixer: Freshy Kanal
Cover Art Made by Vlad

The Amazing Spider-Man vs The Karate Kid. Universal Rap Battles

Welcome to episode 2 of TableTop Rap Battles, where these absorbers of orbs take bites out of each other!

Danii as Hungry Hungry Hippos
https://www.youtube.com/@SwaggyFlan
Fightmarker as Pac-Man
https://www.youtube.com/@fightmarker

Written by Quizzique
Mixed and Mastered by Zagranis
Beat prod. by InsaneBeatz
Art by WAN
Thumbnail by Quiz

Hungry Hungry Hippo (0:11)
If you wanna win the game, you gotta take good aim
Not roam around a maze searchin’, for some ghosts to maim
It’s a household name, with the childhood acclaim
You think you’re the same, but your console fame is down the drain

It’s a race, it’s a chase, hurry up and feed my face
The only phantom here’s your cabinets now haunting the arcades
I was entertaining kids before they made your ugly mug
While your memes only pleased Gen Z til you got swept under the Rugg

Pac-Man (0:33)
This hippo with the fattest waist wants to face it up and fight?
It’s a hunk of plastic waste against the greatest of all time
I eat a track like power pellets, better start to flee like Clyde
If you’re so damn hungry hungry then I’ll serve you by the slice

Yo, you say my game’s the ghost while you eat dust at Hasbro
Think you’re family friendly? You got kids slapping your ass, bro
You must’ve lost your marbles, like your film’s producers, they got scattered
Then a child found them, and now your whole gag’s a choking hazard

Hungry Hungry Hippo (0:56)
All those burns are useless, man, I got redeemed by ICE
I eat your flames and spit them back, your fire hydrant won’t suffice
Trapped inside a haunted maze, is eating pellets such a struggle?
When your brand feeds off of you so much, should really call it Nom-co

I’ve got a conga line, you couldn’t conjure lines to buy your shit
Franchise is half-assed, so it makes sense Midway acquired it
This nerd should know he can’t compare to the bite of a hippopotamus
Because my stomach’s like your fall from grace: Bottomless

Pac-Man (1:19)
Your redemption’s like a plastic broken jaw, there still ain’t no budgin’
Shit’s as trusty as your tournaments, they both got Rogue Judges
My fruity power-ups demolish all your Veggies
Cover genres, while your online fanbase is just like your teeth: edgy

They call me Puck Man, you’re just a Piggy Punk, man
You’re outta luck, man, I don’t give a fuck, man
Gaming mascot 1, groups of 3-4, I eat ‘em all
So you can call me Level 256, ‘cus I’m unbeatable

Hungry Hungry Hippos vs Pac-Man - TableTop Rap Battles #2 (ft. Danii and Fightmarker)

Pressha Tha EP

Pressha Bust Pipes

Fun fact! One day, millions of years from now, the sun will devour the earth! Melting billions of humans alive as the planet we know and love is reduced to nothing, not even ashes! Those’ll be burned too! Thanks for tuning into Science Facts with Legengo, the Master of Wolves!

Epic Rap Battles of Nostalgic is an Epic Rap Battles of History style rap battle series with the focus of using nostalgic fictional characters.

Series run by Matt Raichous

Junkrat vs. Misato Tachibana - Overwatch vs. Anything #1

MGRB

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Epic Rap Battles of Nostalgia

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