HOW I LEARNED TO SURF

Years ago
I felt my legs trembling
and could not see the cause

so I decided to close down
and sat myself down 
on a flat desert stone. 

But in stillness
I started to feel
mysterious energies
working within me: 

an emotional ocean heaved and crashed 
in waves of constant conflict.

I tried
but could not tame that storm.
I wanted to run 
but felt too weak to stand. 

Fortunately I remembered
a claim made by the ancients: 

way down below can be found
the foundation stone of our being. 

Desperate for security
I then dove
into those unruly waters— 

in search of the stone 
I fought my way down 

and down 

until I felt a calm powerful presence— 

its big ocean bell 
sounded out this message: 

open... 
open up… 
open more! 

From experience I knew: 
inner guidance must be obeyed 
even when the action seems hazardous. 

So I opened my toes 
my hands 
my chest 
my stomach 
my groin 

then opened my eyes
to find myself
standing on that flat stone— 
my feet planted apart
and my arms spread wide
for balance, for balance
as I surfed
over waves of soil and sand. 

A victory, yes 
but I must admit 
now, years later
I still tremble with tension.
But when a little becomes too much
I refuse to shut down— 
no, I open more 
and go with the motion.

In that way
I manage to stand strong 
and ride the waves
of this incredible ocean storm.

How I Learned to Surf

I claim to be a novelist, poet, essayist, cartoonist, graphic artist, peace monger--and I'm trying to be a world citizen. As for my backstory...let's just say I've lived and worked all over the United States.  I'm self-taught, for the most part, which is like stumbling around blindfolded while looking for the right door.  It's an on-going process. Lacking any true musical ability, I try to make music with language, while also making meaning.  

How I Learned to Surf

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