Not This (24/02/2022) by Irina

My heart is bleeding, worn and torn
Do not resuscitate
I don’t know where I am from
In a crisis state

Believed in better, trusted lies
At least I had some pride
But now, a war before my eyes
The terror bona fide

Unsure of my identity
What will keep me safe
Culture losing sanctity
Digging its own grave

Hypocrisy and bitter crime
“Civilians won’t be harmed”
Strangled by the darkest time
The Earth – shaken, alarmed

Although I’m not responsible
I’m feeling shame and guilt
I thought it wasn’t possible
But they grabbed the hilt

A slash, another, children scream
Displaced by politicians
God, let this be an awful dream
Inhumane conditions

My heart is bleeding, worn and torn
I cannot bear to witness
Generations not yet born
Never seeing kindness

Endless sanctions, tensions, greed
Fighting one another
Nothing’s ever been agreed
Upon I now discover

Who am I? Afraid to ask
Powerless, that’s what
Distance is no easy task
Cannot stay afloat

A ghost has occupied my place
Emotions go to slumber
Cannot bear to see my face
While fields shall burn to umber

Aggression, a cold-blooded act
But real blood will be spilled
How many people won’t know home
How many will be killed

Historical event, God, no
Don’t want to live through this
My heart is broken, all time low
Not this, not this, not this


Music in background: 
Cello Concerto by Edward Elgar I. Adagio - Moderato
Royal Philharmonic Orchestra
Maria Kliegel, cello
Michael Halasz, conductor

Not This

Nach einer tiefen Krise habe ich diesen Song geschrieben... er ist nicht in eine Schublade zu stecken und sicher nicht kommerziell... sondern erzählt die Gefühle dieser Zeit. Mit Midi und Magixsoftware arrangiert... der überwiegende Teil ist aus Soundpools "gebastelt" aber das machen sogar die "großen" oder? Soweit mir möglich habe ich selbst eingespielt... Text und Arrangement, Komposition ist alles Tingel... danke für den Mitschnitt MK... Du bist der größte... freue mich, wenn es ein paar von Euch gefällt... Tingel

Noch immer

Word and Music by Stefan van Walsum
All Instruments by Stefan van Walsum
Mix and Master by Nandi´s Cavern Studio, Kerpen Germany

FIRST SNOW (Lyrics)
Verse 1
I said; hey Doctor,
 I don`t feel fine.
I do not drink
 and I never get high! 
Verse 2
You are a university graduate.
Wearing the white coat.
What do you recommend?
I´m sure you`re a clever and wise man. 
Verse 3
Please send me to rehab.
Or what should I do?
I'm going round in circles.
I can't find peace for me too.
Verse 4
I'm not drunk.
I am sober.
I don't do drugs.
I hate the stuff.
Do you have anything that does the trick?
Give it to me!
Pre-Chorus 1
It must be good if you recommend it!
I fell for it.
I trusted him.
It's hard to believe.
Bad medicine, it was like my first snow. 
Verse 5
Good that I am strong.
I know it was so wrong.
I am so scared.
Practically I took snow!
Verse 6
I can't sue him.
His intentions good.
Still, I feel betrayed.
He gave me the first snow.
Practically he gave me snow.
Pre-Chorus  2
It must be good if you recommend it!
I fell for it.
I trusted him.
It's hard to believe.
Bad medicine, it was like my first snow. 
Bridge
Now I will feel very bad.
I will always be sceptical.
From today and forever, no more trust.
I can hardly believe what has happened.  
It blows my mind. 
Blows my mind……
Outro
Oh no Doctor!
You gave me snow!
Oh no Doctor!
You gave me snow!
It blows my mind.
It blows my mind.
He gave me snow.

First Snow

A song about getting older...

Words

Do you feel it          (my doctor)
Are you seeing it    (my optometrist)
Are you comfortable       (nurse)
Or are you trying too hard      (everyone)

Do you know it            (the whereabouts of anything I own) 
You sure don't show it    (expressionless face, probably indicates low battery in hearing aids)
Some days are charmed      (dreaming)
Some days are numb           (reality)

It's just another day

Are you still with me        (watching tv)
Have you drifted off        (still watching tv)
Are you feeling the love     (a distant memory)
You've got to keep on going     (everyone; usually pointing me in an opposite direction)

Do you feel the blood           
Coursing through your veins     (yes, slow trickle)
Or are you just sitting down      (knee is jammed, can't get up)
And watching time go       (definitely not, couldn't find my watch)

It's just another day
Oh yeah

Break

Ooh It's just another day
Yeah It's just another day
Ooh it's just another day

Do you want to
Carry on                    
Or have you given up    ((finding anything I'm looking for, yes)
It's time to shuffle off   (darn knee)

Just smile
Put your sunglasses on (if I can find the bloody things)
To hide the scars           
And hide your pain

Oooh it's just another day
Oooh yeah it's just another day

Just Another Day

Words

I've been flipping through the pages
In a book of memories
Reading all the stories
About the places I have been
It's hard to live in these times
Just gets so complicated
I find it hard, find it hard to breathe
I find it so hard to breathe
And I wish I could fly away
To the place called Long Ago

My heart feels old
Too old for these times
Every time I open my mouth I'm wrong
Every time I'm seen I'm judged
Wish I could fly away
Fly away from this place
Fly to the place called Long Ago
To the place called Long Ago

And I wish I could fly away
To the place called Long Ago
Wish I could fly away
To the place called Long Ago

Break

Every time I open my eyes
I see something new
That's when I realise
I'm a long long way from you
So I go back to my book
My book of memories
Slowly turning the pages
And I start to breathe
Then I start to dream

Yes I wish I could fly away to the place called Long Ago
Yes I wish I could fly away to the place called Long Ago
Yes I wish I could fly away to the place called Long Ago

The Place Called Long Ago

Lyrics and Musik: Stefan van Walsum
All Instruments, Vocals and Arrangement: Stefan van Walsum
Mix and Mastering by Nandi´s Cavern Studio, Germany

Holy Rock and Roll

Holy Rock And Roll

Donald and me did this one a while back. Donald provided the guitar track and my inspiration for the rest came from his stellar work.
Remixed and remastered.

Because of You (Donald Bell collab)

Words

A story about a workplace brain crash...

Artwork: a photo of a full blood moon I took in November 2022 with my iPhone.

Well I don't wanna be where I went before
'cause the odour in that place knocks me down to the floor
It ain't real cool being down and out
I gotta stay away so I don't flip out
Everywhere you go and everywhere you wanna be
You know I just wanna be free

Well I don't want to be in the sun no more
It just ain't good for my skin and it burns me to the core
So I will stay in the shade and keep on out of the light
'cause I know I'll be good with it
Even if it takes all my life

I said hey, I said hey, I said hey, I said hey, I said hey, hey hey hey

Oh will you do this and can you do that
I said yes yes yes yes
And will you drop everything you're doing, just for me
I said yes yes yes and yes
But wait there is more I want you to do
I should've said no
Yes yes yes

Small break

Well everything you say is quite true
It's not only the sun that will burn you
Look over your shoulder left and right
I hope you can get some sleep tonight

I said hey, ah hey hey, I said hey, ah hey hey

No Sun

River Blue

We had a nice jam based on Alpha-roots "Fragile" https://soundcloud.com/alpha-roots/fragile
I'm happy to be part of this collab, Alphio and Jörg. Thank you very much guys!!! :-))))
Alphio: Composition, bass, keys, drums  https://soundcloud.com/alpha-roots
Jörg: Tenor saxophone + final mix  https://soundcloud.com/joerxworx
Andreas: guitars

Acid Jazz Jam - Collab with Alpha Roots + joerxworx

I'm a german guitarist who always wants to play better than he can *lol*. I love the sound of the guitar and I love guitars, their beauty and their smell. Never can get enough.
I wanted to make music since I was a little kid. I urgently wanted a guitar since the age of 10, I think. Unfortunately I got my first (classic) guitar not until the age of 18 because there was not enough money to buy one earlier. Well, since I've got my first guitar I nearly play every single day one of my darlings ;-).
Making my music public on the cloud is really a great thing for me. I love this community. Such fantastic musicians here...
I'm always interested in collaborating with talented musicians.
Thank's for visiting my page, hope you enjoy and don't forget: Music is everything!! Music is love!!! Without music, mankind would never exist anymore!!!!!!!!!

A NOTE TO ALL FOLLOWERS who only follow to get a refollow and then unfollow. Take a  warmhearted FUCK YOU!!! No like for a like, no refollow for a follow here.  I'll like what I like and I'll follow those who convinced me with their music!!!!

Cheers, Andreas

Acid Jazz Jam - Collab with Alpha Roots + joerxworx

Andreas Kloppenburg