https://noranygard.bandcamp.com/album/the-ghosts-beneath-our-feet

you spent your first year gone inside electricity
flying through Mom, knocking her off her feet
what did you do to my throat?
whispering my name in my ear like a ghost

boys I can smell the salt
we must be so close
the fog in Port Orford
like a veil of smoke

age of action in a big red van
we couldn’t go any further west if we tried
I know I seem like I’m somewhere else
but you’re the only reason I’m left alive

the blood borders the flame 
gasoline your hands soak and wring and shake
a desperate head with eyes erased
turned in you speak yourself goodbye reverberate

when I look into water I see God
if we’re made in your image then why not

small rewards for staying alive
faders & peace. Flint in their teeth
I’ve spent thousands of hours of this life of mine
in dresses in my sleep

it’s been ten years since I've seen you
now you’re younger than me, you couldn't understand why
why I had taken so long to come visit
you didn’t know you’d died

the sky wisps underneath itself
small voices out the window
pizza and beer on the lawn
I wanna be a mom

I always dreamed of dying by the ocean
in the grass by the edge of a cliff
sit with the clear blue sky
take my dose and sink

when you are alone
when you are in pain
you can hear me in the wind
you can feel me in the rain

Dad slept right by your crib
little lungs wheezing out and in
she walked on water that Wednesday
I held her foot until we flooded the stage

this is where we sat and watched
as the thunderstorm rolled in
but you were alone
yeah I was alone
and maybe that’s the only way I could ever be happy

I’m not here. Everything is a dream. The present doesn’t exist. I don’t recognize my hands, legs, face, or voice as my own. My vision is blurry. I don’t hear or see things normally. Everything is hazy. I blank out. I’m not here. I blank out. I’m not here.

serving size fireball in the dirt outside the church.
when you kill the rabbit you become the curse.
I wanna leave but I can’t god dammit.
he takes off my clothes and tells me it’s magic.

at thirteen years, I could tell that you knew
is this the last time I’ll be seeing you?
I could feel the love in your eyes
I know it hurts. I want you to be alright

sweet angel, do you remember how you had to leave
the basement where you sank below my feet
the vomit and the pain and the shit on the bed
wherever you are now, I hope you can forget

my hands are dripping with empty answers
the summer after fell like a ransom
we’re all so lonesome in your kingdom
I can’t feel anything

when you are alone
when you are in pain
I can hear you in the wind
I can feel you in the rain

washed in golden light, I watch you
disappear down the storm drain
burn you away in the middle of your lake
damned to dream of your face

—

Produced in the Vampire Castle by Nora Nygard.

Little Sisyphus | NN039

Rain

Rose Knapp (‡Starving Poet§) is an experimental poet & sound artist. She is trans & nonbinary. 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈

Artistically self taught, she creates chaotic, radiant, fragmented, fractal fusions of musique concrète, electronica, techno, sound poetry, & sound art.

She has LP's & EP's released with D.M.T. Records, Far East Sound, Always Human Tapes, Aa3 Corp & others.

mostly reposts & playlists | liked playlists are mostly 2listen2 l8r

AKA @ecokudzu

qo2u5348nuy49uerf9wenuotp45u4fo3biutp98JJJBI JJAJF3@!!GJDSF vvMDMKWKDWNOFAPGANG

Minecraft's 'warden' represents Moloch, Canaanite god/act of child sacrifice. Since the zombie pigman was changed to piglin, it's now supposed to be Legion, Biblical demon/lilin that possesses a horde of pigs. Netherite represents Saturn, which is as close as satanists think they can get their precious nominal figure into the Roman/astrological mythos. "Sculk" & "Moloch" both equal 396 in English gematria. This symbolism was introduced in Java versions 1.16, 1.18, & 1.19 -> 9/11. 18=6+6+6, which is the same rhythm as the "warden"'s heartbeat.

link to infograph is out-of-date. on mobile, will update later.

Rain

nora nygard