I don't always focus on what's really said when I listen to songs, listened to this one several time and i thought it was my favorite of the album, then I listened carefully and it hit so fking hard :(  My parents decided to be a foster care when I was 6, so from a very young age i'm aruond children and teenagers that have kind of similar stories which makes it even more powerful to me. It is still my favorite and by far

musical goals 🤘🤘🤟  this shit brought up a Lotta shit id been locking away

oh my god wow this song is so deep on so many levels this is some deep stuff you're an amazing person I just want you to know that and whatever you have been through never let it affect you you're so amazing so many ways I'm so glad you're still here

4such a sad song to feel sweet and really quite warm is straight up magic 😭😂😅😁

late comment but i resonate so hard to this i know how you feel keep ur head up 💜

Enjoy.

Lyrics:


Pre Chorus

When my friend died, shit that really changed me
They all move on, they all actin shady
So I don't wanna grow up
I don't wanna act tough
Been through hell so many times
But I won't ever give up

Chorus

Yeah, I had enough
I been going so hard since "When I Was Young"
Yeah, I'm goin up
Goin up
Cover skin with tattoos cuz I don't give a fuck
Yeah, you're so in love 
So in love
When they see me gloing up, they're gonna wanna say wassup

Bridge

Ohh, where did I go?
Where did I go? (x2)

Verse

They did you dirty yes I know
I've felt so cold, I've been so broke
I know I don't do what I'm told
That's why I stand here all alone (x2)

Give Up

Give Up (prod. Taurs & IOF)

worst days (prod. sorrow bringer & born hero)

blue dress (prod.timeless)

tragic (prod. cobalt)

reset (leave me alone)[prod. living puff]

i love it when you uWu *noahmadethiss*

i like you a lot w/ lovespelledbackwards (prod. tunnA Beatz)

nova:
i never thought i'd ever want anybody's touch
i thought i needed myself and that would be enough
everyday you come back home and i just wanna fuck
and afterwards i tell you that im so fuckin in love with you

its deja vu
i been known you
and even after all this time
the butterflies are still alive

cause i really like-

i am in love with the sound of your voice
when we're in bed, "i said keep makin noise"
when we get started, dont want it end
so when we get done, we gon' do it again

i really like the way you hold me and hug me
and really like the way you choke me and love me
i really like the way you think that im hot
i know that you know it but babe, i like you a lot

i really like the way you kiss on my neck
and i really like the way grip on my breasts
i really like the way you tell me im hot
i know that you know it but babe, i like you a lot

(1:47)lovespelledbackwards
i like you
to anyone for you i’d give my life to

& maybe that’s a bit overdramatic
but when i’m with u i swear that its magic
tell me what ur thinkin
say what’s on ur mind
lifes a lil better when i have u by my side

i love it when u hold me close
i love it when i feel ur touch
you know i want u the most
yea i need u like the drugs

nova:
i really like the way you hold me and hug me
and really like the way you choke me and love me
i really like the way you think that im hot
i know that you know it but babe, i like you a lot

i really like the way you kiss on my neck
and i really like the way grip on my breasts
i really like the way you tell me im hot
i know that you know it but babe, i like you a lot

i am in love with the sound of your voice
and when we're in bed i said, "keep makin noise"
when we get started, dont want it end
so when we get done, we gon' do it again

i am in love with all our conversations
when we in bed i said, "who we creatin?"
when we get started, dont want it end
so when we get done, we gon' do it again

i really like the way you hold me and hug me
and really like the way you choke me and love me
i really like the way you think that im hot
i know that you know it but babe, i like you a lot

i really like the way you kiss on my neck
and i really like the way grip on my breasts
i really like the way you tell me im hot
i know that you know it but babe, i like you a lot

i like you a lot. w/ lovespelledbackwards (prod. tunnA Beatz)

you got me obsessed yea you got me feelin upset
i dont want the sex yea just let me in your head
i been feelin depressed im just tryna get ahead
i aint my in my right mind, my heart's been broke in two but I still love you
and of course i want it to work but how can i trust you
yea you left me all alone so i put it in a song
i been on the road now i been doin shows

i been goin through thangs that nobody fuckin knows
runnin up my debts yea im in the fuckin hole
i cant fuckin breathe feels like im in chokehold
lately you been so cold i dont wanna let this go
fuck i changed my mind i just wanna go home
and thats with you 
my hearts with you  

you got me obsessed yea you got me feelin upset
i dont want the sex yea just let me in your head
i been feelin depressed im just tryna get ahead
i aint my in my right mind, my heart's been broke in two but I still love you
and of course i want it to work but how can i trust you
yea you left me all alone so i put it in a song
i been on the road now i been doin shows
i been tryna grow tryna get it on my own
i dont do well when im left on my own

i been on the road yeah 
i be getting dough now
she lays under my blanket when she comes around
i lost a ton of friends when i left my home town
it be in the morning when i come back home now

i just want the sex it's scary being in your head
i get what i deserve i can never be upset
when i see your scars i think of the blood you shed
i'll make sure you become okay

you got me obsessed yea you got me feelin upset
i dont want the sex yea just let me in your head
i been feelin depressed im just tryna get ahead
i aint my in my right mind, my heart's been broke in two but I still love you
and of course i want it to work but how can i trust you
yea you left me all alone so i put it in a song
i been on the road now i been doin shows
i dont want you now why don't you leave me alone

obsessed ft. noxiousnights (irby x pekarot)

death

song is out on all plats too <3
feat @autumndropsdead
prod @jolst @pekarot_161
cover art www.instagram.com/zaperwave

lyrics:
[Intro: autumndropsdead]
Break me apart, I'll probably like it anyways
Dirt in my heart, was the cause of the heavy weight
Living ain't smart, but it's better than eternal pain
With the way that I'm feeling right now, there'd be no way

[Chorus: autumndropsdead]
Hot water pours down my head like it's procaine
I just dust off the rust, while they're still all joking
You hope that they notice, it's hopeless, you know it
I've lost grasp, will I get it back?

[Verse 1: autumndropsdead]
My only consolations momentary to my past
I reach out, both my arms, but the sky won't do it back
Let it go, lay to waste, I may not be here tomorrow
Every day feels delayed, bitch, I feed off of the sorrow 

[Verse 2: heroine diaries]
Shits not a movie, this my real life man my old girl is a groupie 
They wonder if I'm okay, I don't know I say it loosely 
I just ran out of Percs, need some more before I'm moody
They can kill me that's the beauty 
Sober days, no cannot relate 
Ex mad, yeah, get out my face 
Can't talk she busy at raves 
Laced pills, yeah, they are my favs 
Death soon, oh, this is a race 
Not worth the stress, she in love with the chase 
In an out, I ain't leavin' a trace 
Crackin' cards, but beatin' my case 
Don't wanna talk about it, don't wanna think about it 
Now you stalkin' on my page, I know you read about it 
She still playin' all my songs, she think she slick about it
And I'm never goin' rehab makin' sure about it

[Chorus: autumndropsdead]
Hot water pours down my head like it's procaine
I just dust off the rust, while they're still all joking
You hope that they notice, it's hopeless, you know it
I've lost grasp, will I get it back?

[Verse 3: autumndropsdead]
The tide casts I can feel you tugging on my heart
It's getting colder, hold her
It was a set up from the start
Hold it still, steady pace, but it never works out
My wrists break from the rain as I fall to the ground

[Outro: heroine diaries & autumndropsdead]
I've been up for two whole days 
I can't sleep blow out my brain 
Xanny bars help numb the pain 
Need your love right in my veins

procaine (feat. autumndropsdead) (prod. jolst & pekarot)

prod. metlast x sor
mix: me
master: teddyboi (@yoimn3ver)
art: my girlfriend <3

lyrics:

close, but i can’t finish it
just know, that i don’t wanna be close tonight
when im at home, i feel the pain sink in
bottle after bottle after bottle down my throat 

know, that i can’t let go, this simply
of something that took time to put together
but clearly these bonds have been severed

don’t get too close, you’ll let the pain in
frost lands on my nose, it’s come im shaking
she knows, that she shouldn’t get close
but it’s freezing 

3 in the morning
i should be sleeping but im not
this anxiety has got its grip on me
this is something you won’t see
cause you’re caught up in a dream
so far away from the disease
im begging im down im on my knees
for someone to save me
but no one’s here lately 

close, but i can’t finish it
just know, that i don’t wanna be close tonight
when im at home, i feel the pain sink in
bottle after bottle after bottle down my throat

know, that i can’t let go, this simply
of something that took time to put together
but clearly these bonds have been severed

don’t get too close, you’ll let the pain in
frost lands on my nose, it’s come im shaking
she knows, that she shouldn’t get close
but it’s freezing

now you see me
now you don’t
now i’m gone and missing
you shouldn’t have gotten close

worst days (prod. sorrow bringer & born hero)

nova garden

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