SidewayzSittinFtXnSmoke(Prod.Yano)

Fucking drowning in my doubt
Thoughts behind a cloud 
Self hatred leaking through the mouth 
Feel like I’m fading 
My dopamine is out

Looking for some shit to fill the void before I blow my mind out 
Out goes my pain
Shout for help until my hope is drained
Bowing to the thought of change but I doubt I’ll go anywhere but south

Going only south even though I’m from the north
Winter ice crystals keeping cutting me like a fucking sword 
My skin is turning blue from the cold that I’ve absorbed 

I told my demons I can’t take this internal war 
They want my blood to pour
They handed a .44
They want to see to see me as a corpse, on my failures keeping score
Want my blood to pour 
Handed a .44
Want to see to see me as a corpse, on my failures keeping score

I’m climbing to the peak I’m falling on my knees 
I’m hoping at least my mind will stop, as time is running on the clock
This world grows cold as I get old and I can’t control all my fucking thoughts
Tryna reach the summit of my brain but I’m dodging rocks 
Demons at the top inducing serotonin drops
My back at the door, while my demons fucking knock
Can’t open it once again, please someone get the glock

I’m waking baking every day to save me from my fucking brain 
Take me to my fucking grave, I feel like I’m wasting space 
Never slowing down the brakes, but never wanna meet my fate
But every day I’m meeting face with my final days if I don’t change my fucking ways 

Turning into a disaster not a master of my own self 
Falling faster, I’m the captor and the pastor of my own hell 
Dwelling and I’m yelling out my mental health 
And my trauma released with every word I spell

Don’t know if my soul will ever be whole
Don’t know if my soul will ever be whole

Pounding the Ice As I Freeze in Frigid Waters

Pounding The Ice As I Freeze In Frigid Waters

Fake fucks popping my phone
I told them to leave me alone 
Just wanna zone out, pull the trichomes out
Making these beats in my home 
Sit next to a tombstone
Nothing but skull and some bones 
Existence unknown now
Feel like I’m not home now, 
In my own dome I’m feelin like I’m thrown out
Wasted my Pennies on making a wish
My body’s blazing in the River Styx
Holy shit I’m having a bad trip 
How much was that tab dipped?
Can’t go any lower 
I feel mediocre 
The storm getting closer
I’m thinking it’s over
The only boat roller, no captain, no chief or controller
I’m stranded in sea as a loner 

Leave me alone

Hyperventilate, then I isolate
Never wanna show my fucking face 
Body is a temple every day I desecrate, meditate, then I burn it all down with my hate 
The irony’s great 
I laugh as it burns standing over the grave 
I’m afraid of who I became 
No escaping this cage, I’m a slave to my brain
Pouring the blood down the drain 
Physically mentally ache 
Out of my way, destructive path that I pave 
Debating my fate every day I’m awake 
Oblivion, thinking of words they’ll engrave 
Stabbing my back with the words that they say
Turning to ash as my legacy fades
My shoulders are bruised from the weight 
I’m straying further away 
Damage my brain until nothing remains
Caught up in a rage, demons tell me to behave 
there’s nothing to be gained if you speak of my name 
I’ll be unlocking my demons from chains 
I’ll be throwing raw meat in their cage 
Eyes so dried up, cried up, looking so red like I’m sprayed with mace
Don’t wanna die this way, but I’m still fucking taking your life away

Smoky Quartz

Driving to the coast, feeling like a ghost
Never do the most
Cutting throats
Get me high cuz I want the highest dose
But every toke is making the reaper more close
Running from the fate you chose, but I see you in my scope
You don’t know until you froze, now I wait for you to decompose
I don’t know 
Feeling slow
Rolling dope
Pennywise would be proud of the way that I float 
Money fucking falls
Call the bank there’s nothing in the vault 
Wish that I could have a house like Aaron Paul 
Wish that something in this life wasn’t fucking false 
Demons standing tall over the broken line of salt
Every room call me the fucking black sheep  
Got wool on my eyes and I can’t see 
I’m the banshee, eyes red from the tears that I fucking weep

To my dome, put it, put it to my dome
Midnight goldstone  
Put it, put it, put it to my dome
To my dome, put it, put it to my dome
Midnight goldstone  
Put it, put it, put it to my

Lately I’ve been going through some shit that makes me stay in bed 
I don’t wanna do another day of feeling dread
Feeling heavy like lead
Everyone left me on read 
Demons saying fuck em all you’ll be better off dead 
Hanging from a thread 
Overfed my head
Fork and knife consuming all my negative thoughts instead 
Looking in the infrared, see the spirits of the dead 
Every day I bend backwards but it’s not enough they said
I’ll be in the dirt where the maggots are 
I’ll be in my room just watching avatar 
What the fuck you talking for, who the fuck is you?
I just wanna make a beat and snack like Scooby Doo
Dump my body in the ocean but I float ashore
Try to bargain with the devil but he wants more
I shook his hand and put it to my dome,
float up to a galaxy that looks like midnight goldstone

Money fucking falls
Call the bank there’s nothing in the vault 
Wish that I could have a house like Aaron Paul 
Wish that something in this life wasn’t fucking false 
Demons standing tall over the broken line of salt

Midnight Goldstone

Body rotting but I have a plot
Take ‘em to the ocean and I dump em off a yacht 
Red and blue flashing, know I’m fucking caught 
Put my hands in the air, and my knees dropped 
Now I watch the days go by, I’m sitting in a cell
Never see a blue sky but tell my fam I’m doing well 
Made mistakes and I made my own hell 
Recurring dreams where I’m burning in a fucking plane that fell
Tired of fake fucking people never having my back
Tired of days turning to weeks where sleep lacks
Tired of smoking weed just to relax 
I don’t wanna feel this shit until my body is ash 

Rose made of palm, rose like a phoenix 
Came back as a demon but nobody fucking 
see it
Invisible, miserable, now I’m spewing stupid syllables 
Not loveable 
Not liveable 
If anything I’m fucking killable
I’m despicable 
Life feeling like an SAT, but I’m not quizzable
Unpredictable, 
Second guessing everything is typical 
solving problems to the minimal 
Smoking chemicals 
Fucking killable
I’m despicable 
Life feeling like an SAT, but I’m not quizzable
Unpredictable, 
Second guessing everything is typical 
Solving problems to the minimal 
Smoking chemicals

Recurring Dreams

Lil Netzero Cruise Control

SPACE DREAM

NEW ERA

Panic setting, panic lurking
Someone close the curtain 
I’m betting that I keep on hurting
Smoking back to back, I’m burning
Made by Burton, I’m not real, animated clay person
Dig my hole and lay and wait for someone to throw the fucking dirt in
And I’m waking devastated when I’m thinking bout the body bags 
Visit mental graves so I’m always wearing fucking black 
Staying late up thinking and I’m breaking down from panic attacks 
Taking your reality and throwing it in the fucking trash 
I’m so numb that nothing can shake me 
Made it past the point of breaking
Brain is feeling like it’s caving
Mind and body aching 
Limbs shaking, head racing,
I’m debating my coffin or my cremation, gotta choose a place for my remains to lay in 


Made by Burton, animated clay person
Dig my hole and lay, throw the fucking dirt in


I can never rest in piece, never hittin REM during sleep
I’m internalizing deep, getting weak
My dreams are nightmares where I can’t speak, shadows climbing on my chest, grabbing my throat and choking me 
Try to scream but all I can do is weep
How long does it take to feel normal again?
I’m spending every day waiting for the day to end 
I’m on game seven with my demons and I can’t defend 
I’m transcending into heaven, from this life I was condemned 
I’m a fallen angel like I’m Lucifer, toss me into the lake
And I realize Hell is painful as I’m going up in flames 
I abandon all hope when I reach the gates
Now I’m the king of demons and they’re feeding me grapes

PANIC

Tokyo Girls

Tokyo Nights (prod. je$ter)

"Moonlit Murmurs: Stories from the Creek"

Seeing all red
Spreading the ash all over my dread
But I tread and get some gas and blunts before I go to bed 
Looking undead I bet all of this is in my head 
I never even left, I might just end it with the lead 

I’m dabbing the oils and I boil like I’m fried chicken 
And I throw them in the water right after I fucking stick em 
Oceanash risen from the Atlantic sea 
I’m in the bayou hanging from a fucking old Cypress tree
I'm lighting fire to the fucking palm leaves 
I’m getting higher as my skin melts into the heat
I’m in the open ocean and coping I’m throwing emotions of grief 
I’m sleeping in, I wish I wasn’t me 

I’m in the south, the roaches crawling out my mouth 
I’m always fucking filled with doubt, so please just wrap me in a shroud
I’m crouching in a fucking cloud
I’m snapping when they shake me out 
Death is what all I’m about
I’m turning your flesh all inside out

Better watch your step 
I’m not the one you should betray
In the water to your neck 
Kicking away the stingrays 
Kayaking in the creek 
Please just let me rest in piece 
Please just fucking leave me be 
Burn me like a DVD

Water clear, willows near 
Demons whisper in my ear
I feel the reaper coming near 
I'm dreaming of all my fucking fears 
I’m feeling fried, red in my eyes, I'm going for a ride and then I hop out, make ‘em die, you can try to run and fucking hide 

Put the bodies in the barrels, fill em with formaldehyde 
Stash em in the marsh and then I come up with an alibi
Put the bodies in the barrels, fill em with formaldehyde 
Stash em in the marsh and then I come up with an alibi

Woods is where I scheme 
Smoking the green, crime scene where I clean 
Feeling mean, get the n-i-c-o-t-i-n-e
Now I'm walking with a limp, eating shrimp
You can get a glimpse of the clip
I cannot wash my sins 
Cutting limbs 
Putting them into fucking bins
Slice you into pieces thin
Grinning as I rip your skin


Produced by oceanash

Moonlit Murmurs: Stories from the Creek

-negative music-
GLOOM ⛓
GREY - @grey_official
CRI$I$ 333 - @crisis333
Cyrazami - @cyrazami
Nightraverse -@nightraverse

Midnight Goldstone

oceanash

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Garcia Kaitlyn

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