"Trips are like experiences we learn from that help us open the portal into our minds. Each trip is an adventure, not only through the world and the universe, but also an introspective journey through the vast landscape of our mind. Each trip is a test that helps us learn and explore these places. I present to you my journey, my trips, my tests. Enjoy."

This is my first fully self-produced album that I've spent the better part of two years working on. The making of this album itself has been a trip itself, so many scrapped songs, so many ideas that I couldn't execute properly, so many lessons that I've learned - both for producing and in the real world - but I couldn't be happier with the final result.

This album has everything I've wanted to make in it, whether it be just generic hyperpop, glitchy experimental production, an EDM drop, or a full metalcore breakdown, it has it all and I'm so happy I was able to make it still sound fluid and solid. 

I couldn't have made this album without the help of many friends, so here's a brief list of the people who helped this album come to shape:
Rosie
Nick
Ivan
Angel
Zion
James
River
BLCKK
Flowr
HXSTAGE
And anyone else I showed this album to as it was being created. This wouldn't have been possible without you all, so thank you.

TRIPS//TESTS

trips//tests

cant write you off as a mishap
when you hit my phone i didn't get that
but with every other time you had
did you even really want to try again

pick apart the little messages i sent you
took my heart and didnt try to rip it in two
when i started i thought that i could see right thru
now i know that i knever knew what i would do

when you
]left
im up, set
no limit
never
knew what
to get
now its fucked
feelin like im outta luck
push it just little bit more, but its stuck

and its all a test
wish i never saw you again
but i need that feelin now
please read aloud
what flees out ur mouth
1245, lazy avenue
come thru around 9, with the attitude
obtuse, fuck u, never had a clue
wana take a cruise, from the useless battles you
fight for no damn reason its the end
outta spite make the best damn thing outta lead
never write like this when im out, its the best
guess i like being inside all thru the day
EH eh
and its the fallout
eh eh
when i call out
eh eh
what do i talk about
u just talk loud
didnt think youd walk out

mishap

Intro (NOVÂFLED)

Roster w/ Miind (NOVÂFLED)

Theres just one thing I need to come to terms with
And thats the fact that
I will never not hate
Who I am

Ive been debating about
Whether I should end it all
Its when my education ends when
I will take my fall

Its when my education ends when
I will take my life!
Maybe I wouldnt if these
Motherfuckers opened
Their eyes

The fuck is wrong with me
I read your emotions like
Im hearing a 
Soliloquy

I can tell you hate me because
You always avoiding me
I can tell you hate the way I act
Because you shit on me  

Everyday!
I start to feel some more pain
Everthings stale its the same
People believe what you say

Because youre okay
STOP BEING SO FAKE

STOP BEING SO FAKE


Am I in hell?
Is everything just a
Story ill tell


Should I sell
My crumbling soul?
That way ill live in my dream
And ill make my way out of this hole

Theres no such thing as a 
Merciful god
Your lord is a tyrant
He’ll make the world flood

If theres a god then 
Why did he choose me
Why did he make the world
So unforgiving

STOP BEING SO FAKE
STOP BEING SO FAKE

AMYGDALA

STOP BEING SO FAKE!

STOP BEING SO FAKE! (PROD. TRIPLESIXDELETE)

c minor vocal test

test results - 

Fuck C minor
chicken spot drop my glock in the sauce its too hot to get out>

CHICKEN SPOT

*</3~.tell me im pretty or maybe that im god.~</3*

Cover art by: @numbskullz_x3 ig + me

Lyrics:
Tell me that I'm pretty, or maybe that I'm god
Tell me that I'm special, or something that I'm not
Say it to my face, Right to my eyes
Say it without truth, and I will start to cry

Tell me that you hate me, that's no surprise
Seeing people suffer, brings glee to my eye
I smile big but, this is a façade
Get out my way, "Prepare to meet thy god"

I hate myself, and all I see is red
Creep into my room and see that I'm not fed
See me in chains, this is where I'm kept
I'm such a shame, why was I bred

So much pain this is what I felt
Look at my life, decreasing mental health
Looking at my options, I'm facing death
Breath my last breaths, put the gun to my neck

Tell me that I'm pretty, or maybe that I'm god
Tell me that I'm special, or something that I'm not
Say it to my face, Right to my eyes
Say it without truth, and I will start to cry

Tell me that you hate me, that's no surprise
Seeing people suffer, brings glee to my eye
I smile big but, this is a façade
Get out my way, "Prepare to meet thy god"

What's the point of going if I don't feel loved
I make a decision, smoke hit my lungs
I lost so much now I don't give a fuck
I hate my life I just wanna give up

What's the point of going if I don't feel loved
I make a decision, smoke hit my lungs
I lost so much now I don't give a fuck
I hate my life I just wanna give up

Tell me that I'm pretty, or maybe that I'm god
Tell me that I'm special, or something that I'm not
Say it to my face, Right to my eyes
Say it without truth, and I will start to cry

Tell me that you hate me, that's no surprise
Seeing people suffer, brings glee to my eye
I smile big but, this is a façade
Get out my way, "Prepare to meet thy god"

Tell me that I'm pretty, or maybe that I'm god
Tell me that I'm special, or something that I'm not
Say it to my face, Right to my eyes
Say it without truth, and I will start to cry

Tell me that you hate me, that's no surprise
Seeing people suffer, brings glee to my eye
I smile big but, this is a façade
Get out my way, "Prepare to meet thy god"

tell me im pretty {Maki}

Too Far w/ amarè (shvde)

I just wanna talk way louder than usual
I just want my voice to sound way more beautiful
If it's gonna happen I need a sign
'Cus that would be the best way to spend my life

And if you lost me tonight
You could take my spot and be alright
So put it up, it's easy, like
Just gotta log in and take my spot
I just wanna talk way louder than usual
I just want my voice to sound way more beautiful
If it's gonna happen I need a sign
'Cus that would be the best way to spend my life

And if you told me how
Back then I would've figured it out
I got odd looks shouting
I need another plan, I need some rerouting
You talk way too much
Move blocks, save the bucks
True stuff, label us
Brace me for the patience and my luck
"Oh no he didn't, he just made another rap song"
The fans get livid, they say "you should change the tracks up"
So he starts singing, but it sounds a little jacked up
Save the beat, then come back later
So you can track one
He pulled a fast one, came through with that, bumps
Break off the last song, keep changing, last touch
You can't hide in your bed for much longer
Get up out of there, release it, count the numbers

And if you lost me tonight
You could take my spot and be alright
So put it up, it's easy, like
Just gotta log in and take my spot
I just wanna talk way louder than usual
I just want my voice to sound way more beautiful
If it's gonna happen I need a sign
'Cus that would be the best way to spend my life

"Do you have any other real passions in life outside of music"
"Something that doesn't even have anything to do with it"
"That's- that's something that you hold dear?"
"You know that's a que- you know, I'll get that question a lot"
"And I don't"
"I don't have any, like, other things I do besides music"
"Completely, like, all- that's all I care about"

i want more

These options are giving out
Please talk to me, no reason to shout
I can tell you I walk less now
When I'm out
But that's the other side of the story
No pros inside, got no glory
I'll make a beat or two, but I wont sing for you
The way I see you move
Got my eyes adjusted to it
Now I don't know why I still do it
I'll try to write it, I'm not fluent
Account on private, that feels stupid
But that's the way this shit go
I'm laying a brick road
Can't tell me how to make my own shit, I say so
Give me the new code, 'cus this music stays gold
I'm reppin' "two tones" got my plate and dish loaded

Imma drive a couple hours
So I can turn "us" into "ours"
Stay back for a chemical shower
I say that, 'cus I know what I have encountered
Press a button and it towers onto me
Can't take a second without power, let me breathe
Playback the song we just routed
I hate that you sound better than I do, outed, 'cus

Got used to the changes that you made
But imma play it back, 'cus it's fading
I'll take another shot to erase it
But that don't help me, it just evades it
For a slight amount of time
I can't cry about you online
I wanna try to go rewind
But that's a bad idea to alight
We don't talk, can't sleep on the dot
Just stop it, I feel weak from the plot
And now it's 4AM, got no control again
Reset my phone again
Don't wanna park the Benz, just wanna walk to friends
'Cus when I talk to them, it's not an option to pretend

Try and change the subject
What have you done yet
This isn't fun at all
I can't tell which story that I've got myself on
I need shelter it's pouring, I can't stop here too long

And imma drive a couple hours
So I can turn "us" into "ours"
Stay back for a chemical shower
I say that, 'cus I know what I have encountered
Press a button and it towers onto me
Can't take a second without power, let me breathe
Playback the song we just routed
I hate that you sound better than I do, outed, yuh

playback

"Let me get an actual good song, sorry- sorry- I- I- I'm-"

You think you're so damn cool (So damn cool)
But I hate that fucking face you make when you cry
You play it off like its true (Play it off like it's true)
But you blocked me on everything the very same night
Night
But I make you feel so helpless
Had a date tonight and you felt sick
Your behavior, narcissistic
Fake hesitation, change the subject

You're so aggravating
You drive me fucking crazy
Just go, you know it's the main thing
Change your fucking hair again, your ties are breaking
You're so aggravating
You drive me fucking crazy
Just go, you know it's the main thing
Change your fucking hair again, your ties are breaking

"Man, fuck this bitch, honestly du-"

I bet you can't help but think that this song is about you
You better believe it, I made it for round two
The changing of seasons, helped me to the ground
You wish you could ever see it
I'm never around you
But that's the main thing that you do
You try and make me feel bad, such a fool
Am I insane, please answer truthfully
You'll never believe me, you're a fucking demon

"So just forget it"
"That's an impossibility"

You can't help but find a lie
One more call is all it'll take to want to die
If you think I'm coming back again you're fucked up in the mind
But you did it every night so why don't you go ahead and just cry

You're so aggravating
You drive me fucking crazy
Just go, you know it's the main thing
Change your fucking hair again, your ties are breaking
You're so aggravating
You drive me fucking crazy
Just go, you know it's the main thing
Change your fucking hair again, your ties are breaking

so cool

Pick it up from the top, where'd the minutes go?
I give up on the spot, is it miniscule?
Not now, take five, put your hoodie up
I don't even like to talk, am I good enough
One, wake up, take all that you want to
Two, hate lunch, make something it's up to you
Fake fucks, they won't get a buck for who
What, when, time and place, what's it come to?
You hate all your friends, but it's not fair
You think they'd give in, but you won't share
Patience, places, better get up there
Wait this isn't it, quick get your own chair

Is it not enough? You just made a thousand bucks
Pick it all apart, ticket isn't valuable
Is it not enough? You just made a thousand bucks
Pick it all apart, ticket isn't valuable

All the memories slip into a pipe dream
What's it mean to be? Throw it all beside me
I'll pretend to see what's really enticing
So embarrassing, look at what you're writing
All the memories slip into a pipe dream
What's it mean to be? Throw it all beside me
I'll pretend to see what's really enticing
So embarrassing, look at what you're writing

"Woah woah woah, woah woah"

All I ever thought of was never what I wanted
Place, time, never mattered
You probably never saw it
But you look back and vomit, like was I really honest?
Hate time, you can't handle
You sleep, but you don't want it
Break it into something new
Same shit, what you going to do?
Crazy, what you're turning to
Phase Shift, press the button, blue

Is it not enough? You just made a thousand bucks
Pick it all apart, ticket isn't valuable
Is it not enough? You just made a thousand bucks
Pick it all apart, ticket isn't valuable

All the memories slip into a pipe dream
What's it mean to be? Throw it all beside me
I'll pretend to see what's really enticing
So embarrassing, look at what you're writing
All the memories slip into a pipe dream
What's it mean to be? Throw it all beside me
I'll pretend to see what's really enticing
So embarrassing, look at what you're writing

miniscule

Wait right here, I'm coming right back
My right sleeve got caught and I can't
Think straight, I just need to lie back
Please find something to define that
My mindset got stuck, immobile
Can't fight that, this show is over
List five things that make you whole
Or you can try to breathe, but oh no

What's that coming in? You were just with a friend
Respect, dividend, new build, reel it in

Keep talking, 'cus I think I need it
Plus I'm boutta be on my way
In a week or two, so make me stay
Keep talking, 'cus I think I need it
Plus I'm boutta be on my way
In a week or two, so make me stay

Now that you're okay, I'll break bones 'til I phase my mindstate
Watch out you might hate my place, you find truth the the breaks
Race you to the finish, paced you, couldn't win
It's hateful when you tell me "hey I'm moving in"
And wait you didn't give in, grateful dinners
And I hate you, never sinning, make me give in, and

Keep talking, 'cus I think I need it
Plus I'm boutta be on my way
In a week or two, so make me stay
Keep talking, 'cus I think I need it
Plus I'm boutta be on my way
In a week or two, so make me stay

I don't wanna wait again
You fight to make me stay and yet
Why can't you just let me out
If I just let you, now

subterfuge

Are you sick? Are you dripped? Yeah yeah yeah
Save the pic, flavor it, yeah yeah yeah
Walk around saying this and that
Don't tell me you told everybody that you get the bag

'Cus you a fake fuck, turn it off, you ain't making hits, bruh
I got thousands of dollars under my list of
Who you are and who you wanna be
Yo girl don't wanna rock a beat
Reluctancy to fuckin' tell a sorry cheat
You're way too insecure
Quit making fickle slurs
You're trying way too hard to be the shit, yeah
But imma tell you that shit ain't gon' get you this far

Back, back, back it up now
I see you packing up your bags, wrap it up now
'Cus you ain't going nowhere
You getting no shares
Why would you go there?
All the time, you don't care
You rap about shit but you ain't living it
I see your tracks all the time, got me feeling pissed
Give it up now, wont make a buck now
You talk about that Range Rover but it wont be found
'Cus imma drive through in my Mach-EX
You talk a lot of big game but you wont be next
I'm fucking on that bitch raw, I got no protection
You pull up to the studio but you choke the session
'Cus I hit that bitch, one take, and I send it
My lyrics come from real shit, no pretending
Fucking scrap that new song 'cus it's so pretentious
Pitch your vocals down but your words got no expression

You a fake fuck, turn it off, you ain't making hits, bruh
I got thousands of dollars under my list of
Who you are and who you wanna be
Yo girl don't wanna rock a beat
Reluctancy to fuckin' tell a sorry cheat
You're way too insecure
Quit making fickle slurs
You're trying way too hard to be the shit, yeah
But imma tell you that shit ain't gon' get you this far
Fake fuck, turn it off, you ain't making hits, bruh
I got thousands of dollars under my list of
Who you are and who you wanna be
Yo girl don't wanna rock a beat
Reluctancy to fuckin' tell a sorry cheat

fickle

I'm sick and fed up with this
Try it quick (fuck)
Didn't even help a bit
Give me a second, need some time to come back
Again I've fallen through the cracks
This is all my fault
What else would I want
Think about it, press it real, and pound it
Let it sink in, round it up

I feel it all around
No idea what I have found today
It's like a new experience
And I'll prove I'm serious
I can push you and I am-

Fuck
Maybe I'm crazy, can feel my arms shaking
My heart is penetrating, and the glass feels like it's breaking
Goddamn, will it end?
Keep laying in this bed
Tryna take over my head
I kinda wish that I was d- now
Take your time, yeah, you're wasting mine
But this patient mind will just wait 'til
I'm fucking done with it
I've had enough of this
I'll just give up and quit
Wish I could-
Take a sip

I feel it all around
No idea what I have found today
It's like a new experience
And I'll prove I'm serious
I can push you and I am-

"A person who thinks all the time has nothing to think about except thoughts"
"And so he loses touch with reality"
"It's time to wake up"

Get out, get out (Get the fuck out)
I'm more than upset now, -set now
It's nothing but a feeling
A fucking feeling, feeling, how?
(Come on let's just get-)
It's not nothing, but it isn't something
Fight it, fight it
Find something to confide in, -fide in
Wish that this would fucking finish
Losing my head, night-end
Goddamn what a feeling it would be
To feel like I can finally think straight

"Worrying has no transformative value"
"It is rehearsing the very thing you do not want to happen"

sickness

You don't notice what I want
But I am sure of it, 'cus I can't stop thinking of
How nice it would be
Oh, how nice it could be
But what I really need
Is to fight the pain in me

And I'm so fucking upset
With the fact that nothing is done yet
Make me feel whole again
Take a minute, it's over and out
Patience is adjacent to displacement
Can't help but hate this
Break into my safe it's splayed out for you to take shit

I fear that I might be too late
It's a cycle today
Why me, can't I fight these feelings?
Why do I like these heathens?
Uh, switch it up, maybe you'll like it this time
Yuh, give a buck, for a quick night, to feel right
Yuh, put the substance down the rut, you feel like
Yuh, you might crumble, but it's lovely
Make me sleep out of spite
Reach heavens light
Why is every damn experience held back by the fight
I wish I felt the same I felt when I knocked back a good spike
Think I'd melt if I went back to the resentment I liked
But it makes me alive
Woo! Held back the pain that I lied about
Let's have a hateful time
I'll regret it when I'm around

And I'm so fucking upset
With the fact that nothing is done yet
Make me feel whole again
Take a minute, it's over and out
Patience is adjacent to displacement
Can't help but hate this
Break into my safe it's splayed out for you to take shit

sickness

robo

Recent comments

rosie

sins

sins

sins

Related tracks