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Around midnight I was laying on the roof writing a letter to god asking him to forgive them for they do not know what they do.My parents had done it again left me in that house that they bought when they were married . I was alone, scared and had given up all hope .I wrote a letter to god saying “ Jesus, I love you but I'd rather be dead right now I'm hungry thirsty and don't know what I have done to deserve this. I didn't ask to be here i dont want to steal father god. Is there any kind of way you could bless me so I can make it through the night. Tears began falling down my eyes as I held my letter up to the sky turning it around the opposite direction so god could read it . How did i manage to survive all them nights with nothing to eat i guess it was god .My dad was a drunk and my mom was a prostitute i youst to feel so embarrassed when people said damn your mom talk to every man in town i was still to young to understand but i would listen and never for get . The next day I called my mother and said momma could you bring me something to eat my stomach touching my back. She pulled up in her red ford focus cursing on the phone with someone about some money they owed her. I got in the back seat and tried to look my mom in her eyes through the rear view mirror. I started crying . My mom noticed and said what's wrong . i said mom i havent ate in days yall must didnt love me im only thirteen i didn't ask to be here .She then went on about how she wasn't going to feel sorry for me and she no longer has custody over me . Thinking out of frustration i jumped out the car while it was moving in the middle of town i was tired of living in distress .My mom slammed on brakes got out and came and got me and threw me back in the car .She then took me to mcdonalds and got me something to eat . I was happy again i felt loved again until we went to pick up her friend rod .They was talking while i was in the back seat eating fries next thing you know rod slapped my mom i tried to jump on him but my mom told me to sit down and that she was taking me back to that abandon house .I started crying in silence because i didn't want her to know how weak i was plus i was tired of living in that house with no water or food.my dad still had custody of me at that time my mom didn't want Anything to do with me I got out the car when in the house crying tears with dropping on my French fries asking God why, why am I here laying on the floor looking at the ceiling what can I do to help myself I never got an answer from God then a big storm came I was scared all alone by myself while it was lightning and thunder I began to put the pillow over my head to cover up my ear also my eyes to because I didn't want to see the lightning strikes After the Storm was over I would watch the news and try to do anything to take my mind off what I was going through.
The next day I managed to go to school the bus would come pick me up in the morning but I wasn't going to school to learn I was going to school to eat my parents divorce had caused me to act out a lot so I will be in after school detention and ISS I wasn't aware of the way I was acting I was more hurt looking for answers for why am I being treated the way I am I will come to school even if I was suspended and stay in the bathroom all day because I needed to go to lunch I ended up getting caught then my mom would have to come get me .

live life.succeed and believe. dont stop the grind

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