1 in 4 trillion to be Alive at the same time as otuka

I love you jerran Townsel I know you see this marry me

"hanging by a thread"

produced by elavy

lyrics:

I've been tryna change my ways, not lose my faith
if I don't take the step, then I'll just stay the same
staring at a screen to get through night and day
it's hard to keep my confidence in fucking place
i know you wonder where I've been and why I left so long
a place that's stuck in time and clocks are wrong
the sun don't shine and birds don't sing along
upside down and nothing's where it belongs

self destruct or fix me up?
do I tear the seams or stitch em up?
if I cut the thread, I'm close enough to the edge to end what I've begun but I can never do that

maybe I'm clueless
ignorant to what the truth is
can't run or hide, baby, it's useless
I know that I've been playing stupid
I gotta save myself
for me and for no one else
before I decay or melt
or wither away in hell
tired of acting like it's fine
wish I could speak my fucking mind
when I'm here, my tongue is tied
when I'm there, I'm free to fly

I need to get away from here 
Ignore all my biggest fears
feel the sounds ring through my ears

cause I know you wonder
where I've been and why I left so long
a place that's stuck in time and clocks are wrong
the sun don't shine and birds don't sing along
upside down and nothing's where it belongs

self destruct or fix me up?
do I tear the seams or stitch em up?
If I cut the thread, I'm close enough to the edge to end what I've begun but I can never do that

self destruct

tell me how it feels to fade away

lyrics:

I don’t really like to say what’s on mind
feel like my hands and tongue are tied when I’m with you
when I’m with you
(x2)


you said “talk to me when you need it”
what’s the point if you don’t mean it?
too many missed calls
give me a reason
you don’t listen when I’m grieving 

I’ve been looking left and right for a reason
get excited when you’re leaving for the weekend
ima make a couple bands off the feeling
I just need a pen and paper, I don’t need them

tell me where you at when I’m hurting?
I can’t say a word without feeling like a burden

(yeah yeah yeah)

always feeling uncertain
gotta cut em off, close the blinds and the curtains

you don’t know what you do to me
fuck round with my head like you can’t believe 
I’m fine, I’ll be better when you fucking leave

(yeah yeah yeah)

I don’t really like to say what’s on mind
feel like my hands and tongue are tied when I’m with you
when I’m with you
(x2)

tongue tied

produced by redmosk

lyrics:

It’s been so long since I woke up not feeling like this
I try my best just to ignore it but I can’t hold it in
I try my best just to be honest, don’t know where to begin
I’d put my pride down for me not to feel this again
(x2)

I’d put my pride down
Set it aside now
And fantasize bout 
how it would be better if I said the way I felt
Instead of something else
I’ll tell you everything until I’m nothing but a shell of myself
Cuz I’m nothing without my thoughts
All the things that cause my brain to rot
I can’t help it
I feel helpless
I hate that I felt this way and there’s me to blame

It’s been so long since I woke up not feeling like this
I try my best just to ignore it but I can’t hold it in
I try my best just to be honest, don’t know where to begin
I’d put my pride down for me not to feel this again
(x2)

pride

my personal favorite off the EP

produced by waves

lyrics:

It’s been running through my head
All the things I could’ve said
If I did, you wouldn’t listen 
So I’ll save it til I’m dead

(til I’m dead- dead-)

Does it even matter anymore?
Stuck with this feeling in my core
Something that I never felt before
won’t let me go

I don’t wanna talk about it
I feel it wrap it’s arms around
Put its hands over my mouth
Feel the need to scream and shout
But when I try it won’t come out

Would anybody hear me?
Would anybody hear me if i tried?
If I’m screaming for my life
When I’m needing for a sign
Can you show me it’s alright?

Can you show me?
(Can you show?)
Can you show me?
(Can you show?)
Can you show me?
(Can you show?)
Can you show me?
(Can you show?)

It’s been running through my head
All the things I could’ve said
If I did, you wouldn’t listen 
So I’ll save it til I’m dead

(til I’m dead- dead-)

Does it even matter anymore?
Stuck with this feeling in my core
Something that I never felt before
Won’t let me go
(x2)

let me go

short outro

lyrics:

Even if it takes a little while
Learned from my mistakes to make you smile
Doing everything to make you proud

I just want to stand right by your side
Watch our hands slowly intertwine 
Let your life turn into mine
Until we’re one and our souls align

even if it takes awhile

produced by grayskies

lyrics:

it takes time to materialize your fantasies
in due time i'll find myself a remedy
or write songs, obsessing bout the melody
i'm headstrong but it's bout time that it gets to me

i shut down and shut my mouth
tryna save some face
a clenched jaw and a sweat drop

bout a second fore i break
if it all falls down
just know i gave it my all
til there was not more i could take
i don't call
and now they're saying that i changed up
it fucks my brain up
(x2)

they don't even try to see where i'm coming from
cuz when i needed it more, i had no one
but i don't even blame em for it
yeah, i would never shame em for it
i'd hate but i can't afford it

i'm way too focused on me
i'm giving into my hopes and greed
but they try to paint like it's much worse than it seems
and they wonder why i'm tearing at the seams
i try to bear it til i

shut down and shut my mouth
tryna save some face
a clenched jaw and a sweat drop

bout a second fore i break
if it all falls down
just know i gave it my all
til there was not more i could take
i don't call
and now they're saying that i changed up
it fucks my brain up
(x2)

break

2 minutes of aafdfvbcncfbreafvdsk

1. wya
2. break
3. alive demo
4. are you doing what you love?
5. listen2myvoice
6. don't worry about me
7. fear demo

don't scare the crows

produced by michael harrison

lyrics:

there’s nobody home tonight 
they won’t hear me if I scream
if I put one in my head
they won’t find me til I reach 
rigor mortis

until my hands are stiff and cold
and the lead’s pierced through my bones
this is everything I’ll leave

I hope that you don’t weep 
good thing I’m a coward
I’ll be here for a while
don’t worry about me

still save a seat for you / don't worry about me

don't worry about me

produced by grayskies

lyrics:

I still save a seat for you
it’s just out of habit
I can’t remembered what happened

it’s like I blinked then you’re gone
it’s not the same place without you
don’t think I forgot you
why does it feel so wrong?
hate to go on but I got to 
My words never got through
and they won’t cuz you’re gone

there’s this void inside my chest
inside my head, I can’t fill it
don’t know the last thing I said,
the last thing we did
why couldn’t I cry that day?
no tears streaming down my face

I wish I could say goodbye- bye- bye 
would I feel the same?
or would I get peace of mind? - mind - mind
wish we could go back frame by frame
take it all away
one more time

but we don’t get what we ask for

why am I breaking down
I’m feeling it now
there’s no use in hiding when no one's around
I’ll figure it out
I won’t make a sound
I’ll keep it to myself like it’s all I’m allowed
I still save a seat for you
Only if I knew 
We’d be stuck like glue
Til the end

it’s like I blinked then you’re gone
it’s not the same place without you
don’t think I forgot you
why does it feel so wrong?
hate to go on but I got to 
My words never got through
and they won’t cuz you’re gone

still save a seat for you

two minutes of meh


1. loose screws 
2. trifecta
3. drunken fist style
4. idk lol but im so real
5. figure you out
6. terrified (scrap)
7. still save a seat for you
8. idk either

still save a seat for you

otuka

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