however some days i think about it too much and just want to disappear

你好！ 我开始学习中文。「nǐ hǎo ！ wǒ kāi shǐ xué xí zhōng wén 」
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she's got that half dead look in her eyes by now

3̸̫̙͖̱͎̆̒̈́̈́̔̂͊̈́͠0̶̢̝̲̠̜̻̖͙̖̏́̓ Ṯ̷̮͓̓͊̕ơ̶͈͔͔̹̰͉̯̏͆̃̎r̸͉̩͉̚̚o̷̙̝̖̼̩͐͊̆̀̀͠n̸̼͇̟͊̅͘t̴̢͖͚̪̗̽̏̽̎̎̕͝ŏ̸͖̫̩̲̅̎̾̐


   
.̸̦͘.̶̡̌1̸̧̛̙͕͇̟̮̟̻̮̻̻͓̙͙̫̞̺̩̞͉͙͈̗͍͚̱̯̟̥̥͈̯͙̯͔̰̗̗͇̯̈͐̎̐͊̀̈́͛̽͒͐̓̿͆̿̅̂́̈́̈́̊̂̓́̽́͌̈̍̌̄̀͑̓͗͒͆̀͘̚̚̕͜͜ͅͅͅ9̸̨̨̢̧̛̛̼͚̭̳̱͓̭̝̝̞̳͎͉̬̹̥̮͇̮̺̼̯̫̩͎͇̩̘͔͇̈́̂̑̃̎͐̄͒̎̓͆͗̅̋̓̈̌̾̆͗̅̋̋̆̇̂̍̈́́̈́̓̐̎̽̔̓̚͘͘͝ͅͅ9̶̭̻̭͙̇̈́̄͋̈́̒̈́ͅ4̵̢̡̢̢̜̭͙̮̯͔͖͈̤̬̞̣̻͖̝̱̪̘̮̩͕̮͓͕̮̘͖͍̹̟͚̻̞̓́͘͠
  ........�̴͇̐̎̍̚
i̴̢͍͈̺̝̦͑t̶̗͂͐͠s̶̱͌̽̓̿͊ ̸͚̰̯͒̉̈́̽s̵̗͍̣͒ǫ̶̠͂͝ ̴̨͕͈͓̣͖͌͜e̴̛̟̭̬͙͉͒͌͛͘͜͜a̵͎͌͐͊̀̈́̒̕s̶̛̖͙̒̆̊͋͊y̴̟̪̓̌͝ ̵̢̧̜̼̠͒͂́͌͛ͅt̴̖͉̦̺̞̼̭̋̇ő̷̡̠͚̞̤̹̹̈́͒̀̆͠ ̷͚͐̌̓̽s̸̬̿̉̒̈́̎̓e̷̪͍̫͌̋͛́͝ę̶͖̯̣̊̃̽̇̽̀ ̷̘̼̻̺̞͘w̶̧̡̬͖̝̹̠͌͆̃͊̽h̷̡̟̽̔͋̑ô̷͇̰͌̅ͅ ̶̙̠̮͈̖̈́́͛̿ͅi̴̟͋͗͠͝͝s̴̢͓̈́̓̆̂͒̏͜͠ ̵̧̨̠̤͚̙̲̈́̓͌̃͆͝͝r̷͚̲̥͔̖̊̒̐͐͊͋ȩ̸̤̬̇̊ą̶̏̐̆̐̈́͠ḽ̴̛͆̔̀̎͋̚

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im like if a girl was {undefined variable}. im like if a girl was [fragment missing]. im like if a girl was (editor's note: the author's invocation of the word "girl" in this context is idiosyncratic, perhaps metaphorical) im like if a girl was im like if a girl draft deleted! im like if a girl You have reached your free article limit! Subscribe now to continue reading. im like if a girl was [THREAD LOCKED] im like if a girl (ENDING EXPLAINED!) im like if a girl Unusual activity detected, please highlight all the pictures of bicycles. im like if a girl I don't respond to prompts that could be deemed offensive, and so I am unable to carry out the request. im-like-if-a-girldeactivated03092023. im like if a girl we are unable to take your call at the minute. im like if a girl isn't registered under that name. im like if a girl could give you her date of birth. im like if a girl oh yes we have you under [...]. im like if a girl LOST CONNECTION

the things you believe are not the same things that are true
we both know it will all soon be over
and the new world will start with you ^_^

Daybreak is catching me now
And you have gone away
I don't want you to go
But can't ask you to stay

I wish I could change your mind
But wishes sometimes die
It is hard for me to smile
When roses bleed to cry

Whenever you think about me, just know I'm thinking of you too, and hoping that you love me even half as much as I love you...

...that would be good enough for me...

You keep your problems so well-hidden
That even your tears feel like smiles
That I will die here is a given
And no one will ever know why

Only once the drugs were done
Did I feel almost human numb
And only once my head was clear
Did I feel safe dying right here

i know you probably dont wanna hear from me, that's fine.
but, i just really need to talk to you, i dont know. 
sorry if that's stupid, i know we havent talked in a while, but i just, i really miss you.
i miss everything about you. i miss talking to you. i miss all the places we went. i miss how you laugh, seeing you smile. i miss watching movies.
i dont know. 
im sorry, i just really miss you, a lot. and i havent been the same without you and.
i just. i hope you'll talk to me, if not then, that's fine. but i miss you here. and i love you, and i miss you and, 
yeah. 
sorry.

however some days i think about it too much and just want to disappear

please be quiet