ANGEL✨P0RT💫

2023 Favorites

Don’t read it because she’s lying (she knows it so she shows it). Don’t think this much at home. If u got platitudes in yo head…..JUST DONT SAY EM.

Feels like a lie like my heart is going to pump out of my chest. A lie about my conventionality to people that don't matter, also a lie about my growth to people that do. A lie about my person to everyone. There is a schism of where I am and where I want to be that can only be achieved by long term investment but I just crave crave crave crave to be instantly gratified. LOL. I should not delete this stupid caption to acknowledge the shame of self-betrayal and the wound it leaves. I write this to depart from the dead skin but not dispose of it. Read and weep at All these dumb platitudes that aren't even funny. Because all these funny insincere words are just me lying to everyone like I used to. To everyone's long-term detriment but to postpone a short-term realization of shame. Because I am literally too guilty all the time to even bear a moderate average amount of shame. I want to be stronger than this but I'm trapped in the cyclical need for strength to handle the shame I feel constantly but lie about to not confront because Ultimately I lack that strength but I need the strength, I need to break the cycle. Sorry for the dumb caption originally. I want to be as funny as I can even when I'm incapable because I don't want to be alone. I need constant validation even though I am self aware of the fact I should try to be strong enough to stand alone with an internal understanding that I am valid. I want this to be temporary, so I am sorry for the time being where I am not where I want to be. I will achieve this growth by the correct and most sustainable means, however long it takes.

FebMar 23

Jazzputin Likes Pt 27

Had this in the vault since fall 2021.. thought i might aswell release it

lil dovas + emotionals3k – PMA

@sorisu

original song : https://soundcloud.com/soristrash/online

cover art by jiiing7

sorisu - online [lb66 dnb flip]

https://open.spotify.com/album/5OKthvnvq6WnY1P2MRXQdj

@benjithemachine

lyrics:

i don't care at all
it's my world
but ur the one who owns me u_u
i'll be ur doll
i'll dress up for u
so plastic pretty ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ
all i want
is for u to care
baby please just hold me
let's just talk
we can play pretend
just say u love me

hmu baby i can be just what u want
plastic love baby break me
call me up when ur feeling horny 0_o
i can be ur fantasy
want to be ur everything

idc at all
i'll b ur doll <3
all i want
let's just talk

Spotify

plastic pretty (benjithemachine)

haloes & hellfire

haloes & hellfire (feat. pradaaslife)

next to me

@y4ndere @h1yori

i rest my head and sleep pretending
that i am fine and that i never let you down
fall in this cycle of unwanted actions
suicidal an unconscious state of mind x2

thinking back
i realize
i was too blind
now my heart is numb
you were never honest
this time i can tell
you always break your promise
wish i could be indifferent
my brain is in dissonance
  
this burden that i carry
wish you could see thru my eyes
you said that i should grow up but
you could never live my life
and i would never trade it 
i know that ill make it thru
the night, ill be fine

ive been self reflective lately
i know i cant fix everything 
but it feels like im running out of air
every time i wake up and youre not there

fine「prod. yandere + hiyori」

new age
prod. tsuyunoshi

im tired of trying to figure me out
it comes around, tired of feelings things are useless for now
pent up aggression, from the lack of self expression
and a speck of love is heaven to me

running in circles to think for urself
and im panicking to keep u compelled
i could waste my time tryna think of lies
actions have their karma, and im digging out my prize

why cant you speak for yourself
you’re always begging for help
ur issues make u fall like a house of cards
i never speak for myself
i’m always begging for help
my issues make me fall like a house of cards

lately it’s so overwhelming
eyes been bleeding, tearing up
feeling held back, my hands been cuffed
in a rut, i’ve just been stuck

ran out of fallbacks and escape plans
my pride slips away from my frail hands

house of cards

I Survived 50 Hours In A Maximum Security Prison

be there

featuring @fearozzles
guitar recorded by abigail franklin of @thelovelyrobot
stems: https://stemmy.versary.town/a/alaskasargent/ayfs/

Hold your hand out
Where did we take the fall
And what did we surround?
Hold your tongue back
From the wolves that close you in
Before you take another chance

You feed like a leech
And grit your teeth
And yet, you smile
And look up to me

Are you forgetting something?
Are you forgetting something?
Are you forgetting something?
Are you forgetting something?
Are you forgetting something?
Are you forgetting something?
Are you forgetting something?
Are you forgetting something?

I don't know what your intentions are anymore
And I don't care
You won't break my trust anymore

I rather distance our space than another sleepless night
And from all the shit you've done to me
Can you get the fuck out my life
It was unforgivable
Self destructible
So predictable
I'm fed up
All I endured
Unavoidable
Always miserable
But

You feed like a leech
And grit your teeth
And yet, you smile
And look up to me

Are you forgetting something?
Are you forgetting something?
Are you forgetting something?
Are you forgetting something?
Are you forgetting something?
Are you forgetting something?
Are you forgetting something?
Are you forgetting something?

Are You Forgetting Something?

AYFS?

Are You Forgetting Something? (feat. fearozzles)

betrayed 「prod. yandere」

it got so hard 2 breathe when i gave them security
i tried to think that they weren't just abusing me
this year i learned to never trust a soul besides myself
my friends tore me apart and left me as a fucking shell

no more hiding
times raced by me
i can't fight the 
walls are closing in

8 months no luck
i know we're fucked
no help i'm stuck
i wish i always knew they sucked

they crushed me i'll admit it
can't take on the weight i'm finished
it was never meant to be like this
i'll dive head first to the abyss

I'M LOST
DEEP IN THE GROUND
6 FEET
CAN'T HEAR A SOUND
SO LONG
FOREVER BOUND
IT'S OVER I'LL NEVER BE FOUND

you act like it's never your fault
you walked away and watched me crawl

no more hiding
times raced by me
i can't fight the 
walls are closing in

I'M LOST
DEEP IN THE GROUND
6 FEET
CAN'T HEAR A SOUND
SO LONG
FOREVER BOUND
IT'S OVER I'LL NEVER BE FOUND

CRAWLLLLLLL
I'LL NEVER BE FOUND

I'LL NEVER BE FOUND

{spotify - https://open.spotify.com/album/59uvuWhy3TZe5SPlWwkyBv}

[一] halcyon
[二] interlude1 (spedup)
[三] refraction
[四] interlude2
[五] life @kyitsuu
thank u to everyone that listens to my music it truly means more than i can ever express in words <3
shoutout to all my day ones shoutout gg & sr
ep will be up on spotify in a few days after i post this
hq download will be up on bandcamp

lets search for a moment...

tether

capoxxo + asa41 - tether (prod @b07gem)

prod: yandere
vocals: kerosene + crescent
lyrics written by: yandere + crescent

Stream us on Spotify! https://open.spotify.com/artist/5EyYculuuhEIKCu9IClSV7

17

inno