Northage is one human, mostly me, but can sometimes be two or even three combined individuals, double or triple-headed with a compound eye and arms beyond count.

Musically I'll gush out any old blurt and blather and occasionally twang along on the ukulele. Melody's probably my strong suit but I'm better lyrically. I've managed several times to play guitar and may once, even twice, have tickled the plastics of a cheap Tandy keyboard left over from the '90s. Despite my favourite part of the day being the evening I don't restrict my musical activities to any particular time.

My debut album, recorded back in the '80s when I was twelve, was made by playing a 33rpm LP (Themes For Super Heroes by Geoff Love & His Orchestra - connoisseurs will know it) at 45rpm and 'singing', or at least shouting and wailing discordantly, over the top of it. It was indescribably terrible and a deaf gibbon with impaired motor functions couldn't have failed to come a long way since (I know from experience). I like rehashing songs in C, F, G, Am and Em because if it ain't broke that's handy as I'm not very good at fixing things.

Bye then.

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