The Pussy Rubber (Club Edit)

The Pussy Rubber (Club Edit) 🔞

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lyrics written and performed by Joshua "Banjoe" Paterson 

production, mixing and mastering done by Leonard "OMPT" Johnson 

Who Knows?

🎵 Track 14: Uneasy
(Ballad / The Crystallization of Youth and First Love)

“Uneasy” is the closing track of the album and holds a special place in BLUE TARO-P’s heart as the first full-fledged ballad ever composed. Lyrics, composition, and arrangement were all done solely by the artist. It’s a deeply personal piece, reflecting on the bittersweet memory of a first love lost.Guitar playing by is OZ.

Originally composed in A minor, it was later transposed to the more complex A♭ minor because the vocal range felt too high. Written during student days, the song represents an emotional and musical outpouring—truly a “crystallization of youth.”

The piece uses many seventh chords to deepen its emotion, and it was also the artist’s first serious attempt at composing long, irregular verse melodies. The process involved repeated trial and error, and the moment a true “ballad structure” emerged was unforgettable.

Around this time, BLUE TARO-P began to feel that melodies were not being "created" so much as "received."

“It was like I was just typing out melodies I heard from somewhere beyond.”
A music professional later told the artist, “That’s what we call ‘a melody descending from above,’” and that insight left a lasting impression.

This track also features the artist’s first modulations in a B-section, with the goal of creating “natural transitions.” Though still a beginner at the time, BLUE TARO-P experimented with techniques learned from theory books and advice from a respected mentor, including the suggestion:

“If IIm7-5 feels too dark in a minor key, try using IIM instead.”

From that experimentation, the artist also learned how to return to the original key after modulating down a half-step—proving the value of asking questions and taking bold steps.

The lyrics reflect a real-life heartbreak, and writing them brought the artist to tears. But through the completion of the song, that first love could finally be put to rest as a treasured memory.

“Uneasy” is a song where I truly faced myself through music—
and it holds profound meaning in my life.

Lyrics : BLUE TARO-P
Music : BLUE TARO-P
Guitar : Guitarist OZ
Arrangement : BLUE TARO-P


Uneasy (English trancelation)

The feeling of not being able to understand each other is the end result of a love that goes by in vain
The happiness of spending time with loved ones, the faint burning candle, doesn't last long

No 
It seems like my love won't reach you tomorrow either

Ah
The hot tears held back deep in my eyes are about to overflow with anxiety
Ah
I think this love will probably never come true, but time just passes by


Our inability to understand each other increases the number of sleepless nights
Believing that your feelings would surely turn towards me, I continued aimlessly searching for a miracle

No
I can't give up on my love for you, who shines like the sun

Ah
A passionate feeling wells up from deep within my heart, making me anxious and almost breaking
Ah
I tried to hold your arms tightly
I think this love will probably never come true, but time just passes by


Ah
If you and I could embrace each other tenderly and tightly, I think the anxiety in my heart would disappear.
Ah
There were nights when my arms were hot, but I couldn't put an end to this love

わかりあえない気持ちは
すれ違う恋の成れの果て
ふたりで過ごす幸せ
たよりない灯かりは長くはもたないね

No　明日も君は
手が届きそうにないから

Ah　目の奥熱くこらえた涙が
不安であふれそうになるよ
Ah　その腕強く抱きしめたくても
この恋かないそうになくて
ただ時間は過ぎてく

わかりあえない気持ちは
眠れない夜を増やすけど
きっと変わると信じて
あてもなく奇跡を探し続けてた

No　まぶしい君は
想い出になんかできない

Ah　激しく熱くこみ上げる想い
不安で壊れそうになるよ
Ah　その腕強く抱きしめてみたけど
この恋かないそうになくて
ただ時間は過ぎてく

Ah　優しく強く抱きしめあえたら
不安も消えるはずなのに
Ah　この腕熱い夜もあったけれど
この恋さよならすること
僕にはできなくて

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