prod. Jojo Centineo
vocal mix / art by me

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Sfzkyea34w

i look & don't recognize what i see around me
& everything was a lie that you'd ever tell me
i kept it bottled inside but it isn't healthy
shouldn't have let it all out but i couldn't help it
i hold my head to the sky
(when it start to drown me)
left me alone here to die
(had to find myself then)
devil wearing a disguise
(said that you would help me)
praying to god that he keep me alive

calling all my plans off
watching the world fall apart between my fingers
i keep my hands closed
right where we left off
pick up the story i would but all the ink inside of my pen's gone 
i'm going places i never thought i would've before
i tried replacing you couldn't bear the weight of my loss
send me an angel to come & take my spirit above 
don't be afraid of the ghost that i think i might become

i think i'm running out of luck
watching my whole entire world fall down

Angel (prod. JOJO)

this is the first beat I bought and the first song I made with jolst :)

lyrics 

painful like a blister
optimism is a sickness
call a liar as ur witness
just to cover up ur tracks
contemplating on my wisdom
do u take the chance n miss em
do u turn around n kiss him
just to validate ur act
but u don't stick to ur bones
there's time to change ur mind n call ur parents n go home
christ, God, put down the phone
binary solarity too hard for u to cope

oh, I'm nothing but a stoner
I'm a deadweight better as a loner
u can cry girl I can be ur shoulder 
I'm alone and I'm only getting colder

my brain has faulty wiring
tryna get undone
the doctors call it bpd
I'm messed up as they come
cause every minor set back 
leaves the feeling of a gun
pressed to my head n then I panic
cause the the chamber to be spun
hey aren't u shamed?
aren't u so n sos ex?
idk maybe I'm just tryna forget
I find it kinda funny that I'm known for my regrets
but the people that uv loved will always try to get revenge
the pain is in my brain n I swear it's gonna last
I'm still got up on the shit that happened to me in my past
disregarding all my feelings cause the time is moving fast
and my friends are placing bets on how long they think ima last
oh I bet that I'll see u in the nighttime 
bad dreams, cracked seams with the red eyes 
my bloods worth less than ur damn time
I'm a corpse tryna fight off these damn flies
oh I already told ya
I won't be sober till some point after October
time flies everyday we gettin older
we grindin hard, we just tryna find some closure

binary solarity (Jolst)

im just tryna make a fuckin living off this shit
im just tryna get away from this town for a bit
good morning :)
wake up!
time to b pretty, put on ur fuckin makeup
good morning :)
good morning :)
good morning :)
good morning :)
this corsets restricting my breathing jus like my life is
you just try to cheer me up by asking me to join a call,
i join the call
then i get ig fucking nored
thats okay!
after all youll never really know when im boutta fall xp
right now.
im just tryna keep myself from picking the fuckin blade up
cause i just wanna talk 
but ion got much to say
ion got much (left) to bring to the motherfuckin plate

good morning :)

good morning, wake up. (2001 x dead spyro)

EPITOME:

i-i-i-i-i try to forget the past 
but it just keep bringing me back
n-n-n-no we didn’t  know how this would last
is it funny to you to see my life shatter like glass
t-t-t-the world around me left me broken and scarred
don’t be surprised when i’m dead in the dark
these lonely feelings that i can’t shake

oh god
when will i break

(epitome & casperrr)

all of these feelings 
what is the meaning
i struggle every day to keep on living and breathing 
at this point i’ll be dead hanging from the ceiling 

i’ve been so alone
got no where to go
not even a home
walking down this lonely road
no hands to hold
i’m really on my own
it haunts me to know 
that i can’t let 

c-c-cant let
GO
of the past

it haunts me to know 
it haunts me to know

CASPERRR:

u keep haunting me in my sleep
n u keep haunting in my dream
i thought u were mine to keep 
but nothings really what it seems 
everything is black and white 
so much shit that i can fix
the only coloured thing is lean

dirty sprite makes me feel fine
all this buzz man am so high
did i lose weight i feel light
do you still remember thst night

it haunts me to know w/ casperrr (cl6udy x yunny goldz)

NEVERBEENBETTER

10 seconds and im in
based
flipped visions got erased
faced
with the painful truth 
that i dont give a fuck
i dont know what works
but i know 
i was the first
and ill always be the worst
x2

in a different state 
fuckin blacked out
they dont know my name
huh, its how it stays now
yeh
id really
like it
if you kept my name in ur mouth
cus i wanna be talked about
fuck it if i roundabout
spent my life being kicked around
a to the m to the gay 
to the "what the fucks this kid sayin?"
i
dont
get around
i just wanna be grounded

10 seconds and im in
based
flipped visions got erased
faced
with the painful truth 
that i dont give a fuck
i dont know what works
but i know 
i was the first
and ill always be the-

worst.
but anyway,
im scared
that im not gonna make it farther than i am
right now
and i struggle more than i ever have
but now its different shit
and i guess i gotta write about it 
why u stayin in this life if u not really all about it?
im just an angsty teen with the same shit 
that you deal with,
so whats special bout it?
fucking nothing.
i dont deserve any of this shit,
so gimme nothing.
but they'll always be a side of me that wants somethin,
live a life,
maybe fuckin god damn be somethin.

0 seconds and im in
based
flipped visions got erased
faced
with the painful truth 
that i dont give a fuck
i dont know what works
but i know 
i was the first
and ill always be the worst
x2

what works? (valious & maxflynn)

lyrics
-------------------------
yeah i think that its time to break up
i can see that ur mad as fuck, 
but i’ve had enough of ur toxic love
got me so fucked up & i’m jaded

can we start over? can we run it back?
hell nah no way, that shits dead
& you said that i’m breaking my promise
maybe that’s true but im just being honest

gas me up then
tear me down
im not the same
i killed myself
old me’s dead & he’s 6ft under
everybody better run for cover

always in the backround
still all black now
gettin too faded that i always black out
had me in a chokehold, so i hadda tap out
my word don’t mean shit when i always back out

sometimes i feel like i’m stuck in time
guess im the one that got left behind
tryna pick up the pieces again
but maybe i could just use a friend

yeah i think that its time to break up
i can see that ur mad as fuck, 
but i’ve had enough of ur toxic love
got me so fucked up & i’m jaded

can we start over? can we run it back?
hell nah no way, that shits dead
& you said that i’m breaking my promise
maybe that’s true but im just being honest

gas me up then
tear me down
im not the same
i killed myself
old me’s dead & he’s 6ft under
everybody better run for cover

a void inside that i cant fill
it makes me feel so empty
the voice inside says one more pill
don’t tempt me

-

can we start over? can we run it back?
hell nah no way, that shits dead
& you said that i’m breaking my promise
maybe that’s true but im just being honest

gas me up then
tear me down
im not the same
i killed myself
old me’s dead & he’s 6ft under
everybody better run for cover

break up! [prod. SyphonBeatz x Perish]

lyrics:

Watch me gleam through the screen, that UAV
Diamonds dancin ya it's getting hard to see
I dim the lights so i could get it right
Well i don't think im coming back tonight
"Put the narcotics down" ya
It was never the problem a-ah
It's over the counter
It's under the table 
I'll come with the action a-ah
A hundred degree's inside 
But we're still freezing
What a sequence
Ay i want you here to see it's real
to you too
A piece of me flying through the wind from the sunroof
Even up the score it's getting hard to redo
Do u see me here
Breathe me in

I told lil bitch he don't mean shit
I'ma take your life on me so slick
And i can tell that you can't see straight
I keep that stick on me like Reway

Fortify the minds of every life
They keep the secrets deep inside
(Oh, god)
As if they even need to tell a lie
We see the truth inside your eyes
(Oh, why)
Wait, sleep under your silence
And please, reach into your heart a lost cause is all I'm ever gonna be

Fuck this 
I'm alright with 
Eternal silence

Watch me gleam through the screen, that UAV
Diamonds dancin ya it's getting hard to see
I dim the lights so i could get it right
Well i don't think im coming back tonight
"Put the narcotics down" ya
It was never the problem a-ah
It's over the counter
It's under the table 
I'll come with the action a-ah
A hundred degree's inside 
But we're still freezing
What a sequence
Ay i want you here to see it's real
to you too
A piece of me flying through the wind from the sunroof
Even up the score it's getting hard to redo
Do u see me here
Breathe me in

NEVERBEENBETTER

Scaredycat 303

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