I know people are all about hey don't just run around showing unfinished work to people. I get that I get that, but I just want to show a few people where I'm at with this song. And soundcloud is a really convenient way to share it with people. And if some people come to mind, why not have everyone have the ability to hear it. There is still work to be done. Most songs on here are very different as works in progress than when the demo was posted, but there is something very solid about soundcloud posting and I don't mean for that. I'm very tired typing this. It is thanksgiving. I am going to try to make some food.

Anyway this song is built around a sample of Perfect Day by Lou Reed. I love that song. I used a Yamaha PSS 140, very proud of that for others parts and my voice too. I rapped over it, I;ll post that, not sure how into it I am.

Here are some words I wrote before I even worked on the song for a 6 hour period of time today. When i felt really inspired. It is imenseley rambly and definitely incoherent. there are a lot of aprts i was going to flesh out but haven't yet. I will make a nut loaf for thanksgiving, which is vegetarian but i'm totally gonna eat turkey too.

Anyway a big part of this long block of text is a reflection on Galatians 6. The very popular verse you reap what you sow, I sort of relate this to the metaphor Thich Nhat Hanh uses of watering seeds of goodness, because that is a really popular and fleshed out way of describing the world. Then I relate how maybe just maybe if we think about the Spirit, Pneuma as being eternal and accessible in the breath. Yea good night 5:15 AM nov 28 2013

Here commences that thing

Perfect Day
Perfect Moment

I am releasing a track that samples the song Perfect Day.
On this day we remember a musician and a person who I respect a lot, Lou reed, who died just about a month ago, from this the eve of Thanksgiving 2013. And On this day when I like to express thankfulness I am thankful at least for the words I've read, maybe centering on Wikipedia, and other words centering around the impression of a person who has existed, who developed from the matter that has made all of us, and developed a cognizant ability that we all share. And me, and my person, my concept of Scott, though looking closely there is no solidity to the concept, for me to be and to use words as the I moves on its way to total unity has been so inspired by Lou's life and his work. I've been tantalized by cool, the way to be, and to feel exhilarated by good music. 

Some days might seem perfect, like everything is in its right place. I know that Mr Lou Reed received wisdom from Taoist traditions. I call this song Perfect Moment, in a reflection of the perfection of the universe. For every person in the world there are dozens stars in this galaxy. There are probably that many galaxies in the universe. On any distant planets we see that the universe exists and is being there. Planets revolve around their suns. Canyons, mountains, atmospheres, and the space in between them. There they exist beyond our earth, beyond our suffering, made out of the same matter that we are made out of, that we use to feel and touch and listen. And time, our concepts of it, and our concepts of space, are for us to be used with each other, but not tied to something beyond our general agreement right now. There exists lands never touched by our ideas of time or space, and also beyond our perceptions of this is what a perfect day is like, or this day isn't the good one, it isn't the one I wanted.

At the end of the Hsin Hsin Ming, a piece of Buddhist Taoist thing Words! The Way is beyond language,
for in it there is
no yesterday
no tomorrow
no today.
So this perceptible moment, not one of a day, but an eternal now.

There are lyrics to this song. Is that what the song is about? Words help to shape our opinion, but words are just one element of sound. Different musical textures, and delivery happens. But I will discuss the lyrics. I identify with the ambiguity of the You who the day is being spent with. Sometimes when we reflect in trying times of days when we had a special time when everything was great and good golly was that the perfection? Is the You is it G-d? Is it the Breath? Is it heroin? A lover? 
You are going to reap just what you sow this line is reminiscent of Galatians 6. I am called upon the parallels between Galatians 6 and the message of Buddhist Monk Thich Nhat Hanh. 

7 Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. 8 Whoever sows to please their flesh, from the flesh will reap destruction; whoever sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. 9 Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. 10 Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers. 

Here are some modern extrapolations I want to add to this. Thich Nhat Hanh uses the symbolism of gardening, to water and to tend to seeds of kindness in other people and people all around.  

I think that we can all read the words St Paul wrote and have a reasonable interpretation of what was meant. I like to latch on the idea that the common translations I encounter are accurate. But as me and Paul are brothers in Christ, I'd like to talk a little about what resonates with me in his words, in a way I'd like to believe I could if I could respond to Paul in friendly conversation. This is especially exemplified by Paul's declaration in Galatians 6:11 “See what large letters I make when I write with my own hand.” This, to me is one of my favorite lines of all of Paul. It is as if to say, or to indicate to me that he is writing a letter, authoritatively, and with much influence, but also as someone who could be corresponded with.

Whoever sows to the flesh (sarka) from the flesh will reap decay (phthoran) φθοράν but who ever sows for the spirit (pneuma) we have zoen aionion life without a time. 
Let us do good for all people, and for ourselves. Let's water our own seeds of kindness and compaasion and seeds of loving kindness and compassion in others. You might reap corn or cotton, or big bonus checks, but these things all fade. Our bodies fade and our flesh will decay. But it is Paul's notion that in working for the Spirit and for Christ we go to life that is eternal.

This is one thing I'd say to Paul if I could write to him, I'd say oh yea it's funny when you write that 

I'm not writing to Paul, I'm writing to you, and we are all friends with Paul.


I can say this much about Queer Politics. We might see many natural places where we can get together with many political communities, communitite who have been destroyed by all the forces of this earth. Yet politics, so often develops into the action the planning, the positioning and posturing to stay into power. And so what I want to express solidarity with is the whole entire world and all of being. 

There are many people who struggle with identities that they might blossom into. If being gay in the Massachusetts in the 2000s has taught me anything it is the importance of compassion of loving and understanding. There are many groups who will never be a majority and who will struggle every day. For me, my experience is one of wrestling with Love and the many ways Love manifests itself. 

So many people died from AIDS, so many people died and I hope there was solace. There was a time before I was born, there was  time when many people had died and there was this chaos and suffering and calamity. And I wasn't born yet. There was a time before I was born, and I didn't know that my community would suffer through it.





Just as I finished writing this collection of thoughts on Lou Reed, Galatians 6, Buddhism, and AIDS, I just randomly opened the Bible nearest to me. And I swear I was going to work on my track. And the reason I was thinking about AIDS was because the title of Elton John's new book caught my eye. And I thought about this song perfect day as being by a member of a community of people who were not straight, the doubly marginalized. And I cried as I thought about these things. And this line thi verse made me reflect a lot on my queer identity, my yearning to understand G-d more, and this beauty. And So I turned my internet off to read it in the closest text Bible to me and I found this page in a Bible my grandparents gave me on my confirmation in November 2002. It is published by Zonervan and it iscalled teen study bible.  There is a passage insert of theoretical advice to a potential writer. 

It says this, “Dear Alex, 
For Many people AIDS is a natural consequence of their sinful behavior. Scripture speaks clearly about the hoosexual lifestyle. Though many wil tell you that homosexuality is a normal alternative lifestyle, G-d tells you it's a perversion. What people sow they will reap (Galatians 6:7-8)”

I have three responses. One to my self one to the readers one for the author and one for G-d.

The copyright on edition of this Bible is 1993. I was only three years old then. For me the old old timeless story is so linked with the beginning of my cognition. I remember Church was the first place I really went to routinely that wasn't my house. It is these images and these ideas that I use and reflect on the story so much. These images. There is a lot we don't know. I didn't know. But when I was three I couldn't write this.

Here is my story. It is the day before thanksgiving 2013. I was wanting to look up Alcatraz and the Indian takeover in 1969 and work on mastering some music I was working on. I read an article about more gay men having unprotected sex, and I suddenly had an urge to look up Elton John's newish book Love is the Cure. I was touched by his words about Ryan White, and I reflected on the stigma surrounding AIDS, and what gay people have experienced in the history of there being a people. As I read his story I began to reflect on a beautiful song called “Perfect Day” by Lou Reed, a song I have sampled and am working on. This in turn reminded me of the passage from Galatians you're gonna reap what you so.” So I was reflecting on many things. I was reflecting on the beauty of this song. I reflected on what many people who had HIV struggled with through the 1980s. I thought about my friends, many who are queer and how I shared many spaces with ghosts who are not with me, those who have died from AIDS. I remember walking down Christopher Street in Manhattan and you reflect on all the death and dying and the end of a community and certainly one would think this is the end. 

So I cried and I mourned fall all those we have lost around the world from HIV AIDS. And I reflected on Galatians and wrote a little bit about it. It is my interpretation of how we reap what we sow. And what we reap is goodness if we sow goodness. That our flesh our physical body, may be sown into many seeds but these all fade and decay. It is the seed of the spirit, Pneuma that bring life eternal without age to all of us. No thing done for this body for this flesh will not decay, it is our deeds of goodness that bring us to the eternal.

I will not posture that I am a Biblical Scholar. I am a very liberal interpreter of Scripture, in opposed to a literal one. But I'm sure you'd agree with me we have the opportunity to do good, we ought to do good to all people. There are questions about what these good works are. Maybe we can reflect in the scripture as to what deeds there are. And so I find that I am called to say that the ways that gays have been treated and people with AIDS have be treated is not something I find to be good. It does not seem to me like a seed to sow into the Spirit. 
Yet there are many parts of scripture that are really not into homosexuality it would appear. We might disagree and I certainly see that, but we are united in Christ as believers I do not seem to think there is any reason for there to be anything about that. 

Here are some questions I have about the letter I want to raise. The second paragraph in the letter is one that is equates risky behavior with natural consequences for actions, but this is in conjunction with ideas of people getting AIDS as it is a perversion. I would say there are many risky behviors we may engage in where our physical bodies suffer quite a bit, but that does not mean there is anything negative about that. To spread Jesus can lead to being killed or imprisoned or tortured, yet that is one of the most one cn do to sow seeds pleasing the Spirit. We can drive in cars, that doesn't mean it is bad that car accidents happen. When men who have sex with men use condoms it greatly reduces the risk of the transmission of HIV, but that does not change the moral atmosphere around it. Riskiness and Godliness are not necessarily interrelated. In the time of Jesus many lepers were thought to be stricken with sin, and perhaps it is true that many were sinners. However, Christ compels me to act to stand with those who are broken down by the evils of the world. With all who are broken down. Good seeds can be sown at any point by any person. 


They didn't know.
I was already thinking this before I picked up this Bible. But I just want to say that for every person who has had someone influenced by Christianity tell them that homosexuality is not normal, I just want to say that they did not understand. People looked at the world and tried to understand what was happening and what was normal, what was the way to follow. But they don't really understand what it is like for you.

Reap What You Sow (Perfect Moment) [demo] {instrumental}

If you sincerely try your best you might be able to rest easily knowing that for everything you are you did an amazing job, even if it might seem like that to anyone else. The only person anything every seems like to anyone is the one who does the seeming. 

You are special not for doing anything, but you are unique in who you are. Learning to love myself has been learning to let go of all the things I've done that I tried to prove to myself and others that I was a "good" person. I am who I am. And my love for my self or for anyone does not have to be contingent on what they offer or who is done.

I want to collaborate with people who are thinking but too afraid to even try. I don't want to necessarily have a proof of concept or a hope. I want to work with people who might not be where they idealize themselves to be, because I have been there and I still strive to something as an artist and a lot can happen, especially when I didn't have any hands offered to me, and I might not have known to ask.

So many get discouraged because they don't know how to ask for help. And I am slowly learning to ask for help, and to say this is who I am this is what I do. And to have a confidence that I am prepared as I am, I have what I have, and we can work together. Because so much talent and drive is lost when people struggle not really know how to advocate for themselves, and I think we are all on that spectrum, I know that I am. And so, I think I want to ask and stuff.


Reap What You Sow (Perfect Moment) [demo] {instrumental}

scott-oglesby