Lewis And Clark VS Calvin And Hobbes

Intercities
-Meaningful Song #1-
A song about the trials of growing up, and as you grow up, you change, but are always loved. Also displays the worrylessness of childhood.


i’m not living in an intercity
but i wish that I could bring it with me
take a way the litter and the little kiddies
and you got yourself a more enjoyable new york or philly

a photo framed in the middle of the living room
belittled by its natural existent different view
I wish I could do - something to fix you
but you’re beautiful inside, and I know it’s true

I been blue, since up, I grew
out in the sewers there’s a hundred thousand pettigrews
but I could never wish for a better view
I put my trust in all these streets to direct me to you
 
its set in stone, but it starts with bricks
just remember that in every single dark abyss
is a street light, and if my feet could type
they would tell you forever ‘cause they never forget the
street life

-chorus-

Day by day, the trees are going down
and all i can do is keep my feet on the ground
and hope I don’t get knocked down with em
but for now, I’ll just hide inside my grandma’s kitchen

and when you’re living like a kid, living’s all there is
singing, and swinging never even thinking to call it quits
crawling to talking to walking all of a sudden we’re all like this
wishing we could live without this lack of lavish lawlessness

Sprawled in offices is where we’re doomed to be
but that fate’s not true to me
I’m due to be dubiously doing what i do best, lucratively
it’s not what you could have been but where your dreams at,
Aladdin’t do was never live life like a street rat


how can you beat that?
born and raised by where each one of my feet are at
went from a point guard, to a score adjuster
a shot in the dark, found more than just a 

-redundant chorus-


Intercities

Still Make Guitars Cry
-Lyrical Showcase #2-
A song explaining how I know I suck, but somehow, someway, I still find a way to create a beautiful song.

This one goes out to any man who doesn’t care
You’ll wanna care when you’re running scared
I could summon such cumbersome stuff to wear
and still find time to outrun the hare


Life’s a carnival game, it’s fun to fare
then you wonder where your money went, it wasn’t fair
and when I spike that high striker, you’ll wanna stare
cause I swear i won the world’s largest gummy bear


i’ll tug you from your knuckle hair 
I’m the reason boxers have to fight in underwear
i’ll uppercut a sucker if he doesn’t wear ‘em
 or if he tries to cross me i’ll just punnet square ‘em

this ain’t your last supper, share,
i’ll spare you if you pass me the tupperware
toss me a couple pears,
underneath your puddle of saliva, yeah they’re under there
and if you were unaware


I aint a tall guy but i ain’t a small fry 
about a minute and a half has gone bye
trust me I’m a waste of OUR time
but I can still make guitars cry


Don’t think Ubisoft, I can hear your Far Cry
screaming more than 90 seconds now has gone by
why try? I’m a waste of our time
but I can still make guitars cry


Drip drip that’s the tears of a sitar
but I’m still living life off a clif bar
and it’s hard, over 8 pounds, to lift bars
but I drop ‘em wit no problem like I’m Pixar
4 Toy Stories, 2 Braves, 6 cars
You’re a coy! boring, too lame for this star
split you into 8 bits like pixel art
I hit tar-gets, you’re more kwik-mart

get smart or stay dumb, it is the code
i’ll school you like the magic bus on frizzle’s show
no excuses mr. bueler, if you didn’t know
you missed the show now sit and mope in the bitter cold

hi and welcome to the 4yo kitchen show
we’ll need corn flour, either way you’re picking rose
throw these beets on a skillet, yeah, I sizzle those,
roasting every vegetable in hard core chisel mode


and matteo’s rosting potatoes of all kinds
who think that he’s a neither fly or tall guy
i’ll try to get it through your mind that I’m nothing but a waste of our time
who can make a guitar cry

i’m a put and put it underneath the par guy
about 2 minutes and a half have gone by
birdie, or an eagle, either of ‘em are fly
so I’ll take my time while I make guitars cry

-Guitar Solo by Sal Adonis-

Still Make Guitars Cry

First to Advance
@lazysundaypaper
-Meaningful Song #2-
A song about how I used to always get kicked down as a kid, but now you can see me being the first to advance to bigger and better things. The ending is reminiscent of Hunter, "Lazy Sunday Paper", guiding me through life as I slowly grow older with every other line."

I'll be the first to advance
like a gameboy from 2006
that fit in to the fingers of a little kid that wished that he could be a bigger kid in the immense world we live in
now he's singing and he doesn't need to wish on stars no more
he's been to hell and back and got exactly what he wished for
itll take a little time and a little bit of pride to crush your dark side  
you'll be riding on the sky when you find that princess leia
no more riding solo, you'll be onomatopeing it 
got people saying wow, he's a howdy how'd he get her?
When all I did was hope that all this weather would get better
So, instead of in regret i'm getting better, 
I'm getting ahead I bet
I'll be the first to step to enter this duettal adventure
I'll get that special sunset run this back on every cassette
better yet, I cast a silhouette on fellas telling me i couldn’t make it so they stand in the shadow of that
I'm a veteran at marionetting and making a mess outta every one of my enemies
and no one who offends me, doesnt understand me, repremands me aint a friend to me
In the end itll be me and
 you and no one else will matter
Leaving every other rapper mad, hatter
I'm stepping up to the plate and up to batter and 
to face the face of the race
don't make me a snake if i take first place
but i'm sitherin in to the winning position 
restricting the limits from this prohibition
a proefficient coefficient, 
never missing a chance to be different
so listen, i'm really reeling them in and i aint goin' fishing

look for me ill find you
ill be right behind you
to catch you when you fall and then stand beside you
forever i abide to

you, make me believe it now

HUNTER: (1:34)
Whoa I can see it now
every little confession that made me bleed
every little truth made me see, you!
i can’t afford to lose such a wondrous tune
when push comes to shove I tend to fall
bounded up till I am black and blue
ooh I see it dude the man in the mirror is a different you
I question my role in these shoes I question this battle if I should move
Im stuck in these ruins, I feel ancient compared to these dunes 
Life aint easy when we drift away, I want to stay
burnt by these rays leaving scars on my face
i want to pray but it seems god made me this way

MATTEO: (2:04)
I am who i am and you made me that
HUNTER: (2:09)
I am who I am i created that
MATTEO:
Our problems are crafted and conquered by us
HUNTER:
It’s an inward battle constructed by trust
MATTEO:
And you must come up from the shackles of dust
HUNTER:
Kick ‘em in the nuts and scream that’s enough
MATTEO:
You wanna stand up tall not crash and fall
HUNTER:
If you aint first to do it, why advance at all?

MATTEO: (2:19)
It’s a trance and all, or so you think
What if you could fix it all with a blink
You can’t do that if your eyes are closed
You gotta defend or get overthrown

HUNTER: (2:26)
But no matter how hard you fight, you’re always on the run
Selfless and hopeless waiting to become the one
I know I’ve been there gasping for air in this puddle
but know people are there to get you out of this struggle


MATTEO: (2;33)
You aren’t the only soldier in war
You’ve got a friend for what life’s in store for
of course you’re overboard with the soreness
the only hands holding you down are yours, kid

HUNTER: (2:40)
I broke free from these chains
I felt foreclosed in a world of pain
They tried and break me for what I was
But I persevered and told them enough IS ENOUGH


MATTEO: (2:47)
With my advanced in hand I just can’t seem to find a friend
HUNTER:
You’re not alone my friend, we’ll endure this, grab my hand
MATTEO:
What if I can’t fend against the pressures that will take a stand 
HUNTER:
We gotta take a leap of faith, all odds on one chance
MATTEO:
And together no one’s powerful enough to say we can't
HUNTER:
And we will each no longer be the victims of a circumstance
MATTEO:
Since you have reversed it I can see the curse at a glance
MATTEO AND HUNTER: (2:59)
to see that we surpassed from last and now we are the first to advance

-outro-

First To Advance (feat. LazySundayPaper)

There was going to be artwork, but Photoshop decided to crash, so artwork coming soon I suppose. Enjoy the battle! :)

Epic Rap Battles of Pokemon #14
Snorlax vs Slaking
Begin!

Slaking :
Straight out of Petalburg to show you what you're Snorlacking
My high attack stat is barely Normal, prepare for some attacking
you've just got Thick Fat, a Hammer Arm is what I've packing
Quit snacking, the whacking cracking swagger is Slaking!
You make me yawn, what's going on? One hit and you'll be gone!
Climbing up higher with my brawn, call me King Kong!
You've sure got gluttony, but no immunity in this rap battle
Defense Curl up, since you're too sleepy to even use tackle!

Snorlax : 
You dare to wake me up? Like paths your disses I block
I crunch and munch this sloth who's just Slacking Off!
You might have good stats, but your potential is ruined
Cause every other turn, you just sit on your ass and Truant
Eating fruit, then beating you, I'm the best you've ever seen
Feel the rhythm of my Belly Drum as I Chip you Away with rhyme schemes
You're making my hyper, like a beam! I'm on Ash's damn team!
Now it's time to take a nap, you go rap while I dream

Slaking :
YOU'RE OBESE, SO PLEASE, you will never get this win!
I compare with a legendary, I got more skill than you got chins
As you eat up my disses, you ain't getting more slim
You're out of shape, but you can still find me in the Gym!
Right beside Norman, my power is at Max, I'm getting hostile
Coveting the mic, now May I show you ass-whooping Petalburg Style?
I'll leave you consuming Leftovers, go back to blocking routes
This was your Punishment, you can suck my Pokéflute!

Snorlax :
I could talk in my sleep and still be standing tall
I'm also in SSB. Brawl, time to put you to Rest once and for all
Evolving through friendship, I am what every trainer wishes for
You're such a bore, I've got more in store when I use Snore
A challenge? Rollout out of town! You're just loafing around!
I've got such a Heavy Slam since I weigh over a thousand pounds!
My lyrical Giga Impacts sure showed you you shouldn't face me
This languorous languid laggard is only good at being lazy!

Snorlax vs Slaking. Epic Rap Battles of Pokemon #14.

Here's the audio preview for the upcoming ACRB special royale! ;)

AccordionChick Rap Battles - Wii Fit Trainer VS Villager Audio Preview

SEASON 4 IS HERE!

We are starting off this season with a bang, The Blues Brothers vs Drake & Josh featuring special guest rapper Richalvarez!

VideoGameRapBattles as Drake Bell
Game Mechanics (Logan)as Josh Peck
Richalvarez (Richard and Chris) as The Blues Brothers

Lyrics:
EPIC RAP BATTLE PARODIES
DRAKE AND JOSH
VERSUS
THE BLUES BROTHERS
BEGIN

Josh Peck:
Yo, Joliet and Elwood, it's me, representing Nickelodeon
Don’t step these brothers ‘less you wanna tussle both of ‘em
We’ll put the blue in you brothers, you're  pathetic,  yo
With this flow we'll show why our show has so many episodes!

Drake Bell:
I've had enough of your ''soul'', so let me play my guitar!
I'm Drake Bell! I’ll wring you out while I spit bars
So keep your briefcase locked, you're about to get shocked
Go back to that prison with your Jailhouse rock!
(Drake) Look at it from our Belleview (Josh) you utterly suck!

Drake Bell:
Please just stop playing music, for that I'll pay 5000 bucks!

Josh:
I'm a straight A student, these Muppets got nothing up their sleeve!
(Josh) Thinking you can take us? (Drake) You're both crazier than Steve!
(Josh) I ain't callin you a truther so you losers better scram
(Drake) You two's talent is almost as hidden as our lamb!
(Josh) You claim you've got Soul, Man, (Drake) you'll still be beaten!

Drake and Josh:
And we could sum it up why in about 2000 different reasons!

Jake Blues:
All Drake cares about is being popular in school
And Josh's magic tricks make him look like a fool
You've should’ve Rawhid versus brothers so cool
Black suit and glasses, you know that we rule!

Elwood Blues:
Here we have two boobs, 

Jake Blues: well, I see four… 

Elwood Blues:
 Feel the rhythm and the blues with every hit of a chord 
Everybody needs somebody to love, but you both aren't it
We conquered every problem to save our orphanage!
(Elwood) These teenage dramaqueens (Jake) are obviously flawed

Elwood:
You fools can't stop us, we're on a mission from God!
(Jake) We're like Riders in the Sky (Elwood) and we ain't faking

Jake & Elwood: 
How can you think of beating us if you lose to Megan?

(Drake) Look, Josh!(Josh) they're shaking!(Drake and Josh) haha, high five!

(Drake) what would your career be without Saturday Night Live?

Drake Bell:
The best duo in the entertainment industry, there ain't no other

Josh Peck:
We're owning these fools so HUG ME, BROTHAH

Josh Peck:
I've got a bone to Peck with you two, slap you like it’s ping pong

Drake Bell:
If you can’t withstand our heat, keep your sunglasses on!
(Josh) I'm not gonna Give you some Lovin' (Drake) me neither, bro!

Drake and Josh:
Why don't you go back to your sweet home and Chiga-go!

Jake Blues:
Defeating Jake and Elwood, hell would have to freeze over

Elwood Blues:
We'll hit you with the bluesmobile like your names were both Oprah!
(Jake) The MC's of R&B spit such rhythm (Elwood) Yeah, we take it easy, man!

Jake Blues:
Flipping you the foam finger so you’ll throwdown again!
(Elwood) You've got a stupid cliché show (Jake and Elwood) don't deny it, Bell.

Elwood Blues:
The white trash, brain-dead version of Kenan and Kel!
(Jake) The Blues Brothers won this (Elwood) we're simply fantastic!

Jake and Elwood:
Go back to entertaining kids, we've got a cult classic!

WHO WON?
WHO’S NEXT?
YOU DECIDE!
EPIC RAP BATTLE PARODIES

Drake & Josh vs The Blues Brothers

Let’s start this off with a speedy diss ‘cause before you even know
This battle’s gonna be over ‘cause your ass is too slow!
I’ve raced a lot of bullets and I’ve still got them trophies!
I could wreck you, two seconds later I’ve got my groceries
Your back story's pretty tragic, though not very factual
And how you got your powers seems pretty frickin’ magical
I take down foes listening to classical, I’m fanatical 
Your acts are way too theatrical and quite impractical
Vibrating so fast it breaks glass, now that’s tactical
Attacking this sack of crap isn’t problematical
Defeating me is irrational, man I’m supernatural
You can open your mandible, guess what? I’m all natural
Sure you’ve got your own show, well I’ve got the Avengers
Doing circles around you like you’re a fruit in a blender! 
Just remember! The early bird gets the worm, surrender!
As you finally acknowledge this swift storm you’ve entered!

Flash:
I shouldn’t repeat, but it seems you didn’t catch my verse
But it’s worth it for this jerk to realize he’s the worst!
I’ve yawned a thousand times since you got in my way
You wake up in the morning while I’m chilling in the next day!
Get played, this noob is getting chewed up like a steak!
Go play videogames while your mom makes a souffle!
I see you’ve got ping pong, but that’s really about all
It looks as if your eyes are TOO focused on your balls!
They call you Quicksilver, cause you always come in second place!
In the time of your verse I could drop the whole mutant race!
Let me savor this moment, too bad it wouldn’t last
I’d hook up with your sister but she’d say I’m too fast
You grew up so poor you had to live off only the land!
At least I didn’t meet my own father second hand!
I'm the thunder strike, the flash of light, prepared to fight in Blackest Night
Why try to defeat me when I’m not even in your sight?

Quicksilver:
Wipe out the mutant race? You couldn’t step to the brotherhood!
I’m a better guy without giving a care about the greater good!
Giving powers to your nephew cause you’re so damn responsible
Even a shot with my sister? Well, isn’t that just plausible!
Super-Speed, Google it! I'm the first result to show!
You’re still just a human Barry, can’t take that mutant flow
Teleporting my molecules, leaving red suit here screwed!
Now allow me to show you what mach ten can really do!

Flash:
Mach ten? Please, I’m the fastest man alive!
Deprived of friendship, but you still thrive to strive!
I’ve altered all of reality, what have you done lately?
You’re so lazy, while everything I do is completed bravely!
I got that forensic science, chemistry, and criminology
Treading the whole globe, a master with geography!
I'm the fastest in any world, you're too slow it's tragicomic!
I'll catch you later, gotta go fast, I'm SUPERSONIC!


The Flash VS Quicksilver - Epic Rap Battles of Comic Books #9

Frenzy as King Tut
Froggy as Yugi/VGRB as Yami

Lyrics:
EPIC RAP BATTLE PARODIES
KING TUT
VS
YUGI MUTO
BEGIN

King Tut:
Flow like the Nile, disses hot like the land that I rule
Gonna leave this grandaddy's boy royally schooled
Bust your nose like the Sphinx, King Tut brings the thunder
No Magician can save you boy, I'm the eighth world wonder!
I will diss a mindless kid from ’96 in hieroglyphs!
He’ll find that my design’s divine, I’m twice as big as Cairo is!
The golden-aged boy king from the ancient era's
‘bout to go Apophis on this gothic Goku in mascara.

Yugi Muto:
Tutan, Khamun (come on)! if you really want to duel,
i’ll activate my trap card under your bejeweled stool!
My friends give me strength, believe in the heart of the cards
A mummy broken as you isn’t worthy of my graveyard

King Tut:
I’ll banish your little deck up your anime anus!
My legacy is ageless, while you became Nameless!
Your franchise is founded on myself, Ra and Isis
Now D-D-D-Disappear with your silly identity crisis

Yugi:
YU-GI-OHHHHHH

Yami:
Of all your tall tales there’s one thing I trust:
your discovery proved that you’re nothing but a ‘bust'!
It's time to duel! I'm the king of Games
and your the off-spring of an incestuous tomb-raid!
You claim that you reign, but now I’ve been summoned,
and I'll leave you puzzled for millenniums coming!
Your life points are low, you're getting overwhelmed
You just was Yu-Gi-Owned, and sent to the Shadow Realm

King Tut vs Yugi Muto

@jmbraps as Toon Link
@stofferex as Paper Mario

Toon Link:
A new legend was born, and he’s here to teach this man a lesson
I’m saving Hyrule while you’re busy buying contact lens
What’s your puny hammer got against my Master Sword, kid?
I would stomp you flat, but you’ve already beat me to it
Using the Wind’s Requiem to blow your paper back to town!
You better run before I use these Iron Boots to squash you down!
You suck more than my Gust Jar, so I won’t hear another word
when I whip out my Pacci’s Cane and use it to flip you the bird!

Paper Mario:
This grandmama’s boy just stepped up to the wrong mascot
The RPG master’s gonna snap this win without a Picto Box!
A schizophrenic with a talking boat are trash for the millienia
I’ll switch to 3D mode and kick you back to Pennsylvania
A twelve year old boy trying to be Poseidon
While I’m Morphing into airplanes to crash into your little islands!
I’m the super duper trooper ruler attacking this junior!
Your appearance in Smash was more useless than the Tingle Tuner

Toon Link:
Someone’s jealous that Doctor Mario was the chosen clone!
Bring your brother to this battle and I’ll show you how to smash Bros.!
Throw you in the paper shredder and leave you in the Royal Crypt
You’ll take a turn for the worse with a Spin Attack, so just split!
Now onwards, and forwards! We’ll wreck you with Four Swords!
You’re Borderline horrible, Door more disappointing than Pandora
Useless! I wouldn’t even crumple you up in a ball for my plumbing!
Your rhymes were worse than Sticker Star, and that’s saying something

Paper Mario:
Mama Mia, has it not crossed these four blind mice
That their ginormous Rupee Wallet won't help them pay the price?
While I’m feeling up Flurry, you four latch each other’s Hookshots
Give up now, because all your efforts are just for X-Naught!
Your time is running out! Hourglass won’t help you little boy!
So take another step closer and you’ll get sucked into the Void
I’d rather deal with Tingle’s quest, than listen to this ingrate
Just like Zess T.’s recipes, all your games were just Mistakes!

Toon Link vs Paper Mario

Nightwing - Justin Buckner
The Winter Soldier - Woodenhornets

LYRICS:

Nightwing (0:14):
Fighting crime in the midst of night, you won’t stand in my way
You’re an example of a soldier whom I will not obey
After I proceed to break the silence with this lyrical mass
you’ll find that your super strength will not protect your ass!
I won’t put up with your crap, to me you’re nothing but a coward
Unless having a bionic arm is now a super power
Get caught on another plane, escort you from this fight!
You don’t think you should fear me? I was trained by the Dark Knight!
Hiding in the shadows I strike when you least expect me!
Hand it to the kid commando’s, you really don’t look too hefty
So come on Bucky boy, let’s do some hand to hand!
Set down your little guns and you can face me like a man!

Winter Soldier (0:54):
Is this some kind of joke? Did you just crawl out of Arkham
Cause you must be insane if you think you’ll cause any problems
When the Winter Soldier steps up there is nothing you can do
Take position, aim and shoot! Conquer you like World War Two!
-pause-
(1:11)
I’ve taken down some evil men, done things that you can’t understand
Watched some assholes stomp my land, came out living with just one hand
That didn’t stop me, I’ll watch you cower, call me Energizer cause I got the power
Put your name down in history as the little bitch who had to retreat
Step on you with my combat boots, too late now, no chance for a truce
Your fighting style, I’m not a fan, You’re a lackey to a bat, now who’s the man?
I’ll break right through your crap defence, shots’ve been fired, get in the trench
Defeating night with a bit of light, you can hurry away and leave my sight

Nightwing (1:39):
Are you gonna betray this battle like Steve, and try to kill me?
You’re a villain Bucky, just forget those military duties
You’re not only good, I know, I hear those words you’re bluffin’
In the water lay your body, found by some psycho russians
Whatever, you squeeze, you think you’re cooler than the Tundra?
Well you can get down on your knees and Hail MY frickin’ Hydra!
Did jealousy fill your brain? Just keep practicing your stretching!
Maybe you’ll catch up with Cap and see that Winter is now ending

Winter Soldier (2:06):
I know you’d really enjoy that, Mister 50-Shades-of-Grayson!
And you’ll find that in the army, sometimes rules need breakin’
I’m super-human fucker and I won’t put up with this!
Acting all in charge because you used to lead some kids?
Gee Williker’s, it’s time to get yet another identity
I may have caused injustice, but here you’re the enemy 
A final assault will have your ass looking lifeless
‘cause I’m about to render this dark birdy flightless


Lewis And Clark VS Calvin And Hobbes

IRBoC

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