‘And there’s something here perhaps that the body is offering you, something wanting, something, raw, something hurting…. Inviting it to feast at the table, the fullness of this experience, being empathically received in presence, just letting g it be the way it wants to be, allowing it to find it’s own way into its own healing and wholeness all in good time.’
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How do you approach yourself other than react, attack, freeze, overwhelm, dissociate, the deep grooves of repetition and habit?  Find out how to flourish and thrive.....the focusing way.

‘This is the alchemy that turns ore into gold, carbon into diamonds, pupa into butterflies.  The butterfly of the felt sense knows its own freedom, is unbounded, and natural…..’

‘We are intimately connected, we are all born of stardust and heat form the sun, and from the waters of the mighty oceans and lakes, from the earth, from the space around us. There is innate wisdom in these elements as they combine into animation, into us, just being available to this mystery of the life that runs through  us, how amazing.‘

‘This is the matrix for creativity, healing, flow the fresh edge that knows its own way, that knows its own direction, without restraint, without patterning, expressing itself in the moment spontaneously, playfully even.’

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Exquisite Alchemy of Focusing Support Attunements Reflections Exercises

These Playcises invite the Body to reclaim it's Soveriegn identity, shifting away from the thinking mind as owner to offer the possibility of deeper peace and presence

NOTICING Playcise 1 What This Body Is Noticing

Invite a very deep resting in the body as it reclaims its own sovereign nature. 

"Herein, Bahiya, you should train yourself thus: 'In the seen will be merely what is seen; in the heard will be merely what is heard; in the sensed will be merely what is sensed; in the cognized will be merely what is cognized.' In this way you should train yourself, Bahiya.

NOTICING Playcise 3. What The BODY Is Noticing and Letting It REST In ITSELF

Here's a practical approach to inviting deep peace and rest very quickly, without forcing out thinking, allowing for a natural and magical transformation. The body provides a safe haven of stability and peace, find out how.

NOTICING Playcise 2 Noticing and Resting With it.

The 4th Playcise adding to the trilogy of 'What the Body is Noticing' Playcises, to include feelings in the body.

NOTICING Playcise 4. Noticing Sensations and Feeling Tone in the Body Focusing Invitations

How do we meet feelings and parts safely without overwhelm?  As soon as we learn to meet parts, we can have relationship and begin healing journey. The first thing we need to do is create safety, through grounding and containment.  The second is to engage in relationship proper and learn to welcome rather than engage in the default attack, freeze, overwhelm of retreat.

Safety Grounding Welcoming and Compassionate Hello to Parts.

Maybe a felt-sense is rather akin to how a bird lands on a branch. I have an image of a Shrike, the Japanese bird, that lands on reed, and the reed gives slightly, but the Shrike is fine, it's on this reed and the reed is undulating slightly.  There is something about that that is so subtle and so gentle and the Shrike just takes off and the reed returns upright.  Its not a bulldozer! 

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Shrike on a Bending Reed the Subtle Felt Sense

How do we come into relationship with our feelings?  Normally default mode settings of ignore, repress, overwhelm, blame, evaluate, fix etc.  These modes perpetuate the continued arising of these feeling-story patterns.  How do we get out of heh 'closed loop' of the thinking mind?  In this playcise we explore how to come from embodiment to connect with a feeling.... it is not a definitive approach to relationship with feelings but a vital part of the relational process.

Playcise 4 What The Body Noticing and Feeling Tone Emotion Mood

Focusing most certainly about experience and relationship.  We are inviting an exquisite relating, you could say everything is relating to everything; ‘To see the universe in a grain of sand’ Blake of course.  Indiras net too.  The key quality here is Availability, synonymous to openness, although perhaps more than that, we are waiting to ‘hear back’ from the universe.  Letting things be and allowing also feature here, and there’s more than the thinking mode, as Gene Gendlin said ‘Dead end stories and dead end feelings.’  Its as if we are a giant Redwood, our roots burrowing down into the fertile, rich aromatic soils, drawing up the nutrients.  Rooting, grounding and earthing, stable and strong to the elements. Yielding gently to the winds but not breaking, the leaves and branches dancing in the big blue, rising up towards the starriness of things. Letting the body rest in the body as it senses into the breathing.

Playcise 4 Body Noticing and Aliveness Focusing Quality

The imaginal and Presence, how do they connect?  For me the ‘Imaginal’ can be very dissociated from Presence.  People can talk ABOUT an Elk, ABOUT stars, etc does it offer a true heart connection with the essence of that element? 

What came earlier was an image of a fire, and someone dressed in a bear or Bison skin with their head covered by a fur, and he’s sat around a fire, and all faces glowing are expectant, looking up at this soothsayer, this bard and above are the stars, its almost like everything is partaking of the depths, this portal of the universe is about to utter and speak through this voice. And then the sharing takes place. The animals speak through this voice, the ancestors speak though this voice, the Mystery speaks through this voice. People are present, spirits are present, forms from other worlds.  And what it is that brings alive, what otherwise could be dead forms? And as we share there can be an availability to the earth, from which this body and your body are manifestations, this is the Universe speaking, and this is for each of us the universe is listening its kind of speaking and listening to itself, its inviting resonance and correspondence, so there can be an availability to the spaciousness and the stars above something can resonance from this stardust body to the sea of stars. Just sensing how your felt sense receives this invitation, this evocation, this incantation to be befriended by the mystery of these stars.  And indeed, even hearing birdsong, and what utters forth from the sound of a bird, or the sound of a river gushing, or waves lapping.  Maybe there are some metaphors or symbols that are personal to you that might appear for some correspondence or resonance just by the quality of availability from Presence.  And the felt sense will carry a meaning which is very unique and fresh in the revelation in what wants to be revealed through it, it can live itself forward through the felt sense into its next steps or inspired expression. Yes, it can live itself forward through the next steps gestures and expression that wants to be offered through this sensing. The story is alive and ‘storying’  through you.

The Imaginal Symbol and Metaphor Alive through Presence Attunement

From a focusing perspective, how do we entertain the felt sense and not just the story and feeling. We all have our own takes on this, a certain person., a relationship that has gone wrong, etc, we can get overwhelmed with the feeling and the story, this is not the felt sense.  We cannot control the worldly winds; we can respond creatively through a relationship with the felt sense.   The first port of call is ‘Pausing and settling’ Allow the body to sense contact and a visceral sense of the ground, and allowing the body to permeate into itself, settling into itself, coming from the contact with the ground.  Inviting an empathic quality of noticing the ground, and come from there to the part, especially if strong feelings.  We can come into relationship in this way.  And perhaps that part is wanting you to know something is important, I am making room a space with you, to listen and be with you unconditionally.  So, a felt sense is not just a felling, but we go to that and become curious around the edges of that feeling, there is something more there, its not just the feeling but want is behind it – it’s called the fuzzy edge, the unclear edge, there is a lot of not-knowing in that.  This is a portal into what want s to be shared from its depths, its not a demand or an attempt to fix, just be with it. And at some point, you will note what is called a felt shift, it’s been so well received the more behind it comes through there is a sense of lightness or felt shift, it is no longer in your face, you can co-habit, there is a lot of space now leaving a sense of freshness, openness and spaciousness, it’s called the fresh edge. This edge is the emergence into a new patterning. As Gene Gendlin, the founder has said, every part within us has its own healing mechanism, it has its own sense of rightness it will follow if supported in this quality of unconditional empathic presence.

Deep Dive Exploration into the Felt Sense Focusing Attunement

Focusing is a bit like an adventure, it certainly an invitation to explore and one of the most important faculties is curiosity, an availability to what we don’t know we don’t know.  As Goethe said, ‘what we know gets in the way of knowing’ Sometimes some parts of us feel closed, or trapped even, sometimes its like that for parts of us.  So, this is the beginning of an adventure! Pausing is where we start, we can do this anywhere anytime.  What’s alive to what’s alive? Curiosity might have an element of excitement, like a child playing.  Perhaps something in us remembers what it is like to be childlike, carefree and open?  This adventure is endless, timeless and infinite, and also timebound and corporeal. This mystery- being breathed by this mystery, making room to explore the inner landscape with compassion and warmth, and to adventure into the infinite inside and outside.

Adventuring your Fresh Edge Focusing Attunement

Focusing attunements are an invitation into the ‘More’. Presence is the Well of plenty, you never get to the bottom of that one. So it’s an open ended container, when we consider the sensing as the container. We can include space a part of the containing, then it is infinite. Presence fundamentally has no boundary.  Something in us can get that, a sense of the infinite, beyond the confines of the skin, is space.  So maybe just being available to this sense of spaciousness and even in an ordinary way we can sense it in the breathing.  So, there is space in the breath in the flow of breathing, s sense of rhythm and movement is here. And as the body breathed out, it can sense out beyond into the room into the space outside, above the clouds, up into that sea of celestial bodies, the heavens, that sea of diamonds. And there can be some kind of rest here, it just kind of rests in itself. At the same time the more visceral nature of the sensing can sense gravity pulling the body down, at least the earth body, a very compact solid sense of itself, inviting safety, grounding balance, a quality of being cantered. Perhaps something an rest in this quality of grounding in the visceral body and at the same time, knowing it is not a boundary in itself, it is the anchor in the universe, with no boundaries. And in all of this is the felt sense, what is alive here, the whole thing.  What is alive is often trying to claim a small portion of the universe, declaring to be utterly so. We say hello to all that! Sitting in the relational field, sensing the part and the whole.  The whole that has no boundary, and saying hello from the whole to the part, it may be more infinitely complex than that, sitting int eh poetry of the invitation. In this way, a quality of flow and movement is invited, that too can just rest in itself. The whole of this can just rest in itself.

The Infinite Relational Presence Field Focusing Attunement

Focusing in the context of the felt-sense.  The felt sense is a bit of an enigma.  Its not really a thing.  I don’t think it’s a thing that is within us, even. Its something that manifests when we meet ourselves in a certain way. My sense is that there is an alchemy that kind of co-creates a felt sensing. So it really is on the edge of our evolution, it is an invitation into forward movement in the living moment when more often than not our experience is claimed and lived through the thinking mind, and that is just very repetitive, if not painful. The felt sense really is a mystery, it’s the meaning body that emerges, seemingly from latent old patterns, holding patterns. These holding patterns are waiting to be released into their freshness, and that is a very subtle process indeed it's really not a technique, you can’t do it through techniquing – its more ‘caught’ than taught and requires a consistent availability to meet life in this open space of availability, and then this felt sensing reveals itself more and more. And we always begin with what we 'don’t know we don’t know,' the felt sense is always beyond what we don’t know we don’t know, we can’t know it. we can only live from it and through it, in the moment.  And we begin here with the pause, it’s a portal the pause, the Pause Portal, just inviting rest in the sensing and from the sensing.  Grounding and earthing as the body is invited to sense the ground beneath it in whatever form, resting in and from these sensation of touch, very directly, earthing and grounding invites a visceral whole of the body sensing alive to itself from itself, alive to the space around it, sounds and beyond the four walls, alive to spaciousness which is infinite , infinite, with a sea of diamonds an ocean of diamonds, astral bodies, the heavens, the celestial realms, the milky ways, the super nova’s, the comets, the shooting stars. Perhaps we too are shooting stars, made of stardust. And in all of this sensing, the life within, something is alive here, inside the tummy, chest or throat, like a feeling emotion or mood, running through the body maybe more contracted, spacious or even open? Whoever we are we cannot not have experience. We can choose to not relate to it, but we are always in relationship, the question is what quality of relationship do we invite for the freshness to come forward, or repetition from the old, or both maybe. Sitting in the vastness sensing within saying a little 'Hello' to all that’s there with a sense of kindness and care, compassion, tenderness….. In this way keeping company in beauty, with care, resting here.
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Shooting Star Diamond Skies Subtle Felt Sensing Attunement

An image came to me, of my friend who was into gliding a lot, he told me about a new glider. He said, ‘You know, when you are up about 5000 feet, up in the sky and you start spinning out of control because you hit turbulence or some strong disturbance, what do you do?’ I said, ‘I don’t know, pray perhaps?’! Summon all the gods?  ‘No, that’s probably not going to help you. With the new gliders what you do is not do anything, take your hands off the control stick and you let go, and the glider self corrects’.  Curious, so it’s spinning down from 5000 feet, down to the ground, who knows how long that would take? But you let go and the glider self corrects, I was very taken with that ability for the glider to self-correct and for it to reconnect with a sustainable flight trajectory.  In the middle of a spin, what is the automatic reaction?  Get hold of something, to hang on.  Maybe creativity and Focusing are somewhat analogous to that glider situation, that in the clunkiness of life in the challenges of life, something in us wants to hang on, to manipulate a direction, navigate to the original course, to get that comfort, and the last thing it wants to do, is to come into Presence. I believe that’s the analogy, coming into presence is an availability that is not trying to manipulate anything, it just comes into the open place; Grounded, open available presence. In which that something is playing itself out, so we move from ‘I am anxious. I am going to lose my job’ … ‘Something in there’ is like that right now, and now in the relational field of being with that something…. The glider from that spin starts to level out into an altitude that is stable. Its like that, so focusing is an invitation into the quality of stability and groundedness. Something unstable can be there but a bigger stability founded in presence can surround that even. Then the glider can land somewhere, right! Then we can get out of the cockpit, mop our brow, and say, ‘Wow that was a real ride, ride’ right.

Glider in a Spin what not to do in a panic Focusing reflection.

"Certainly, Focusing and the Dharma are not separate in this world. They are like the ocean and the horizon, and the great sky above—not separate, breathing itself, living itself, reveling in the majesty of things."
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"The fullness of itself rests in the fullness of itself. In this way, there is no polarity, but neither would one call it non-duality, so no duality and no non-duality."

"Presence rests in Presence. So, I guess my language for the Great Liberation, you could say, is Presence: Pre-Sence, that which comes before sense, that Mystery."

"Focusing is not about focusing. When something becomes about something, Buddhism becomes about Buddhism, or Nonviolent Communication becomes about NVC, it’s as if we go to a revolving door and we keep revolving around inside it."

"The function of a revolving door is to act as a portal into the very space or different space that you are wanting to get to."

"Hopefully what is happening is I am entering my Humanity more deeply. It’s a natural expression of my Humanity, Focusing, NVC, Mindfulness, Buddhism, they are not about themselves, they are pointing beyond themselves in a way."

"All true liberation teachings, according to her, always point to direct experience. If they are pointing to ‘Talking about’ Enlightenment, the great freedom etc, then they are not the true teaching, they are merely a dichotomy promoting and reinforcing itself."

"She mentions this term ‘Being Perception’—becoming perception, entering the realm of perception, as if we drop into the realm of perception rather than talking about it, in this way becoming awareness itself."

"The felt sense is the heart of Gene Gendlin’s Focusing, not feeling, but the felt sense, which is more than a feeling, it’s the inclusive whole to an experience that is alive."

"When there is a whole perception of itself, it is an invitation into full sensory awareness from its own terms as it drops into itself, so to speak, there is neither a duality nor a non-duality, and it just rests in itself."

"As this body here is listening to these sounds, so to speak, it can also notice the earth, the body can sense the whole shape of itself even as these sounds manifest and the spaciousness from the skin’s perspective, as it were, radiating out beyond these four walls up into the blue or dark night sky with a trillion shimmering diamonds."

"It’s the pregnant empathic pause from the whole sense of itself, and as this does so, and as the words and labels and interpretations, as it were, are just offered to space in the totality of things, they no longer have dominion over creating a split."

"The whole of this that owns itself, that, as it were, is hearing back from itself, or even as it were, is pausing in the hearing, the availability of the hearing back from itself, the whole of itself, the whole of itself hears back from the whole of itself."

"The map is not the territory, the finger pointing to the moon is the finger pointing to the moon, this is invariably an invitation for the moon and the light of the moon to inhabit itself. It just bathes itself in its own light."

"Focusing has been a portal for me personally into the mystery of the whole of this, playing itself out. Focusing, which of course, is not about focusing!"

Focusing Insight Duality Non-duality & the Wisdom of The Felt Sense

An exploration around what it means to come into relationship with parts of ourselves.  Focusing is about exquisite relationship, it’s about the relational field that we can inhabit fully, but normally, to be fair, we have learned the Cartesian paradigm, of ‘I think therefore I am’ something believes it is fixed, and it lives in its head, something like that. And it’s anchored into thinking as its core identity.  So, Gene Gendlin offered the Focusing paradigm realising that the sensing home, was the heir to meaning, to life itself, to a flourishing quality of living that was not hostage purely to ideas, beliefs and thoughts. So, this is just a quick, how do we meet and greet parts of ourselves how do we say hello to them, in a way that honour them, that can begin the process of healing and forward movement. Well, quire simply, we just pause, in the chaos and movement, its still going to be chaotic and moving, but something in us is a bit stiller. 
This something stiller can sense feet on the earth the body on the seat/settee, and the sensing body can just begin to land in itself more fully, clothing on the skin, breathing in the breathing, whole body breathing, and if you like you can place your hand on your chest or tummy, it sometimes helps. Allowing your body to sense outwards into space, into your room, and beyond up into that sea of stars. We are born of course from that sea of stars, we are stardust, stardust on the edge of its own growth and evolution. The universe with its hand on its chest or tummy, sensing within inviting a gentleness, a care, a warm awareness, and giving what ever is inside here, lots of space to be the way it wants to be to come alongside us if it will let us, to keep it company. It is a something inside of us, some body of experience, clear or not clear. Or not a lot going on, we can welcome that. And if you like, if its ok by it, just offering a little kindly hello, I’m just keeping you company, from the whole of this, and you can find a home in your own unique way I call this Embodied Relational Presence. As we complete, I am not abandoning anything, I can keep close to you if you want me to or give you space, and remaining in presence as we complete, if that works for you.

Compassionate Approach Saying Hello to Vulnerability Within

Letting Things Be the Way They Want to Be
I think, in my own focusing evolution, I’ve changed tack slightly. I’ve shifted my approach to letting things be the way they want to be. Now, it feels more contextual for me. There’s an awareness around it that I didn’t have before.
Recently, I worked through a small bubble of old trauma. Occasionally, it still comes through a little, and the process has been quite interesting—at times, even intense. But yes, in true focusing fashion, when something arises, you receive it, make space for it, and say:
"Hello! There you are! This is it?"
I would like to add something to this principle. I believe we each learn, in our own way, how to relate to different parts of ourselves. It’s not just about passively letting things be the way they want to be; it’s about receiving something fully. It’s an incoming—an incoming experience, an incoming awareness.
Classically, we might push against it, repress it, or freeze. But in focusing, we come into full relationship. Full relationship means being open to receiving, but also open to offering back—a way to be with what arises.
For example, when something turns up, we say: “Hello.” That itself is a response. Over time, I’ve come to understand the subtle dance of receiving fully—letting something be as it wants to be, rather than partially, which can take time.
Sometimes, when past trauma surfaces, I find myself offering it information or inviting it to explore something. This can be done through open questions. You might sit with yourself and say:
"Hello… Oh yes, it’s like that. And now, it’s moving into this… or shifting slightly. It’s becoming less intense… or maybe more intense."
That’s what we do, right? But I think there’s also a more active side of focusing. We can offer something like:
"How would 'all okay' be for you right now?"
"How would 'all okay' begin to be for you in good time?"
"What would bring more ease, peace, or resolution to this part within the whole of you?"
These are gentle, respectful invitations. There’s a practice called dyads that involves listening to these invitations. They’re quite beautiful, and I’d love to explore them more.
This is where my perspective has shifted: I now see that letting things be the way they want to be includes offering. There are caveats to this, of course, and I wouldn’t suggest it lightly. But if a new way of being presents itself, it can be gently offered.
I’ve been experimenting with this and have noticed some interesting shifts. Sometimes, I say:
"I’m inviting you to sense more spaciousness, more ease, more peace right now."
This might be pushing the boundaries of traditional focusing, as it usually doesn’t involve such direct guidance. But I’m playing with it, and I’m finding that it brings fascinating results. I offer this with deep respect and sensitivity because, ultimately, it’s for each individual to explore in their own way.

Letting things Be the way they want to Be reflection

So I was asking you—how do you know when you're moving into a healing mode? And how do you know when you're not?
What's happening inside of you? What's going on in there?
How do you know?
Do you know? 
Because sometimes I say to myself, when there's an edge, when it's a bit challenging: Where's the healing edge in all of this? Is it in the whole thing? All of it? Because I'm not quite sure where it is. So I just ask: Where's the healing edge in all of this?
And I wait, you know.
Sometimes, it comes back and gives me something—maybe a certain shape in the body.
Sometimes, it doesn’t. But it's like—oh, it's like that.
It’s like that in there.
That’s the healing edge. Oh, okay. And then I can say hello to that, right?
So it's an open curiosity rather than an interrogative, pointed question. See what I’m saying?
For me, the question is: Where does the felt sense begin? And where does it end?
And I'm asking you with curiosity—where does the felt sense begin, and where does it end?
Just drop into that. Ask your whole body—what does that mean to it?
Does it begin in the heart area? The tummy? The throat? The face?
And where does it end? Around the shape of the heart? In the torso?
Does it begin in the sternum? Or is it more intense there?
Wherever it might be—does it radiate outward?
Does it end where the feet meet the ground?
Where the body meets the chair, or the bed?
Does it end at the skin, with the sensation of clothing?
Or does it extend to the shape of the room, or even beyond?
Where is it alive?
And if there’s something going on—say, a bird chirping or sunlight on your face—is that part of the felt sense? Or not?
What do you mean by the felt sense?
This is really important when it comes to healing.
Because—what’s the point of it?
I mean, maybe it’s heresy to ask—why do we have a felt sense?
I mean, it’s so mechanistic. But if you did ask, it’d be interesting to see what answer comes back—if anything comes back.
And if it did, it wouldn’t be a definitive answer.
I don’t think it would be. It would probably be quite complex.
Or maybe the answer would come through a gesture, or a sound, a symbol or metaphor
So—is the felt sense static? Or dynamic?
Is it in one place? Or many places?
Can you sense it in the whole experience? Or just in a part of it?
All these curiosities—along with many others—are questions.
And they all relate to the meaning of healing.
Because—well, what is healing?
And how does something know how to offer freshness from the old?
How does it know how to do that—especially with something that’s been stuck for 10 or 20 years?
And then, suddenly—there’s a surprise when you feel that melting into something genuinely different.
There’s a freshness appearing.
Where does that appear in a felt sense?
So—those curiosities.
Yeah. I’m wondering how that lands with you—without coming so much from your head.

.

Tsunami Surfing, Healing, Liberation and the Thrill of the Felt Sense Reflection

Sitting with the Felt Sense
The felt sense comes alive when we sit alongside something and be with it just as it is. This is perhaps the most challenging thing a human can do. On one hand, you don’t want to be with it. On the other, how do you be with it? And what is it, anyway? Many things come up around that. Yet when one entertains it, I believe it can be incredibly inspiring. Something in you will catch it and go, “Right. Okay.” It’s like one’s whole universe potentially shifts. When one is entertained by the felt sense, it's like Lyra, Philip Pullman's character with the subtle knife. She cuts through the air and enters another reality. I think that’s exactly it. The Edge of the Map
There’s a deep sigh of recognition about what’s heard here. It’s continually reminding itself of that, because it’s not a habit. It can’t be. That’s the beauty. It’s on the borderline of habit and non-habit. It’s at the edge of the map. You come to the edge of the map, and then what? It’s freeform. It’s like finding a whole new map. But the map can be different every time. A whole new place. Multi-dimensional. And it can only be a map in retrospect. You can’t have the map to begin with—it’s not there. Map is linear. This is more multi-dimensional. The map runs out, and you look back and go, “Oh, now I have a new map.” You can’t look forward with that map. It’s a new kind of way of being.

Metaphor, Creativity, and the Limit of Language
It’s very nourishing just to chat about it. Something in me gets it. It’s like that. It can only ever be a “like that” from this perspective. In a way, it’s another map—a metaphor or symbol. Like a pair of wings, like a surfboard. I talk about surfing. But maybe you have your own metaphor that fits better. This is where true creativity happens. It’s the place of the artist, the creative to create. And if someone is creating from a map, they’re not truly creating.

Shifting Paradigms
It’s a different paradigm. It’s liberating. I was talking to a friend. I used the phrase "going south." We’re a bit far north—let’s go south. It’s tough. Then they talked about being below the waterline—what’s happening there? We recognize that from different traditions. In a sense, we’re coming to the same point. And then the whole conversation calmed. And it was like—that’s it.

All We Have Is Relationship
Relationship. That’s it. We’re not having a relationship—we are relationship. We are interaction. We’re not having an interaction. The relational field is always alive. When you stop thinking about people as fixable objects—relationship emerges. What brought me into this was wanting a better relationship with my wife. Then I realized I needed a better relationship with what’s going on in here. It turns out all we have is relationship. When you get there—it’s all relationship.

Felt Sense as Portal to Living
The felt sense is a portal into the “thisness” of direct living. You could say direct intuitive living, though intuition can be misunderstood. Korzybski, the Polish semanticist, said “the map is not the territory.” We need maps. But we don’t need to be fooled by them. The left brain is a map. People are fooled because they believe them. They believe dichotomous ways of seeing the world as absolutely true—when they are just maps. Language is a map. A belief is a map. But ultimately, it’s not true.

Perspective and the Limits of Knowing
There’s always another view. My teacher spoke of this: look at the Plough, your favorite constellation. It’s beautiful. But if you called someone on Mars and said, “The Plough’s out, can you see it?” they’d say, “What are you talking about?” From their view, it doesn’t exist. If you go toward it—after 30 billion light years—you’d be inside it, and it wouldn’t look constellated. What we take as real is relative. It’s only real from the perspective of the seer.

End of the Map and Felt Sensing Beyond  - Reflection

The Deer, the Forest, and the Tiger

It's a bit like sitting next to a deer that comes out of a forest. You come down on your haunches and you wait. You see that deer. You don't run at it. You don't say, "Oh, there's a deer!" and run at the deer. It's like—oh my God, the deer runs off. Well, why wouldn't it? It knows something's there.

So we sit down. We wait. The deer comes close. The deer goes, "Oh, this is safe." And then it may finally come and lie down by you. And you go... you put your hand on the deer. Well, you might not. But there's a lot of beauty in this.

And then comes out a tiger. And we go, "Oh..." and then we really feel the ground. I mean, you look down slightly because you don't want to freak the tiger out, right? And we see its beautiful shape. It's a beautiful creature. Very, very beautiful. It's 500 pounds of sheer power and beauty, and it comes weaving over. It too sits down by the deer and by you. And you put your hands on both of them.

And you say: Welcome. That is presence.

Then the tiger gets up and wanders off. And you go, "Okay. It's cool." It's all me, in a way. 

Now there's a deep sigh because it recognizes the complexity of all that. And the beauty of befriending our monsters and our magicians, you know? And how they're not really there to attack us. They're there to serve us, really, underneath it all—if we take time to let them be and sit by them.

But we need to be in presence. We need to be grounded. That's the difference. Once we're there, whatever we do or say will be connecting.

And then Comes a Tiger

Presence Deep Rest Meditations and Reflections inspired by Focusing, Mindfulness and Nonviolent communication Embodied Relational Presence training and personal coaching.  https://www.living-presence.co.uk/

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Simon McKibbin Presence Meditations & Reflections