Lyrics AMV featured on IDLEGLANCE YouTube: https://youtu.be/Uay7fIDMJ0E 🖤

VIOLENCE (Prod. prodbytheswitch x prod.immortal)

Big love to:  https://soundcloud.com/akacarpenter
https://linktr.ee/Rivilin

mentally fucked in my own way devil wanna maintain 
another connection with me so I just cannot sustain
stomaching another fucking lie 
like you pull me into the abyss and smother out my eyes

playing naughts and crosses on my arms to tell if im alive
I don’t really feel the pain so I still question my life
so the devil tells me its just the god that I have to blame
gave me too much self-awareness so I think I am insane

seeing double fucking vision of the knife to my neck yeah
question if I really want to do this but I know that I just won’t
cus im a fucking coward yeah I admit, 
I couldn’t defend my friends, they let go in a fucking minute

tell me have you ever seen a flame extinguish by self-loathing
watch the light go out of their eyes as you know they’re not coping
so we sit in this room, watch the water rise above our necks
yeah I can’t catch my breath yeah I can’t feel a fucking thing

so I detest
about the way you fucking look at me, I feel your eyes burning so deep
and I confess
I couldn’t stand the way you spoke to me so I just cut off and fucking 
left this hell
where you welded shackles yeah all around and now im sinking further down
into myself
im building a wall above around my head so I hope i don’t let you fucking in

- AKA Carpenter

Oh, creep in the skin like an insect
Finding my solace I lay in the nest
and I soar like an albatross, I rest in the air

but im more like a phoenix, come burn me and test if I care
when you're looking your best, they stare,
so you better pose for a photo
I fuck with the voyeurs when they putting bread in my pocket
I'm only complaining the moment it stops

The eyes can weigh heavy like lead vests, be careful please
yeah you stole my heart like a vandal, oh, but you're there for me
I'm lost in myself and I lean on the lamp post, I'm embarrasing
I'm settling now with my fate, I take lemon and ice with the kerosene

Save Us Ft. AKA Carpenter

SHVDXW LVNDS (ft. GhostThaKid, Tsunami J. & Manhertz)

THE HEART BREAKS BONELESS (prod. ndot & Travis Barker)

@rivilin

Lyrics

Were sick of being just used by the ones that we love
Wont you say a quick pray and give our souls to the wind
So light a match in the dark and reach a hand out to me
Losing grip over time this god gave up easily

A drug fucked mess at the alter, no your prays no they don't, don't deceive me
I'm feeling sick from all this pressure, from the ones who say they care
I watched my family be abandoned by the church who said they'd be their
Even my family that my mother used to love, abandoned her when she was in need

I'm sick of being betrayed by a lover, so disgusted am I
I've became resilient to the affection that they deny through their eyes
Where were you when my mother needed help and my brother was so suicidal back then
I was just a kid trying to keep this family together but it wasn't enough

Tainted my blood with some DNA chains
Addiction runs in me genetical fate

My blood is so tainted
I can't help to crave it
I'm drowning in vomit when I be awakened

Abusing myself and I keep coming back
Sophia I'm sorry I left in a flash
I promise I miss you but shit I got issues
I'm trapped in this cycle of booze with a screw loose

I feel like everyday's the same
I say it every song cuz I mean what I say, aye
Like I'm tryna the face pain
But when its coming in the same wave, everyday
I feel just crushed by weight
Its hard to fucking stand up let alone feel okay
I know I feel disdain
At my own life so I fight it every day

I miss your face
The excited gaze
These autumn leaves, ain't feel the same

I lost it all
I gave it up
For a dream, no regrets, but fuck it sucks

I make mistakes
I feel the pain
Associated with me to blame

My life is fucked
Deep rooted mud
God gave it up, and I had enough

Were sick of being just used by the ones that we love
Wont you say a quick pray and give our souls to the wind
So light a match in the dark and reach a hand out to me
Losing grip over time this god gave up easily

Sophia

⸸ spotify ⸸

$LOTHBOI x Rivilin - Sophia

https://soundcloud.com/rivilin

Lyrics

Cus we sleep in the day, wake in the nighttime
My family’s concerned but all I can say is im fine
Mix a few more pills into my drink till life is sublime
Got no memory of yesterday so I don't decline

So we run, yeah we run and paint a new crime
Put me out like a cigarette im just a step to climb
Shaking from the past as we recess it back into our mind
Living on the edge of tomorrow so that we know we’re fine

Chilling outside a friend's house in the rain
Graffiti walls always stained with my name
In the overgrowth under the train tracks 
Were running from grey skies that blemish the pain

Circulation is running low all in my brain
Can't tell what's left from right as my vision fades
Waking up in a new place new face
Don't recognize a fucking thing I think the drugs ruptured my veins

Cus im running down Bradbury street
I thought if I kept running maybe the fog would clear and I would be fine
Cus you see depression doesn't work that way we numb the pain
With alcohol and drugs or anything that will fit in our veins

Another night another day wasted to my sleep, yeah but
I don't give a fuck cus then I don't control just how I think
Its easier to get lost in your dreams than deal with something  real
So if you wanna fucking talk then find me in a place where I don't exist

Cus we sleep in the day, wake in the nighttime
My family’s concerned but all I can say is im fine
Mix a few more pills into my drink till life is sublime
Got no memory of yesterday so I don't decline

So we run, yeah we run and paint a new crime
Put me out like a cigarette im just a step to climb
Shaking from the past as we recess it back into our mind
Living on the edge of tomorrow so that we know we’re fine

I'm on the edge
Living like I'm bouta fall
Head first, last looks up at shining stars

Thoughts sprinting through my brain like Usain go bolt
Fuck around ain't listen to talks, cuz they kinda dark

Why they fucking they judging me like they know what I've done
They see  tattoos and gold teeth and not the soul I got
What the fuck they want from me they looking in disgust
All these fucking exes but aint ever meet a family bruh

I gotta run lately
Light up from the blunt save me
Sprinting from my fucking past I know I gotta numb daily

Love a setting sun baby
Night is when I run, from these
Demons in my fucking brain that laughing at my dreams hating

Ima chase a fucking dream till the day I die
Thassa fucking fact put that on my fucking brothers lives
Boy I aint about all this pussy shit I see around
Keep it fucking real, unless I'm manic then I crumble down

Cus we sleep in the day, wake in the nighttime
My family’s concerned but all I can say is im fine
Mix a few more pills into my drink till life is sublime
Got no memory of yesterday so I don't decline

So we run, yeah we run and paint a new crime
Put me out like a cigarette im just a step to climb
Shaking from the past as we recess it back into our mind
Living on the edge of tomorrow so that we know we’re fine

Crumbling

$LOTHBOI x Rivilin - Crumbling

@rivilin

Lyrics

I say I'm happy but I'm not fake a smile it takes a lot
No energy feeling lost, what's the point now your gone
Plagued by nightmares where I'm shot, through the head and i wake up
Didn't think that was a dream, no I'm losing losing weak

Yeah i hear these ghost yeah outside my hallway
My windows covered in ash at the moment
I don't think ill ever escape from this
The walls start to breathe and the eyes just open up

Moving back and fourth like I'm in a body
Of some disfigured by product of hate
I guess ill make my home right here
I'm more comfortable being trapped inside then exposed
 
To the daylight of the morning
Where I hear pretty whispers just calling my name
And I wake up in a day dream
Thinking that you just went out to get coffee or you went to work

But yeah i know that it wasn't real
That's why i stay awake in the night time
So i know i don't get disappointed by the morning
When i wake and your not there

Cus you know this life gets a bit difficult at times
Yeah I don't think I'm coping i think that I'm lost
Yeah teetering on the edge of suicide
Like yeah do i do it or do i wait to die

Cus it feels like you picked out the gems from my bones
I was so beautiful now I'm empty and all alone
Cus you love to put your two hands in my insides
And you push me on the stage where I'm blinded by the light

Yeah I'm tripping on my own tongue try to find the words
Just to tell my family that im not ok, i hurt
Tell me when was the last time that anyone cared
Probably when you read my eulogy when im fucking dead

Everyone has their opinions on why i takes these fucking drugs
Yeah just to feel numb so i cant give a fuck
Im sick of overthinking about everything in my life
And you know youre fucked up too

Its crazy they don't get it
Just a-fucking-live cuz I got people that be caring
Standing on the edge and staring
At the faces warped from cries if took this step to end it

Walls be closing so I'm phoning in cuz I feel so lone
On the edge of it, cuz I'm on a binge and I know it shows
Sold my soul for shit boy this ain't a skit, man I feel so cold
Lost it in a f it, I was in a binge, can't take back those

So I live with it, and I loop a bit, and I loop a bit
Like I broken record I'm forgotten bitch
I know I got a problem, made a fucking list
Knowing I'm adding daily cuz I'm throwing fits

My mental state be going down a pit
I got a itch, which I gotta fix
Cuz I'm bleeding out from scratching all of it

These walls are closing in
Losing all my breath
Thinking did I live and life without a end

Gasping for a breath
Fighting for my friends
Fuck I gotta make it, I ain't ready yet

Gotta make amends
Cannot fly again
Off the handle, man I'm fucking losing it

Grounded by a bend
Blacking out again
Sober up until it happens all again

Fucked up I need to lay low
Beta blockers with the Faygo
Anxiety got me fucked up with these fake thoughts screaming lameo

So I close my eyes till it fade away
Open up and its another day
Another day issa another waste
Man I fucking hate, that I think this way

Losing It

$LOTHBOI x Rivilin - Losing It

@rivilin

Lyrics

Yeah, I swear that someone's fucking died in this room
I think it's haunted, I swear it’s haunted yeah
Feeling like there’s eyes just in the corner
They're watching me yeah, it's paranoia always

Feeling like im not worth much to you
It's what you said yeah, but they ignore ya and say that
The stars in the sky yeah they're not for you yeah
Cus they don't suit ya, cus your not perfect, not worthy

But I say fuck them they're all just cunts yeah
I'll build a staircase up and grab the things they denied you from the start
So fuck all of this negativity yeah, 
I don't want to be sad for the fucking rest of my life and you fucking know that

I'll show you that you’re worth just everything yeah
You know that id kill a fucking another just to see that you get home in the end
Cus I don't give a fuck about another
I just want you, yeah, to start the spark of the ember inside

Yeah cus I feel like your just the fucking one yeah 
The fucking one yeah, who puts a smile on my face
Im sick of fucking feeling like im scared yeah
Like im scared yeah but im not gonna waste this fucking  chance

Cus I never fucking thought id ever be happy yeah
I’d be happy yeah, so what the fuck have you just done to me
Cus you just make me want to be alive yeah,
Just believe yeah, I don't feel like I want to die early

What the fuck I'm in a dream
Everything can't be how it seems

This is too good to be true
Man I must've got some screws loose
Lost in my brain
No way this feeling fake

I been fucking happy lately
Just creating in my lane, please
No fucking lames, I just want this feeling safe

So baby don't you play me
Cuz it might just fucking break me
Might just lose my fucking life and take yours on the way b

Sorry, kind of crazy
My trauma fucking made me
A little bit fucked up and now my triggers got me shaking

But do not fucking worry cuz my empathy trump hate, I relate
To the fucking pain, I know we'll find a way
So just hang on to that feeling that I know you stashed away
Its okay baby,  manic, but I understand the pain

Yeah cus I feel like your just the fucking one yeah 
The fucking one yeah, who puts a smile on my face
Im sick of fucking feeling like im scared yeah
Like im scared yeah but im not gonna waste this fucking  chance

Cus I never fucking thought id ever be happy yeah
I’d be happy yeah, so what the fuck have you just done to me
Cus you just make me want to be alive yeah,
Just believe yeah, I don't feel like I want to die early

Mental Scars

$LOTHBOI x Rivilin - Mental Scars

Drowning (feat. Teorstan)

Drowning feat. Teorstan

prod. ocin
guitars: 5head

You know my life’s a mess 
I wanna feel your chest 
Come give me one last breath girl 
Keep going til the end 
Remember what I said? 
Do you, do you? 

Find me alone 
Writing songs on my own 
I won’t pick up the phone tonight 
You wanna find my love again 
I don’t know where it went 
But I know it will never fade 

I love the look on your cute face 
When I’m sorry and you hate 
Me for being such a fool 
Still love me until the end girl 
I can’t live here in my head 
It takes control when I’m in bed 
Take my heart and soul instead 
Still love you until the end girl 

Baby I just wanna be enough 
Cause my heart it beats for you, and it will never stop 
I can’t help you baby I’m in a rush 
Insomnia sucks 
ya 

Find me alone 
You know I cannot pick my phone up tonight 
You wanna, wanna find my love again 
Still writing all my songs on my own, alone 
(x2)

alone

Nervous by Dole (feat. Cinoevil) [prod. Khezie Beats]

𝑹𝑰𝑷 𝑬𝑹𝑵𝑰𝑬
create to survive
forevr evolving

https://slothboi.art

$LOTHBOI x Rivilin - Losing It

$LOTHBOI

Recent comments

Logoman e🪬e

nohopenolove

IDLEGLANCE

Nyudoria

Related tracks