ty for 300 <3
prod me & iof
————————
When you had no one to help you
I was always there
And as the lights go black
I think about our past cause
See you weren't there 
When I needed you most
When I was over the edge
Yeah I was down with no hope
I'm thinking bout you always
It was never enough

Sinking deeper
On my own
He's taking you to places
We used to go
I'll think about you
When I'm walking
All alone again

What do you want from me
Why do you watch me bleed
You must love to see me suffer
Cause I was never good to you
You know I'm on to you
When you try to control me with those eyes
I'm breaking down again
You keep tryna get close with all my friends
Oh no this has to end
You caught me by suprise
When I looked into your eyes
I knew that I was

Sinking deeper
On my own
He's taking you to places
We used to go
I'll think about you
When I'm walking
All alone again

no hope

lose it all

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/track/7CxDROAhg92LfJosXnjNje?si=8e3979d4b7c94b56

(grayskies)

I been wasting time
Tryna catch my breath
A feeling so good
It can't get out my head
Memories fly when I'm next to you
Everything aside I was better with you

I keep coughing up lungs
I really wish that I could run
Away from everything
With you

You tryna make me upset
But I was over the edge
I start throwing up
Everytime you're in my head
Thinking memories of everytime
You're in my bed
If i lose it all
Will you even care
You tryna make me upset
But I was over the edge
I start throwing up
Everytime you're in my head
Thinking memories of everytime
You're in my bed
If i lose it all
Will you even care

Our memories are fading away
Is it really good for us to have space
But I keep throwing up throwing up
Our memories wasn't love was it lust
I wish I could try again
Then i'd change everything
I did

You tryna make me upset
But I was over the edge
I start throwing up
Everytime you're in my head
Thinking memories of everytime
You're in my bed
If i lose it all
Will you even care
You tryna make me upset
But I was over the edge
I start throwing up
Everytime you're in my head
Thinking memories of everytime
You're in my bed
If i lose it all
Will you even care

the edge

spotify: https://open.spotify.com/album/0CrYEAk9QAIZwIF0Dc36SU?si=cdd3723e5de143d6

(grayskies)

Weighing out options, Like I'm in a maze
I run into a dead end every step I take
Running away wasn't the best option that I could come up with
But I don't know, I can barely see clear my eyes are filled with smoke
I found out the other day that I loved you the most
Over again everyday it's the same thing
You always had me tied up in your string
I'm too deep in this, There's no coming back
Yeah the choice that I made that night
It decided my future

I'm in disarray my bones are falling apart
It's been a couple of weeks but I'm still finding your heart
I wanna touch the sky, I wanna touch the stars
With you and never go anywhere else
I'm in disarray my bones are falling apart
It's been a couple of weeks but I'm still finding your heart
I wanna touch the sky, I wanna touch the stars
With you and never go anywhere else

Our lives are so exciting
I'm backed against a wall
Your love wasn't so fair
It was one sided to me
But it was so exciting to me
Why did we ever give it up
It wasn't healthy

I'm too deep in this, There's no coming back
Yeah the choice that I made that night
It decided my future

I'm in disarray my bones are falling apart
It's been a couple of weeks but I'm still finding your heart
I wanna touch the sky, I wanna touch the stars
With you and never go anywhere else
I'm in disarray my bones are falling apart
It's been a couple of weeks but I'm still finding your heart
I wanna touch the sky, I wanna touch the stars
With you and never go anywhere else

I tried, To make it work out
Oh I tried yeah I tried yeah I tried again
But it was never enough for you
It wasn't part of the plan for it to end like this
But I'm over, I'm over, I'm over you
I'm in disarray
I left my mind in the hotel room where everything started

disarray

ty for listening <3
prod me
gtr: @chrismarek

the first night
i wouldve never expected this
you pulled me right in 
and showed me this is what heaven is
but its fine
yea its okay
but u dont trust me
dont worry babe i feel the same
ur fucking miles away
no wonder its hard to trust u
just pull me right in
cause i dont wanna waste time for any longer
im in the deep end
its okay cause i know you'll save me in the end

another day
where im drowning again
ive seen too many people walk past
and not even say a word
u fucking know that it hurts
but u continue to torture me
u peel the skin off my fingers
and laugh while everything keeps 
breaking down
and the water is rising
tell me how many times we gone do this
think ive forgotten 
im going to college soon
things happen for a reason
stop saying that you love me 
and just tell me all ur secrets

the first night
i wouldve never expected this
you pulled me right in 
and showed me this is what heaven is
but its fine
yea its okay
but u dont trust me
dont worry babe i feel the same
ur fucking miles away
no wonder its hard to trust u
just pull me right in
cause i dont wanna waste time for any longer
im in the deep end
its okay cause i know ill see u in the end

its been like 2 years
im throwing up just at the sight of u
ur petty lies couldnt hide the truth
yea i know
i always did
but u lied to me and then u plead the 5th
its aching in my brain
my body tenses up
ive done worst shit i cant complain
i think im going
think im going insane
you died at the wrong place
at the wrong time
if only u were here
then i would tell u

ur fucking miles away
no wonder its hard to trust u
just pull me right in
cause i dont wanna waste time for any longer
im in the deep end
its okay cause i know you'll save me in the end
ur fucking miles away
no wonder its hard to trust u
just pull me right in
cause i dont wanna waste time for any longer
im in the deep end
its okay cause i know you'll save me in the end

pull me in

Blues

end things (cf)

tysm for 500 followers <3
(bloom)

Woke up to your text
Why do you wanna end it all
Blood splattered all over my bedroom wall
What did I do to you
For you to act like this
I dropped you off at your house
And left you with a kiss
You got me running round circles in my bedroom
got me thinking how I messed up this bad
It was all my fault again
No matter how hard I try
I find a way to fail

I wasted time
It turns out I'm not over you
I wish I could get close to you
But I messed that up
Seems like you never loved me anyways
Going through our old texts just to numb the pain
It didn't matter to you
I knew it never did

I was missing you
But you were never there
When I was down on my own
You were nowhere to be seen
I see you inside my dreams
Yeah I tried like everything
Just to get you back
I know I messed up bad

(oh oh oh oh oh)

Woke up to your text
Why do you wanna end it all
Blood splattered all over my bedroom wall
What did I do to you
For you to act like this
I dropped you off at your house
And left you with a kiss
You got me running round circles I'm my bedroom
got me thinking how I messed up this bad
It was all my fault again
No matter how hard I try
I find a way to fail

I wasted time
It turns out I'm not over you
I wish I could get close to you
But I messed that up
Seems like you never loved me anyways
Going through our old texts just to numb the pain
It didn't matter to you
I knew it never did

why

kenny's journal