When Santa's arrival seems a bit more ominous than usual.

Santa's Coming (you better watch out)

Santa's B

You're A Mean One Beelzebub

Gen Z Disco Elysium Intro

ugh, don't listen to this.


damn motherfuckers it’s christmas in america
c’mon motherfuckers it’s christmas in america
gonna eat some pussy and do a line of blow
hey you sonsofbitches, it’s christmas don’t you know

It's every dumb-ass retard’s fav'rite holiday
Head out to the strip club, gonna get some play
Six jiggers of well whiskey and a sweaty stack of ones
Gonna get a stripper to rub against my gun

Pair of juicy knockers struts out on the stage
The bounce of them is perfect, she must be underage
slip a dollar in her thong and say "I wanna smell yer poon"
She winks and leads me by the hand into the champagne room

hey you stupid’ cunts, it’s christmas in america
deck the halls you cocksucker, christmas in america
gonna eat some pussy and do a line of blow
hey you sonsofbitches, it’s christmas don’t you know

I wanna suck those titties, I start playin’ pocket pool
She rubs her little clitty and grinds against my tool
I tell her to bend over as her cooter strokes my junk
I wanna snort a line of coke right off her fuckin' trunk

the jack is fire in my veins my dick’s so fuckin’ hard
after work I’ll eat you out, come meet me by your car
she kneads the boulder in my pants I’m about to nut
I squeeze her ass with both my hands the bouncer throws me out

Round up all the ragheads it’s christmas in america
Fa la la you fudge packer, christmas in america
gonna eat some pussy and do a line of blow
hey you sonsofbitches, it’s christmas don’t you know


At Christmas time, baby Jesus wants me to get skanks
each winter night I’m trolling clubs just to get a yank

tongue deep in a camel toe, inhaling funk of cooch
bumps of pure columbian, chuggin’ shots of hooch

She’s chokin’ on my hard-on , chokin’ on my load
Chokin’ cause I got my grip around her fuckin’ throat 

I never wear a rubber cause raincoats are for johns
and I never ever rim ‘em cause that how homos get it on


jingle bells are ringin’, her pickup smells like pine
her panties down around her feet, the stickshift in my groin
it’s a holly jolly yuletide, my rug munch itch is scratched
I bury my whole face in some creamy sticky snatch

A couple snorts of snow and I'm gonna live forever
My bike is screaming down the highway riding hell for leather
My whole head is on fire, burnin' with white pony
Tomorrow I'll get my fuckin' ex her fuckin' alimony 

Fuck you greasy faggots it’s christmas in america
Santa's sleigh is burning bright, christmas in america
Rudy pulls the pack with a devil’s hellish glow
hey you sonsofbitches, it’s christmas ho ho ho

So listen up you shitstains it’s christmas in america
if you want some Christmas cheer this year in america
get old saint nick some skin mags, an eight ball and a beer
leave ‘em by the goddamn tree for christmas time this year

damn motherfuckers it’s christmas in america again

Christmas In America

Oy vey… Because of a little oil we make such a big holiday?let’s get this mishegas over with. my corns are killing me

eyns tsvey dray
eyns tsvey dray

this is ok, but my voice. it’s not what it used to be. and so much of the counting. can we get some tambourine in here to keep the time.

nisht shlekht

bubbeleh, I don’t mean to kvetch, but this piano. it’s bupkes. give me something a mer yiddisher

such a klogmuter I am, but this key is shreklekh. Can we get music into something minor. Major keys… di tsouris

ah, yes. that’s the solemn gloom and suffering i remember from when I was a little mamzerook

it’s that time of year when the goyim turn out
schmoozing and shikkered and futzing about

They’ll have their christmas but we’ll have much better
Shavuot and Purim all rolled together

Go take your bubbeh out on the town
God’s chosen people will go boogie down

There’s sufganiyot, latkes and schnapps
drink till you’re schnockered, eat till you plotz

the footwork is schlocky
The music is schmaltz
get out and dance the hanukkah waltz

go take your chutzpah out on the streets
try to nosh kosher, though bacon’s a treat

your boychik wants presents like tchotchkes and such
buy something kitschy but don’t pay too much

dance with a shiksa show her some charm
keep time with the numbers tattooed on your arm

let’s all cut a rug what with twisting and bending 
it’s almost as fun as the holocaust ending

Go shake your tuches
and shout mazel tov
shlep to the floor for the hanukkah waltz

feh, that was as enjoyable as a second bris

Goon Christmas 2017

Chanukah Waltz

Black Lodge Bells

Santa was here
He was at your door
And nobody seemed to be home

You'll find in your mail
Delivery has failed
Your parcel was near but gone

Weren't you home
Or just on the john
Or is it that he didn't care

Three christmas cheers
The notice is here
Your parcel was near but gone


Warehouse
Neighbour
Who knows now
Where your
Toys are
Near but gone

An angry review
Is all you can do
Conditions won't ever improve

Until Santa tries
To unionize
And we guillotine the rich
And we guillotine the rich

Near but Gone

The First Noel

Crazy Uncle Bobby

Traditional German Christmas Industrial Metal Music.
Thanks to Gatac for help with the lyrics.

WEIHNACHTSMANNLIED

Wir warten auf den Weihnachtsmann ("We are waiting for Father Christmas")
Geschenke bringt er uns sodann ("He will bring us presents then")
Das Schicksal aller tief im Sack ("Everyone's fate deep in the sack")
Der Krampus mag euren Geschmack ("The Krampus likes your taste")

Weihnachtsmann, Weihnachtsmann ("Father Christmas, Father Christmas")
schwebt am Himmel bald ("Already floats in the sky")
Alle Menschheit richtet er ("All of humanity he judges")
Sein Lachen ist so kalt! ("His laughter is so cold")

Wir klettern auf den Tannenbaum ("We climb the fir tree")
Dort wartet der Lebkuchenraum ("That's where the gingerbread room awaits")
Geschenke regnen wir hinunter ("Presents we will let rain down")
Schaut, wie schön! Der Schnee wird bunter! ("Look, how pretty! The snow becomes more colorful!")

Weihnachtsmann, Weihnachtsmann ("Father Christmas, Father Christmas")
schwebt am Himmel bald ("Already floats in the sky")
Alle Menschheit richtet er ("All of humanity he judges")
Sein Lachen ist so kalt! ("His laughter is so cold")

Weihnacht! Weihnacht! ... ("Christmas! Christmas! ...")

Geschenke! Geschenke! Geschenke! ("Presents! Presents! Presents!")
Ho Ho Ho! Geschenke! ("Ho Ho Ho! Presents!")

Gen Z Disco Elysium Intro

Paladinus