lyrics vvv

i never learned to be sad
i learn on my own
i never learned to leave home
i learned to go on
and now my chest just burns
and i cannot learn
im uncomfortable 
and nothing will change that
im just tryna be healthy
but i cannot learn
from anything that i see
anything will change in a matter of seconds
your whole life will go away if you let it
and your damn brain will fucking hurt if you let it
oh..
meet me in michigan..
its all over summer
its all over my heart
all over winter
and every month we already lost

i never learned to be sad
i learn on my own
i never learned to leave home
i learned to go on
and now my chest just burns
and i cannot learn
im uncomfortable 
and nothing will change that
im just tryna be healthy
but i cannot learn
from anything that i see
anything will change in a matter of seconds
your whole life will go away if you let it
and your damn brain will fucking hurt if you let it
oh..
meet me in michigan..
its all over summer
its all over my heart
all over winter
and every month we already lost

michigan (splashgvng)

my ac is broke and im dying.
lyrics vvv

can you take me back to
last summer, when i didnt give a fuck
eviscerated at the seams i cant breathe
i think my sins
are catching up to me
can you take me back to
last summer, when i didnt give a fuck
eviscerated at the seams i cant breathe
i think my sins
are catching up to me
can you take me back to
last summer, when i didnt give a fuck
eviscerated at the seams i cant breathe
i think my sins
are catching up to me

i just
want to
experience something different
and i just
want to
have a life
i just
want to
experience something different
and i just
want to
have a life

got a tooth ache
but i wont fix it today
ill just sit around and procrastinate
wait for it to get better on its own
no i dont wanna
i dont wanna face my fears today
its too damn hard to live like this
yeah its too damn hard
yeah its too damn hard
yeah its too damn hard
yeah its too damn hard
yeah..

can you take me back to
last summer, when i didnt give a fuck
eviscerated at the seams i cant breathe
i think my sins
are catching up to me

i just
want to
experience something different
and i just
want to
have a life
i just
want to
experience something different
and i just
want to
have a life
and it hurts so bad..
experience something different
and i just
want to
have a life

i just
want to
experience something different
and i just
want to
have a life
and it hurts so bad..

eviscerated (grayskies)

last single off new EP out 11/5!!

featuring the great @decksmusic

produced by @livingpuffy

lyrics:
i’m not stupid 
i can feel it setting in
i’m just paralyzed 
while i’m staring at the edge 
and on one hand i still think it might begin 
but this afterglow is still wearing thin 

and this all ain’t 
how it used to be 
and i’m wondering
what it meant to me 
take my hand and i’ll meet you at the end 
but before you go give me one more glance

(decks)
i just wanna see the end of the tunnel
life sucks when u live in a bubble
i just really gotta get it straight
pass time in a somber state
when the walls are closing in
i need to breathe before i swim
pretend that the times are good again
in the same ways
yeah, and when i finally take a stand
hope that they’ll see me as a friend
or maybe someone instead
of nothing

one more glance (feat. decks)[prod. living puff]

prod @jolst + @sprr00w
lyrics:
called ur phone last night didnt pick up
and im not surprised but i miss us
so much didnt think it would hit hard
but it did now i think i got withdrawals from u
clueless to what im gonna do
think i need to find sumn new
always fucking crawling back to u
and i cant stand it
my heart took some damage
know its getting better but i still can feel the panic
heal the wound. bandage
still feels like u planned this
wait
didnt think that u would vanish
out my life
and what u told me ill never forget
constant reminders of u in my head
but it all got better the day that u left
never mind
ill be fine
and what u told me ill never forget
constant reminders of u in my head
but it all got better the day that u left
never mind
ill be fine

nevermind (prod jolst + sp00)

just the beginning...
@jolst // @pekarot_161 // art by @ejcarrmusic

lyrics:

i can tell u wanna hang it up
with the way u never say u love me
and i never even needed ya
maybe it was just the way u bugged me

i’ve been bothered by the time i’ve wasted lately
fallen through, my saving grace
it was the one thing that kept me in place
rather forget than forgive

cuz i’ve been kind
i’ve given patience u dont deserve
i’ve followed trails to the core of this earth
i’m reading books cuz i never fucking learn
you’ve run a fine line too long this time
i gotta move on im sure im right
cuz it was nice with u here
i’ll be fine with u gone
i don’t like all this fear
you should just move along

i can tell u wanna hang it up
with the way u never say u love me
and i never even needed ya
maybe it was just the way u bugged me

time, wasting time 
but you don’t realize 
what you don’t realize 
these are the days of our lives
you got caught up in your lies 
emotions trapped inside your minds 
hidden behind a disguise
now its too late for goodbyes

i can tell u wanna hang it up
with the way u never say u love me
and i never even needed ya
maybe it was just the way u bugged me

i’ve been bothered by the time i’ve wasted lately
fallen through, my saving grace
it was the one thing that kept me in place
rather forget than forgive..

hangitup [jolst x pekarot]

spotify & apple music!

i know i cant stay here ft. shiki xo *cxld blxxd*

lyrics:

and you told me
things would be different in the long run
i'm stuck here waiting for the changes
i can't believe your eyes were fixed on no one
and you showed me
life will feel different when it's no fun
i'm stuck here facing all the changes
i can't believe our eyes are on the same sun

we were carefree
then you wanted to go
and the lesson learned
is how it hurts to know
i was carefree
then i wanted to go
and the lesson i learned
is how it hurts to know 

(chorus)

same sun

@hoeplessboy <3 
@jolst <3
lyrics:
i tried to figure it out
while night falls
im bleeding out on the floor
close the door
what more could u want?
no, i don't wanna talk
anymore 
(excerpt from lovespelledbackwards - i've became everything i hate)

hoepless:
anymore
closer to you
i'll be fine
(anymore)
calm down
i need u here with me now
fall out
no, i don't need any1 else :)

i tried to figure it out
while night falls
im bleeding out on the floor
close
the
door
what more could u want?
no, i don't wanna talk
anymore

i guess we'll play like that
damn, all night ur sitting down
and 
i'm falling right back down
girl
you're crying out so loud
i guess
i'll stay with all my doubts

i tried to figure it out
while night falls
im bleeding out on the floor
close
the
door
what more could u want?
no, i don't wanna talk
anymore..! x2

SPOTIFY

while night falls w/ hoepless (prod. jolst)

recorded & mixed by me
produced by back2thapast

So I'm like yeah yeah yeah oh oh oh
This the start of something new
Every time I'm in a room with you I get a bad mood
Oh pardon me sorry dude I don't really wanna talk no
I don't really wanna talk
I don't really wanna talk no
I don't really wanna talk

So can you tell me what you mean
Nothing here is meant for me I'm nothing like I'm supposed to be
I hope that its all a dream
But its always a nightmare lately I been so scared I don't know
So I pick up right back where I started
Lately I don't want no friends and to my friends I'm so cold hearted
I cant wait till all this ends
Tell my momma that I'm sorry
I ain't as strong as I thought I was but I'm still working hard for us
Yeah and I been fighting for so long
I just wish this shit was simple what the fuck am I doing wrong
For my whole life I thought it was destiny
Now I don't think its meant for me
I'm tearing by the seams and honestly I wanna rest in peace
I cry each time I'm on a beat
Toss and turning in my sleep
Wake up sweating on my sheets cause I keep running from the truth
I just wanna be with you but you don't wanna be with me
Ill say ill agree with you if you say you agree with me
Oh yeah
Yeah
Ill say ill agree with you if you say you agree with me
Oh yeah
Ill say ill agree with you if you say you agree with me

growing pains

spotify

growing pains [p. back2thapast]

welp, too bad!
spotify soon!

prod. @irby314

lyrics:
its too bad i need cover
i leave track, relapse and recover
i see you moved past, i still gotta
with self doubt i cant sprout, i need others
yea i could use that to leap forward
cuz everything i wanna try just leaves me cornered
i see the moon set in midsummer
thats useless blue text in green covers
its really too bad

how long do i have to play pretend still?
all of the nights where i tried but nothing works for me
i cant get a hold of different angles
narrow my sight til it matches my uncertainty

and i keep hurting me with sabotaging myself
cant let it burden me, its just another farewell
rip out my circuitry and coat my heart in pastels
fool me internally until its part of my shell

yea its cool i get it, im used to adapting by now
but these tools do not help cuz i found

its too bad i need cover
i leave track, relapse and recover
i see you moved past, i still gotta
with self doubt i cant sprout, i need others
yea i could use that to leap forward
cuz everything i wanna try just leaves me cornered
i see the moon set in midsummer
thats useless blue text in green covers

its really too bad i need cover
i leave track, relapse and recover
i see you moved past, i still gotta
with self doubt i cant sprout, i need others
yea i could use that to leap forward
cuz everything i wanna try just leaves me cornered
i see the moon set midsummer
thats useless blue text in green covers

blue text, green covers | prod. irby

Yeah
Ugh
How the hell do I tell what's right from wrong
It always seems like everyone got it put together oh
I don't think I care enough to get on
At this point I hate making every song
Honestly it don't bring me peace anymore
I reminisce when I was sleeping on the floor with my dad
Wanted everything it never mattered what I couldn't have
Now my vision distorted and I been heading down the wrong path
I was supposed to learn from my mistakes now I might crash
Why the fuck do I keep breaking down
I think I really fucking hate me now
I'm closer to the end
Can anybody somebody just hear me out
No who
Don't ask me how I'm doing
When everything gets rough I'm holding on
I aint really that tough I aint really that strong
Its my fucking life I ruined
I don't wanna get into it oh
Lately I'm the clown or I'm the pawn everyday I'm feeling stupid oh

I give advice to everyone but never take my own
I got problems on problems I guess you can say I'm grown
And I wonder how they'll feel when I'm dead and I'm gone
Tell my mom plant a tree when its time
I don't wanna tombstone
I don't want nobody crying
I don't wanna do wrong
I just wanna make it right
I sit at this laptop
Complaining about my spot
But I know that there's others that don't got it like I got
Used to put it on my mother one day I would pop
If you ask me now Ill tell you ima stop
Its not the same as before
Cause I don't want it like I did anymore
I don't see the point tell me what its for
I cant go one day being sober
This my dream and I think its over
Oh its over

nevermind (prod jolst + sp00)

starsbeforesunrise

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