I had mysterious medical symptoms so I made a doctor’s appointment in search of an answer 
And that led to other appointments being x-rayed, poked and prodded, MRI’d 
I received a diagnosis that was hard to hear, a later stage cancer 
I asked the doctor for instructions, “Im new to this doc, its the first time that I’ve died”. 

He’s said, “there’s really nothing to it, its been done many times its almost boring   
You just go on with your life and do the things that you enjoy until you drop.” 
“But I don’t want to die yet doc”, I found myself pathetically imploring.  
“Is there something we could do to buy some time or even or make the cancer stop”?  

Edmund Hillary climbed Everest before anybody did 
Thomas Edison, Jim Morrison and Billy the Kid 
They’re all dead, they’re all dead, they’re all dead

Suleiman the magnificent, who ruled the Ottoman Empire 
Mohammad, Jesus, Buddha and the great Richard Pryor 
They’re all dead, they’re all dead, they’re all dead.  

“Chemotherapy is often used to kill the cancer cells”, the doctor told me 
“But as I’m sure you’ve heard it also kills the normal cells a person needs to thrive. 
 Radiation kills the cancer cells with beams” but then he stated rather coldly 
“For a late stage cancer such as yours, in 5 years, 2 or 3 percent survive” 

“And of course, somebody has to pay for science, these therapies are both expensive
You’ve got insurance but it won’t cover all the costs, your wife and kids will likely pay”
I said, “I appreciate your candor, doc but you’ve left me feeling very apprehensive”. 
He said, “I’m sorry, I’m just your doctor and I wish it didn’t have to be this way”.

Every soldier who enlisted in the first world war 
Thomas Jefferson, George Washington and Zsa Zsa Gabor 
They’re all dead they’re all dead they’re all dead 

Neil Armstrong did the moon walk before Micheal JackSON 
All of the heroes of the Bible and Atilla the Hun 
They’re all dead, they’re all dead, they’re all dead

I said, “doc before I leave here is there anything that you could say to give me. 
Just a little bit of hope before I have to give this news to my kids and my wife?  
Hell, my mother’s almost 90, I can’t believe that she is going to outlive me. 
What did they train you to say to a patient who has come to the end of his life’? 

He said, “I’ve got an 10 year old patient with a tumor in his brain the size of a baseball  
He’s in unbearable pain and between you and me, I don’t think he’ll survive.” 
I knew what he was trying to tell me and in shame I could feel my ungrateful face fall 
Toward my sneakers and in that moment I felt happy that I was ever alive 


All the starving kids in Africa and those with a similar fate 
Sammy davis junior, Alexander the great 
They’re all dead they’re all dead they’re all dead

Leonardo Da Vinci who painted the Mona Lisa 
Albert Einstein, Queen Elizabeth and Mother Teresa 
They’re all dead they’re all dead they’re all dead

Sally Ride who was a member of the doomed space shuttle crew 
Your mom, your dad, your doggie and eventually YOU 
We’re all dead, we’re all dead, we’re all dead!

We're All Dead.

I write story songs.   Many of the stories are true.

Watch my videos!  YouTube:   https://youtube.com/@turtlefrogman?feature=shared

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New tracks tagged ##death #dead #comedy #cancer #doctor #woodyallen