* sT-t-74RZY !!!!
* Γthey⅃ S41D Y0U WOULDN'7 5H0W, 8U7 1 S7ILL H4D H0P3 !!!!
* H0w'V3 YOU B3EN !?!?
* or rather,
* H4VE YOU 8EEN ?
* B33N, TH1NKIN6 4B0UT OUR L177LE Γscandal⅃, TH47 15 ?
* 1 Kn0W I H4V3 !!!!!
* I W4S TH1NK1NG W3 C0ULD 5EW OUR 0WN M47€H1NG,
* HAHA
* HAHA
* J4€KETTS?
* 
* yeah you're right screw the ΓApparel⅃
* we're gonna need to ΓLie⅃ as ΓLOW⅃ as possible if we wanna Γstomp⅃ this Γgoomba⅃...
* here's the dΓcontract⅃.
* i'm sure you've heard of the 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻'𝘀 𝗖𝗮𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗼 by now, right?
* ahhh, the Queen...
* back in my Γlife⅃, i used to live aΓTop⅃ her ΓDesk⅃ of honor...
* back when i was the ΓLite⅃ of the Γthe party!⅃ !!!!
* back when we were the ΓForever⅃est of Γfriend⅃s !!
* bB-84CK WH3N 5H3
* WH3N 5H3
* ...when, she..
* 
[pull string recoils]
* 8UT L0OK 47 M3 NOW !!!!!
* living next to a ΓSpiral⅃ of Γfilth⅃...
* but that's ΓB-Side⅃s the point.
* while i was ΓLivin' the dream.⅃ up in her ΓCASTLE⅃ of Γbeauty⅃, i learned a few things...
* deep, within the ΓHeart⅃ of the building, at the very Γbottom⅃ floor... you'll find the ΓSafe House⅃
* that my ΓBuddy!⅃, is where they hold the ΓSecrets in the Shallows & Sky⅃...
* but more Γⓘ Important!⅃ly, that's where ΓIT⅃ is kept..........
* you see...
* that ΓDark, Dark⅃ safe is kept in a Γdark⅃, ΓDark⅃ room...
* and in that dark, ΓDARK⅃ safe, you'll find a d-Dd4RK, D4RK CH35T...
* and in that ΓDARK, DARK⅃ chest, you'll find a D4RK, Γdark⅃ box...
* and in that dark, ΓDARK !!!!⅃ box you'll find...
* D035N'7 M4T73R !!!!!!!!
* JU57 BR1NG iT 70 ME !!!
* once you have it, all you gotta do is pop this ΓJ4€K1TT⅃ in that soundproof Γuh... BOX-⅃ and bring me back to the 𝘀𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝗽𝗹𝗮𝗰𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗴𝗼𝘁 𝗶𝘁 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺!
* after that, w-WwW3'LL PR4CT1CALLY B3 H1TTING TH3
* HIT71N6 TH3
* 
* !!!!!!!!!!!
* 15N'T 1T 3XC1TING !?
* i can already taste ΓIT⅃......
* that ΓCool, Cool⅃ flavor of ΓYum!⅃
* let me Γgift⅃ you a little ΓSTAR POWER⅃ to get you past that blasted ΓBlock⅃ade !
* you're gonna need it if you want any ΓCHANCE TIME!⅃ of getting into that ΓDark, Dark⅃ Room
[ ΓSTAR POWER⅃ was added to your inventory. ]
* oh yeah,, and ΓOne more thing!⅃
* you have to go
* 4L0N3.
* i can't come, my crummy ΓTalk⅃box is too ΓLOUD!⅃ and full of ΓcccrrrcCCRRRRzzzCCCRRRRzzzcccrrrrzz⅃
* and ΓNOBODY.⅃ else is allowed to even know about this, let alone come with Γyou.⅃
* that'd only put us at ΓHigher!⅃ risk of getting Γja⅃caught
* now that we've got that all ΓClear⅃ed up,,
* WH4T'RE Y0U WA1TING FOR !?
* THR0W M3 A ΓPass⅃ 4ND ΓGet Outta Here!⅃, F457 !!!!!!!
* W3'VE G0T Γplenty⅃ T1M3 TO W45TE !!!!!!!!!!!
* R3MEMB3R, BR1NG M3 B4€K S0METH1NG ΓFrench⅃ !!!!!!!!
=============================================
big thanks to https://soundcloud.com/bluen3bula for helping me decide on a motif here, and for just generally concepting a lot of the au stuff with me
awesomer dialogue B3
and thank you @nexus_11fuckingthree for the cloud wallpaper idea !!
we are almost jacportin...

Γ4/8⅃ BUY iN !!

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