made this just to try jumpstyle kicks 
but damn.... yukari 💥💌

終末 -- なあえわ feat. Yuzuki Yukari

Check out the full lyrics here: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1en3gQNuzw3iUk1Tm9J2b1Mi0KVDJ7acuAzS3yPa2zts/edit?usp=sharing

The song "Grave of Lies" is a visceral exploration of existential despair, addiction, and the hollow aftermath of love and fame. It paints a raw, unflinching portrait of a soul trapped in cycles of self-destruction, using vivid metaphors to convey the weight of emotional decay. At its core, the narrative follows a protagonist grappling with the consequences of chasing fleeting highs—whether through substances, toxic relationships, or the illusions of success—only to find themselves buried deeper in isolation and regret. Themes of addiction permeate the track, symbolizing not just substance abuse but a broader dependency on escapism. The act of "chasing the dragon" becomes a metaphor for pursuing numbness, a futile attempt to outrun pain. Substances like pills, edibles, and smoke are depicted as temporary salves that morph into shackles, amplifying the void they aim to fill. This cyclical struggle mirrors the human condition of seeking relief in distractions, only to confront the emptiness they leave behind. Love, in the song, is portrayed as a destructive force—a con game or a loaded gun. Relationships are built on lies and betrayal, leaving the protagonist with a heart likened to a "ghost town" or a prison with discarded keys. The emotional scars of broken trust and hollow intimacy fester, becoming as intoxicating and damaging as the substances consumed. The recurring motif of "graves" and "digging" underscores self-sabotage, suggesting the protagonist is both the architect and victim of their own undoing, burying themselves in deceit and regret. Fame and success are framed as gilded cages, where material wealth and external validation fail to mask inner poverty. The protagonist’s rise from "rags to riches" becomes a tragic irony, as the crown of achievement feels counterfeit, amplifying feelings of alienation. The spotlight exposes the fragility of identity, reducing the self to a performance—a "hollow stunt" masking profound vulnerability. Existential dread looms large, with the abyss serving as a mirror to the protagonist’s psyche. Voices of doubt and nihilism taunt from the shadows, framing life as a rigged game where hope is a myth. The imagery of voids, ghosts, and eternal climbs reflects a struggle to find meaning in a world that feels indifferent. Even pain becomes a twisted companion, a "throne" from which the protagonist rules their own ruin, suggesting a perverse comfort in suffering as the only authentic emotion left. Ultimately, the song is a lament for a soul adrift in modernity’s chaos, where connection is elusive, and survival hinges on numbing the senses. It critiques the allure of escapism while acknowledging its inevitability in a fractured world. The "grave of lies" is both a personal hell and a universal metaphor—a testament to the human tendency to self-destruct when confronted with truths too heavy to bear. The protagonist’s journey is one of tragic awareness: they see the chains but remain bound, a ghost in their own life, screaming into a void that echoes back only silence.

Grave of Lies

[Lyrics]

「頑張れ」なんて言葉、
死んだ人の代弁？
生きてるだけで地獄なのに、
お前になにがわかる？

笑顔の裏に隠した、痛みは深すぎて
空っぽな胸の穴は、今日も黙って塞いでる。

いつか限界が来ると
わかってたのに、お前たちは
「元気そうだから大丈夫」
表面だけしか見ないんだ…

限界、限界、もう無理だ。
悲しみは永遠、叫んでも誰にも届かない。
笑ってるフリも、もう苦しい。
誰も本気で見ないから。

限界、限界、これが現実。
「助けて」って声を殺した日
気づいてほしかっただけなのに
NO HELP,  NO CARE、ただそれだけ…


私の葬式で語られる、無意味な“理解”
「回復したように見えた」って
見てたのは、いつわりの仮面だけ

連絡も絶たれていく
それが普通だって？
心の中の嵐に、誰一人触れなかった…


元気になって、「時間が癒す」
その言葉が一番痛い。
理解されないままの傷は
ただ静かに命を削っていく…

限界、限界、もう戻れない
怒りも悲しみも麻痺していく
救いを求めたわけじゃない
ただ、わかって欲しかった。

限界、限界、これで最後
“わかってた”なんて言わないで
生きろって押し付けたお前らに
NO HELP,   NO CARE　さようなら。

My Grief and Despair

誰も手を差し伸べなかったくせに

featuring edeF., Holly Herndon, Björk, Nick Land, Muslimgauze, C418, Screamadelica, Vanessa Amara, Bassvictim, Headache, David Holmes, Nardwuar, Andy Weatherall, Spinvis, Charles Mingus, Deadmau5, Ekkehard Ehlers, La Düsseldorf, Swans, Aphex Twin, God, Ever ascending tones, Bladee and many more~

chaoticrhizomatic's 3rd digital djmix-whiplash/revelation inducing hyperstitional beats 4 doom/bloom

My debut EP on Manuka Records is OUT NOW 
Substance - Despair 

Despair [Manuka Records]

[Lyrics]

I lost the only soul who truly knew me.
Now I walk alone in the noise, unseen.
People carve my grief wide open,
But never once stand beside me.

You sprinkle salt in wounds,
For your own relief, not mine.
No care, no weight, no regret—
Just a craving to feel kind.
You just want to say:
"I tried."


So we deceive you.
We show you masks, not truth.
We cry and scream beneath the smile—
Loading bullets, tying ropes,
Crushing castor seeds in silence...
Waiting for the day to come.


"He seemed okay, got better too."
"It must be thanks to my advice!"
How dare you speak with such smug ease?
Your words, like blades, reopen me.

We can’t forget our pain.
We can’t escape with lies.
We spiral inward, trapped in grief,
Lost in a maze that echoes thoughts.
Heaven? Afterlife?
Your comfort is just noise to us.


So we deceive you.
Our truth is never shown.
We scream alone beneath the smile—
Preparing needles, live wires,
Grinding deadly seeds at dusk...
Waiting for the day to come.


Empathy is just a mask for shallow pity.
My grief was never yours to taste.
How dare you touch the surface,
Pretend you’ve seen the storm inside?

“Oh, you’re just too much to handle!”
That’s all you’ll ever say, right?
You don’t want to save me—
You want the catharsis of doing so.


So we deceive you.
We play your game, not ours.
We smile, but scream through broken teeth—
With rope around the neck,
Gun kissed to the lips,
And poison burning down our throat.
Goodbye.

The Grief That Never Found a Cure

Good Friday - The Revd Canon Bob Leopold

The Streets Have Found

I want to Run away

no place to call home (alteg)

i love yuzuki yukari and i'm posting songs with her new v6 voicebank
you might find me as えいこ89.0, but now i go as なあえわ(naaewa)
here is some useless info:
im a girl
14 almost 15
absolutely no music knowledge
i own like every popular vocaloid but i dont really use them lmao
i use fl studio and sometimes garageband
for vocals v6 and v4 (why the hell cant i use my v4s on v6??!!) 
i have an unbelievable song making speed but the ideas take years to come
pjsk player and enjoyer (i dont wanna hear anything about sekai covers)
thats all lmao



omw to get into prosekaultimate 4

All songs are released into the public domain. 
Please feel free to download them.
No need to credit me, and you're even free to sell it if you like.
Hmm, but if you like it, I would love for you to help infected&spread my lyrics!
Link Free.  feel free to expose it anywhere you like.

I am a bacterium with mycolic acid on its surface.
I will damage your lungs.
And..... Smash commercialism.

✨Weird music from fox✨

my bio: https://spacehey.com/foxtail

my Telegramm channel(RU): https://t.me/+EvijsQqvifEyMjI6

https://linktr.ee/substanceofficial
BOOKING: taryn@triplea.agency
TUNES/CONTACT: substancedubs@gmail.com

Gunfingaz Thursdays
twitch.tv/substance_420

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for inquiries: lucieffectfr@gmail.com
instagram: @lucieffect

I like to make music and help my fellow artists! I encourage you to check out those I'm following as well!

New tracks tagged #Despair