“nissan altima” ~ lyrics

one, two, three, four
bad bitches are at my door
five, six, seven, eight
all of them have hella cake

and your plug drives a nissan altima
he's pushing pills like a granny
i can't fuck with ya
i'm in the backseat of a maybach
bouncing it up

spent 10k on a bad bitch
ima buy out the mall
she only knew a few designers
now she's wearin em all
must be lonzo or lamelo
cuz you know that i ball

you might've put her on your story
but im who she calls
i put her up in my penthouse
now im calling her doll
man the higher you climb
the harder you fall

i was creeping through the woods
with my mask on
i hate the mornings man
i feel like im maxon
hydroplane through the roads
need more traction

and every force
has an equal reaction
and everyone
follows their own attractions
and you can never
control other peoples actions
and nothing is objective
with all the abstraction

got some shoes he can't afford
and now he hates me
grew up on the same block
he said he made me
so i made his main bitch
take my baby
bieber treatment from your girl
call you maybe

you need a scale
when you're counting this much money
those clothes from marshalls
have you looking so funny

one, two, three, four
bad bitches are at my door
five, six, seven, eight
all of them have hella cake

and your plug drives a nissan altima
he's pushing pills like a granny
i can't fuck with ya
i'm in the backseat of a maybach
bouncing it up

nissan altima

Is a fake boyfriend really just for Christmas? 

 One fake romance. One magical Christmas. One chance to fall in love. 

Laura was all set for a quiet solo Christmas – just her, a bottle of wine, and flat-sitting for a stranger. But when the stranger’s parents mistake her for his mystery girlfriend, she’s swept off to the snowy Scottish Highlands with Callum and his whole family.

Between the cosy sleeper train, charming pubs and breathtaking views, this could be the no-strings-attached Christmas of Laura’s dreams.

But stranger Callum is hot, hilarious and their ‘fake’ chemistry is off the charts.

So is this just a Christmas fling? Or the start of something more?

'Pure holiday magic, it's not Christmas without Kelk' Julie Soto

'A absolute knockout, full of belly laughs and sizzling chemistry. CHRISTMAS FLING is insanely addictive and delivers on every level – her best yet!' Rosie Walsh

'When it comes to fabulously funny romcoms, Lindsey Kelk is the gift that keeps on giving! A festive treat of a book, I loved it!' Alexandra Potter

'The perfect book this holiday season' Kate Goldbeck

'Her absolute best – rip roaringly funny, taking us on an adventure with a bonus dose of holiday magic' Ali Rosen

'Hilarious, heart-warming and addictive' Woman & Home

'Funny and heart-warming' Woman's Weekly

'Lindsey Kelk weaves a festive romcom that's both heartwarming and hilarious' Woman's Own

Christmas Fling, By Lindsey Kelk, Read by Heather Long

DNN jungle mosh- anypath records psypathwork

BITCHES IS FAKdE GET IT THROUGH YOUR HEAD DUMMY

Pour tous ceux qui savent ce qu'est vraiment Paris ! ou qui ne le savent pas encore mais ne vont pas tarder à le découvrir.

Welcome to Paris

Was It All A Lie

To move one must endure and process the darkness, allowing it to be washed away through reflection, purification, and forgiveness to achieve a state of clarity and a new dawn of understanding. 

a bad dream

A story designed to be synchronised with the 2012 motion picture, "Skyfall".

SYNC POINT = EXACTLY SIX MINUTES

Written by Ross Sutherland
Performed / Produced by Ross Sutherland for the podcast Imaginary Advice

Music:
Heavenly Beauty by AudioPanda (license #42553683184)
Inspiring Innovation by AGMusic (license #49124778367)
Yoga and Zen by I'mihsandincer (license #26413545729)
You Need to Go by Goldie Shine (license #33462929196)
Additional music by Jeremy Warmsley

Support the podcast:
www.patreon.com/rossgsutherland
www.buymeacoffee.com/imaginaryadvice

Skyfall Part One

Not How To Sell Duds prod. MoriToMiserY

The Void (ARG)

an extension of suciogami unto 6petals;

torment or tease (someone) with the sight or promise of something that is unobtainable.

Christ Is King
Jordan James Greydanus Official Music
blxsphmer Hell's Rebellion TripP!3 YellOW! Voidrock Voidrockrap
"super Midget(o)" "Jorjin/Jahjah" itsasupermidget itsamemidgeto

Instagram Ziggybenneti 
Youtube Chi Major

Publishers of award-winning fiction and non-fiction audiobooks for adults and children. Listen to exclusive clips from our books and free audioook extracts here on Soundcloud.

1985Purple in dark space
empty care, return space source(s)
ini/whois inspires me

Experiments in audio fiction | Anthology series by Ross Sutherland

Tribeca Independent Fiction Award 2025 (for “They Will / They Won’t”)

British Podcast Award Winner: Best Fiction Series

“Few people are as skilled at turning moments of regret into transcendent, artistic works (…) One of podcasting’s brightest lights” —AV Club

“As close as you can get to an audible psychedelic trip” —Stylist

“Sutherland’s laboratory for various experiments in audio fiction, full of strange excursions and sublime turns of phrases” —Vulture, Ten Essential Fiction Podcasts that Shaped the Genre

New tracks tagged #FAke