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[Verse 1]
She showed up late in a neon kayak
Said, “My ex took the truck, so I’m paddlin’ back”
Had a mullet wig and a snakeskin vest
Pulled out a churro and said, “This is my best.”
We hit the road in my grandpa’s van
Got a baby goat and a karaoke plan
Rolled up slow to the county fair
Blasting polka remixes like we just don’t care

[Chorus]
Bottoms up on a Tuesday night
With a kiddie pool full of Miller Lite
Got a boom box taped to a scarecrow’s arm
And a petting zoo set off the fire alarm
She’s twerkin’ in boots on a lawn chair throne
With a raccoon wearin’ my cologne
Ain’t classy, but it sure feels right—
Just a tractor tappin’ love song kinda night

[Verse 2]
She said, “You ever slow danced in a pigpen?”
I said, “Only twice—but I’d do it again.”
She stole the crown from the corn dog queen
While I air-fried bacon on a trampoline
The sheriff came, but he joined the jam
Did the worm in boots and broke his ham
Somebody's grandma brought apple pie
Spiked with something that made a goat cry

[Chorus]
Bottoms up on a Tuesday night
With a kiddie pool full of Miller Lite
Got a boom box taped to a scarecrow’s arm
And a petting zoo set off the fire alarm
She’s twerkin’ in boots on a lawn chair throne
With a raccoon wearin’ my cologne
Ain’t classy, but it sure feels right—
Just a tractor tappin’ love song kinda night

[Final Chorus]
Bottoms up where the weird feels right
Like a jello shot fight at prom night lite
Got a hay bale throne and a turkey band
With a tuba solo from a one-armed man
She’s moonwalkin' in a snorkel mask
Shoutin’ “YEEHAW” like it’s her full-time task
We ain’t fancy, but our hearts took flight—
In a tractor tappin’ love song kinda night

Tractor Tappin’ Love Song

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https://www.youtube.com/@theartificialhomewreckers

We country swerving a tad towards rock n roll! You can easily navigate genres in the Playlist section.

Strumming their way through heartbreak, hilarity, and highway hijinks, The Artificial Home Wreckers are a country rock band like no other. Born from a chance encounter at a roadside diner with a broken jukebox, these renegades of rhythm specialize in songs that sound like a wild Friday night and feel like a hungover Saturday morning.

Their music is a cocktail of twangy guitars, foot-stomping beats, and lyrics that toe the line between tragic and downright ridiculous. From ballads about exes who "borrowed" their truck (and forgot to return it) to anthems about that one unforgettable karaoke night gone horribly wrong, they’ve got a tune for every lovable misfit out there.

Catch them on tour (if their GPS actually works this time), and remember their motto: “Breaking homes one chorus at a time!”

New tracks tagged #RedneckRomance,