“You Said Forever” — ese Spider ft. Devils SPIRITUALLY RESURRECTED
A heartbreak confession turned into a blade. This track cracks open the feeling of giving someone your soul just for them to walk away like it meant nothing. ese Spider bleeds his story, and Devil steps in with that cold truth — “you said you’d be with me forever… you got me on empty… put a bullet through my brain when you lie.”

It’s raw, it’s vulnerable, it’s powerful.
Two voices, one broken promise.
A love that shattered, and a king rebuilding his crown from the pieces.

If you ever loved hard, lost harder, or felt that pain in your chest you couldn’t explain… this song is that feeling in audio form.

You said forever ft Devils SPIRITUALLY RESURRECTED)prod by Ahnboi

“Hard to Love” is a raw, confessional pop ballad about being the storm in your own relationship—and the miracle of someone who stays anyway. The song walks through kitchen fights, bathroom breakdowns, half-packed bags, and quiet nights where the truth finally lands. Intimate vocals and cinematic production frame lyrics about self-sabotage, attachment, and learning to love someone back as well as they love you. It’s the soundtrack for every overthinker who’s still somehow, miraculously, loved.

Hard to Love

A vulnerable alt-pop ballad about admitting you’re not the hero in your own story. This track lives in the spaces between late-night trains, highway shoulders, and quiet rooms where the truth finally gets spoken out loud. Intimate vocals, cinematic production, and confessional lyrics explore what it means to be loved when you’re breaking more than you’re fixing—and to have someone stay when the best of you keeps slipping through their hands.

Not the Hero

A heartbreak song about betrayal, broken promises, and trying to survive the pain left behind.

━━━ LYRICS ━━━

[Verse]
Heart cracked, shadows on my ceiling
Said it was love, now I'm reeling
Promises whispered, now they screaming
Silent nights turned to heavy breathing

Every word felt sacred, now it’s tainted
Your picture framed, but the glass is faded
Painted dreams in the dark, they jaded
Truth untold, my soul invaded

[Prechorus]
Tell me, was it real or just a scene?
Smoke and mirrors, love between the seams

[Chorus]
You lied to me, told me we were forever
Now I’m drowning, searching for the tether
You lied to me, said we’d heal together
Now it’s cold, and I’m lost in the weather

[Verse 2]
Lipstick stains on my collarbone
Found your scent in places I don’t roam
Tried to call you, but it hit the tone
Echoed silence, left me all alone

Late nights, pacing like I’m haunted
Truth hurts, but it’s you I wanted
Caught in webs of the lies you flaunted
Now I’m staring at the love you taunted

You Lied to Me

Better Without You is the moment you finally realize leaving was the best thing you ever did. Hoodies on kitchen chairs, playlists deleted, solo trips booked, and a chorus that feels like rolling the windows down on your new life.

Better Without You

Closed Doors - Jamie P

Lyrics:
I was lost in a world of grief
When she walked out of the door
A complication made her leave
Left her hairband on the floor

Four years in and I think we've let it go
This relationship is getting old and stale
I remember the days when we laid on the wet grass
And I miss the way that you looked in your bed clothes

I'm sitting all alone now
And I know that it's true to say
That you are moving on to better things
If I could relive these moments
I'd spend them all with you
Yes, I would — but I can't ’cause

I was hurt when she left home
Oh, she closed that door on me
Saddening to depart
Now I've got a broken heart
But she closed that door on me
Just leaving more closed doors

Picked her hairband off the floor
And placed it by the picture frame
Began to break down even more
As I was the one to blame

"Love you, I do" — these are the words I told you
You stutter, hesitate, act rather coldly
Maybe it weren't meant to be
But I pushed you on and on
I regret the day that I was a jerk to you

I'm sitting all alone now
And I know that it's true to say
That you are getting into other things
If I could relive these moments
I'd spend ’em all with you
Yes I would — but I can't ’cause

I was hurt when she left home
But she closed that door on me
Saddening to depart
Now I've got a broken heart
But she closed that door on me
Just leaving more closed doors
---

Composition/Lyrics/Production/Mixing/Mastering: James Peterson

(Recorded At East London Arts & Music, July 2017)

Closed Doors - Single

Closed Doors

Closed Doors - Single (2017)

“The Only Way to Love You Now” is a heartbreak confession from a man who realizes too late that love isn’t about holding on—it’s about stepping aside so the person you hurt can finally heal.

Over a slow-burning alt-country/Americana backdrop, Kade Merrin walks through the wreckage of a relationship he couldn’t stop breaking, owning every scar he left behind. This song lives in the space between apology and acceptance, where you’d “burn every bridge… just to unburn one with you,” but know deep down that the kindest thing you can do is let them go.

If you’ve ever watched someone you love finally find peace without you—and had to learn that real love sometimes means disappearing from their story—this one’s for you. Turn it up, sit with the lyrics, and let it hurt in all the right ways

© 2025 Kade Merrin (Mark Beegle). All rights reserved.
Written by Mark Beegle Registered with ASCAP.
Unauthorized reproduction, distribution, or use of this recording is prohibited.

The Only Way to Love You Now

An emotional song about a toxic love that began with hate, turned into obsession, and ended in heartbreak.

━━━ LYRICS ━━━

[Verse 1]
Silent nights, heard the echo in the walls
Shattered glass, broke my heart with your calls
Cold like the winter, you froze up my spring
Every word you spoke, it cut like a ring

Tears in the mirror, smudged my mascara line
Swore I’d leave, but I stayed for the hundredth time
A ghost in your arms, chasing shadows, I'm cursed
But let’s not forget—I hated you first

[Chorus]
I hated you first, before I loved you worse
Before the flame burned bright, before the pain rehearsed
I hated you first, it’s the truth that hurts
You were my poison, I drank the thirst

[Verse 2]
Late night whispers, your voice in my veins
Every kiss a gamble, but I’m losing the game
The lies you told, they tattooed on my skin
Pulled me in the deep, taught me how to swim

Fingers on my chest, like a dagger with grace
You smiled through the tears, a thief with no trace
I built you a kingdom, you left me dispersed
But even in ruins—I hated you first

[Pre-Chorus]
Memory rewind, it’s a slow-motion burst
Every laugh, every fight, every line rehearsed
I hated you first, before I knew your worth

I Hated You First

“Kitchen Floor” is a late-night lo-fi confession about the moment after the big fight—when the anger’s burned out, the words are spent, and all that’s left is two tired people sitting on the linoleum, choosing not to walk away. Whispered female vocals, intimate acoustic guitar, room noise, and a soft ambient pad create a raw, lived-in atmosphere: fridge hum, glass sliding, a spill that turns into laughter. No grand apologies, no epic speeches—just a quiet truce and a fragile kind of love that says, “We don’t have to fix it all tonight. I’m just glad you’re still here.” Perfect for headphones, late nights, and anyone who’s ever made up on a kitchen floor instead of in a movie scene.

Kitchen Floor

An emotional song about heartbreak, feeling abandoned, and trying to survive the silence after someone walks away.

━━━ LYRICS ━━━

[Verse]
Late night, staring at the ceiling,
Heart cracked open, no time for healing.
You left me stranded, left me cursed,
Could’ve sworn I loved you first.

Echoes in the walls, they murmur your name,
Tried to move on, but it’s never the same.
Thought we’d bloom, now I’m stuck in the dirt,
Guess the truth hurts—
You left me first.

[Chorus]
You left me first, now I’m drowning in the silence,
This heart, this pain, this cold alliance.
You left me first, now I’m chasing the ghosts,
You were my heaven, now I’m lost on this coast.

[Verse 2]
Fingertips trace where your warmth used to be,
Memories drip like tears in the sea.
You wrote the script, I played my role,
But you walked out and stole my soul.

Candlelight flicker, shadows on the wall,
Falling in slow motion, I recall it all.
Promises whispered, now they feel rehearsed,
But none of that matters—
You left me first.

[Chorus]
You left me first, now I’m drowning in the silence,
This heart, this pain, this cold alliance.
You left me first, now I’m chasing the ghosts,
You were my heaven, now I’m lost on this coast.

[Bridge]
What did I miss? Was it something I said?
Lying here haunted by the words in my head.
Your perfume lingers, a ghost in my bed,
Left me in pieces, my heart painted red.

You Left Me First

I am an artist shaped by real life using reality to master what's  not—heartbreak, redemption, and the long road back to truth.
I started writing music as a way to make sense of the world around me: the people I’ve loved, the mistakes I’ve owned, and the hope I still chase. Every song I create is built on honesty—raw stories pulled from the deepest parts of my life. From dark piano ballads to acoustic confessions, my music is where regret meets healing and where the human heart finds its voice again.

I’m not trying to be perfect—I’m just trying to be real. My journey hasn’t been easy, but it’s given me something better than perfection: perspective. If my songs can make someone feel understood, less alone, or brave enough to face their own truth, then I’ve done what I came here to do.


CYBER CHORD writes songs the way a porch light holds a night: small, steady, and impossible to ignore. I work with AI as a true co-writer, then carve the lyric by hand and shape the track in Suno. The sound leans bare and human—country roots in the soil, a little rock grain in the teeth, and a faith-lit lift that chooses hope without preaching.

These are ordinary-room hymns: rings hidden in cotton, receipt-tape strings, a dress behind rain glass, a sink that cools while you find the words. Silence is an instrument here; sometimes there’s a full bar where the house gets to breathe. If a line can’t survive a campfire and a cracked mug, it doesn’t make the song.

If you’re new, start with the heartbreakers. They don’t shout. They stay. I believe in the holiness of the everyday, and in the quiet bravery of saying the thing before “later” takes it away.

No paid promo, no playlist buys, no cover-art pitches, no dance offers, no cold DMs. If it’s a pitch, the porch light’s off. If you’re a real listener, come in soft: pick one song, leave a genuine note (lyric or timestamp welcome), and hand it to one friend. That’s how this fire stays lit.

May your road stay open, your coffee stay warm, and your day be peaceful.

Ese Spider
Mexican Artist 
Laid-back rap with a chill energy and smooth flow.
DBZ fan • Creative • Dedicated to making music
Promoter & artist building his own sound.

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