"Rising Through the Darkness" is a powerful and emotionally charged anthem that tackles the raw realities of living with depression and anxiety. This indie rock ballad blends haunting melodies with uplifting rhythms, creating a sonic journey that mirrors the ups and downs of mental health struggles.

The song's lyrics offer an unflinchingly honest look at the daily battle against inner demons, while simultaneously conveying a message of hope and resilience. The verses paint a vivid picture of the weight of depression, while the chorus serves as a rallying cry for those fighting to stay afloat.

Musically, the track builds from quiet introspection to soaring, cathartic choruses, mirroring the emotional journey of rising above one's darkest moments. The bridge offers a glimpse of hope, with its imagery of dawn breaking and scars fading, before leading into a final, triumphant chorus.

"Rising Through the Darkness" speaks to anyone who has ever grappled with mental health issues, offering both validation of their struggles and encouragement to keep fighting. It's a testament to the human spirit's capacity to endure and overcome, even in the face of seemingly insurmountable odds.

Lyrics:

Woke up, feeling lost
Another sleepless night
The weight upon my chest
Just won't let me find the light
I paint a smile so bright
To hide the storm inside
If I say I'm fine, it's just a line to keep it out of sight

I know I'm not the only one
Who's fighting just to stay
But even through the darkest times
I'll find a way, some way
No, I'm not OK, but that's alright
We'll make it through, we'll find the light
It's not OK, but we're all gonna be alright

Some days, it's hard to breathe
The shadows pull me down
I wrestle with the fears
And the whispers all around
But there's a strength in me
A fire that won't fade
I keep on pushing through, even on my hardest days

I know I'm not the only one
Who's fighting just to stay
But even through the darkest times
I'll find a way, some way
No, I'm not OK, but that's alright
We'll make it through, we'll find the light
It's not OK, but we're all gonna be alright

One day we'll see the dawn
The night will turn to day
Our scars will start to fade
And wash the pain away
We'll rise above it all
With hope that never dies
In the end, we'll find our way beneath the endless skies

I know I'm not the only one
Who's fighting just to stay
But even through the darkest times
I'll find a way, some way
No, I'm not OK, but that's alright
We'll make it through, we'll find the light
It's not OK, but we're all gonna be alright

Gonna be alright
Gonna be alright
We’re not OK, but that's alright
We’ll find our way into the light

Rising Through The Darkness

Buy on iTunes

"Unmasked Reflections" is an exploration of personal authenticity and the human experience. The song delves into the struggle between societal expectations and one's true self, using the metaphor of removing masks to represent the journey towards genuine self-expression.

Unmasked Reflections

"Shadows in the Mirror" is an exploration of living with mental health struggles, particularly depression and anxiety. The song captures the isolation, the daily struggle to function, and the exhausting effort of maintaining a facade of normalcy while battling inner demons. Despite the heavy themes, the song concludes with a glimmer of hope and determination to persevere.

Shadows in the Mirror

"A bittersweet ode to the intricate bond between mother and daughter. This song explores the depths of unconditional love, the pain of necessary distance, and the longing for what could have been.It's a raw, honest look at the complexity of family ties - how we can love deeply yet need to protect ourselves.A heartfelt tribute to the dreams, disappointments, and enduring connection that defines this unique relationship."

Oil And Water

It doesn't feel right
I can't believe it
It doesn't feel right
I can't believe it

If it's not from my heart
I don't want it
If it's not from my heart
I don't want it

Authenticity
Authenticity
Authenticity
Authenticity

I gotta feel it
I gotta need it
I gotta feel it
I gotta need it

Make me believe it
Make me see it
Make me believe it
Make me see it

Authenticity
Authenticity
Authenticity
Authenticity

I gotta feel it
I gotta need it
I gotta feel it
I gotta need it

Make me believe it
Make me see it
Make me believe it
Make me see it

Authenticity
Authenticity
Authenticity
Authenticity

Authenticity

'I'm Sorry' is a raw, introspective dialogue exploring the complex relationship we often have with ourselves during depression. Originally written in 2021 during a period of treatment-resistant depression, this piece has evolved from written word to an acoustic arrangement that pairs vulnerable lyrics with simple guitar strumming. The narrative style deliberately breaks from traditional song structure to maintain the authenticity of its origins as a written piece.

This track is part of a series of works, including 'St;ll Here' and 'Your Echo Fades,' that document a personal journey through mental health challenges. By sharing this piece, I hope to reach others who may see their own struggles reflected in these words and remind them they're not alone in their journey.

Content warning: This track contains themes related to depression and negative self-talk.

Lyrics:

I’m sorry for what I’ve done to you.
I’m sorry for the names I’ve always called you.
I’m sorry that I never gave you enough, 
I’d simply leave you locked in handcuffs.
I pushed you aside when I knew you needed help, 
you begged me to stop, you begged and yelped.
You begged to be treated with the simple kindness I gave others, 
but even the thought of it would make me shudder.
You stood as I told people they were gorgeous and pretty, 
but the sight of you would just make me sickly.
Others were always smarter, stronger, happier and stable.
Something I told you, ‘You’d never be able’.
We’d laugh together, cry together, even travel the world together.
But I never considered you my friend.  Not ever.
I can’t even recall saying that I loved you, 
even after all the shit I put you through.
You’re always there for me, through thick and thin.
You carried me through every loss and every win. 
So as I stare in the mirror it’s still hard for me to see.
That I am you.  And you are me.

I'm Sorry

Play House
(Written by Matthew Peele)

Let’s not play house

I’ve played that game a million times
Hung my dreams on painted walls
Built a life just to watch it fall

I want the mess, I want the truth
Not the script they handed you

Don’t light the candles just to blow ‘em out
Don’t say forever if we’re full of doubt
I’ve kissed the air and called it love
Built a house just to burn it up
So fuck that script, let’s tear the lines
Don’t play house with me this time

I’ve set the table, poured the wine
Waited on love that never felt like mine
Played house in shoes that didn’t fit
And stayed too long in all of it

I’ve lived in rooms where love was thin
Taped up cracks and called it “within”
I’ve smiled through fights and dimmed my light
But I won’t do that shit tonight

Don’t light the candles just to blow ‘em out
Don’t say forever if we’re full of doubt
I’ve kissed the air and called it love
Built a house just to burn it up
So fuck that script, let’s tear the lines
Don’t play house with me this time

Oh Don’t light the candles just to blow ‘em out
Don’t say forever if we’re full of doubt
I’ve kissed the air and called it love
Built a house just to burn it up
So fuck that script, let’s tear the lines
Don’t play house with me this time

Let’s not play house
Let’s not play house
Don’t say forever
If we are full of doubt
I’ve kissed the air
Called it love
Built a house just to burn it up

So fuck that script, let’s tear the lines
Don’t play house with me this time

Oh, don’t light the candles just to blow ‘em out
Don’t say forever if we’re full of doubt
I’ve kissed the air and called it love
Built a house just to burn it up

Don’t light the candles just to blow ‘em out
Don’t say forever if we’re full of doubt
I’ve kissed the air and called it love
Built a house just to burn it up

Don’t light the candles just to blow ‘em out
Don’t say forever if we’re full of doubt
I’ve kissed the air and called it love
Built a house just to burn it up
Let’s not play house

Man On The Moon

Play House

“Let’s Break Up” speaks from the quiet place where some veterans find themselves — emotionally worn, misunderstood, and resigned. The narrator isn't angry. He’s tired. Tired of pretending, tired of the miscommunication, tired of watching love slip through the cracks of an invisible battle.

This song captures what happens when a partner doesn't see the war within — the one the veteran fights every day. Instead of dragging someone through their storm, they let go… not because they don’t care, but because they believe it’s kinder. It’s not apathy — it’s surrender.

For those living with mental health injuries, this track is a brutally honest reflection: sometimes love can’t reach the places where pain has taken root. And sometimes, you just don’t have the strength to explain why.

Let's Break Up

In Lesson 8 of The Emotional Intelligence Series, Professor RJ Starr explores the difference between emotional honesty and oversharing. This psychology-based lesson offers a grounded approach to vulnerability, helping you express what’s real without flooding others or exposing yourself too quickly. A guide to honest, discerning, emotionally intelligent connection.


Lesson 8 - How to Be Emotionally Honest Without Oversharing

I’ve been opened, sewn, scanned, and sent home more times than I’d care to count. After a while it stops feeling like survival and starts feeling like routine. The body memorizes the drill, the mind learns to wait its turn, and somewhere in the repetition you start to laugh at how ordinary it’s become. “Cut Me Clean” isn’t about pain or triumph. It’s about the maintenance of being alive. You heal, you return, you do it again. Not because you’re strong, but because you still can.

Songs I've Lived By

Cut Me Clean

I learned early not to ask for too much
someone always had it worse.
If I cried, they said, “You’re fine,”
so I learned to smile first.
Some of us had parents fighting,
some just had the silence thick as walls.
Either way, I learned to shrink
before I learned to call.

I build exits into every conversation,
I pull away before you know my name.
Call it coping, call it preservation,
but it’s fear wearing someone else’s face.
Yeah, I build exits into every conversation
and then I hate the quiet that remains.

Some of us grew up fixing things
we didn’t break ourselves.
Some of us got used to praise
that only came when we excelled.
I say I’m busy when I’m lonely,
I ghost before I’m ghosted back.
I joke too soon, I care too late,
I call it freedom, but it’s lack.

I build exits into every conversation,
I pull away before you know my name.
Call it coping, call it preservation,
but it’s fear wearing someone else’s face.
Yeah, I build exits into every conversation and then I hate the quiet that remains.

I’m not heartless, I’m rehearsed.
Every kindness comes with proof.
I wait for people to leave
just to say, “See? I knew.”
I call it strong, I call it smart,
but really, it’s just scared dressed sharp.

I build exits into every conversation,
turn open doors into escape plans.
Call it coping, call it survival,
but I’m still that kid, just grown-up hands.
Yeah, I build exits into every conversation
and I wish I knew how not to.

exits

They say people are mirrors.
But every mirror bends the light.
You don’t see me, you see yourself
your want, your fear, your outline.
And I do it too.
I translate faces into safety,
voices into proof that I still exist.
We call that empathy.
But it’s just evolution wearing perfume.

I just want to be fucking seen
without translation, without transaction.
Not your lesson, not your reflection,
just the pulse that’s under all the noise.
I just want to be fucking seen
and not mistaken for your dream.

When I was small I learned the trick:
smile, listen, mirror back.
Connection as survival,
love as camouflage.
Now I can make anyone feel understood,
and die a little doing it.
We build our kindness like currency,
spend it to stay human.
But what if all we’re buying is delay?

I just want to be fucking seen
without translation, without transaction.
Not your lesson, not your reflection,
just the pulse that’s under all the noise.
I just want to be fucking seen
and not mistaken for your dream.

Maybe empathy is gravity:
it keeps us close,
but crushes if you hold too long.
Maybe love is a language
with no native speakers.
Maybe the truest thing we do
is try anyway.

I just want to be fucking seen
not forgiven, not believed, just met.
No halo, no feed, no screen.
I just want to be fucking seen.

i just want to be fucking seen

Thank you for sticking with me and listening to my songs. I notice the ones who show up, the ones who keep coming back, the ones who let this music into their life. That means more to me than I can put into words.

I hope these songs have given you the same strength and peace they’ve given me. I write them to lift the soul and the spirit, because in times like these, we need every bit of light we can find.

If there’s one thing I want you to remember, it’s this: never give up on yourself. If you want something, you have to work for it and sometimes you have to work hard as hell just to move forward. But I believe in you. I believe you’ll reach that first goal on your journey. And when you do, don’t stop. Keep going. There’s always another level waiting.

In the meantime, there’s a whole universe of music here for you to explore. These songs are written from lived experience and created to be felt, not just heard. If any of them speak to you, let me know.

Welcome to the way my mind works.

Welcome to my world.

Cheers,
MDRJR

Call It Magic ✧ Full Album
Now streaming exclusively on all streaming services ✨

I’m super proud of this project — every track holds a piece of me, and I can’t wait for you to hear it.

Thank you for listening, sharing, and supporting — this is just the beginning. 💫

Xak Stahl: Alchemist of Sound, Architect of Emotion

Xak Stahl is a genre-blurring music artist, sonic storyteller, and relentless experimenter. Every track he creates is a new world—a kaleidoscope of indie folk, alt-pop, electronica, and global flavors—infused with raw emotion and boundless curiosity. Xak’s music isn’t just heard; it’s felt.

From Shadow to Spotlight

For Xak, music is metamorphosis. His journey began in the shadows, transmuting heartbreak and struggle into songs that glow with hope. Early anthems like “Neon Dreams” and “Rising Through the Darkness” invite listeners to find their own light. His newest project, Major Arcana, channels the mysteries of the Tarot—each song an archetype, each lyric a step along the path from the Fool’s first leap to the wisdom of The World.

More Than Music: A Multisensory Universe

But Xak isn’t confined to sound. As a visual artist and writer, he crafts immersive stories that spill across genres and languages—sometimes haunting, sometimes playful, always honest. Whether he’s conjuring lush soundscapes, weaving bilingual lyrics, or creating striking visuals, Xak’s art dares you to feel deeper and dream wilder.

An Invitation to Transformation

Join Xak Stahl on a sonic odyssey that blurs borders—between genres, between artforms, between you and the music. Each release is an invitation to explore, to heal, to become. For Xak, every song is a spell, every album a universe. The only question is: are you ready to step inside?

Godvliet Records | Where Stories and Music Converge

Welcome to Godvliet Records, your destination for music that transcends genres, decades and speaks to the soul. 

Join us on this journey and discover music that moves you. Likes, shares, comments are welcome

Subscribe now and be part of our growing community of music enthusiasts.

Mi Mate Music – Giving Sound to Silent Struggles

Mi Mate Music is a purpose-driven creative project transforming lived experiences into powerful, emotionally charged tracks. Founded by Dennis Weston, this initiative supports individuals—particularly war veterans living with invisible injuries such as PTSD and other mental health conditions—in expressing what too often goes unsaid.

Through music, we help broken people tell their stories in ways that are honest, raw, and empowering. These tracks are more than just songs—they are lived moments, captured in sound.

Our mission is twofold: to support healing through creative expression, and to foster greater understanding of the silent battles many veterans and others endure daily. Every lyric and every beat is crafted to inspire empathy, connection, and insight into the challenges of mental health injuries.

Whether you're navigating your own journey or seeking to understand someone else's, Mi Mate Music offers a soundtrack grounded in truth, resilience, and hope.

Your support helps us continue turning real stories into music that matters.

🌟 **Join Me on This Musical Journey!** 🌟  
I'm open to collaboration, just reach out via e-mail. I create all my music. I write it, mix it, run it through several systems, and if the voice isn't mine, it's created by me and trained. I have taught myself how to mix through audacity, and soundtrap, etc and still learning. I have been coding since I was 11 years old, writing since about 5 years old, telling stories since I was two and singing since I was 4. I can sight read, read and badly notate music, and play the piano. I'm teaching myself how to play the drums right now. 

In the next few weeks I’ll be reworking SoundCloud. Enjoy the songs. I’ll be slowing down the music process to 1 song to 2 songs per week now. I will start to transition the current songs to other platforms for easier listening. If anyone has favs they want available earlier, let me know. Enjoy!

Listen to my music. 
I'm a traveler of Worlds. 
Creator of realms, and storyteller at heart. 

Never stop dreaming, never stop laughing, and never stop listening. 
Always do your own research. 

I stand for unity and chilling out with as many people with like-minded vibes as I can.  

In my free time I like to hang out in my mind and create stories about other Worlds, mainly involving complicated time travel nonlinear plots. Wanna know my story? 
Just ask me? 


My songs are my journal, and an open music lab experiment. I need to make music to not be depressed and go into dark, dark places. It's like water for me. 

Feel free to share here, but if you use it for nefarious purposes, well I believe in karma . Peace out, and see you soon. 

Enjoy and never forget, question everything!

Professor RJ Starr is an academic psychologist, educator, and author exploring the inner life through the lens of emotional intelligence, regulation, and self-awareness.
This SoundCloud page features original short-form audio recordings—thoughtful reflections designed to help listeners navigate their emotions, relationships, and personal growth with clarity and maturity.

To explore more of my work, visit https://profrjstarr.com

FR4CTUR3D is an experimental composer and singer-songwriter who turns raw experience into sound. Born with bidirectional synesthesia, he doesn’t just hear music; he sees and feels it as shifting color and form. Living with chronic leukemia, he writes from a place where fragility and resilience meet. His songs move between cinematic layers and stripped-down confessionals, each piece a translation of emotion into vibration. Featured on Rolling Hype for “turning noise into meaning,” FR4CTUR3D creates not for fame but for connection... so others can find strength in the beauty that survives. Every note carries the pulse of persistence, a reminder that even fractured things can still shine when given the chance to be heard.

New tracks tagged #emotionalhonesty