In previous episodes, we’ve delved into the complex relationship gay men often have with body image shaped by societal expectations and stereotypes that idealize a lean, muscular physique, leading many to experience feelings of inadequacy and self-consciousness about their appearance. According to the National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders, gay and bisexual boys are significantly more likely to engage in harmful behaviors such as fasting, vomiting, or using laxatives and diet pills to control their weight.

In this episode, Roy Belzer, a body-positive fitness coach, joins us to share his personal journey with body image, discuss how he overcame disordered eating, and highlight the importance of inclusive fitness for the health and wellbeing of the LGBTQ+ community.

Full Episode:
https://www.ajadedgay.com/130-pride-in-motion-inclusive-fitness-and-body-positive-coaching-with-roy-belzer/

Related Episodes:
Listen to Episode 32. Gay Men and Body Obsession
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/32-gay-men-and-body-obsession/id1619338054?i=1000587100192

Listen to Episode 82. Gay Gym Culture
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/82-gay-gym-culture/id1619338054?i=1000634753158

Listen to Episode 91. Fat and Fabulous: Embrace Body Positivity (with Matthew Simko)
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/91-fat-and-fabulous-embrace-body-positivity-with/id1619338054?i=1000647209423

Additional Resources:
Learn More About Roy Belzer
https://www.roybelzerfitness.com/

Schedule a Chat with Roy
https://calendly.com/roy-belzer/15min

Follow Roy on Instagram
https://www.tiktok.com/@roybelzerfitness

Follow Roy on TikTok
https://www.tiktok.com/@roybelzerfitness

Connect with Roy on Facebook
https://www.facebook.com/roybelzerfitness/

Check Out Roy’s Men’s Health Magazine Feature
https://www.menshealth.com/health/a46179519/body-acceptance-stories/?fbclid=IwAR0wkf4sp1ynZRRmhFCcP6w5zQa4ns4atfMaThlOJH8MdAoVK9qbs10XXOo

Eating Disorder Statistics
https://anad.org/eating-disorder-statistic/

130. Pride in Motion: Inclusive Fitness and Body-Positive Coaching (with Roy Belzer)

Since 1865, the Salvation Army has provided social services, such as shelter, food, and rehabilitation programs, to people in need. While known for its goodwill and iconic holiday red kettle campaign, the organization has faced controversy within the LGBTQ+ community over past policies and statements perceived as discriminatory.

In this episode, we’re exploring the Salvation Army’s complex relationship with the LGBTQ+ community and the steps it has taken in recent years to improve inclusivity.

Full Episode:
https://www.ajadedgay.com/131-ringing-in-controversy-the-salvation-armys-complicated-relationship-with-the-lgbtq-community/

Additional Resources:
Committee’s Inquiry into Institutional Responses to Child Sexual Abuse
https://web.archive.org/web/20130828082009/http:/salvos.org.au/about-us/media-centre/documents/MRVictorianParliamentaryCommitteeInquiry.pdf

Suit Claims Group's Staff Is Pressured On Religion
https://www.nytimes.com/2004/02/25/nyregion/suit-claims-group-s-staff-is-pressured-on-religion.html

Settlement in Salvation Army Suit on Proselytizing
https://archive.nytimes.com/cityroom.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/02/17/settlement-in-salvation-army-suit-on-proselytizing/?_r=0

No Ban on Harry Potter, Twilight Xmas Donations, Says Sally Ann
https://www.thestar.com/news/canada/no-ban-on-harry-potter-twilight-xmas-donations-says-sally-ann/article_960140df-14e5-5a1f-99a4-950986847d40.html

The Salvation Army's History of Anti-LGBT Discrimination
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/the-salvation-armys-histo_b_4422938

Salvation Army Cuts S.F. Programs / Charity Spurns City's Domestic Partner Law
https://www.sfgate.com/news/article/salvation-army-cuts-s-f-programs-charity-3004997.php

Charity Is Told It Must Abide By Antidiscrimination Laws
https://www.nytimes.com/2001/07/11/us/charity-is-told-it-must-abide-by-antidiscrimination-laws.html

Salvation Army Uses Homeless to Fight Gay Benefits
https://chicago.gopride.com/news/article.cfm/articleid/1824489

B.C. Salvation Army Volunteer Tells Gay Rights Supporters Not to Donate
https://bc.ctvnews.ca/b-c-salvation-army-volunteer-tells-gay-rights-supporters-not-to-donate-1.1081136

Statement in Response to Australian Radio Interview
https://www.salvationarmyusa.org/usc-wm4/news/radio_interview_statement/

Salvation Army Refers People to Ex-Gay Groups
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/salvation-army-refers-people-to-ex-gay-groups_b_4344605

Salvation Army 'Does Not Consider Homosexual Orientation a Sin'
https://www.advocate.com/business/2013/11/27/salvation-army-does-not-consider-homosexual-orientation-sin

Ellie Goulding Threatens to Cancel Her Cowboys Thanksgiving Halftime Show Over Salvation Army Concerns
https://www.dallasnews.com/arts-entertainment/music/2019/11/12/ellie-goulding-threatens-to-cancel-performance-during-cowboys-thanksgiving-halftime-show/

Salvation Army Says It's No Longer Homophobic
https://www.out.com/news/2019/11/18/salvation-army-says-theyre-no-longer-homophobic

Chick-fil-A Stops Donations To Anti-LGBTQ Groups
https://www.forbes.com/sites/rachelsandler/2019/11/18/chick-fil-a-stops-donations-to-anti-lgbtq-groups/

Macy's Won't Host Salvation Army This Holiday Season
https://www.advocate.com/news/2022/11/18/macys-wont-host-salvation-army-holiday-season

Salvation Army Commander: Yes, We Are Faith-Based Charity. But We Serve and Love Everyone.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/voices/2019/11/22/salvation-army-lgbt-backlash-poverty-gay-marriage-column/4269694002/

Support the show
https://www.patreon.com/ajadedgaypod

Get Your Merch
https://a-jaded-gay.creator-spring.com/

131. Ringing in Controversy: The Salvation Army's Complicated Relationship with the LGBTQ+ Community

Following the harm inflicted on the LGBTQ+ community under the Trump administration from 2017-2021, including attacks on transgender rights and the rollback of anti-discrimination protections, many fear what the new era of Trump may bring. However, it’s vital that we remain unified, support one another, and continue to advocate for equality to protect and expand the progress we’ve made.

In this episode, previous guests join us to share their messages of hope and optimism for the future of the LGBTQ+ community as we brace for the challenges that will come with this administration.

Full Episode:
https://www.ajadedgay.com/134-a-message-of-hope-for-the-lgbtq-community/

Related Episodes:
Listen to Episode 112. Project 2025
https://www.ajadedgay.com/112-project-2025/

Listen to Episode 122. A Queer Review of the Trump Administration (2017 – 2021)
https://www.ajadedgay.com/122-a-queer-review-of-the-trump-administration-2017-2021/

Additional Resources:
Sign the Petition to Reject Project 2025
https://sign.moveon.org/petitions/publicly-reject-project-2025?after_action=ssd3

Sign the Petition Urging Congress to Pass the Equality Act
https://action.aclu.org/send-message/pass-equality-act

Support the show
https://www.patreon.com/ajadedgaypod

Get Your Merch
https://a-jaded-gay.creator-spring.com/

134. A Message Of Hope For The LGBTQ Community

While playful putdowns and throwing shade have long been a celebrated form of humor and bonding among gay men, they can sometimes perpetuate cliques, exclusion, and toxic behaviors within the community. Not only does this behavior reinforces harmful stereotypes like the "bitchy queen" or "mean gay," but it also deepens divisions in an already marginalized community, reflecting the way we are often treated by the larger world.

In this episode, we're exploring why mean gay behavior manifests, the impact it has on our community, and ways we can foster kindness and support among one another.

Full Episode:
https://www.ajadedgay.com/135-dont-be-a-mean-gay/

Related Episodes:
Listen to Episode 34. GBF: Gay Best Friend
https://www.ajadedgay.com/34-gbf-gay-best-friend/

Listen to Episode 38. Learning to Accept Kindness
https://www.ajadedgay.com/38-learning-to-accept-kindness/

Listen to Episode 53. Stop Comparing Yourself to Other Gays
https://www.ajadedgay.com/53-stop-comparing-yourself-to-other-gays/

Additional Resources:
The Top 10 Reasons the Gay Community Is So Competitive
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/the-top-10-reasons-the-gay-community-is-so-competitive_b_7696812

10 Reasons Gay Men Are Hyper Competitive
https://www.pride.com/gay/2016/11/17/10-reasons-gay-men-are-hyper-competitive#rebelltitem1

Op-ed: Are Gay Men A Gay Man's Worst Enemy?
https://www.advocate.com/commentary/2013/03/11/op-ed-are-gay-men-gay-mans-worst-enemy

Ask a Homo: Bitchy Queens
https://slate.com/human-interest/2014/07/ask-a-homo-why-is-bitchiness-common-among-gay-men.html

When Does a Bitchy Queen Become Too Much?
https://www.out.com/michael-musto/2016/12/27/when-does-bitchy-queen-become-too-much

Gays Behaving Badly
https://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/jonny-harvey/gays-behaving-badly_b_17824412.html

Culture Slut: Dissecting the 'Mean Gays' Trope
https://www.polyesterzine.com/features/culture-slut-dissecting-the-mean-gays-trope

Matthew J. Dempsey on How Gay Men "Compare & Despair"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S27OXHYaR3A

Support the show
https://www.patreon.com/ajadedgaypod

Get Your Merch
https://a-jaded-gay.creator-spring.com/

135. Don't Be A Mean Gay

In previous episodes, we discussed how gay men often found refuge in mafia-owned private bottle clubs, where they could drink and socialize without the fear of police raids or public hostility. These underground venues, while risky due to their illegal nature, offered a rare safe haven where gay men could express themselves more freely and form a sense of community away from the prying eyes of a largely unwelcoming society.

In this episode, crime writer Chris Holcombe joins us to discuss how gay speakeasies emerged during the Prohibition era as secretive, underground venues where LGBTQ+ individuals could gather away from the scrutiny and persecution of mainstream society.

Full Episode:
https://www.ajadedgay.com/136-closets-cocktails-the-secret-history-of-gay-speakeasies-with-chris-holcombe/

Related Episodes:
Listen to Episode 17. Mobsters & Mos: How the Mafia Owned Gay Nightlife
https://www.ajadedgay.com/17-mobsters-mos-how-the-mafia-owned-gay-nightlife/

Listen to Episode 63. The Stonewall Riots
https://www.ajadedgay.com/63-the-stonewall-riots/

Additional Resources:
Learn More About Chris Holcombe
https://www.chrisholcombe.com/

Follow Chris on Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/thechrisholcombe/

Support Chris on Patreon
http://patreon.com/ChrisHolcombeAuthor

Order the Hidden Gotham Series
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09N41NSDB?binding=kindle_edition&qid=1654001598&sr=1-1&ref=dbs_dp_rwt_sb_pc_tukn

Subscribe to Chris’s Monthly Emails
http://www.chrisholcombe.com/sign-up

Gay New York: Gender, Urban Culture, and the Making of the Gay Male World, 1890-1940
https://www.amazon.com/Gay-New-York-Culture-1890-1940/dp/1541699211/ref=sr_1_1?crid=WJSX56HPYMEV&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.CUvBr017OJeT1f5qvGyrCz44QK34Ozr8HOeC8QwAR2A1fG0wOa5ZEXsXhBI0itKjm1VVZ2A-iIA1MuNKGzbZAtfllwS8jsVe5ug33VwAJEObjwCClxb2fLc52yyxNsmb8p7aFzSPIrvtkdD2_74z8iJnVmGdPJmhOQMCD0TQaIk5XY2jjtrQ2XddLSTBKiH2fjk4V57i5I189-8CzYvTniqbV2BdGPJx5qQZ5yc9dQY.hV4SSSrmof_Etfp9sZXN3z-vZfoLYjZEiSGmrhiseHE&dib_tag=se&keywords=george+chauncey&qid=1736167273&sprefix=george+chauncey%2Caps%2C97&sr=8-1

Bulldaggers, Pansies, and Chocolate Babies
https://www.amazon.com/Bulldaggers-Pansies-Chocolate-Babies-Triangulations/dp/0472034898/ref=sr_1_1?crid=8HW7MMDE8P9P&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.iPQRsZuf4wL2ztZUYynvc_7id-54vCg1fQnF21MtDik.7WQj57gOmTRzgGdF6s7s382c4D5Eg9sfRDthEBPvVgw&dib_tag=se&keywords=bulldaggers%2C+pansies%2C+and+chocolate+babies&qid=1736167332&sprefix=pansies+bullda%2Caps%2C116&sr=8-1

Three Plays: Sex / The Drag / The Pleasure Man
https://www.amazon.com/Three-Plays-Sex-Drag-Pleasure/dp/0415909333/ref=sr_1_1?crid=YLHT25D0JY36&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.MkV9frxOw8L9QUIj25sB7NK7Owhs4WJ52EMDEjAth2rjjiEEqjXi30nDxjTiQ0uV9E8qtU6uimz6nwwnYpQCCb4loq6oP-RAZICG1xIhGORHSxmq3Sm0ZDJi7dUEEyh2cadp-9B3V7UmFBGQVrHg4WEunU-DTzUjK320zoG9waDAhLZ-PTTuQinXJvLvpts1mUTONHYFuhSNHxe2GU-bClM6MWEF1M_fjeSrBzbl2Dg.D7-ymoosKPOme53Pdk5orWEa5C9x8mZHJii2Z3mBiVc&dib_tag=se&keywords=Mae+West%27s+the+drag&qid=1736167385&sprefix=mae+west%27s+the+drag%2Caps%2C104&sr=8-1

The Speakeasy Glossary – Queer Slang of the Prohibition Era
https://dannyashkenasi.com/2015/08/26/the-speakeasy-glossary-queer-slang-of-the-prohibition-era/

Support the show
https://www.patreon.com/ajadedgaypod

Get Your Merch
https://a-jaded-gay.creator-spring.com/

136. Closets & Cocktails: The Secret History Of Gay Speakeasies (with Chris Holcombe)

The term "daddy" has been used as slang for over 300 years and was embraced by the gay community in the 1970s, particularly within the leather subculture, leading to the popular phrase "leather daddy." Today, in gay culture, "daddy" represents an older, confident, and nurturing figure, often admired for their authority, maturity, and sexual appeal, while also evoking playful and affectionate dynamics within romantic relationships.

In this episode, For the Love of DILFs star Sal Zambito joins us to explore what it means to be a daddy in gay culture, the journey of embracing the daddy identity, and the valuable lessons daddies and boys can learn from one another within the gay community.

Full Episode:
https://www.ajadedgay.com/137-whos-your-daddy-with-sal-zambito/

Additional Resources:
Follow Sal on Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/bigsaltv/

Follow Sal on TikTok
https://www.tiktok.com/@bigsal.tv

Check out Sal on For the Love of DILFs Season 2
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tibD2v8q5MQ

Learn More About For the Love of DILFs
https://www.outtvgo.com/details/TV_SHOW/collection/6319503491112/for-the-love-of-dilfs

Conception of a Question: Who's Your Daddy?
https://www.washingtonpost.com/archive/lifestyle/2005/01/04/conception-of-a-question-whos-your-daddy/2537a7cf-a4e5-46da-939a-7aff5d20519b/

Here's an Outrageously Comprehensive Guide to the Term 'Daddy'
https://www.esquire.com/lifestyle/sex/a21529729/internet-daddy-what-is-daddy-explainer/

Gay Daddy (Urban Dictionary)
https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Gay%20Daddy

Daddy (Know Your Meme)
https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/daddy

S and M : Studies in dominance and submission
https://search.worldcat.org/title/478487523

Support the show
https://www.patreon.com/ajadedgaypod

Get Your Merch
https://a-jaded-gay.creator-spring.com/

137. Who’s Your Daddy? (with Sal Zambito)

We’ve previously examined the history of gay representation in TV and film, tracing its evolution from early portrayals to groundbreaking moments like Ellen, which helped pave the way for greater visibility. Among these influential shows, Will & Grace stood out as a game-changer, bringing gay characters into mainstream sitcoms and normalizing LGBTQ+ identities for a wide audience—though its representation wasn’t without flaws.

In this episode, we’re exploring the conception of Will & Grace, its cultural significance, and the lasting impact it had on queer representation in television.

Full Episode:
https://www.ajadedgay.com/138-will-grace/

Related Episodes:
Listen to Episode 07. The History of Gay Representation in TV & Film
https://www.ajadedgay.com/07-the-history-of-gay-representation-in-tv-film/

Listen to Episode 12. Queer as Folk
https://www.ajadedgay.com/12-queer-as-folk/

Listen to Episode 55. Gay for Pay: Should Straight Actors Play Queer Characters?
https://www.ajadedgay.com/55-gay-for-pay-should-straight-actors-play-queer-characters/

Additional Resources:
Streaming Through Stereotypes: The Progress and Pitfalls of LGBTQ+ Representation in Media
https://www.ajadedgay.com/blog/streaming-through-stereotypes-the-progress-and-pitfalls-of-lgbtq-representation-in-media/

Queer as Folk: A Groundbreaking Journey of LGBTQ+ Representation
https://www.ajadedgay.com/blog/queer-as-folk-a-groundbreaking-journey-of-lgbtq-representation/

Will & Grace
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Will_%26_Grace

Pilot (Will & Grace)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pilot_(Will_%26_Grace)

Biden Says He is 'Absolutely Comfortable' with Same-Sex Marriage
https://archive.today/20120714223831/http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2012/05/06/biden-says-he-is-absolutely-comfortable-with-same-sex-marriage/

Obama Backs Gay Marriage
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/obama-gay-marriage_n_1503245

Support the show
https://www.patreon.com/ajadedgaypod

Get Your Merch
https://a-jaded-gay.creator-spring.com/

138. Will & Grace

Another day another episode, it’s the week before Eurovision starts so we are keeping ourselves busy. Today it’s time for the 2nd half of 1st semi. Some of the songs that are currently in the odds top 10, so we should be in for a treat! Available everywhere you find podcasts! 

MelloVision - S9E2

Hope you are ready, cuz we are diving head first into the second semifinal. And I think we might hit rock bottom...because we are gonna get served with some straight up stinkers in this, the first half. So bare with us, at least the episode is a good listen…just not these songs! 

MelloVision - S9E3

With the Eurovision week just around the corner it’s time to wrap things up. And so we do in the last of our pre-Eurovision episodes. Find out who we think is the best…and the worst! Who deserves to qualify and who shouldn’t even had bothered going to Basel. That and much more in episode four of the season!

MelloVision - S9E4

Living in a world of fuckboys, homophobes, and inequalities can leave a gay feeling, well, jaded, so tune in for your weekly dose of gay empowerment. We're talking pop culture, politics, and dating hardships, all through the lens of overcoming gay trauma and nurturing our emotional wellbeing.

A campy and brutally honest podcast totally devoted to Melodifestivalen and Eurovision Song Contest, with a Swedish perspective but with friends from all over the world. Available on Spotify, SoundCloud, iTunes and acast! Follow us on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook to keep up-to-date with the latest news from us and to interact with other listeners. ♥ ♥ ♥

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