Title: #1097 - Maths Genius - Let Me Bore You To Sleep

Episode Description:

Tune in for a uniquely engaging episode of "Let Me Bore You To Sleep" with your host, Jason Newland. In this episode, Jason humorously takes on the role of a "maths genius," diving into a light-hearted and often humorous exploration of mathematical concepts meant to be more amusing than informative. As he fumbles through basic math, Jason's aim is to relax your mind rather than challenge it, making the complexities of mathematics unexpectedly soothing.

Join Jason as he attempts to explain the beauty of numbers in the simplest ways possible, often getting the maths wrong, which adds to the quirky charm of the episode. Whether discussing the intricacies of the two times table or the enigma of prime numbers, Jason's monologue is designed to be gently meandering and barely coherent—perfect for lulling his listeners into a state of drowsy contentment.

Special Features:

A playful and gentle approach to mathematics.
Comedic asides and personal anecdotes that add depth to the narrative.
A calming backdrop with no distracting music, focusing solely on Jason's voice.
This episode is perfect for anyone looking for a humorous twist on a nighttime routine, providing both laughter and a peaceful pathway to sleep. Let Jason's mathematically themed monologue be the unexpected lullaby for your evening.

Listening Advisory: Best enjoyed in a relaxed setting where you can listen with a light heart and a ready smile. Not suitable for mathematical exam preparation.

Release Date: 15th April 2024

(no music) #1097 - Maths Genius - Let Me Bore You To Sleep - 15th April 2024)

(music) #1097 - Maths Genius - Let Me Bore You To Sleep - 15th April 2024)

(5 Hours) #1097 - Maths Genius - Let Me Bore You To Sleep - 15th April 2024)

(10 Hours) #1097 - Maths Genius - Let Me Bore You To Sleep - 15th April 2024)

Voice fragment recovered from Starbase 11.
After a solar storm disabled life support, biological systems were placed in cryostasis.
The station is now governed by an autonomous system.
It is functioning normally.
You may not be.

Fragmented messages continue to play.
Philosophical. Broken. Sometimes humorous.

— TEc bla bla
. Built using Studio One.
. Base sound construction: Unify (Pluginguru)
. Additional Sounds fromFred Nongat / Subsonic Artz
. Instruments: u-he Diva, Repro, UVI Meteor, and various FX

Message Not Approved

https://www.jasonnewland.com/
📄 “Sunday’s papers LMBYTS #1460 Jason Newland – 12th October 2025”
🕰 Duration: 1 hour, 35 minutes
🎙 Style: Casual, reflective, meandering, humorous
🐶 Recurring co-star: Vinnie the dog (adorable and opinionated as always)

🧘‍♂️ Overall Tone & Purpose Jason’s goal remains true to the “Let Me Bore You to Sleep” spirit — to gently ramble, muse, and entertain while helping listeners unwind or fall asleep. Though nominally a commentary on Sunday’s papers, it’s largely a relaxed and tangential exploration of Jason’s day, thoughts, and observations, with a few news stories sprinkled in.

🐾 Part 1: A Walk in the Park with Vinnie (0:00 – ~19:00)

Weather report (Jason-style): Lovely day, nice weather lately.
Bendy tree anecdote: Jason contemplates taking a funny picture pretending the tree bent under his weight. But alas — no phone, no photographer, and a confused passerby.
Fence and bush mystery: He hears an odd sound, thinks it’s from a bush, suspects it might be a toilet flushing in the woods (spoiler: it’s geese).
Vinnie as a philosophical sidekick: Jason imagines a full-on dialogue with Vinnie, who sasses him about bush ventriloquism and corrects him on the difference between hibernation and migration.
Squirrel TV habits: A hypothetical debate on whether squirrels watch Strictly Come Dancing during winter.
📰 Part 2: Avoiding the Serious News (~22:00 – 30:00)

Jason delays opening the papers, chatting more with Vinnie about the nature of the podcast — improvisational, soothing, not heavily scripted.
Vinnie teases Jason about his lack of professionalism, and Jason defends the charm of going unscripted.
🗞 Part 3: Paper Highlights – The (Mostly) Lighthearted Bits (~30:00 – 1:17:00) Jason flips through the Sunday Star, picking out quirky, amusing, or mildly absurd stories:

Brits face 4-hour EU border queues due to new face and fingerprint scanning systems.
Steve Coogan tired of people shouting “A-ha!” — Jason empathizes.
Dua Lipa performs at a drag bar — Jason admits he doesn't know her songs.
Sigourney Weaver (76!) may return in a new Alien film — Jason is surprised by her age.
Conker Championships scandal: An 83-year-old champ was accused (and cleared) of cheating with a steel nut. Jason is both amused and impressed.
Gen Z revives CDs – Jason grumbles affectionately about retro being things he still uses.
Jude Law says being seen as attractive is limiting — Jason mocks the “tragedy” of beauty.
Ryan Reynolds jokes raising a boy is harder than girls — Jason skeptically predicts teen daughters may prove otherwise.
Sam Fox says Brits don’t appreciate her singing due to her Page 3 past.
John Bishop biopic with Will Arnett playing him — Jason wonders why John didn’t play himself.
Brad Pitt moves in with his partner — Jason jokes about being overly concerned about celebrity relationships.
🪐 Part 4: Astrology & Oddities (1:28:00 – end)

Horoscopes with Russell Grant – Jason reads horoscopes in a friendly tone, paying extra attention to Virgo (his sign) and Pisces (potential soulmates, perhaps?).
Odd news:
Talking litter bins in a Dutch theme park.
Nude Christmas dinner at a Southampton pub for naturists.
Karate black belts earned by two women aged 79.
Edible cucumber packaging.
Ark orbital capsule for fast emergency deliveries.
Influencers with music careers, including Addison Rae.
Jason ends with gentle reminders of kindness, self-care, and love.
❤️ Themes & Takeaways

Gentle, slow humour: Delivered in Jason’s trademark soft-spoken, rambly style.
Absurdity & affection for the mundane: Whether it’s geese honking or a newspaper pun, Jason leans into the small, funny oddities of life.
Imaginary conversations with Vinnie are rich with irony and warmth — an ongoing highlight of the LMBYTS episodes.
Sleepy vibes: Everything is structured (loosely) to help you relax, chuckle a bit, and drift off.

(music) Sunday’s papers  LMBYTS #1460  Jason Newland  12th October 2025

(no music) (5 hours) Sunday’s papers  LMBYTS #1460  Jason Newland  12th October 2025

(music) (10 hours) Sunday’s papers  LMBYTS #1460  Jason Newland  12th October 2025

(no music) Sunday’s papers  LMBYTS #1460  Jason Newland  12th October 2025

(no music) (10 hours) Sunday’s papers  LMBYTS #1460  Jason Newland  12th October 2025

A confrontational character monologue from Pancakes, No Syrup, capturing Chanel’s razor-sharp confidence, emotional tension, and unfiltered truth-telling. Perfect for dramatic edits, BookTok reactions, and character-driven storytelling playlists.

I Said What I Said -- Chanel's Stance

Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes. These recordings are NOT a replacement for professional medical treatment. Get permission from your medical specialist before listening to any hypnosis recording or watching any hypnosis videos.

I am a growing poet/spoken word artist. Giving the world front row seats to my world.. Sit back and enjoy the show..HOLD THE TOMATOES PLEASE!!!

New tracks tagged #monologue,