The Wagatha Song

Never wag a finger at a WAG,
Or through the courts they surly you will drag;
In emails or in letters, never speak about your betters;
On Twitter, never let them see you brag!

And if the Sun should send a Mail to you;
Don’t Express opinions like you do!
For a WAG she keeps her venom 
In her house the size of Blenheim
With the football shirts, the Red, the White or Blue!

Chorus
And down at the Old Bailey, they will have their day, 
While the men in wigs will calculate the extra pay;
And the Judge whose wig is whiter than the lightest grey,
Will mutter ‘My Sweet Jaysus!’ though he doesn’t pray.

And the WAGs will burn the money that their strikers make;
They’ll be longing for the cameras to get that take 
To beam it round the world, just for their beauty’s sake —
While the red tops get their copy, ‘cause they’re on the make.

Never put the finger on a Wag
Nor speculate on when their goods might sag!
For they’ll get you in the end,
Though you think you’re their best friend,
You could end up as a bankrupt or a lag!

Chorus
For down at the Old Bailey, they will have their day, 
While the men in wigs will calculate the extra pay;
And the Judge whose wig is whiter than the lightest grey,
Will mutter ‘My Sweet Jaysus!’ though he doesn’t pray.

The Wagatha Song

Murder, mystery and majesty combine in this new Special Edition hardback of the Queen of Crime's very best short stories set in London. 

 Agatha Christie is recognized throughout the world as the writer of remarkable country house mysteries and ingenious murders set in faraway countries. Yet many of her books and stories were set in the city she new best and for many years called home: London.

From Poirot's flat in Whitehaven Mansions to Scotland Yard, the Old Bailey to Harley Street, Lyons Tea Rooms to the Savoy, Paddington Station to the London Underground, Agatha Christie knew and loved London, and mined it for its rich seam of storytelling opportunities.

100 years after the first publication of 'Traitor Hands', the short story that became 'Witness for the Prosecution', this collection includes this original thriller, along with eleven other London mysteries featuring all the Christie faithfuls: Hercule Poirot, Miss Marple, Tommy and Tuppence, Harley Quin, Parker Pyne and Ariadne Oliver.

Join Christie’s iconic characters on their adventures around London:

The Affair at the Victory Ball

The Tuesday Night Club

The Case of the Discontented Soldier

The Adventure of the Clapham Cook

Traitor Hands

A Fairy in the Flat

The Kidnapped Prime Minister

The Listerdale Mystery

The Case of the Caretaker

The Lonely God

The Sign in the Sky

The Adventure of the Cheap Flat

Capital Christie: Twelve London Mysteries, By Agatha Christie, Read by Judith Boyd, Hugh Fraser, Christopher Lee, Ciaran Saward, Juliet Stevenson and David Suchet

Publishers of award-winning fiction and non-fiction audiobooks for adults and children. Listen to exclusive clips from our books and free audioook extracts here on Soundcloud.

New tracks tagged #old bailey