Old Patterns

prod @kggn @ginsengxx

leave me alone
just like everyone else does
i cant feel my bones
i dont really care if i overdose

i dont feel home
wanna throw up its too much
but i cant go
ill look half dead when i show up

i dont wanna grow up
i just wanna die you keep me alive
i dont wanna fly home
really fucking hate saying goodbye

really dont hate me
i was sure i saw it in your eyes
really cant blame you
sorry im so hard to trust

ill let myself out
dont try to help me
want to erase you
want to erase me
cant se my feelings
nothing has meaning
love to stop breathing
high on the ceiling

push ill stop pulling
im gone im going
im always lower
theres nothing growing
whats wrong with knowing
but when the phone rings
and i see ur name
everythings glowing

half dead prod. kuru & ginseng

This song is a haunting and introspective exploration of the darker aspects of human nature and relationships. The lyrics weave a narrative of lost love, broken promises, and the devastating consequences of succumbing to darkness and despair. 

Through vivid imagery and metaphors, the song paints a picture of a world where truth and hope are elusive, and the shadows of doubt and fear creep in. The chorus drives home the theme of falling back into old patterns of behavior, trapped in a maze of echoes and broken promises. 

The song's atmospheric and emotive soundscapes evoke a sense of longing and desperation, as she grapples with the shattered remains of love and trust. The overall mood is one of melancholy and introspection, inviting listeners to reflect on their own experiences of heartbreak and darkness.


LYRICS: 

[Verse 1]
Shadows creep beneath our dawn
Whispered lies where truth had flown
Heartbeats pound in jagged tone
Lost the light I thought was known 

[Chorus]
You fall back to your darkened ways
Echoes twist in haunted maze
Promises are ghostly haze
You fall back break love's embrace 

[Verse 2]
Eyes that once held cosmic spark
Now just mirrors to the dark
Broken vows under the ark
Soul's drift far we’ve missed the mark 

[Bridge]
Chains of doubt they start to cling
Every lie a shattered wing
Silent screams in stillness ring
Faith and trust a shattered thing 

[Chorus]
You fall back to your darkened ways
Echoes twist in haunted maze
Promises are ghostly haze
You fall back break love's embrace 

[Verse 3]
Crimson tears on porcelain skin
Battles fought you can not win
All the scars drawn deep within
Empty void where hope had been 



Eclipse of Despair

Songwriting has been a lifelong passion for me, dating back to elementary school when I first began crafting stories, poems, and eventually lyrics. As a former drummer in various bands, I always relied on others to bring my words to life musically. However, after a long hiatus from drumming, I decided to take the leap and learn to compose music to accompany my lyrics. Through classes and dedication, I've embarked on a new journey, breathing fresh life into old lyrics and penning new ones. You'll find a mix of older and newer works here, for the lyrics. 

Music has been a part of me for as long as I can remember. One of my earliest memories is being completely entranced by 'The Little Drummer Boy' as a very young child. There was something about the rhythm and the melody that just captivated me. I must have played it a thousand times, wearing the record out, and from that moment on, I was hooked. I knew I wanted to be a drummer, and to create that magic for others. 

But I was too young then, and of course I couldn't afford a drum set just yet. So, I turned to writing as a way to express myself. As I mentioned above, I started with stories, then poems, and eventually, lyrics. I found that writing was not only a way to tap into my creativity, but also a way to process my emotions and experiences. 

As I grew older, my love for music only deepened. I realized that music has this incredible power to transport us to different times and places, to evoke emotions and memories that we thought were long forgotten. It's a universal language that can bring people together like nothing else can. 

For me, writing lyrics is a cathartic experience. It's a way for me to tap into my emotions, to process the world around me, and to create something that I hope will resonate with others. And when I hear my words come to life in a song, it's truly magical. It's a feeling that never gets old, and it's what keeps me coming back to music time and time again. 

I love many genres of music and artists of many genres. And if you listen to some of my songs, you will find that I like to make songs of different genres as well as mix different genres into each song. One of my all-time favorite bands is Evanescence, and I have made a lot of songs where I have tried my best to emulate that sound. 

Now, I have recently started experimenting with new sounds. I never heard of glitch beats before I took music classes, and now I'm fascinated with the sound, so I have been experimenting with glitch beats recently. 

I hope you enjoy some of my songs. And thanks so much to everyone who has been listening so far. I truly appreciate it. I welcome constructive feedback to help me grow as an artist, and I appreciate your support. ❤️

BTW If you follow me, I will ALWAYS follow back. If I like your music, I will follow you, but if you don't follow me back within a week or two, I will unfollow you most of the time. The same goes if I see someone listening to my music, I WILL follow them, however, if they don't follow back within a week or two, I'll unfollow them.  😘

New tracks tagged #old patterns