this isn't really anything new for me in terms of subject matter, but i think it's one of the most satisfyingly concise ways i've communicated my outlook.

lyrics:

with a self like this, who needs enemies?
i encourage you to do as you please
can’t blame you for it
still hate you for it

if i were another, doubt i’d care about me either
always a cynic, sick of these believers
same old story
getting boring

i shouldn’t imagine what could’ve been
big ideas don’t happen in reality
the truth will piss you off more than it sets you free
a void at the end of the tunnel is all i see

not a good person, i’m just not a sociopath
can’t depend on me when it’s getting bad
nothing special
don’t say i’m special

if i could be loved maybe i could be good but
the ones who rejected me probably dodged a bullet
so forgettable
whole life regretful

i shouldn’t imagine what could’ve been
big ideas don’t happen in reality
the truth will piss you off more than it sets you free
a void at the end of the tunnel is all i see...

with a self like this, who needs enemies?
i encourage you to do as you please
can’t blame you for it
still hate you for it

Download

all i see

this is a brutally honest account of what i've felt toward my grandmother while living with her and witnessing the progression of her dementia.

lyrics:

another day, another crumb of sanity falling away
a portrait deconstructed to drawings of shapes
ashamed to be a burden
yet the more you try to lift it the more that it weighs

and as the floor of your dignity crumbles
all you can do is desperately cling
to control of things you no longer understand

i sit at a distance to watch as you fumble
anxious and clueless
i don’t think i can ever forgive you for making me who i am

scared to leave my bed lest i touch what’s around me
sometimes i wonder, what would you do if you found me
after i acted on my ideation? would you forget it later?
would the pain in the world become lesser or greater?
your daughter who birthed me, well, it’s tempting to hate her
for that alone, but can i really blame her?
just doing what humans are made to and trying to seem
like a valid excuse for a parent to me
i suppose i relate to her failure
to care for me alone and cater
to needs disregarded at leisure
i want to be kinder, it’s just really a shame that
you wear me down till my skin’s like paper
always thought boundaries made me ungrateful
and claimed you’re the one out of us with empathy
the only shared feeling between you and me
is the weight of life’s futility
as we mutually crave euthanasia

they say don’t say that
but isn’t it that bad?
the role in caring i play every day
it’s so draining maintaining the act

and when you finally pass
will i even feel sad?
will i suddenly feel the unconditional love
that apparently families have?

will i be relieved or maybe envy you that day?
will i be sure of thoughts considered unthinkable to say?
that it’s what you deserve and i mean that in the kindest way
i see the cruelty in keeping you here just to suffer another day

futility

hopeless baby i now find pleasure in money
so i guess you can say 
i’m my mothers daughter 

hopeless baby i know what i said 
but you’re not where i been 
but i guess you can say 
i’m my mother daughter 

she birthed her purity
only to get older and grow as dirty 
i guess we’re always performing 
but that’s where you find luxury 


bruises polished into diamonds 
i’m the only shining star they will see


if you can do this all for free and get nothing
then why can’t i do this all for me 
when you know all i wanna be is something 


so violent and pretty

hopeless baby

Album: you helped me write my s------ n---

A quiet document of moments that weren’t supposed to last—you helped me write my s------ n--- is a short, intimate album of three songs and a final spoken word poem. It sits somewhere between memory and unfinished letters, a soft place for the things we don’t say out loud.

The opener, "i hope it kills me," loops a slow, hypnotic guitar phrase—four alternating notes, picked in threes. As it swells halfway through, an acoustic guitar shadows the same pattern while a faint hissing distortion creeps in, like something breaking the surface.

"why can't i just rot" follows with a more urgent tempo. Acoustic guitar leads again, joined by piano and a fragile synth line that pulses beneath everything like a heart too aware of itself.

"what if there's no heaven?" is stripped raw. Played in one take, the acoustic guitar stumbles a little, but that imperfection holds a kind of truth—like someone trying to hold it together while quietly falling apart.

The final track, "but you didn’t know," is a spoken word poem. Unadorned and plainspoken, it lands like the last line of a letter never meant to be read.

This isn’t a polished record, and it doesn’t want to be. It’s something left behind, maybe on purpose. It’s for late nights, for headphones, for the moments when silence feels too loud.

Why can't i just rot

what if there's no heaven?

Oh, my piggytales. Sometimes I find myself lost in thoughts of the past or just vivid images of what could’ve been. I used to run around with pigtails, but I had to grow out of that. Don’t we all, eventually?

Piggytales

we're standing on the precipice. the world will never be the same

The Safety - End of the World

The Safety - Stretching the Limit

cellphone

nAbe

𝚠𝚎 𝚠𝚛𝚒𝚝𝚎 𝚜𝚘𝚗𝚐𝚜 𝚝𝚘 𝚐𝚎𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚝𝚑𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑 𝚒𝚝 
♡
https://super-capacity.com/thesfaety-eotw.OIS

brooklyn. i like punk, skateboarding, almendrados, adidas and The Nets.

You can make me feel good, so come up, I'm not expensive

natural born loser who makes electronica that integrates varying amounts of ambient, wave, dnb, breakcore, bedroom pop, trip-hop, digicore, and whatever else it could be labelled, underpinned by a distinct ear for melody, melancholy, and dreamlike atmosphere.

i also offer affordable mastering! my prices:
£15/single
£45/EP
£75/album

Suicidal Blues is the solo project of a Hull-based musician making noise out of feeling – not just emotion, but the kind that crashes, hisses, and won't leave quietly. It's the raw sound of sadness, confusion, moments of clarity, and a defiant, untrusting hope. Blending noise rock, experimental indie, and emo, the music isn't about perfection; it's about being deeply human and utterly imperfect.
Most tracks are caught in a single take, reflecting an urgent desire to capture the emotional moment before it fades. Expect thick, saturated guitars and layered reverb creating flawed, full soundscapes. Every lyric is chosen carefully, often obscured in the mix – a way of being honest while protecting the most vulnerable parts. Themes of loneliness, entrapment, and emotional contradiction run deep. This is music made to understand feelings that are too loud to ignore, and hopefully, to help others do the same.

New tracks tagged #sadcore