they care ‘bout everyone but me,
scroll right past, like i’m not even breathin’
ghost in the walls with a cracked TV screen
watchin’ her smile like i never had meanin’

drunk off rejection, high off regret
left me on read, now i talk to the dead
posted her pics like “i’m so in love”
while i rot on my mattress, coughin’ up dust

they care for everyone but me 
they look at her, then look through me
i scream, they laugh, it’s just routine
feelin’ like a glitch in their new movie

“u good?” texts from people that dipped
sayin’ “u changed” when they all just flipped
i gave too much, now i’m too damn numb
guess love dies young when ur not that fun

ur the new boy got that softboy charm
i got tattoos and a throat full of harm
he buys her flowers, i ruin the vibe
tryna breathe slow while i bleed on live

they say “heal,” but it don’t sound right
when the only peace i know’s goodnight
and maybe i’m just too obsessed
but at least i ain’t fake like the rest

they care for everyone but me
they love her soft, they hate me deep
i get the blame, they get to leave
i rot in rooms where no one sleeps

everyone but me gets grace
everyone but me finds place
i’m just the fuck-up in their prayers
i’m just the shadow under stairs

everyone but me

im still waiting..

staring at the ceiling, feels safer than your eyes
you always found a reason to dress up all your lies
i’m choking on apologies you never wanna hear
you left me with the silence, now it’s all i fear


every time i tried to fix it, i just made it worse
maybe i was always broken, always fucking cursed

it’s probably my fault anyways
you got sick of all my deadweight
if i disappear, would you even care?
or would you just smile while i’m not there?

i’m tired of pretending i’m worth anything at all
you watched me crumble slowly, never tried to call
maybe i deserved it, maybe i’m to blame
i’m nothing but a burden you were too polite to name

its probably my fault anyways

performed by: blindbylain

produced by: grayskies

Farewell

fuck national girlfriend day 

you said you love me
but you never cared
you said you’d save me
but you were never there
you watched me bleed out
but you never cared
cut me open just to
say it’s not fair

you held me close
but you never cared
kissed me soft
while you stripped me bare
said i’m your everything
but you never cared
left my soul
hanging mid-air

you called me home
but you never cared
dug the grave
and said, “don’t be scared”
you lit the match
but you never cared
burned me alive
just to see who stared

all that remains is the blood on my hands when I killed you

thank u for nothing October, drops in two months yall.

Every moment I be thinkin’ of you
Like a sick little dog, like I’m missin’ a screw
Bite my lip ‘til it bleeds just to feel somethin’ true
You moved on, I just rot in the shade of your view

Put a hole in my chest with the shit that you said
Now I carry your words like a gun to my head
Used to sleep on the phone, now I scream at the wall
You grew wings, I grew mold—I just pray for the fall

You keep your secrets locked behind your pretty teeth
I keep mine in pills I swallow when I can’t breathe
You loved me like a knife loves a warm soft gut
Now I’m bleedin’ out slow, still sayin’, “so what?”

Fuck your closure, fuck talkin’ it all out
You left, now my love’s just a scream and a shout
Tore me open like a goddamn gift
Then tossed my soul in the trash, sayin’ “that’s it”

I hate that I still want you to care
Wrote your name in the dust, now it’s floatin’ in air
I talk to the mirror like it’s you in there
But it never talks back, just stares and stares

Tie a noose with your favorite song
Play it backwards while I’m gone
Every lie you fed, I ate
Now I’m hollow, now I fucking hate

cut my tongue out, maybe then i’ll shut up

Hate my fuckin’ face, wanna tear my skin off
Wake up feelin’ sick, every dream gets pissed on
Every bitch I touch gets hurt, then dipped on
Smile while I’m bleeding out, that’s my sick song
Three days up, still twitch like a fiend
Everything I love ends up obscene
Heart’s been rotting since I turned sixteen
If I don’t cut deep, then I can’t feel a thing

Black truck, but my soul’s even blacker
Your face on a shirt, I’m a backstabber
Only call me when you need a disaster
I’m the fuck-up that you wish died faster
No sleep, eyes red like a needle
Five missed calls, still I’m not legal
You beg me please, but I’m still not peaceful
Broke my own heart just to watch it be lethal

New tracks tagged #saintzofsorrow