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Bugle Season 2

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Hello listeners,

If, like today's questioneer Paul, you want to allow a cool breeze to circulate around your nethers, but without the hazard of being charged with indecent exposure, we recommend you wear <a href="http://www.cafepress.com/answermethis.182058479" target="_blank">one of these</a> around the house. The pockets are really useful too, for carrying cooling ice-packs and emergency underpants lest you receive an unexpected guest.

Also useful, though providing no modesty coverage, is Answer Me This! Episode 265, in which we discuss matters including:

Amazon
Amazons' boobs
Amazon's Eye
penile hygiene
straitjackets 
Dire Straits
(ham)burgers
tartar vs. tartare sauce vs. the Tatars
chips and gravy vs. poutine
political speech spoilers
<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Bridge_(2006_documentary_film)" target="_blank">The Bridge</a>
Jeff Bezos
and
the Midlands swing vote.

Plus: Olly thinks one of the world's biggest online retailers caters especially to his ego; Helen improves upon Ed Miliband's cigarette packet zingers; and Martin the Sound Man explains why Sylvia Plath ate her mince raw.

In this week's Bit of Crap on the App, which is available for <a href="http://tinyurl.com/amtapp" target="blank">iDevices</a> and <a href="http://tinyurl.com/androidAMT" target="blank">Android</a>, we come up with a more fitting name for the Shakespeare play that so nettled Olly in <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/episode264" target="_blank">last week's episode</a>. Look out for a production of Much Ado About Vagina at an outdoor theatre near you.

Our podcast would be much ado about nothing without your <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/questions" target="_blank">QUESTIONS</a>, so please send them to us: leave voicemails on the Question Line (call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis) and send emails to <a href="mailto:answermethispodcast@googlemail.com">answermethispodcast@googlemail.com</a>.

See you next Thursday,

Helen &amp; Olly

*** AMT265 Child-Friendly Rating: 30%. Mention of ripe topics including boobs, suicide, politics, fellatio. A few swear-bombs. ***

PS Thanks to <a href="http://incompetech.com" target="_blank">Kevin McLeod</a> for music, as well as the <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/players/" target="_blank">AMT Players</a> as usual.

<h5 style="text-align:center;">• <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/albums" target="blank">ALBUMS</a> • <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/listen" target="blank">CLASSIC EPISODES</a> • <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/book" target="blank">BOOK</a> • <a href="http://tinyurl.com/iTunesAMT" target="blank">iTUNES</a> • <a href="http://tinyurl.com/amtsoundcloud" target="blank">SOUNDCLOUD</a> • <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/faq/" target="blank">FAQ</a> •
<a href="http://tinyurl.com/AMTapp" target="blank">iPHONE APP</a> • <a href="http://tinyurl.com/AMTdroid" target="blank">ANDROID APP</a> • <a href="http://www.facebook.com/answermethis" target="blank">FACEBOOK</a> • <a href="http://twitter.com/helenandolly" target="blank">TWITTER</a> • <a href="http://youtube.com/helenandolly" target="blank">YOUTUBE</a> • <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/superstore/" target="blank">MERCH</a> </h5>

AMT265: Amazon, Straitjackets and Chips with Gravy - 1 August 2013

Today we learn why all those people believe Elvis to be alive, whereas they don't feign such confidence over the likes of, say, Janis Joplin, Robert Johnson, Mozart... Put on your white jumpsuit and conspiracy theorising hat, and get stuck into Answer Me This! Episode 271, in which we also ponder:

In which we also ponder:

office nemeses
servants
panpipes
table tennis bats
cupcake wars (interpersonal ones, not the <a href="http://www.foodnetwork.com/cupcake-wars/index.html" target="_blank">tv show of the same name</a>)
Red Or Black vs Ant Or Dec
the parliamentary mace vs Geoff Hoon
The Flaming Et Cetera
and
the National Enquirer.

Furthermore! Of course Olly loves the sound of his own voice, but only in solitude; sure, Helen can bake, but it's nothing really (on the other hand, talking shit every week is high art); and Martin the Sound Man posits that not only is Elvis not alive now, he was also not alive during most of his life. You still following?

In this week's Bit of Crap on the App (available for <a href="http://tinyurl.com/amtapp" target="blank">iDevices</a> or <a href="http://tinyurl.com/androidAMT" target="blank">Android</a>) Helen wonders how a duck foetus ends up in a glass of champagne on a tasting menu - and moreover why anybody would think that is a suitable first date drink.

Also not suitable for a first date, but perfectly suitable for most other times, is sending us your <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/questions" target="_blank">QUESTIONS</a>: leave voicemails on the Question Line (call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis) and send emails to <a href="mailto:answermethispodcast@googlemail.com">answermethispodcast@googlemail.com</a>.

See you next Thursday,

Helen &amp; Olly

*** AMT271 Child-Friendly Rating: 88%. Opens with an email about Consenting Adults' Bedsports, but other than that, very clean, even swear-wise. ***

<h5 style="text-align:center;">• <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/albums" target="blank">ALBUMS</a> • <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/listen" target="blank">CLASSIC EPISODES</a> • <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/book" target="blank">BOOK</a> • <a href="http://tinyurl.com/iTunesAMT" target="blank">iTUNES</a> • <a href="http://tinyurl.com/amtsoundcloud" target="blank">SOUNDCLOUD</a> • <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/faq/" target="blank">FAQ</a> •
<a href="http://tinyurl.com/AMTapp" target="blank">iPHONE APP</a> • <a href="http://tinyurl.com/AMTdroid" target="blank">ANDROID APP</a> • <a href="http://www.facebook.com/answermethis" target="blank">FACEBOOK</a> • <a href="http://twitter.com/helenandolly" target="blank">TWITTER</a> • <a href="http://youtube.com/helenandolly" target="blank">YOUTUBE</a> • <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/superstore/" target="blank">MERCH</a> </h5>

AMT271: Elvis Lives (or doesn't), Cupcake Wars and the Parliamentary Mace - 12 September 2013

Andy and John look at the disparity in wealth in the US, report from the Op-Ed wars, and are joined by a comfortably racist blast from the past

Bugle 247 - Mind The Gap!

Andy and John have the latest on the collapse of civilisation in the US, as well as corruption updates from India and Italy

Bugle 248 - Anarchy in the USA

Andy and John provide more evidence for the complete collapse of the USA, discuss the end of Sachin Tendulkar, reveal that Brazil is run by clowns and psychopaths and get some passive aggressive love/abuse in an email

Bugle 249 - America stands that little bit smaller

As Halloween approaches, in Answer Me This! Episode 276 we wonder how it is that in films, adorable little girls become UTTERLY TERRIFYING. We also wonder about:


<a href="http://www.cineworld.co.uk/cinemas/61?WT.srch=1&amp;gclid=CPah-bTtrroCFWTHtAodyWwAiQ" target="_blank">Cineworld Stevenage</a>
Stars in their Eyes
the most tree-filled city in Europe
pound shops
Lisa Stansfield
working night shifts
<a href="http://www.cadbury.co.uk/products/Freddo-2407?p=2407" target="_blank">Freddo bars</a>
Bon Jovi vs Dr Alban
Midlands canals vs Venetian canals
the Clee Hills vs the Urals
the Torquay Eye
Chinese restaurants
Stoptober, Movember and Dickember
and
balti.

Plus: Olly gets busy with the passover plate; you can sponsor Helen next time she's buying posh chocolate; and Martin the Sound Man gets a whole question about his birthplace, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxZ1xn2ml10">Birmingham</a>! Beware: the Brummie beast is unleashed...

In this week's Bit of Crap on the App (available for <a href="http://tinyurl.com/amtapp" target="blank">iDevices</a>, <a href="http://tinyurl.com/androidAMT" target="blank">Android</a> and <a href="http://apps.microsoft.com/windows/en-gb/app/answer-me-this/4a39a286-b630-4e2b-9866-8f2a12fd3508" target="_blank">Windows</a>) we tackle a question from Ali from Cambridge, who after her recent break-up is gripped by the urge to chop her hair off. Classic technique, Ali.

We do want your whelming facts about Birmingham, or even your own hometown, but most of all we want your <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/questions" target="_blank">QUESTIONS</a>: leave voicemails on the Question Line (call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis) and send emails to <a href="mailto:answermethispodcast@googlemail.com">answermethispodcast@googlemail.com</a>.

See you next Thursday,

Helen &amp; Olly

*** AMT276 Child-Friendly Rating: 87%. A couple of swears, though the strongest are quoting a child, Regan in The Exorcist. ***

<h5 style="text-align:center;">• <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/albums" target="blank">ALBUMS</a> • <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/listen" target="blank">CLASSIC EPISODES</a> • <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/book" target="blank">BOOK</a> • <a href="http://tinyurl.com/iTunesAMT" target="blank">iTUNES</a> • <a href="http://tinyurl.com/amtsoundcloud" target="blank">SOUNDCLOUD</a> • <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/faq/" target="blank">FAQ</a> •
<a href="http://tinyurl.com/AMTapp" target="blank">iPHONE APP</a> • <a href="http://tinyurl.com/AMTdroid" target="blank">ANDROID APP</a> • <a href="http://www.facebook.com/answermethis" target="blank">FACEBOOK</a> • <a href="http://twitter.com/helenandolly" target="blank">TWITTER</a> • <a href="http://youtube.com/helenandolly" target="blank">YOUTUBE</a> • <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/superstore/" target="blank">MERCH</a> </h5>

AMT276: Pound Shops, Movember and Facts About Birmingham - 24 October 2013

...is about IT glitches with the launch of Obamacare. 

Plus why spying would have saved Jesus, Spain plans to jail all of the USA, church wangs and Vatican cricket. 

Happy 250 Buglers!

Bugle 250 - No one is madder than Obama...

A man in Russia has nailed his testicles to Russia, the British conservative party has hidden the internet, and The Bugle raids BBC Radio 1. 

Bugle 251 - Nailing the truth to the floor

Hollande woos another mistress, World Cup winners make better dates and is George Clooney a Nazi?

Bugle 260 - International Love Triangle

In response to <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/episode284/" target="_blank">AMT284</a>, the first few minutes of Answer Me This! Episode 285 are SO exciting, you should listen RIGHT NOW - though do keep listening beyond the first few minutes, to hear about:

But do carry on listening beyond the first few minutes, to hear about:

'<a href="http://youtu.be/VV1XWJN3nJo" target="_blank">Torn</a>' by Natalie Imbruglia vs '<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V1SH1YdITDI" target="_blank">Torn</a>' by Ednaswap
<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fXLYFQef7O8" target="_blank">Randy Newman</a> vs <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3gxOlrWoNVg" target="_blank">Tom Jones</a>
the Recycle Bin vs Trash
rawl plugs vs wall plugs
Lizzy Yarnold
Magic FM
saloon doors
Mini Babybel
'<a href="http://youtu.be/gdmHHoI9beM" target="_blank">Hazard</a>' by Richard Marx
the face of fistula
and
magnolia paint.

Plus, there's a manliness contest between Olly and Martin the Sound Man. Which of these opposite-of-Titans is the least masculine? It's a VERY close contest. Like a boxing match between a wet lettuce leaf and a fluffy sock.

There's double Crap on the App this week, as Olly chooses chateaubriand over speakeasies (whither the gastrospeakeasy?), then says gardening's for girls, even though he's got a grow-your-own Alan Titchmarsh. Fire up the app on your <a href="http://tinyurl.com/amtapp" target="blank">iDevices</a>, <a href="http://tinyurl.com/androidAMT" target="blank">Android</a> and <a href="http://apps.microsoft.com/windows/en-gb/app/answer-me-this/4a39a286-b630-4e2b-9866-8f2a12fd3508" target="_blank">Windows</a> gadgetry.

Fire your <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/questions" target="_blank">QUESTIONS</a> to the Question Line (call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis) and our inbox via <a href="mailto:answermethispodcast@googlemail.com">answermethispodcast@googlemail.com</a>.

Also fire up <a href="http://squarespace.com" target="_blank">Squarespace.com</a>, who have not only given us money to make this episode but are also giving YOU a 10% discount off their services for a whole year if you use the code answer3.

Back in a fortnight!

Helen &amp; Olly

*** AMT285 Child-Friendly Rating: 52%. The topics aren't unsuitable, but two f-bombs are detonated in the first ten minutes. Miscellanous other swears appear towards the end, when discussing the vile names Martin the Sound Man gives to computer things. So blame Martin for the defilement of your children if they hear this episode. ***

<h5 style="text-align:center;">• <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/albums" target="blank">ALBUMS</a> • <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/classic" target="blank">CLASSIC EPISODES</a> • <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/book" target="blank">BOOK</a> • <a href="http://tinyurl.com/iTunesAMT" target="blank">iTUNES</a> • <a href="http://tinyurl.com/amtsoundcloud" target="blank">SOUNDCLOUD</a> • <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/faq/" target="blank">FAQ</a> •
<a href="http://tinyurl.com/AMTapp" target="blank">iPHONE APP</a> • <a href="http://tinyurl.com/AMTdroid" target="blank">ANDROID APP</a> • <a href="http://www.facebook.com/answermethis" target="blank">FACEBOOK</a> • <a href="http://twitter.com/helenandolly" target="blank">TWITTER</a> • <a href="http://youtube.com/helenandolly" target="blank">YOUTUBE</a> • <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/superstore/" target="blank">MERCH</a> </h5>

AMT285: Saloons, Natalie Imbruglia, and Magnolia - 13 March 2014

Andy and John discuss the global news reaction to some horrific stories

Bugle 264 - Making nothing out of something

RHLSTP #39: Greg Davies - Ian Gunpowder. Richard chats with his audience and manages to secure himself a TV writing job, as well as marvel at his once IT heavy, bearded male audience being replaced by people who might actually have had sex. Don't worry, the nerds are still there and they're still the best! This week's guest is very tall and has never been told that before, it's sexually-charged comedian and actor Greg Davies. They converse about how W G Grace upstaged Greg's sister's wedding, how Guy Fawkes died and whether he'd welcome a time-travelling penis, how Greg embarrassed himself in front of Rik Mayall in a supermarket and bum-based encounters with doctors. It's raucous and very funny. This is one that might be worth paying the £3.50 to see on video. Not only does Greg have some amazing facial reactions, but Richard carries out one of the dirtybritcom confession fantasies on him. It's very, very sexy.

To buy a video download pass for this whole series of RHLSTP please go to www.gofasterstripe.com/rhlstp5. If you'd prefer just to make a donation to help us keep making these then you can buy a 'I Paid a Pound!' or a 'I Paid More than a Pound' badge at the same address. If you'd like to make a regular donation then you can also pay whatever amount you wish monthly. All this money will go back into making more internet content. If you all gave us a pound we could do some amazing stuff. Also check out The Meaning Of Life show, it's available as a free audio on iTunes and the British Comedy Guide, a free video on www.vimeo.com/channels/rhmol or you can buy much longer versions of the show either on audio or video at www.gofasterstripe.com/rhmol

http://www.comedy.co.uk/podcasts/richard_herring_lst_podcast/

Richard Herring's Leicester Square Theatre Podcast - Episode 39 - Greg Davies

Hello! You still have one day to catch the <a href="http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b03zdkk5" target="_blank">first half</a> of our <a href="http://t.co/4P3pPTJnmd" target="_blank">Radio 4 documentary to celebrate the tenth anniversary of the word 'podcast'</a>. The second episode airs 11am tomorrow, Friday 11th April, and features money-making from <a href="http://99percentinvisible.org" target="_blank">Roman Mars</a>, baby-making from <a href="http://maximumfun.org/shows/one-bad-mother" target="_blank">Theresa Thorn</a>, and something absolutely puke-making from <a href="http://www.keithandthegirl.com/" target="_blank">Keith and the Girl</a>.

So please do listen to that, and also to Answer Me This! Episode 287, in which we contemplate such topics as:

the Man from Del Monte
Tony Benn's chair
catnip
human statues
snooze buttons
kissing gates
Miffy vs Hello Kitty 
Telford vs Jamaica
CTRL+V vs CTRL+C
pedantry with partners
<a href="http://www.artbox.co.uk/" target="_blank">Artbox</a>
netiquette
<a href="http://www.foapom.com/pageant-of-the-masters/" target="_blank">The Pageant of the Masters</a>
and 
<a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/episode177" target="_blank">listener Jessy's missing colon, part II</a>

Plus: Olly details the specifications for choosing his new alarm clock, so set your own alarm clock to jolt you back into consciousness afterwards; Helen comes up with a Doctor Who reboot for Matt Smith and an amazing sit- for a sitcom, so TV commissioners, prepare a bucket of cash and call her in for a meeting; and Martin the Sound Man won't let you through a gate until you give him a little somethin-somethin. APPROACH WITH CAUTION.

Today's Bit of Crap on the App, Helen gets doorbell envy. To hear all about that grievous condition, push the button on your <a href="http://tinyurl.com/amtapp" target="blank">iDevices</a>, <a href="http://tinyurl.com/androidAMT" target="blank">Android</a> or <a href="http://apps.microsoft.com/windows/en-gb/app/answer-me-this/4a39a286-b630-4e2b-9866-8f2a12fd3508" target="_blank">Windows</a> gadgets.

No need to envy other people's nice websites - now you can build your own through <a href="http://squarespace.com" target="_blank">Squarespace.com</a>, who not only kindly funded today's show, but are also offering you a 10% discount off their services for a whole year if you use the code answer. We used Squarespace to build <a href="http://answermethisstore.com" target="_blank">answermethisstore.com</a> and it was even easier to set up shop than it is to set up <a href="http://www.argos.co.uk/static/Product/partNumber/3892617.htm" target="_blank">this shop</a>.

Keep us in business by sending in your questions: call the Question Line (call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis) or email <a href="mailto:answermethispodcast@googlemail.com">answermethispodcast@googlemail.com</a>.

Back in a fortnight,

Helen &amp; Olly

PS Get well soon, Dave from Smethwick!

*** AMT287 Child-Friendly Rating: 95%. ***
No unsuitable content, aside from the demystification of Hello Kitty. An F-bomb is detonated during the discussion of keyboard shortcuts, but thanks to the subject matter, there's no way your kids will be paying attention.

<h5 style="text-align:center;">• <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/albums" target="blank">ALBUMS</a> • <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/classic" target="blank">CLASSIC EPISODES</a> • <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/book" target="blank">BOOK</a> • <a href="http://tinyurl.com/iTunesAMT" target="blank">iTUNES</a> • <a href="http://tinyurl.com/amtsoundcloud" target="blank">SOUNDCLOUD</a> • <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/faq/" target="blank">FAQ</a> •
<a href="http://tinyurl.com/AMTapp" target="blank">iPHONE APP</a> • <a href="http://tinyurl.com/AMTdroid" target="blank">ANDROID APP</a> • <a href="http://www.facebook.com/answermethis" target="blank">FACEBOOK</a> • <a href="http://twitter.com/helenandolly" target="blank">TWITTER</a> • <a href="http://youtube.com/helenandolly" target="blank">YOUTUBE</a> • <a href="http://answermethispodcast.com/superstore/" target="blank">MERCH</a> </h5>

AMT287: Hello Kitty, Snooze Buttons and Human Statues - 10 April 2014

The world meets again to discuss the environment, and this time it has beards! Famous people with beards!

Bugle 274 - Beard means business

Andy shakes the satire stick at 4Chan, Muddy Waters and Scotland.

More Satirist for hire

While Ebola continues to be quite a nuisance, Brazil weighs up the importance of footballers as an election draws nearer and The Bugle leaks some smoking hot media featuring your favourite celebrities recorded au naturale. 

Bugle 275 The Ebola Tombola

What's happening in Britain? Why are white men singing reggae songs about immigration?

Bugle 276 - Calypso bad

Andy and John celebrate daredevils of the world. Warning, this show is one of 'those' ones, with the 'moments'.

Bugle 277 - Wow! Why?

Andy and John discuss the latest on the CIA and their 'aggressive quizzing'.

Bugle 281 - One star review

Finally, Andy and John put the best of the worst against eachother in a battle of international dickery

Bugle 282 - Twas the Dick before Christmas

A show dedicated to all the people of the world who aren't arseholes. Happy 2015!

Bugle 283 - #JeSuisCharlie

http://www.gofundme.com/this-is-michelle

Unity March, Oscars, Birmingham, Orthodox censors.

Bugle 284 - Too Hot For Print

World leaders head to Davos, but the big question has to be asked... where's Bono?

You can donate to Michelle's fund here: www.gofundme.com/this-is-michelle

Bugle 285 - Where's Bono?

Greece elects a new leader and Europe freaks out.

Bugle 286 - Greekonomics

The best/worst of Februarys gone by and an exclusive interview with Michelle.

You can still help Michelle here: http://www.gofundme.com/this-is-michelle

Bonus Bugle - Michelle & famous Februarys

Polar Bears are having a bad time. Here's how bad...

Bugle 288 - Bear Sick

The Bugle is the ultimate pan-global audio home of international satire. The show is a weekly eruption of comedic comment about the world’s most, and least, important news stories.