   While scouring the remnants of a once bustling shopping center for fossilized vinyl album relics, I heard a faint, phlegmatic voice arise out of a pile of discarded mannequins crying out "Help, help, get me out of this pile of @#$% mannequins and I will owe you one!"  This is how I first met Rowena Blankenship Spudwelder IV, modern day prophetess and heir to a line of incontinence products, whose favorite song is "Row your boat" and favorite hobby is welding metallic potato heads oddly enough.
   After helping her out of the pile, haggard and disheveled yet surprisingly limber Rowena suddenly springs to her feet and proclaims,"I am Queen Rowena, ordained prophetess of the Ancients, and former employee of the month at Builder's Emporium home improvement store #3876 and am here to announce my imminent return to civilization after a long hiatus in the Mojave desert subsisting on a diet of Perrier and Spam. Upon my arrival at LAX you will be given a pamphlet with further details about my spiritual journey." 
   Later, at LAX, I pick up Rowena anxious to hear more.  "So, what did you want again?" she asks with a look of half annoyance and half constipation, "make it quick, my bunions are killing me."  I remind her about the pamphlet and details about her spiritual journey.  "Oh, well" she says, suddenly turning red, "I had an accident, I sharted on my way to the airport and had to use the pamphlet to wipe myself. No worries, though, the pamphlet was only a cursory parchment of archaic rituals used to summon the dead regarding the deepest secrets of the universe, no biggie.  Anyway, I  had a revelation about you while getting an enema at the hospital last week."  
   "From henceforth you will be known as Troxem, don't complain, you know it's not easy coming up with a name," she continued, "Your mission is to entertain and enlighten a world starving for musical nourishment in a desolate environment of sonic indigestibles.  Please don't disappoint me and blow chunks."
   And with that, Troxem embarked on his mission.  Really? Listen and find out for yourself what Troxem is all about.

Followers of Troxem