More on this 463rd weekly Disquiet Junto project, Making the Gradient (The Assignment: Make a piece of music inspired by the concept of a gradient), at:

https://disquiet.com/0463/

More on the Disquiet Junto at:

https://disquiet.com/junto/

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The God Gradient (disquiet0463)

One More Minute

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Ewuta nayo means it's all from you; 
the song reminds us that all that we are and have is from God, and he takes care of us day and night... 

EWUTA NA YO

This was supposed to be a track that was for a colab project but me and my buddy had enough baggage that we both wanted to do solo tracks. It's really rough but this song hit's probably one of my biggest nerves in my life and I had to make it. Let me know what you think

Lyrics:
Lost my grandparents when I was a kid
It hit me like a truck, not prepared for that shit
I think a part of me died when they took their last breath
The real me died in 04, haven't felt the same since

This cancer thing is bullshit, it just takes and it takes
Erases all the smiles, cant remember their face
I'm not a man of god and I've lost all my faith
But I hope you guys are happy living in a better place

The three of us, eating lunch up at the table
Ralph and Marian, they were feeling so grateful
My grandma beat the demon that was feeding off her spirit 
She was living happy we no longer had to fear it

Then something happened, made her happiness disable
too young understand that things were turning fatal
The room filled up with silence, you could hear a pin drop
30 second convo would make my grandmas heart stop

I relive that memory, crystal clear unlike the rest
My grandma got a call about the cancer up inside her chest
She started sobbing on the phone, almost chocking on her breathe
She was positive again when they looked up at her tests

I remember all the strokes, had her glued into the bed
couldn't grasp the fact that she was surely coming to her end
She told my mom that if I missed her, here's what she can do
"Give him a hung and tell him that I passed my hugs from me to you"

She passed away while I was doing after school activities and I didn't get to say goodbye. But she wasn't alone, she had my Grandpa and mom by her

Not too long after, grandpa feeling it, the sting 
He lost the person that he loved, tied to this wedding ring
He lost the one that would make his heart sing
But truth be told all of us had felt the same thing

Some time had passed and he started getting sicker
Resonating pain, yeah started to get the bigger picture
It escalated, couldn't use the local medicine
had to take him to the city, fatigue was genuine 

We drove 3 hours, every single fucking day
Hospitals became my secondary place to stay
I wanted to go home grab some toys so I could play
I convinced my mom to take us home 200 miles away

On our way back, hit a dead zone in the center
Got home heard to voicemail that we lost a family member
That is a decision that I'll always remember
My grandpa died Sunday the 3rd, 2006 September 

He died alone in some fucking gurney bed
That is that pain that I'll always carry in my head
This is my cross to bare these words are never read
save you the trouble, put them in a verse instead

The Calendar In My Bedroom Is Still From 2004 - Single

The Calendar In My Bedroom Is Still From 2004 (prod. Jvsper x IOF)

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I am not a rapper I am not a singer I am a talker and a big dreamer

I'm sorry don't be mad pls

With the right perspective, this can be a very empowering statement.

It's not your fault that things are this way. It's not my fault either. And so with that, all you can do is go ahead and make the most of the situation. Just do your best.

And you're now accountable. 

There's no point complaining about how unfair it all is. It is what it is. So just get on with it.

You don't have to change the world. You can try to if you really want to.

But regardless...The World Is As It Is.

To me, that's kinda nice to know.

The World Is As You Find It #1138

A synth-y cover of "Libera me" by Gabriel Faure (from Requiem).

Libera Me

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