lyrics:

ocd
won’t you let me be?
you’ve taken all
you could from me
ocd just let me sleep
dont put your scary
thoughts in me

i avoid alcohol , i avoid drugs
and social gatherings cus i know how much
you hate when im out the house
you want me to stay
in my room in my bed picking scabs of my face
i avoid kissing and i avoid love
and i avoid friendships or hide for a month
you have taken all normalcy i could’ve had
and confined me to lifelong chronic distress

ocd
won’t you smother me
you can take my brain
i just want some peace
ocd
can’t you hear my plea
i am begging you
won’t you answer me?

Ode 2 Ocd

it disappeared from spotify and i couldn’t find it on here so i added it

Tragically So (So I’ll Feel Better) - Nervous Young Men

unfinished, forgotten & scrapped songs, demos & ideas i've decided needed more love than they got when i made them . these are from 2019-2024, & i hope you like them <3

instead of a therapist i see a nurse

one last time

he doesn’t get to win

PROD: @whyupsettt

LYRICS:

Ima go ghost 
Fuck what they say 
If its me I’m feeling great 
Yeah ima go ghost 
Spend my nights alone 
Sometimes it just feels like home 
Please don’t call me on my phone 
Yeah ima go ghost 
Yeah ima go ghost 
Yeah ima go

It’s like silent suicide
Not deliberate it’s a bribe 
So that I don’t insane 
I’m not sorry it’s my brain 
I can’t see you every day 
I get sick and tired, in pain 
Life’s a movie but a train 
If I pull the brakes I’m safe

You don’t know what’s at stake 
If I crash and burn again
I’ve been crashed a couple times
Couple people been at stake 
It’s not personal it’s mine 
Self-sacrifice of time
I care for you but keep in mind 
Finite energy is sourced yeah
When I’m tired bury me like a quartz yeah
On a good day maybe teach me I’ll play some sports yeah
Ima quart yeah 
Backer, yeah back her she’s not not slacker 

Ima go ghost 
Fuck what say 
If just me I’m feeling great 
Yeah ima go ghost 
Spend my nights alone 
Sometimes it just feels like home 
Please don’t call me on my phone 
If it’s light or dark 
Windows box me, it’s my throne 
Yeah ima go ghost 
Yeah ima go ghost 
Yeah ima go

It’s okay if you see it as obsurd 
I’m just tryna be myself, take my word
In this world yeah you gotta self-preserve 
Rather be strivin and dying yeah that’s my curse

I used to look out of the window when it rains, do you feel me?
And now I look back at those time like girl you so lonely
I know I’m rough around the edges, but I’m smooth if you know me
Judging books buy their covers ahhh, you so phoney

Ima go ghost 
Fuck what say 
If just me I’m feeling great 
Yeah ima go ghost 
Spend my nights alone 
Sometimes it just feels like home 
Please don’t call me on my phone 
If it’s light or dark 
Windows box me, it’s my throne 
Yeah ima go ghost 
Yeah ima go ghost 
Yeah ima go

Ghost

prod: @whyupsettt on ig

lyrics:

Do you feel the synchronicity
Running through your veins?
Do you wish that it would go? 
Do you wish that it would stay?
Do you wish that you were confident?
Say it with your chest 
You’re like a bird 
You’re like a beast yeah 
Better than the rest
Ohh reaping what you sow
Sexuality and sex
Psychosexual at your worst 
Demonology in bed
Dedicated to the art 
Demonstrating for the world 
Necromancer of the heart 
It’s a story of a ghoul 
It’s a story of a ghoul
It’s a story of a ghoul
It’s a story of a
Ahhhh
Alright 
Alright 

silence of the lambs
just the way that I would fuck me
You know I’m no cannibal baby boy you can trust me 
Calling on her phone and now you say that you gon get her 
Feed you to the pigs that’s why they call me hanni lector 
You still think I’m scary but I’m sweet like honey nectar 
Stir me in your tea I’m something new 
A brand new flavour 
Ima give you energy like ginseng Arizona 
New feelings springing up, gotta look over my shoulder 

Yeah shoulder 
barely even know her 
So sick of the leeches now her heart is growing colder 
Day by day the frost is defrosting she’s getting older
Melt you down and put you back together like a solder 

Hey solder 
Scars just like soldier
My emotions rolling down your back just like a boulder 
I’ve always wanted just what I want 
Baby I’m sober
If I tell the truth
Go on and lend me all your sonder 

Do you feel the synchronicity
Running through your veins?
Do you wish that it would go? 
Do you wish that it would stay?
Do you wish that you were confident?
Say it with your chest 
You’re like a bird 
You’re like a beast yeah 
Better than the rest
Ohh reaping what you sow
Sexuality and sex
Psychosexual at your worst 
Demonology in bed
Dedicated to the art 
Demonstrating for the world 
Necromancer of the heart 
It’s a story of a ghoul 
It’s a story of a ghoul
It’s a story of a ghoul

Ghoul

doll parts (hole cover)

lyrics:

day 4
thousand! of having the flu
been laying in my bed
drying my nose in my pillowcase

everyday seems to just become the same
a mixture of vivid nightmares
fever and cold sweats


didn’t you hear?
the icecream truck outside
everything so loud my brain is exploding

drinking ice tea
sorted my clothes
but im bored outta my mind
its like no matter what i do im just bored
its like no matter what i do im just scared

how can i change my mind set
if im sitting on it
guarding everything
i am lullabying myself to sleep
and i dont even miss you
cus my dreams feel so real
and you’re always there with me

i need to talk to someone who isn’t myself
i always gets so weird when im all by myself
on saturday ill get tattooed
id like some moldy peaches fan art

or maybe just hello kitty and a smiley face
i just wanna get well

Day 4000 of having the flu

64 little white things (cake bake betty cover)

lyrics:
i haven’t felt like myself for so long
i dont know who I’ve become
in the meantime
as the world passes by
I’ve been bedridden almost for a month
caught up cabin feber gone
in the meantime
everybody moving on

i cannot focus and now i am on my own
i am utterly alone   i am left to die again
all my friends all my friends
are so dear but far away  i am cooped up in my bed
dissapearing without trace

the worlds is caving in around my skull
making me forget that i can talk
making me forget how to reach out
making me forget that i am loved

but i can’t sleep in any longer
i can’t stay like this for life im not sick enough 
but sick enough to never be alright
i am wrongly wired  really tired
fighting for my right
to have a little hope that i will someday turn out fine

i haven’t felt happy for so long
i dont know where it has gone
in the meantime
I’ve been sleeping quite a lot
I’ve pretended everything was going fine
so i didn’t have to lie
if somebody asked me  if its gotten worse

i am sloppy with excuses  always covering my ass
i am scared of getting help
cus what if that shit doesn’t last
im on meds but still depressed
and therapy it doesn’t help
so im just tired of the fighting
can i ever catch a break?

i am happy for you happy for you but im so afraid
i am trying i am trying but i want this shit to end
i am lonely i am lonely yet avoiding all my friends
i am scared yes i am scared that i will one day kill myself

Tragically So (So I’ll Feel Better) - Nervous Young Men

robin