A Girl I'll Never Know

Disappointment

Disappointment (feat. Rxseboy)

HIGHSCHOOL DROPOUT

Good At Goodbyes

CHRISTIAN GATES-ARSON

I made this song because of the people who keep messing with my life.

Sleep Paralysis

Led To Lead ft. Alex White

Way Too Much

Wake Me Up (feat. Mak<3)

Doing Better (feat. Mak<3 & Pop Shuv')

i'm so sorry 
rip ashley </3
Stay with me, why'd you leave?

lyrics:

[Chorus: Prod. Deqz]
I fell in love when I was 16
Met a nice girl, the feelings hit me
Didn't know much, I was too young then
She had a hard time at home and words were unsaid

I fell in love when I was 16
Met a nice girl, the feelings hit me
Didn't know much, I was too young then
Wish I helped you out, I could have held your hand

[Verse 1: Happily Sad]
Yeah everybody told you to leave, get away, girl
Said i'm turning into the person you hate, girl
Started throwing fists, getting up on my face, girl
Then you threw a fit, it was more than a phase, girl

In a place you could never get out of
Inside you were fighting the outcome
Lot of thoughts that I wish you could outrun
But it all caught up and you're now gone

[Bridge: Prod. Deqz]
Why'd you go I'll hold your hand
Why'd you go I'll hold your hand
Why'd you go I'll hold your hand
Stay with me, why'd you leave?

 [Chorus: Prod. Deqz]
Yeah, I fell in love when I was 16
Met a nice girl, the feelings hit me
Didn't know much, I was too young then
She had a hard time at home and words were unsaid

I fell in love when I was 16
Met a nice girl, the feelings hit me
Didn't know much, I was too young then
Wish I helped you out, I could have held your -damn

[Verse 2: Happily Sad]
I fell in love when I was 16
And we always talked about our big dreams
But next thing I knew she's gone, i'm lonely
Yeah, she took her life to be with the old me

I'm sorry, girl, i'm sorry
Too much pain, getting drunk every party
I've been feeling off like a pause in my heartbeat
Girl, i'm sorry, i'm so sorry

[Verse 3: Prod. Deqz]
Aye, yeah, sorry i'm a bag of shit
In front of my eyes didn't read the script
I didn't get the hints, I didn't see your hurt
Now you up in heaven and i'm stuck on earth

I hate your mom for leaving you at home
Only you and your dad with his alcohol
Walk home from school, a new girl in your house
Drugs on the table and your dad on the couch

My girlfriend left and never left me clues
Didn't know this before, now i know from the news
I wish I had the power to go back in time
I would punch your dad and make sure you're fine

I would cut that rope and show you I care
Jeez i miss your face and that cute green stare
When I close my eyes, I can see you there
In the empty room with a fallen chair

[Outro: Prod. Deqz]
Looking back I was too young
No, I didn't understand
I wish that I could save you now
Aye, sorry that I can't

I know i'm not to blame
But I know I could have helped
Maybe you wouldn't be gone
If I just asked you how you felt.

(The End)

Meaning: “When I Was Sixteen” tells a story about a girl who (Prod Deqz?) fell in love with that had family issues, but he didn’t notice what she was going through until it was too late. He explains he was too young at the time to understand that everything isn’t what it seems. The girl was going through suicidal thoughts due to the abuse her father gave her at home, but she kept her feelings hidden. With the added pain of (Prod Deqz?) “ignoring” her problems, it led to her death.

When she eventually committed suicide, (Prod. Deqz?) feels guilty because he didn’t do anything to stop her, and felt he could’ve helped avoid her death. He’s going through remorse and regret due to not talking to her about her problems which he didn’t know about at the time.

She tried giving him hints and clues to show that she wanted someone to lean on but (Prod Deqz?) didn't catch on. Now that she’s gone, he realizes she was trying to tell him something but he was too ignorant at the time. 

Later he finds out one of the reasons she gave away her life was to be with his old self. He then blames her death on himself and her parents. He hates her mom for leaving her at home with her abusive father who didn’t even care about her or her mother.

In the end he feels it’s all his fault she died when he could’ve avoided it, and now he has to live with the burden of her death on his shoulders.

@prod.deqz x @happilysad - When I Was Sixteen (prod. Con)

Doing Better (feat. Mak<3 & Pop Shuv')

Emcee KB